Such a Softer Sin
by Crossbows-and-moonshine
Summary: Her grandfather's illness brings her back to Boston and Lila ends up with more than she bargains for when she meets two handsome Irish twins. MurphyxOCxConnor. Pre BDS. Read the author note.
1. Chapter 1

**I know you all probably hate me since I've not been updating my other fics, but my muses have been all over the place. This one came to me, I had to write it. **

**It was supposed to be something short and sweet, I had planned for it to be around five chapters. But the boys had other ideas and decided they wanted more attention, so it's ended up being a lot longer. And I mean a **_**lot**_** longer! :')**

**The good news is that I've actually finished this fic which means you won't have to wait so long between chapters because they're all written. This is a first for me, I've never completed a fic before so yay me! :') I'm using my own experience for Lila and her grandfather, I went through this with my grandma, so all of this is personal experience and some of it was very hard to write.**

**This is set pre BDS.**

**The title of this fic comes from lyrics, I caught fire- the used. One of my fav bands ever. I was listening to the song when this idea hit me.**

'_**So kiss me like you did,**_

_**My heart stopped beating,**_

_**Such a softer sin.'**_

**Also, my Daryl Dixon muse is back and I've currently got 5 Daryl fics in the works. I know, 5, it's ridiculous, but he won't leave me alone. So if you're interested in a multi chapter Daryl fic (or five loool) then keep your eyes peeled. I'm trying to get at least 15 chapters for each of them before I start posting so that you aren't kept waiting like you have been with my others!**

Thunder boomed in the sky as the metaphorical heavens opened, the sky alight with flashes of lightning every so often. Lila ran as fast as her legs could carry her, her clothes stuck to her like a second skin. Of course she would get caught in this weather, she didn't know why she was so surprised at her misfortune when her whole life had been a shit show. Her first day back in Boston and she was already hating being here. She stood huddled under a shops tarp as she tried to figure out where to go next, her arms wrapped around herself like a protective shield from the rain. Her black t shirt and jeans were soaked through and felt uncomfortable, like she was wrapped in a blanket made of ice.

Lila had moved to Boston with her grandfather. She had been his live in help and carer for the past year since his dementia and lung cancer had took a turn for the worst. So when the man said he wanted to go back to Boston, she didn't feel like she could say no, and she had no intentions of not coming with him. She herself was born in Boston, her grandad was Irish and the Irish community here in Southie was booming. She was raised here by her parents, but when she was 10, her mother and grandfather decided to move to New York after her father was murdered. He was caught in the crosshairs of a mafia war, just an innocent bystander that was collateral damage. And as a result, she was left fatherless and heartbroken. She never wanted to set foot back in Boston after that, she wasn't stupid enough to think the mafia weren't still running things here despite the 11 years that had gone by. But her grandfather really wanted to come back here, the closest to home he could get since he couldn't travel. He knew he didn't have too long left, and she couldn't really deny him what was essentially his dying wish.

When they arrived, the small apartment they'd rented wasn't what she'd expected. She wasn't exactly well off and didn't have some fancy ass place back in New York, but this was ridiculous. The whole thing was like one big room, the only private bit being the bathroom that had nothing but a toilet and a sink. There wasn't even a shower. And then there had been the search for a part time job that she had undertaken as soon as they unpacked. She didn't want to leave her grandfather at all, but he couldn't work and she needed to earn at least some money in order for them to live. But it seemed no one was fucking hiring. Either that or no one wanted to hire _her._ And now, on her way back home, she was caught in a storm, and she fucking hated them. Loud noises as always scared her, sending her back to being a 10 year old girl and hearing the gunshot from the car as her dad was shot, walking back to the car from paying for gas.

She was soaked, cold and scared and she needed to get inside somewhere to wait for the rain to calm down. She hadn't expected the storm, if she did she would have worn a fucking coat. Her red wavy hair that she had inherited from her mother was luckily up in a messy bun, bar a few tendrils that framed her face, lest it clung to her head and make her look like a drowned rat. She really fucking hated storms. She saw a sign across the road for a pub and she made a mad dash for it. It would be warm inside at least, and it was an Irish bar. She always felt at home there, her mother worked in one back when they lived here and then worked at another in New York. She pushed open the door and the warmth enveloped her, making her sigh with relief. She moved to sit in a booth and closed her eyes. She didn't even realise she was shivering, her clothes still wet and cold and the hair that fell around her face was dripping onto her. The warm air in the pub could only do so much to warm her whilst she was still wearing them and piss wet through.

She sniffled a little and hoped to God she wouldn't come down with a cold from being caught in the rain. She seemed to get sick at every fucking chance and it made her life that much harder. She was in her own world when a blanket was suddenly draped around her and a shot of whiskey placed in front of her, she looked up shocked only to find a pair of piercing blue eyes looking at her.

"Ye looked cold love." The man said with a boyish smile, looking almost innocent despite his smoldering looks. She blinked at him for a minute like the cold had made her brain malfunction a little. He had dark brown hair and was dressed in a black t shirt that stretched across his broad shoulders and a pair of jeans, almost mirroring what she herself was wearing.

"Uh...thanks." She replied, still looking a little confused. Since her life was mainly looking after her grandfather now, she had almost forgot just how it was to be in an Irish pub. The people in New York were so closed off, the opposite to how they were in this little Irish community here in Southie. He chuckled a little and shifted on his feet, looking like he wanted to sit in the booth with her but was fighting against the urge. Maybe he was waiting for her to offer, not wanting to just impose himself on her, but she couldn't find it in herself to ask him to, she wasn't really in the mood for company.

She wasn't really sure what to say, she was cold and miserable at her failure to get a job and she was worried about her grandad being back home alone whilst she was caught out in the storm. When she didn't say anything else, the man gave her a nod with a small smile before returning to sit at the bar, next to a guy wearing the same clothes but with dark blonde hair. The blonde was looking at her and he looked almost concerned and she wasn't sure why it unsettled her. She turned away from them and downed her shot, welcoming the warmth that spread through her body as she did. The men kept looking at her every so often as they spoke in hushed tones but she ignored it. If she learnt anything from coming from an Irish family and having a mother that worked in Irish pubs, it was that they looked out for each other, it was one of the reasons she chose to come inside here to get warm and not anywhere else.

A few minutes passed before the barmaid came over, she looked around 40 with dark brown hair with a few grays mixed in. She had a kind face as she came over.

"Can I get ye anythin'? Some food or somethin'?" She asked with a warm smile. Lila wondered just how bad she looked if everyone seemed so concerned about her. She knew she was soaked through and she could feel her body trembling pretty bad, but she hadn't caught a glimpse of herself and she wasn't sure she wanted to with how everyone was acting.

"I'm okay thank you. I just need to wait for the storm to pass." She replied with a small smile of her own, but it didn't meet her eyes.

"Do ye need te call anyone? We have a phone ye can use." The woman offered politely. Lila thought about it, it would be good to check in with her grandad and make sure he was okay.

"Yeah, thanks. I need to check in with my granda." Despite the fact she was born in Boston, her parents were both Irish born and bred. Lila didn't have an accent yet she still said the same terms the Irish used as a result of her Irish upbringing. The woman could tell she had at least some Irish in her, her hair was a dead giveaway and her pale skin. The woman nodded and led her to the phone behind the bar and Lila followed gratefully, the blanket still wrapped around her.

The phone wasn't exactly private, it was right behind the bar and next to the man who had helped her earlier and his friend. They were both watching her curiously and it was making her slightly uncomfortable as she picked up the receiver and dialed her grandfather's new number. She knew the men wouldn't be able to hear the whole conversation and she hoped the lull of conversation in the bar was enough to drown out her side of it too. After a few rings her grandfather answered.

"Hello?" He asked gruffly, making her grimace a little. Her grandfather was always a lovely man, affectionate and happy. But since his condition got worse he started getting angry, a short fuse. His confusion made him mad and she felt sorry for him. She couldn't even imagine what it would be like to forget things like he did, important things and people.

"Granda? Are you okay?" She asked softly, her hand clutching the receiver tightly. She knew when he sounded like this he was having one of his moments.

"Who the fuck is this?" He barked at her. Her heart squeezed a little, she would never get used to having to deal with this.

"It's Lila granda, your granddaughter, remember?" She prompted softly, sometimes that was enough to make him remember and snap out of it, but as time went on it was getting harder and harder to do it.

"I don't have a granddaughter! Are ye takin' the piss? Who is this?" He growled angrily, making her bow her head and inhale a shaky breath. It didn't matter how many times she went through this, every time he forgot who she was and acted like this towards her, it hurt like hell. She felt tears stinging her eyes and she tried to summon courage to answer him.

"I just told you granda, it's Lila. Your daughter Mary's daughter. I live with you remember? I take care of you." Her voice wobbled as she spoke, betraying her at how upset she was getting. There was a long silence on the phone and she wondered if he was even still there.

"Aye...Lila...where are ye? Shouldn't be out in a storm lass." She breathed a sigh of relief and sniffled a little, a mixture of the cold and the pain expanding in her ribcage.

"I got stuck in the rain granda, I'm waiting it out in a pub. I'll be home soon okay?" She said softly as she wiped her eyes. She knew despite the fact he currently remembered her, once she got home she would have to go through it again. It was never ending and it was getting harder for her to deal with. The 21 year old girl hadn't ever expected to be caring for another person like this, to have to watch them deteriorate before her very eyes. The man had raised her after her father had died, it was killing her to see him like this.

"Alright, be safe gettin' home Delila."

"I will granda. Love you." She wiped her eyes again and bit her lower lip with a sigh.

"Love ye too." With that he hung up.

Lila put the phone back and heaved a sigh, she could feel eyes on her and she glanced to her left to see the same two men watching her sympathetically and she fucking knew they had heard her. She looked away feeling weak and pathetic for being such a mess and walked back over to the booth she had been sitting at. Ten minutes later the rain had calmed down enough and she knew she had to go before it picked up again. She stood and folded the blanket neatly, bringing it with her empty shot glass to the bar and handing them to the barmaid from earlier. The woman gave her a warm smile before she slipped out of the door and made her way back to the tiny apartment that she now shared with her grandfather.


	2. Chapter 2

**Lila gains a job and makes some friends...some very handsome Irish friends :')**

Three days passed since she was caught in the storm and things hadn't been much better for Lila. She still had no job and it was stressing her out. Her grandfather had some money saved for them to get by, but she hated using his money. She didn't really know where else to look for a job and she was at her wits end. Her grandfather seemed to be loving being back here though which was something. An old friend of his had come over to visit and relax with him so she decided to make herself scarce for a few hours. She was wearing a dark green t shirt and jeans, her knee high doc marten boots and a black hoodie, she learnt her lesson last time to bring a jacket.

She didn't really know where to go, the last time she was in Boston, she was 10, so she was unfamiliar with the place. She wandered around for a bit before coming back to the pub she had seeked refuge from the rain. It was around 8pm, and she had to be home by 10pm, when her grandads friend would be heading home. She looked at the pub and decided to go in, she could have a couple of beers and just relax in there knowing she was safe. The city put her on edge after what had happened to her father, she didn't feel safe just walking around the streets on her own.

She pushed the door open and walked in, this time going to the bar instead of a booth. Her eyes scanned the place taking everyone in and at the bar over to her left she saw the men from three days ago with another man with wild hair. They were all laughing at something the hairy man said and seemed like they'd been already been drinking a while. She felt a little bad for not talking to the man more when she was here last time, but she just wasn't naturally outgoing like that. She wasn't exactly shy but living in New York meant she was just used to keeping to herself and not talking to people she didn't know. When she got to know someone, she was outgoing, loud and downright cheeky, but with strangers she was just reserved. The barmaid recognised her and gave her a bright smile, no doubt happy Lila was alive and didn't die of hypothermia from last time. She knew she looked much better. When Lila had returned home after her last visit she was shocked at how she looked. She knew people had been concerned and she knew why. She looked like she had been aboard the Titanic when it had sank. Now she was dry and healthy looking. Her red wavy hair down and flowing past her shoulders. Her cheeks had a healthy blush and her pale complexion looked healthy, not like she was on the verge of death.

"Ye came back! Ye look so much better." The woman smiled warmly at her as she stopped in front of her. Lila blushed slightly at the fact she was just thinking the same thing. She was unaware that the barmaids loud voice had alerted her presence to the young men sat a few seats away at the bar.

"Yeah, a little less like a drowned rat today." Lila snorted a little as she smiled at her. The woman grinned and poured a shot of whiskey, setting it infront of her.

"On me. I'm glad ye came back, we were worried about ye." She admitted, looking all motherly. She glanced at the men as she said it, indicating they too had been worried and Lila braved a glance at them. The dark haired one gave her a lopsided grin whilst the blonde one gave her a smirk.

"Aye lass, we had half a mind te follow ye te make sure ye got home alright." The blonde spoke up with a grin.

"Hmm… because that's not creepy." She teased playfully before downing her shot, enjoying how it burned a little on the way down. The darker haired man barked a laugh and got an thwack across his head off the blonde one. She found it amusing watching them together.

"I'm Connor. This is me brother Murphy, and the hairy mess over there is our good pal Rocco." He grinned, nodding his head to the very drunk man hitting on a woman across the room, unsuccessfully. Lila snorted a little and shook her head as she looked from the hairy man to the boys once again. She was feeling better about talking to them since she wasn't soaked through and grumpy.

"Lila." She replied, tilting her head a little with a smile. Murphy bit his lower lip as his lips turned up into a slight smile as he watched her and Connor just gave her a cheeky grin as he sipped his beer.

"Are ye new here? Don't remember seein' ye around." Murphy spoke up as he glanced at her through his lashes, fishing his smokes out from his pocket. Connor gave him a side glance, knowing the words left unsaid. _'Cause we'd remember a pretty lass like you._

"Kind of. I was born here, left when I was ten. But my granda wanted to come back. He's sick." She explained with a sad smile. The boys nodded in unison as Murphy passed his brother a smoke and they lit up at the same time. The pair had a way of moving that was synchronised and she found it fascinating.

"Sorry te hear he's sick lass. I noticed ye call him granda but yer not Irish." Connor looked at her curiously. He said it more as a statement than a question but she knew what he was getting at.

"My parents are Irish. Hence the hair." She snorted. "I don't have the accent but I guess I still use the terms. I'm the only one in my family that doesn't have the accent." She smirked.

"Ah… thought ye had a bit o' Irish in ye love. Can see it." Murphy gave her a bit of a once over as he said it and she felt her cheeks heat up ever so slightly at his gaze. She doubted it was anything sexual though, despite his smoldering eyes. These two were ridiculously attractive. She had no doubt they had the pick of whatever girls came in here.

She was broken out of her thoughts by Connor calling the barmaid over, Aileen apparently, and ordering them all a round of beers. She would have protested but she was never one to turn down free drinks.

"Should sit over here lass, easier te talk te ye. We don't bite." Connor grinned, his eyes twinkling with mischief. The pair looked like handsome men yet they exuded a boyish charm that made them seem so young and carefree. She grabbed her beer and walked over, Murphy stood and slid onto a stool to let her sit in between them. They were sat so close that her arm was brushing Murphy's and her leg was touching Connors. It was a tight squeeze and she couldn't work out why neither of them made an effort to move away a little when they had the room to do so.

"So, is it just you and yer granda?" Murphy asked curiously, turning his head to see her. He had his arms resting on the bar as he watched her.

"Yeah. I'm his carer. I didn't really want to come back here but he wanted to, I couldn't say no. He's with an old friend tonight, it's why I came here for a bit." She replied, looking at him shyly. His eye contact never wavered and it almost unsettled her with how intense it was.

"Whats wrong with him, if ye don't mind me askin'?" Connor asked, making her look away from Murphy and to him instead. Connors eyes were soft and caring as he looked at her.

"Lung cancer and dementia. It's pretty bad. He doesn't remember who I am most times now." She sighed, her brow furrowing a little. The boys nodded, they had heard her on the phone days before and they figured it was something like that. They had seen just how upset she had gotten and they felt for the poor girl.

"It's nice that he has ye te look after him though. Why didn't ye want to come back here?" Murphy asked. She felt like she was getting whiplash looking back and forth at the pair as they fired questions at her.

"I uh...My da was murdered when I was ten. Caught in the crossfire of some mafia war. Ma and granda took me and left. It was too hard to stay here after that and they thought we wouldn't be safe." She explained softly, not looking at either of them. She missed the dark look the pair shared over her head as she sipped her beer.

"Sorry to hear that love. Don't seem to have much luck aye?" Murphy offered her a small smile, and she couldn't help but return it. It was so easy to talk to these two, it was nice. She was worried she wouldn't make any friends coming back here, but it turned out she was wrong.

"Thanks Murphy. Oh hey, do either of you know somewhere that's hiring? I've asked everyone and no one wants me. I really need something part time to pay the bills." She sighed, looking between the pair. They looked to each other, sly grins creeping across their faces that made her squint suspiciously.

"Aileen!" Murphy yelled over to the barmaid, making Lila jump a little at his unexpected loudness. He looked at her and snorted a little, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her so close to him she almost slid off her own stool.

"Sorry love, didn't mean to scare ye." He smirked, he didn't look sorry in the least and he made no effort to move his arm either. Lila could feel the heat radiating off him and he smelt quite pleasant. The woman came over looking at the boys curiously.

"Ye still need a hand in the bar? Our girl Lila's lookin' for some part time work." Connor grinned, looking all innocent like butter wouldn't melt, despite the firm hand that came to rest on the girls knee. Aileen huffed a laugh at the pair and shook her head in amusement.

"Ye have any experience sweetheart?" She asked her kindly. Lilas face lit up a little of the prospect of a job, one that she could definitely do.

"Yeah, my ma works in an Irish pub back in New York, I went and helped out a lot for some extra cash." She smiled. Aileen nodded and looked over the three of them.

"Well then, can ye start tomorrow, come about 8?" She asked. Lila beamed a smile at her and nodded. The day was looking up now. She had a job and friends. Maybe things wouldn't be too bad.

Time flew by as the trio sat together and spoke about anything and everything. The boys took great pleasure in telling her embarrassing stories about each other and she laughed nearly the whole time. It was like they were having a competition to see who could make her laugh the most. Rocco was passed out in a booth, not being able to handle his alcohol. Murphy had laughed his ass off about it as Connor dumped him in the booth, telling Lila how it was because he wasn't Irish, he couldn't keep up with them. They kept touching her, little touches here and there. Arms briefly wrapped around her shoulder or waist, hands touching hers. She didn't think too much about it though, they were just being friendly.

She glanced at the clock and noticed it was 9.45. She knew she had to leave, it would take 15 minutes to get back home. She felt sad at having to leave. This was the most fun she'd had in a long while and she dreaded going back home to her granda. She had an overwhelming guilt at the thought, she knew it was bad. But she couldn't help it, it was killing her seeing him the way he was.

"Alright boys, I need to go." She sighed as she finished off her beer and stood, putting her hoodie back on. The boys glanced to each other before back to her.

"How ye gettin' home lass?" Connor asked as he turned on his stool to look at her, Murphy mirroring his brother.

"I was gonna walk, but I think I'll just take a cab, it's easier and honestly I'm tired, it's been a long ass day." She smiled, zipping up her hoodie. She missed the looks of disappointment cross the brothers faces briefly. They had hoped she was walking so they could offer to walk her back, a chance to spend more time with her.

"Aye alright, we'll see ye tomorrow then?" Murphy asked looking all hopeful and she stifled a laugh at his ridiculously cute face. It felt good that the boys wanted to see her again, the feeling of the blossoming friendship wasn't just in her head.

"O' course ye'll see her tomorrow ye twit, she works here now." Connor laughed, loving embarrassing his brother at every chance he got. Murphy scowled at him and Lila couldn't help but feel like he was about to pounce on his brother. She had encouraged them enough tonight with their sibling rivalry and she didn't want to stick around and watch it get physical.

"Yes Murph, I'll be here." She smiled brightly at him, making him look at her, his scowl melting off his face and replaced with a beautiful full smile. She decided she rather liked that look on him.

She was about to head out when Murphy slipped off his stool, sauntering the few steps over to her with such grace that contradicted the brooding young mans features. She was suddenly enveloped in strong arms. She hadn't expected a bear hug, any hug for that matter, but it was nice. It had been far too long since she had friends and she couldn't remember the last time someone had actually hugged her. She wrapped her arms around his middle, she was a little short and he rested his chin on her head as his arms tightened just a little. She wasn't sure how long they stood like that for, it felt like forever yet it seemed not long enough, but someone clearing their throat snapped her out of it. She moved away but before her brain had time to register anything, another pair of arms were wrapped around her. One thing she figured out was, the boys gave equally good hugs, they were comforting and made her feel happy.

When Connor was finished hugging her, she moved away and smiled at them both. She couldn't wait for the next night to see them again and start her new job. To feel like she had some semblance of life other than being a carer and having her heart broken over and over as she watched her beloved granda get worse every day. They said their goodbyes and she left, flagging down a cab. She felt the dread settle in her stomach as it got closer to home, it always set her on edge not knowing what she would come home to. If he would remember her or not. Not knowing what he would say. One time he asked after his wife, Lilas grandmother who passed away years ago. And when she told him she had died, he lost his shit, screaming at her. She'd never seen that side to him. Now she just told him she was out shopping, she learnt sometimes the truth wasn't the best course of action and it would settle him enough until he remembered again. She rested her head on the cool glass of the window, her hoodie smelt like the boys after the hug they shared and she smiled to herself. Maybe they would become good friends and she wouldn't have to feel so alone anymore after all.


	3. Chapter 3

**A long one for you lovelies, and a very drunk Murph!**

Murphy heaved a sigh as he flopped onto his couch. His hair was slightly damp from his shower and he flicked through the tv channels as his brother stood in the shower. They had just come from work and were getting ready to grab some food and then go to McGinty's. He was feeling impatient. Both he and Connor had spoke at length about Lila, how they couldn't wait to see her again. The pair couldn't get out of work fast enough.

_Murphy tossed the last of the packaged meat cuts into the box and turned to look at his brother, the pair wore matching shit eating grins, thoroughly pleased with themselves. _

"_Jesus Mary and Joseph, this is the quickest I've seen you two fucks work since you've been here!" Their boss laughed loudly, clapping them both on the back. The two felt slightly smug and hoped that meant they could leave early, not that it mattered too much since they wouldn't see the lass before 8 anyway, it just meant they could shower and take time to make sure they looked decent enough and didn't smell like blood and meat before they saw her. Connor went to walk past their boss but he was halted by a hand on his shoulder._

"_And where in the fuck ye think yer goin'? It's only 5. Since yer both such good worker bee's today, how about ye help old Johnny over there." He laughed loudly before walking off. Connor pinched the bridge of his nose as he glanced at the man that seemed way too old to be working full stop, let alone such a labour intensive job. Murphy growled and pushed the box he had just packed over in a temper, the wrapped meat cuts hitting the floor._

"_Pick that up too!" They heard their boss yell, they could hear his stupid grin from all the way over there. He had no doubt a girl was involved by how they were acting, he'd never seen them work so hard before just so they could get off early. Eventually he took pity on them, he couldn't stand to look at their miserable faces anymore, so he let them leave early, which earned him a very unwanted and dramatic kiss to the cheek from Connor._

Murphy was always the more impatient of the two and he was feeling restless now. He still had almost two hours before he would get to see her and he sat there drumming his fingers on his thighs anxiously. It was ridiculous really. He couldn't remember the last time he and Connor had been so anxious to go to the bar and meet a lass that they weren't really intending on seducing.

The day she stumbled into the bar completely drenched, he and Connor didn't know what to make of her. She was shivering and seemed a little out of it, but she was still drop dead gorgeous despite all of this. He and his brother had an argument about who was to take the blanket and whiskey over to her to help her warm up. They ended up flipping for it and he won, giving Connor the finger and a smug grin as he set off to talk to her. The lass didn't want to talk though it seemed and he didn't really know what to do with himself. He was usually over confident, cocky and all that. The lasses loved talking to him and Connor, so he was at a loss when she didn't ask him to sit with her or offer up a conversation. Nothing more than a 'thanks' and a blank stare. Then they'd heard the phone call, seen her breaking down a little. They both felt sympathy for her, she looked young, maybe 20 or so and Murphy couldn't imagine having that kind of responsibility at that age.

He'd wanted to talk to her before she left, but Connor told him to leave the poor girl alone. Connor wanted to make sure she was alright too but she seemed like she wanted to keep people at arms length, and as much as it pissed Murphy off, he knew he wouldn't help by just walking right over and plonking himself in the seat opposite her and forcing the girl to talk. So he sat there brooding instead until she left. The boys never really expected to see her again, so they were both pleasantly surprised when she turned up, looking heaps better and smiling. Her smile lit up the whole fucking room and Murphy almost fell right off his stool onto his ass when she graced the pair of them with it and her name.

They'd enjoyed the night with her, she was funny, fucking beautiful, and just easy to talk to. They didn't really have any female friends. Him and Connor tended to fuck the girls they met or have brief casual relationships with them, and although neither of them would be adverse to going in that direction with Lila, they just genuinely enjoyed her company, she made them both smile. It was rare they just enjoyed hanging out with a lass with no scheme for one or the both of them to get her into bed. There was no end game with Lila, she was just there and they liked her. She was easy to talk to and both of them thoroughly enjoyed making her laugh.

Connor sat next to Murphy once he was dressed, lighting a smoke and handing it to his brother before lighting his own. They were both silent for a while as they smoked, not really needing words between them. They were both anxious to get to the bar and see her, make sure she'd gotten home safely. The boys were natural protectors, they'd often stayed back to walk Aileen home if she wasnt getting a cab, so they felt the instinctual need to keep Lila safe. Especially after what she told them about her father. They were well aware of the mob in the area, especially with Rocco knee deep in shit with them and unable to get out himself. They knew what it was like growing up without a father, they knew it was hard and left an empty hole in your life, but they had never met their da, they didn't really know exactly what they were missing. Lila had 10 years with hers only to have him ripped away from her.

"Ye think she'll turn up?" Murphy asked after a moment, exhaling and watching the smoke twirl around in front of him. Connor hummed as he did the same, shifting to get comfortable.

"Aye, she needs the money and she seemed excited about the job. No reason not te turn up, unless she's fuckin' dead or somethin'." He snorted a little, making Murphy look at him with a horrified expression.

"Christ Connor! Don't say shit like that!" He scowled, his voice raising an octave as it usually did when he was upset or angry, making Connor laugh at him a little. It was far too easy to get under his brothers skin sometimes.

"Lords name Murph, ye know I'm fuckin' wit' ye. She'll be there." He replied with a smirk. Murphy huffed as he crossed himself and muttered a 'Mother Mary full of grace'.

Lila was exhausted and on the verge of being late for her first day of work. She could almost cry at how shit the day had been. She had been woken up at 4am by her grandfather shouting, confused and forgetful once again, and it took hours to calm him down this time. Then she'd had a whole list of jobs to do, and before she knew it, she had to leave. She arrived out of breath, her face flushed as she pushed the doors open. She made it just in time and she was thankful she wasn't late. She knew Aileen was a nice woman but she wouldn't take the piss out of people by turning up late to work, especially not on her first fucking day.

She was wearing her trademark Doc Martens and some skin tight dark grey jeans, with a black long sleeve tee. She was in such a rush she didn't stop to look around or notice the twins sat at the bar. How their eyes lit up when they saw her or how it turned to concerned frowns when they saw the state of her. She had dark rings around her eyes, making it clear she hadn't slept, she looked dead on her feet and out of breath from running to work. Aileen smiled at her, leading her into the back where she left her messenger bag and hoodie.

She started serving people as soon as she came out and Aileen was impressed she hadn't had to show the girl a thing, she was a natural as she chatted to the customers with a smile and served their drinks with ease. She finally made it to the other side of the bar and the boys were graced with a bright smile when she noticed them. The fact she was as happy to see them as they were her made them both want to jump over the bar and squeeze the shit out of her.

"Hey boys, you need anything?" She asked with a grin, reaching up and tightening her ponytail just a little. Murphys eyes were drawn to her elegant neck. Her hair was up in a messy high ponytail, a few wavy strands framing her face. Murphy didn't realise he had a thing about necks until now, he wanted to sink his fucking teeth into it, leave her full of marks.

He hadn't realised he'd spaced out a little just looking at her until he received a smack to his back that made him jump. It became apparent he'd missed Lila and Connor having a conversation and he blinked a little and looked to his brother. Connor could see his brother hadn't heard a word of what he said and he had two options, embarrass him and use it to his advantage or help him out. He decided today for the latter because it would most likely also embarrass Lila and he didn't want to ruin the friendship they seemed to have formed.

"Don't ye think she looks pretty with her hair up like that brother?" Connor prompted with a smile. Making Murphy grateful he wasn't just outing him for staring at the girl. He looked back at Lila who was blushing slightly as she poured them both a shot he didn't remember asking for, Connor must have ordered it when he was zoned out.

"Aye, real pretty." Murphy gave her a shy smile. When the fuck was he ever shy? Lila just snorted at them both and shook her head.

"Stop." She huffed a laugh, placing the shots in front of them. They didn't have a chance to talk further as someone else wanted serving and once again she was off.

Connor watched her go not knowing how he felt about her working here. She'd be busy all the time and not get much of a chance to talk to them, but at the same time, it meant she was here so they would see her and could keep an eye on her. She really was in her element here, she was so at ease and you wouldn't have even thought it was her first day. She looked like she was a permanent fixture in the place, like she belonged there. Connor wondered how she would react to meeting Doc, the old man was resting for a few days after a little fall he had down his stairs. He made a mental note to go and check on him with Murphy at some point.

The hours flew by, Lila serving people and merrily chatting away. The men in the bar were more than happy for a new face, a much younger and pretty face to serve them and Connor watched carefully, whereas Murphy just scowled at anyone that seemed to breathe in her direction. When she had a moment she'd go and talk to the boys but it was never for long before she had to get back to work. Murphy resorted to ordering more drinks just to get her back over to him, but it meant he was three sheets to the wind pretty fast and Connor took great delight in fucking with him about it.

"Lila sweetheart, could ye order Murphy some fries and some water, he's lookin' a little green around the gills." He laughed loudly. Murphy would have clocked him one if he wasn't resting his head on his arms on the bar. His brother wasn't wrong. He could handle his liquor well but he'd not even noticed just how much he was drinking just so he could keep Lila around. He made a pitiful noise as he tried not to move, the room felt like it was moving enough as it was. He heard Lila laugh and he relished in the sound, smiling to himself like a dope, luckily no one could see it.

"What was it you were saying about Rocco not being able to handle his drink Murph?" She teased playfully. The remark would have earned a good clout if it was from his brother, but he found himself even enjoying her teasing.

He went to speak but it came out as some incoherent noises instead and Connor almost fell off his stool laughing at his pitiful brother. Murphy suddenly felt a soft hand stroking his hair and he peeked out over his arms to see Lila's bright blue eyes looking concerned as she stroked his hair. Maybe he should get piss drunk more often if she touched him like this.

"Wow Murphy you look like shit. Let me get that food and water for you, you'll feel better." She frowned down at him, he literally looked green and she felt for him. She noticed he was drinking more than usual and she wanted to ask Connor about it, maybe something happened at work to stress him out. He wanted to protest when her hand left his hair but she was gone before he could.

He was pulled to sit up and he rested against his brother, letting Connor wrap his arm around him to steady him. To his credit, Connor was actually starting to look concerned himself.

"Jesus Murph, what were ye thinkin' drinkin' all that?" He sighed as he shook his head, eyeing up his brother with a furrowed brow.

"Jus' wanted 'er te talk te us more." He slurred, his accent thicker being this drunk and clearly not having a filter to admit such a thing to his twin. Connor snorted lightly and shook his head again, wiping a hand over his face.

"Aye, and a fat lot o' good it did ye when yer like this brother." He sighed, shuffling Murphy a little.

"Let's get ye over te a booth." He didn't wait for a response before he hoisted Murphy up and all but dragged him over to the booth. Murphy whined as the floor tilted and he clutched to his brother. Yeah his plan didn't go well, he looked pretty fucking pathetic and he could hear some of the other guys in the bar jeering playfully at him.

Connor sat him in the corner so he leant against the wall before he sat next to him, wanting to be close incase anything happened. He also knew Murphy didn't want him too far away, whenever the pair were sick they needed each other more than usual. Taking comfort from the other in a way that twins did. Murphy didn't know what happened, one minute he was with Connor, the next he blinked and Lila was sat in front of him, pushing the glass of water to him and there was a plate of fries in front of him. She gave him a sympathetic smile as she watched Connor help him drink the water. Lila noticed his face before Connor even did and she made a mad dash to the bar, grabbing a trashcan and running back with it. Just in time to hold it in front of Murphy before he hurled violently into it. Connor rubbed his brothers back and looked at the girl incredulously. He and Murphy were asuste at reading each other, he didn't really know how she saw that coming way before he had.

"Thanks lass, sorry about him. Doesn't usually drink like this." He huffed as Murphy kept throwing up. She seemed unfazed by how gross it was as she sat there and shrugged a little.

"It's okay, I've dealt with worse." She snorted. "Did something happen at work today? He drank a shit tonne tonight, is he okay?" She asked clearly concerned, it warmed Connors heart to see her worry about his brother like this and he knew if Murphy was in his right mind and could actually hear her instead of vomiting, he would have been a smug little bastard about it. He wasn't really sure how to respond to her, he knew Murphy was just drinking because he wanted to keep her attention like a spoilt little child, but he didn't feel like offering up the information. Just like before, as much as he would have taken great pleasure in embarrassing his brother, Murphy wasn't the only one that liked her. He didn't want to embarrass the girl or scare her away. He wasn't really sure what was going on with her, they were friends, or atleast Connor thought so, but he couldn't deny that he and Murphy had talked about how attractive she was or the fact neither of them would mind some intimate time with her. But it was different to the other girls that had been in the boys life.

They enjoyed being their own people, they'd had plenty of one nighters and a handful of casual non exclusive relationships. But he didn't know how he felt about doing that with her. He didn't want her for just one night, to make things awkward and never speak to her again, and a casual relationship, he didn't like that either. Because it would be awfully hypocritical of him to want to see other lasses and not want her to see anyone else either. She didn't seem the type to like those arrangements anyway and he wasn't even sure what to make of it all since it was both him and his brother that liked her. Sure they'd shared a lass or two, even passed some between them both a few times, but something like this, something that could potentially become serious, how would that even work with the three of them? He heaved a sigh, realising he was getting was ahead of himself, he didn't even know if she thought of either one of them that way, he wasn't sure he wanted to know, because if she only liked one of them, well that shit would get mighty fucking awkward pretty fucking quickly.

Murphy groaned as he finally finished throwing up all the alcohol he had consumed, he felt a little better but now the embarrassment was creeping in. Lila handed him some tissue to wipe his mouth and he couldn't even look at her, fearing she was finding it all too amusing. He wiped his mouth and tossed the tissue in the trash can before leaning his head on his hands. Connor rubbed his back for a moment longer and Murphy was just grateful he wasn't teasing him in front of the girl. Connor got up to deal with the trash can, he didn't want Lila to have to deal with that mess. Murphy stayed with his head in his hands and jumped when he felt a small hand rubbing his back, taking Connors place. He glanced up, the tips of his ears turning pink as he saw her giving him a caring smile. His heart fluttered a little, knowing she wasn't taking the piss or laughing at him, she seemed like she actually cared.

"Feel better? I always do after throwing up. I remember one time, I hadn't drank for a few months and then I drank a waaaay too much tequila. I didn't even make it to the bathroom, I threw up all over this one guy, then just conked out right in the middle of the bar." She snorted, hoping her embarrassing story made him feel a little better. It did, he gave her a lopsided grin and shook his head, grimacing as he immediately regretted the action.

"Guess it could be worse then aye?" His voice sounded hoarse from throwing up and he remembered the water. Lila seemed in tune with him though as she grabbed it first and brought it up to his lips. He didn't need babying but he found himself rather enjoying her caring for him like this. It made a twisted part of him hope to get sick sometime soon so she could come over and look after him. Fucking beat Connors ugly mug anyway.

Connor came back and sat opposite him, his brow furrowed as he rubbed his lower lip with his thumb. Murphy knew it was bad if his twin looked concerned instead of smirking or making some quips about him letting the homeland down. Lilas hand continued to rub his back and he found himself leaning to lay his head on her shoulder. He felt better but he was still piss drunk.

"I should get him back before he gets sick again." Connor sighed, looking at her regretfully. What started as Murphys plan to keep her talking to them ultimately was what made them leave her an hour before she got off work, he didn't even know if she was walking home and even if she was he couldnt do a thing to stop it.

"I'll come with you, I doubt you can haul him back yourself." She smiled, standing up ready to go and get her stuff. Murphy blinked warily up at her, there were three of her and he couldn't work out why.

"Absolutely fuckin' not lass, how the fuck ye plannin' on gettin' home from ours?" Connor had not intended on his words coming out so harsh, but he didn't exactly live in the best part of Southie and he wasn't having her fucking walking home.

She rolled her eyes a little and put her hands on her hips.

"I'll get a cab, I'm not letting you hurt yourself getting him home Connor, it's not up for discussion. I'll just follow you anyway so shut up and deal with it." Connors eyes widened just a little before he chuckled and shook his head. He hadn't expected the sass that came out of her pretty mouth and he knew he had no choice.

"Fine, but what about work, ye still have an hour left." He looked at her, almost smug like he made a point that she wouldn't get her way.

"I already cleared it with Aileen." She stated with a smirk, making Connor squint at her before she left to grab her bag and hoodie.

Murphy was sprawled out on the table, he was starting to feel like shit again and he jolted when he was suddenly pulled to stand.

"Connnn, be careful, feel like shit." He whined pitifully. He heard Lila snort a little and his eyes opened to look at her, feeling fucking mortified she had heard him. He let Connor wrap his arm around him and he felt Lila go to his other side, wrapping her arm around his middle. If he didnt feel like he was about to keel over and die, he might have enjoyed it more.

It took twice as long as usual to get to their place, drunk Murphy wasn't easy to handle. Whining and complaining, shoving Connor away not wanting his help and nearly squashing Lila when he put all his weight on her. She was surprised they all made it in one piece but she was glad she came, she didn't know how Connor would have managed it on his own, although she knew he would have. She doubted it was the first time one of them had dealt with the other being this inebriated. Connor opened the door, feeling half embarrassed about their place and the state of it. They'd never really cared until now since the lasses they brought around weren't anyone they really cared about, but she didn't even bat an eye. Lila looked around, the place wasn't great but neither was hers and she helped Connor lead Murphy to his mattress. Connor let go and went to lower him but Murphy flopped on his back onto the mattress, dragging Lila with him.

She squealed as she landed on top of him, his arms snaking around her. She felt very conscious of how her body was pressed against his and her cheeks flushed slightly.

"Look Connor! I caught a pretty lass!" Murphy laughed hysterically, bordering on giggling in his piss drunk state and Lila couldn't help but burst out laughing at him. He really was drunk if he thought she was pretty, beer goggles and all that. He was adorable and she found him far too amusing. Her laughter only spurred him on and he laughed even more. He vaguely registered Connor muttering an amused 'Jesus Christ', before Lila was suddenly gone. He blinked up to see Connor moving her away from him and Murphy actually pouted.

Lila was still laughing, and looked at Connor, shaking her head a little, Connor snorted and moved to pull off Murphys boots.

"Such a spoilsport brother, just 'cause yer jealous." Murphy whined like a child, wriggling around and making Connors life much harder to get him undressed for bed. The sight was ridiculous and Lila was laughing more as she walked over to peer down at a very drunk Murphy. He beamed a big grin at her and she bit her lip to stop from laughing.

"Murphy MacManus, stay fucking still and let your brother get you ready for bed, or so help me God!" She tried her best to sound stern despite the laughter bubbling up inside of her. Murphys grin faded and his eyes widened before he looked to Connor who was failing to hide his laughter now.

"Fuckin' hell, she's worse than Ma." Murphy muttered looking a little scared and slightly mortified. Connor barked out a laugh at the fact that Murphy had indeed listened and lay still to let him undress him down to his boxers.

Lila blushed and looked away, not wanting to ogle the drunk man in front of his brother like that. She knew they didn't think of her in that way, and they were ridiculously attractive. If she didn't turn away she would have no control over where her eyes decided to wander. Connor came back over to her and looked at her with a sheepish smile.

"Sorry lass, bet ye didn't think this was how ye'd spend yer first day at work." He looked apologetic and she smiled at him.

"Nah, it was much more fun than anticipated. Besides, when he's feeling better and tomorrow's hangover wears off, just imagine the fun you can have taking the piss out of him." She grinned mischievously. Connor laughed, delighted by her plan. This was why she fit right in with them both, she was just like them.

"Oh don't worry, I'm already thinkin' about it." He smirked. A loud snore echoed in the room and the pair looked over to see Murphy passed out, and they burst out laughing again.

"Let me call ye a cab aye?" Connor offered once they calmed down a bit, she nodded gratefully with smile and went to sit down on the couch while Connor went to his phone.

She noticed a pad and pen on the table and she jotted down her number in case they needed anything. She tore the page out as Connor sat down next to her, looking at her curiously.

"Just if you both need anything." She smiled as she handed the piece of paper to him. He grinned, feeling pleased she had offered up her number. Even if it was for innocent purposes.

"Thanks lass, yer too kind." He gave her a warm smile.

"Do you have work tomorrow?" She asked curiously as she sat back a little and turned to face him, he mirrored her movement and nodded.

"Aye, although I'm not sure Murph will be fit te go in." He snorted, glancing over to his sleeping brother, he knew he'd have one hell of a hangover tomorrow. Lila nodded, thinking of coming by to check on him, but she didn't say anything about it. She wasn't sure how her grandfather would be tomorrow but she didn't want to say she'd come if she ended up not able to.

They made some more small talk before the sound of a car honking downstairs alerted them to the cab. Connor walked her down to the door of the building, even after she insisted he didn't have to. He knew he didn't have to, he wanted to. She'd been a huge help tonight and despite Murphy's epic fail, it had been pretty fun, even if it was at his brothers expense.

"I'll see ye tomorrow then lass." He smiled as he stood in the door of the building.

"Just make sure Murphy doesn't overdo it this time, I'm not sure his ego would be able to handle another blow." She snorted, making him huff a laugh.

"Dont worry about it, I'll keep him in line this time." He grinned, stepping forward and enveloping her in one of those amazing MacManus hugs she'd come to enjoy, she felt a little sad she hadn't been able to get one off Murphy. She gave him another smile when she moved away before going to the cab and getting in.

Connor watched as it drove off, shaking his head with a chuckle.

"Oh Murphy ye stupid fuck, I hope ye remember every bit o' tonight." He grinned smugly to himself as he made his way back into the building and into the elevator.


	4. Chapter 4

**Lila checks on a hungover Murphy and Murphy gets jealous of his brother as he jumps to conclusions.**

Lila chewed her lip as she stood in the elevator going up to the boys place. It was dinner time now and her granda was having a nap, giving her some time to check on the very hungover twin. She had a thermos of chicken soup with her, not sure what else he would be able to stomach after all he'd drank the night before. She didn't know if he would even be here, for all she knew he could have gone to work anyway, but she had a feeling Connor wouldn't allow it. Despite Connor loving to take the piss out of his brother, it was obvious the pair did care about each other very much and looked out for each other.

The elevator stopped and she got out, walking to the boys door. She knocked firmly, not sure if he would be asleep or not and she heard some faint curse words on the other side. No one answered though so she knocked a little harder this time.

"Fuck off Roc! Ain't in the mood!" Murphy yelled from inside. She snorted a little and just decided to open the door anyway. She saw Murphy lay on his stomach in bed and he scrambled to sit up as he saw her. He hadn't expected her to just turn up. He'd spent the morning throwing up and feeling like he was dying. His head hurt like a bitch. It didn't help that he remembered every painful detail of the night before and he felt his cheeks flush a little just seeing her, remembering how her body felt pressed against his when he pulled her on him as he laughed like a fucking girl and called her pretty.

She blushed slightly too, seeing him sat there in just his boxers. She tried not to stare but the man was fine as hell. She shut the door behind her and walked over, sitting down on his mattress in front of him as he just blinked at her, unsure of what to say.

"I wanted to check you were still alive." She snorted. "I bought some chicken soup. I know you probably don't feel like eating, but you need to get some food in you." She smiled softly at him. He looked at her like she was a fucking angel, helping him the night before, now helping him once again. She was heaven sent, he was fucking sure of it.

"Thanks, ye didn't have te." He replied, smiling himself despite feeling like at any moment he was going to keel over and die.

She opened the thermos and poured some soup in the cup lid, handing it to him. He took it gratefully. He didn't think he was hungry but as soon as he smelt it, his mouth watered and his stomach growled. He started to sip it gingerly as he watched her take off her boots and cross her legs, sitting right in front of him. She was in her usual jeans and boots attire he'd come to adore but today she was wearing an off the shoulder black top, and he realised his thing for her neck wasn't his only new thing. Her collarbones and shoulders were just as delectable.

"How are you feeling?" She asked softly, breaking his train of thought.

"Been better." He snorted lightly, still sipping the soup. He was feeling better already at having some food in his belly. He watched her curiously, as she rummaged around in her messenger bag. He'd never really looked at it before but there were a bunch of hand sewn on patches on it, most of them curse words. It made him smile.

She made a little happy noise when she found what she was looking for and his lips quirked up at the sound. She was too fucking cute sometimes. She pulled out a packet of aspirin and got some out, handing them to him.

"What would I do without ye love?" He asked with a grin, using his soup to take them with.

"Be really hungover and miserable?" She offered with a cheeky grin. He huffed a laugh at her as he leant to sit against the wall. Her hair was down again today. It didn't matter what style she had it in, every time he saw her it was his new favourite but he knew it would change each time he saw her.

"Too fuckin' right sweetheart." He laughed lightly before finishing the cup of soup. He screwed the lid back on and set it down next to the mattress.

"I can't stay too long, I need to check on my granda. I just wanted to make sure you were okay, and help, even if it's just a little." She smiled. He gave her a weak smile, disappointed she would be leaving again so soon. He hadn't hid his disappointment very well and she wondered why he seemed so sad that she had to go. It was nice though to have a friend that seemed to genuinely enjoy her company.

"More than a little love, it's appreciated." He said softly, taking her small hand in his and squeezing it affectionately. She was used to the boys by now despite the short time she had known them, their little touches here and there, so she didn't think anything of it.

"Good, but when you come to the bar tonight, you're only allowed a few drinks." She grinned teasingly, making him groan playfully.

"Can't ye at least wait for me te feel better before ye start teasin' love? Its mean to kick a man when he's down." He whined, failing not to smile. She laughed at him and shook her head.

"Sorry, sorry. Besides, I'll leave it to Connor, I think he'll be teasing you enough for the both of us." She grinned, eliciting another groan from Murphy.

"Fuck me. I'm never gonna live it down am I?" He asked, pouting at her a little, it just made her laugh harder but that's what he hoped to achieve. Her laughter was like music to his ears.

"Nope." She smirked, squeezing his hand before letting it go and grabbing her boots. She slid them on and laced them up before getting to her feet.

Murphy went to get up to see her to the door, but she held her hand out to stop him.

"You need to rest." She said firmly. He wanted to protest, to give her a hug since he missed out the night before, but she crouched down, giving him an unexpected hug. It had been the first one she had initiated and he felt smug about it as he held her tightly, enjoying how her hair smelt like cinnamon. He blanched a little when he realised he didn't actually know if this was the first hug she had given out to the boys, he didn't know anything that happened between her and Connor from the night before after he passed out, he hadn't been awake for Connor to rub his face in it. He had a dull ache in his chest combined with a surge of jealousy. That was new. It was never that way with Connor. But he'd never actually liked a girl for more than their body enough to be bothered if Connor had swooped in before him to take her away. He frowned, still hugging her, as he realised him and his brother needed a very serious talk about the pretty redhead and where things might end up.

There was no way the boys would ever pick a girl over each other, even one as perfect as Lila, but the thought of her picking one over the other, it hurt him more than he'd care to admit. Of course his thoughts were running away with him, the girl might not want more than friendship with them both, but still, he needed to talk to his brother to make sure they were on the same page if anything was to arise. Murphy idly wondered if some kind of arrangement could be made, the three of them. They'd never done it before, not like that, anything more than sex, he wasn't even sure if she would go for it. Once again he had to remind himself that was even if she was interested. His head started hurting again but this time not from the alcohol.

She moved away from the hug, it was longer than usual and when she looked at Murphy he looked troubled. She furrowed her brow a little and stroked his cheek. Murphy felt butterflies bloom in his stomach at her soft touch as he blinked at her. Again, that was fucking new. He gave her a smile, leaning into her touch.

"Are you sure you're okay? I can...I can stay if you need me. I can call my granda and-" She started, looking almost guilty for leaving him and it made him feel like such an asshole. She had enough to worry about with her sick grandfather without him piling on top of it. Although he was touched she was willing to stay for him because she was worried.

"Nah love, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." He gave her the best smile he could muster, and she seemed satisfied, yet still hesitant. She kissed the top of his head sweetly before standing up and Murphy swore his head was fucking tingling from it. He felt like such a fucking girl. She was just being an affectionate friend.

"Alright then, I'll see you tonight. Don't let Connor give you too much shit." She grinned, grabbing her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. He laughed and shook his head, she already knew them both so well.

"I won't, trust me." He smirked, making her laugh a little. She walked over to the door, giving him one last beautiful smile before she slipped out. Murphy heaved a sigh and rested his head on the wall behind him.

By the time Connor was due home, Murphy was dressed and pacing the apartment. He felt heaps better from his hangover but his head was whirling with emotions and thoughts, and it wasn't made any better when he found a scrap of paper on the table with Lilas name and number on it. In his mind, she gave it to Connor, not for them both, but just his brother. It only fuelled the jealousy inside of him and he fucking hated it. He had never been jealous of Connor like this before, it was driving him mad, and now he felt like he had some fucking proof that she did indeed like his twin and not him.

Connor opened the door and saw Murphy looking much better than when he left this morning and he grinned at him.

"Well look whos back in the land o' the livin'!" He laughed as he took his coat off and threw it over the couch. His smile faltered though when Murphy glared at him, he looked pissed and upset all rolled into one and then he saw the paper in his hand and he knew right away what was going on. He could feel it from him, anger, jealousy, confusion. But before he had the chance to talk, Murphy beat him to it.

"Did Lila give ye this?" He asked, his low tone suspicious and accusing and Connor didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

"Aye but-" He started, wanting to explain how Murphy had it all wrong.

"I fuckin' knew it! O' course the lass I like has to be interested in_ you_, it would be too easy te get what I fuckin' want wouldn't it?! I should have fuckin' known this would happen!" He yelled, his voice getting higher as he booted the coffee table and sent it flying across the room. Connor heaved a sigh and walked over, only to get shoved a little too harshly for his liking off his brother. He was trying to be patient with him. He was used to Murphys temper. He was the irrational twin out of the two of them.

"Murph-" He tried again, but Murphy was having none of it.

"Why?! Fuckin' why you and not me?!" He tugged his hair as he paced like a caged animal and the raw hurt in his voice made Connors heart break.

He grabbed Murphys arm roughly and turned him to face him, his hand grasping the back of his neck to keep him in place and look him in the eye.

"She gave _us_ that number, not me, _us_. She said incase we need anythin'." He stated firmly. Murphy wanted to scoff but he looked in his brothers eyes and saw nothing but truth there. He felt like an idiot and his shoulders slumped a little.

"So...nothin' happened last night? After I passed out?" He sounded like a lost little boy and Connor resisted the urge to squeeze him.

"No. I called her a cab, she went home." His words made Murphy relax, all visible tension leaving his body and Connor led him to sit on the couch with him.

"Murph, I think we need te talk." He sighed, and Murphy knew he was right, he was thinking the same thing. He nodded and wiped a hand over his face, inhaling deeply.

"I don't know what te do Connor, I really fuckin' like her, and I know ye do too...it's different te the others. I know ye feel it." He said softly, chewing his thumb anxiously as he glanced at his brother.

"Aye, I know. She's damn near perfect but I won't be havin' her come between us brother. Even if that means we can't see her again." Connor stated firmly, as much as it pained him to say it. Murphy felt panic bubble inside his chest and he looked at Connor almost pleadingly.

"Please Connor, can't we just...figure somethin' out? The three o' us? I know we ain't ever done it before, not like this, but it could work." He was almost begging and he would have felt embarrassed if it wasn't for the gut clenching anxiety at the thought of cutting the pretty red head out of their lives. Connor scratched the stubble on his chin for a moment, mulling it over in his head, it wasn't like he hadn't thought about it himself.

"I thought about it too...it _could_ work. But ye realise she might not even like us that way aye? We're just friends Murph, think we're both gettin' way ahead o' ourselves here just presumin' it would turn inte more." Connor sighed, always the responsible one, looking at his twin carefully. Murphys face fell visibly, he knew that but it was hard to remember when he was so caught up with how she made him feel. But he would settle on being her friend if that's all she wanted just to keep her in his life.

"Aye, I know." He whispered, looking down at his hands.

"Alright, so we agree, no more jealousy aye? Ain't no need for it brother." Connor gave him a stern look and Murphy nodded resolutely. He felt better now the air was cleared, now he knew where they both stood on the matter. They'd either both pursue her or neither, and that he could live with.

They ordered take out and watched tv whilst they ate, the usual relaxed atmosphere coming back. Connor smirked to himself remembering how jealous Murphy got. God help anyone who tried to fucking pursue the lass. It wasn't like she didn't have the right to see anyone, they were just friends after all. But he wouldn't like it and he knew Murphy wouldn't either. But Murphy had always found it hard to hide his feelings. He wore his heart on his sleeve and what you saw with him was what you got. Lila was a pretty lass, Connor had already noticed the looks Murphy doled out just from guys looking at her, he had a feeling there would be some broken noses in the near future.


	5. Chapter 5

**Lila gets asked out on a date by someone other than the twins, and Murphy gets jealous...again. :')**

Lila walked to work with a stupid grin on her face but she didn't care. She had decided to leave for work a little earlier today and she stopped to get herself a coffee, she got more than she bargained for though as she gained a date too. The barista had been quite attractive, although she found herself comparing him to the devilishly handsome Irish twins that had befriended her. She wondered just when the boys had become a scale to measure the attractiveness of potential dates and snorted to herself. The twins were way out of her league, hell even the barista was, so she had no reason to use them to pick her dates. She hadn't seen anyone since high school since she'd been so busy, so the thought of a handsome guy wanting to take her to dinner made her feel giddy. They'd arranged to meet at an Italian place the next day and swapped numbers incase the plans changed. She was still wearing her off the shoulder top that she had worn when she attended to Murphy earlier in the day.

When she walked into work, the boys noticed instantly she was already smiling, Connor quirked a brow curiously and half amused whilst Murphy squinted almost suspiciously. His suspicion was melted instantly though when she came to them first, making him feel smug at the look from some of the other patrons that she had graced them with that smile and her presence first.

"Hey guys! You need anything?" She was practically radiant and as beautiful as it looked on her, Murphy couldn't help the pit in his stomach that was growing at a rapid rate.

"What's got ye in such a fine mood sweetheart?" Connor asked with a smile.

"I have a date!" She beamed. And there it was. Murphy felt like a kettle on the stove, whistling with steam coming from it, as the rage turned from simmering to almost explosive. He knew it was ridiculous, they were just friends, but the thought of some other fucker putting his hands on their girl, nah, that didn't fucking fly with him one bit.

"That's great news lass." Connor smiled warmly, but Murphy wasn't stupid, he could hear the disappointment in his twins voice. He knew him all too well. Murphy couldn't bring himself to speak, he knew if he did it wouldn't be pretty and it wasn't the girls fault she was fucking beautiful and someone had asked her out.

Lila looked at Murphy curiously, he was glaring at the bar counter with his beer in a death grip. She thought the boys would be happy for her. Maybe he just wasn't feeling too good from the hangover still.

"How you feeling Murphy? Any better?" She asked, giving him a sweet smile. He was fighting the deep need to pounce on her and claim her as his and Connors, at this rate he'd fucking piss on her if he had to. Connor glanced to his twin, he could feel the anger rolling off him in waves and he knew he had to defuse the situation because angry Murphy was a fucking asshole and he wouldn't let him upset the lass. Of course Connor was disappointed with the news, but he was rational, he hoped it wouldn't work out with the guy and besides, they weren't her boyfriends. They were her _friends,_ and friends supported their friends.

"He's still got a bit o' a headache lass, ye'll have te mind him." He gave her a sheepish look.

Luckily she seemed to buy it, maybe she was just too happy to really care but she went about serving people like any normal day, except today she was more happy than they'd ever seen her. Murphy hated it. Some other prick had put that smile on her face and he didn't need to meet the fucker to know he didn't deserve her. He didn't deserve her pretty smile or her glorious laugh, her amazing company or her sass. Asshole didn't deserve to breathe the same air as her.

"Calm yerself _deartháir_ (brother), can fuckin' feel ye. Settin' me on edge." Connor warned, shooting his twin a look. Being twins was a good thing most of the time and the boys couldn't imagine life any different, it was all they knew. They could often feel each other's emotions when they were close by or if they were intense, and in this situation, they were sat together and Murphy was so fucking incensed, Connor was feeling it like a tonne of bricks. It was making _him_ angry and he was fighting to get the rational part of his brain to take over and realise the anger wasn't actually his own. It could be hard for them sometimes to distinguish what was their own feelings versus the others. Connor was more controlled and it was easier to compartmentalize Murphys feelings away and he used it to his advantage. Since he was effectively the big brother of the two of them, he liked being able to feel Murphy, reading him more than just his body language. Murphy struggled more though, the overemotional twin seemed to feed off his brothers feelings a little too much sometimes and he had a harder time knowing what feelings were really his own. Murphy scoffed and downed his beer, slamming the bottle on the counter. He was itching for a fight now, he wanted someone to cause some shit so he had an excuse to deck someone.

"Outside for a smoke. Now." Connor growled, he needed to take control of this before it got way out of hand. He grabbed his smokes and lighter and Murphy pushed himself off his stool and stormed out.

Lila looked at them curiously, wondering if they were having a fight, completely unaware it was her that was making Murphy like this. She quirked a brow to Connor as he looked over and he held up his smokes to show her they were just going for a smoke. She found it weird since they usually just smoked inside. Connor followed Murphy out and clipped him around the ear with a glare.

"The fuck are ye playin' at Murphy?! Ye remember what we spoke about? She's our _friend_, ye could at least pretend te be fuckin' happy for her!" He seethed, not wanting Murphy's jealousy to get the best of him and ruin the friendship they had with the lass.

"Oh fuck you and yer fuckin' holier than thou attitude! I'll just pretend te be happy that's she's probably gonna go off and marry some fucker shall I?!" He yelled. Connor squinted at him, unimpressed by his brothers dramatics, he should be used to it by now, yet somehow he wasn't.

"Have ye fuckin' heard yerself brother? Marry him? He's asked her on a fuckin' date! I doubt it would even go well." He chided, making Murphy throw his hands up in the air as he lit his smoke and inhaled, trying to will the nicotine to calm him.

Deep down he knew he was being ridiculous. He had no right acting this way and he knew she wasn't going to go off and marry the fucker. He just couldn't control his emotions. The door opened behind them and when they looked, Lila herself was walking over. Murphy tensed up and looked away, inhaling like his life depended on it. She stood in front of them with her arms crossed and a frown. Connor could practically feel the impending ear bashing they were about to receive. Their Ma had given them that look more times than he could count. Lila may not have been Irish born, but she was Irish by blood and it was never more apparent to Connor than in that moment.

"What the fuck is going on with you two? Are you fighting? Because you're brothers, you should love each other, so hug and fucking make up. That shit won't fly with me." She said firmly, glancing between them both. Murphy would have laughed if it wasn't for everything going on inside of him. How concerned she seemed to be at the thought of them having a serious fight and demanding they make up. He wouldn't look at her and Connor sighed.

"Not fightin' lass, don't worry about it." Connor gave her a small smile, wishing she would just go back inside, he wasn't sure how Murphys feelings were fairing right now.

She furrowed her brow and glanced to the darker haired twin, the one who had refused to meet her eyes all night. She stepped towards him and he tensed more, swallowing thickly as he braved a look at her. She looked so worried and it was like all his anger melted away, feeling bad he had made her feel that way.

"Murph? What's wrong?" Her voice was a mere whisper as she stood so close he could smell her cinnamon hair again, he licked his lower lip and shook his head.

"Nothin' m'girl, I'm fine." He lied as he discarded his smoke, he couldn't exactly tell her the truth and he hadn't even realised he called her his girl. She either didn't mind or didn't notice though as she studied his face carefully. He looked even more troubled than before she left him earlier and she hated seeing him like this. If they werent fighting she didn't know what the hell was going on with him, but he clearly didn't want to tell her and she wasn't going to pry. She couldn't deny it stung a little that he didn't trust her enough to tell her.

She sighed softly and nodded, having no choice but to accept his answer and she wrapped her arms around his middle, giving him a second hug of the day. He relaxed completely, wrapping his arms around her. One hand came to her lovely red hair as he just soaked her in. If this was as close as he could get to her, just being friends, he'd fucking take it. Her hugs had a way of calming him, shutting up his thoughts and feelings even if just for a moment. She kept her arms around him but looked up at him, making his stomach do weird ass shit that it had never done before as her big blue eyes blinked up at him.

"Sure you're okay?" She asked softly, making him smile, a genuine one this time and nod. She seemed satisfied this time and moved away. Connor had watched the exchange curiously, he had no idea how the lass had managed to calm Murphy so well with some soft words and a hug, she was fucking magic. But he felt the pang of envy, watching her hug his brother that way. She hadn't hugged him, he had been the one to hug her the few times they had hugged. It was fucking stupid, it was just a hug, yet he knew this was how Murphy had felt when he found her number.

He didn't have too much time to dwell on it though as the petite redhead moved over to him, gracing him with the same hug. He grinned into her hair and held her closer, his hand rubbing her back just a little. It was such an innocent sweet gesture yet it felt so intimate. When she finally moved away, she gave him a lovely smile and he returned it.

"Come inside when you're done and I'll pour you some shots." With those parting words, she was off back inside.

Murphy released a breath he didn't know he was holding as he slumped against the wall. He ran a hand through his hair, making it a little unruly and sighed. Connor moved closer, pulling him into his embrace as they just held onto each other for a moment, grounding each other. When they moved away, Connor took Murphy's shoulders firmly.

"Better now? She doesn't deserve to be worryin' about us like that." He frowned. Murphy nodded, he agreed wholeheartedly. The look on her face made his heart ache and as hard as it would be for him, he had to push his feelings down, at least whilst he was with her. She had a date, it wasn't the end of the world, fuck knows she deserved some happiness and he felt the guilt creep in at the realization that he had ruined her happiness for a moment. He let Connor lead him back inside.

Murphy went to take a piss and Connor sat at the bar. Lila came over and poured out two shots for the boys. She leant down, resting her elbows on the bar and her chin propped up by her hands as she looked at him. Her off the shoulder top gathered by the motion and he caught a nice eyeful of her cleavage. He had to force himself to look away after his lecture to Murphy about being her friend.

"Is he okay?" She asked looking genuinely concerned. It made him happy that she cared so much about them.

"Aye he will be sweetheart. The thing with Murph that ye'll come te realise is, he's over emotional. Quick te anger. His heart's in the right place but sometimes he can't control himself." He said with a small smile.

"And are _you_ okay?" She asked, levelling her gaze with him in a way that made his stomach flutter.

"Aye lass, I'm fine." He grinned at her. She nodded, lowering one of her hands to squeeze his hand, making him smile at her.

Murphy sat back down, he'd seen the exchange and he had to quell his jealousy. He'd never been jealous when he shared a girl with his brother sexually, because that's all it was, sexual. This was different. But he knew Connor would never do something to hurt him just like he wouldnt to hurt Connor. Lila gave Murphy a sweet smile as she pushed the shot to him and he found himself getting the same eyeful that Connor had, he cleared his throat as he forced himself to look at her face instead and gave her a smile.

"Better?" She asked softly, making him nod and smile brightly at her.

"M'sorry I ruined yer excitement about yer date." He sighed, frowning a little. He hated himself for it. He might not like the idea of the date, but she had been genuinely happy, happier than he'd ever seen her and he fucked it all up.

"You didn't Murph. Besides, you two being okay means far more to me than any silly date." And with those soft spoken sincere words, and a squeeze to his hand, she stood and went back to serving other people. Murphy just blinked at her, watching her work as her words sunk into his brain. Connor smirked as he downed his shot. He knew how much his brother needed to hear those words, hell he had as well, but Murphy needed them more. As cocky as Murphy usually was, Connor knew underneath it all was a young boy that needed reassurance. Having feelings for a girl was new to them, they were out of their depth and completely unsure for once in their life. Connors smirk grew as Murphy smiled to himself before taking his shot. Her words sent a warmth through his chest that outshone the whiskey and he felt strangely happy about it. She basically said he came first, well him and his brother, and that made him over the fucking moon. She also called it a silly date which made him feel like it wasn't as serious as he'd feared it would be. It made him relax about it knowing she cared so much about them.

As usual, time seemed to whiz by at a rapid rate, with Lila coming over for a quick chat every now and then. Aileen told her to finish a little early, so with a grin, she paid for three beers and looked over at the boys, nodding her head to the booth in the corner before going to sit down. It was a horseshoe shaped booth, and she sat in the middle and opened her beer, placing the others either side of her as she watched the boys move over to her. Murphy plonked down to her right whilst Connor slid in to her left.

"I can't wait to get home and devour some lasagna." She blurted out with a wistful smile, making Murphy snort at her as he sipped his beer, reclining to relax against the back of the booth, whilst Connor rested his elbows on the table and quirked an amused brow at her.

"Look at her face Murph, she looks like the lasagna's shown her a good time." Connor chuckled with a quirked brow, making Murphy give her a lopsided grin and she playfully squinted at the lighter haired twin sporting a smirk.

"It _has _shown me a good time. I make a wicked lasagna if I do say so myself." She grinned, taking a pull from her beer.

"Should let us try it sometime love. We're always up for some home cooked food." Murphy suggested with that devilish smile of his.

"That's a good idea actually. I always make up way too much food just for me and granda, I have to freeze the rest or just throw it out. I'll bring you some tomorrow." She smiled.

The boys visibly perked up at the suggestion. They hadn't had anything home cooked in forever and they were curious to see if her food was as good as she said it was. Connor looked to his brother with a smirk, he had no doubt even if it was terrible, his brother would fucking love it anyway just because she made it. He knew that because he would too.

"Are ye sure lass? Don't want te be too much trouble." Connor said as he looked at her carefully with a slight smile.

"Speak for yer fuckin' self Connor, I want some lasagna." Murphy laughed, shaking his head. Lila snorted a little, making Murphy shoot Connor a smug grin that he had made her laugh. And then it continued, the boys competition to see who could make her laugh the most. She felt like she'd never laughed so much in her entire life since the boys came along, it was nice to just let go and be carefree for a moment, to just be a girl enjoying herself without worrying about things.

Before she knew it, it was time to head home again and she hated the sad faces on the boys, it made her feel guilty for going on a date. She'd called a cab and was sat waiting with the boys in the booth.

"Do you want me to cancel? I can if you need me here, it's fine." She offered, the boys had noticed how she was a worrier and cared way too much about putting other people's happiness before her own. Murphy was about to answer with a very eager '_Aye, ye don't need a date, me and Conn will look after ye.' _But Connor shot him a look that kept his mouth firmly shut.

"Nonsense Lila, ye deserve te go out and have some fun aye? Ye'll enjoy yerself and not worry about us." Connor said sternly, despite his smile. Murphy felt like the words were directed at him as much as the girl and he huffed under his breath.

"Alright, if you're sure. I'll swing by and leave the lasagna at your place whilst you're at work, if that's okay?" She asked, glancing between them both. The prospect of Lilas home cooked food was enough to make Murphy smile once again.

"Aye, that would be grand love." He grinned at her.

The boys slipped out of the booth, allowing her to stand so she could run into the back to grab her bag and hoodie. When she came back, the boys stood once again, walking her outside. They lit up smokes in unison as they waited for the cab while the boys gave her a lecture on safety on her date.

"And if he tries any funny business ye don't want, kick him in the fuckin' nuts." Murphy grumbled, pointing at her and shaking his head. He was always so animated when he spoke. It was nice that the boys were so protective of her, that they were looking out for her. She bit back a sarcastic '_yes dad' _because the boys were dead serious and she knew they wouldn't appreciate her sass in that moment.

"This is our number, and this is Docs in case we aren't at home. Don't hesitate to call if ye need us, we'll come pick ye up if ye need us te." Connor said firmly as he handed her a beer mat with two numbers written on it. She gave him a grateful smile and took it, slipping it into her bag.

She moved over to wrap Connor in one of her hugs and he held her tight, his hand rubbing her back soothingly. When she moved away she wound her arms around Murphys middle, squeezing him with a smile as he held her close, his hand going to her hair and stroking it. The cab pulled up just as she pulled away and she grinned at the boys before getting inside. They both watched forlornly as it drove away, knowing they wouldn't be seeing her tomorrow since she would be on her date and Aileen had given her the night off.

"Fuckin' hell, miss her already." Murphy sighed, wiping a hand over his face feeling restless and agitated at the thought of not seeing her for a day, like it was the hardest thing he'd ever had to do.

"Aye. Me too brother, me too." Connor replied, clapping Murphy on the shoulder before they walked back inside.


	6. Chapter 6

**A lot of sad feels in this one. Warning; its intense.**

When Murphy and Connor got home the next day, they found a tray of lasagna on their table with a little note on top with directions on how to heat it up. They'd been miserable all day at work knowing they wouldn't get to see her and Murphy was brooding something fierce about the fact she was going on a date with someone that wasn't him or his brother.

_Enjoy it as much as I do ;)_

_Lila_

_xoxox_

They grinned to each other and after eating it, they had to agree, she did making a fucking mean lasagna. The boys talked about everything other than the elephant in the room, Lilas date, they both wondered if she would be okay, but neither wanted to vocalise it, not wanting to think about her with some other guy. They got showered and dressed and headed out for McGinty's, hoping some alcohol would make them feel better.

They were wrong, dead fucking wrong, after being there for an hour they didn't feel any better despite the many beers and shots they had drank. Aileen walked over with two beers, setting them down in front of them.

"What's up with the two o' ye, ye look bloody miserable." She asked, glancing between them both, it was unlike the twins to behave this way, they were always laughing and joking, teasing some poor bloody sod, usually Rocco, and just causing mayhem wherever they went. They had done nothing but mope since they got there and she had a good idea why. Murphy just shrugged, practically pouting as he lit what was probably his millionth smoke since he'd got there. The burning in his lungs was a welcome distraction from his thoughts in that moment.

"Nothin'." Connor grumped as he sipped his beer.

"Mhm...And yer sure it's got nothin' te do with a pretty redhead that ye both seem so fond o'?" She asked with a knowing smile. It turned into a full on grin when they both looked at her like they'd been caught out, mildly horrified and embarrassed faces and she swore the tips of Murphys ears turned pink. The boys hadn't realised just how obvious it was that they liked the lass, obvious to everyone but Lila it seemed. Aileen didn't know how the girl seemed so oblivious to the fact the boys thought the world of her. Aileen was glad the twins were looking out for the girl though, she adored the boys and knew they would do what they could to keep her safe. She just gave them both a quick pat to the hands before turning and walking off with a smirk, leaving a glowering Murphy and a grumbling Connor behind of her.

Lila got out the cab after her date as she walked up to her apartment. She'd had a nice time, they ate lovely food and chatted. She doubted it would turn into anything. He was handsome and nothing but a gentleman, but there just wasn't anything there. She found herself comparing him to the twins yet again and she knew that wasn't a good sign if she wasn't just thinking of him for him. He didn't make her laugh like the boys did, she didn't feel at complete ease with him like she did with them, he just didn't make her feel anything close to how she felt with the boys and she knew it was stupid since they were only friends. She was wearing a pretty black sleeveless dress with a sweetheart neckline. It cinched in at her tiny waist and then flared out, ending just above her knees. She got her keys out and opened the door. It was 11pm so her granda would most likely be in bed, she tried to be quiet as she slipped inside. There was something in the air, making the hairs on the back of her neck prickle up, a sense of foreboding, and when she walked into the apartment further, she saw her grandfather lay on the floor unmoving. It felt like her heart exploded in her chest and her stomach lurched as she ran over, kicking her heels off in the process.

"Granda?! Granda?!" She sobbed, grabbing his face and looking him over. He was unresponsive and when she tried to find a pulse, there wasn't one. She was hysterical, running to the phone and calling an ambulance before returning to his side. Despite deep down knowing it was too late, she hoped she was fucking wrong.

"Granda, please wake up! Please!" She begged through her tears, feeling like her heart had been stabbed repeatedly. It didn't take long for the paramedics to arrive and one of them ushered her out of the way so they could tend to the man. It was too late though, he had been dead for at least an hour they said and she felt the intense guilt that she hadn't been there. That she had been selfishly on a date.

When they called the time of death, she felt her stomach clench painfully and ran to the bathroom, emptying it of the fancy dinner she had just eaten. One of the paramedics came in, helping her and checking her over after she was done. The girl was in shock and he wasn't happy to leave her on her own.

"Is there anyone we can call ma'am?" He asked looking concerned. She shook her head, her whole body was trembling and she looked white as a sheet.

"N-no...I can't...can't stay here." She muttered, looking out of it.

"Is there anywhere you can go?" He asked her, eyeing her carefully. She nodded and sniffled, wiping her eyes as her tears subsided, the shock taking a vice like grip of her. The paramedic nodded, feeling satisfied she would be okay.

She wasn't sure how long she sat on the bathroom floor, she barely heard them removing her grandfather's body or telling her they were leaving. Eventually she stood, not bothering to put her shoes or jacket on since she was so out of it as she left the apartment. Her feet carried her to the twins, the cold hard floor hurting her feet but she didn't even notice it much. She was in a daze, her body trembling violently by the time she had reached their door. She was much paler than usual and her mascara had ran down her cheeks. She raised a shaky hand to knock on their door, swaying on her feet feeling light headed.

The boys were settling in for what was an early night for them when they heard the knock. They glanced to each other confused by who was knocking at this time, but a choked sob on the other side had them making a dash for the door. They hadn't expected the sight that greeted them, Lila had makeup running down her cheeks and her whole body shook as she sobbed, she had no jacket despite the chilly air outside and no fucking shoes on. The boys first thought was that something happened on her date and she had been hurt, and the fucker was going to be very sorry when they got their hands on him.

"He's dead...granda...he's dead." She cried, her hand over her heart like she was trying to stop it from falling right out. Connor grimaced and squeezed his eyes shut like he was in physical pain at her words and seeing her so heartbroken. Murphys brain couldn't catch up with himself as he just stared at her for a moment. His heart felt like it was squeezing so tightly in his chest that it was about to implode. Her gut wrenching sobs echoed in the hallway and it was enough to snap the boys back to the moment. Connor wrapped his arms around her, pulling her inside as Murphy shut the door. She was clinging to Connor like her life depended on it, practically wailing and it was heartbreaking to watch.

Murphy swallowed thickly and turned away, pressing the palms of his hands into his eyes trying to stop the onslaught of tears that were threatening to fall. He felt like he could feel her pain, like actually feel it and it was killing him.

"Hush now lass, we got ye, yer alright." Connor soothed softly, holding her tight as he rubbed her back. Her body was shaking badly as the sobs wracked her body and Connor looked over his head to see Murphy wiping his eyes as he turned back to face them. Connor gestured for him to take over and he did, Connor going to make a cup of tea for the poor girl.

"C'mon love, let's get ye sat down." Murphy's voice was a little hoarse and thick with emotion and he was trying his best to be strong for her sake. It wasn't like he'd actually known her grandfather, but he knew he was Lilas life and now he was gone, and hearing her pain, seeing it on her face, it was the worst pain Murphy had ever been through.

He led her to his bed, pulling her to sit with him and she sat with her legs across his lap, her face buried in his neck as she continued to cry. Murphy gripped her tightly, a hand in her hair stroking, trying to comfort her even just a little. He was willing the lump in his throat to fuck off so he could talk to her.

"S'alright m'girl, let it all out." He soothed, resting his head on hers and closing his eyes. Connor watched them as he made the tea. It was hurting him to see her this way and he could see Murphy having the same issue. But once again Murphy wasn't very good at trying to keep himself in check or at least hiding his feelings, and he could see clearly how badly Murphy was hurting, it only doubled Connors pain.

He brought the tea over, sitting in front of the pair as he set it down on the floor to cool a little.

Both boys had noticed her dress and how her hair was pinned up all fancy like with some wispy bits framing her face, she would have looked lovely if it wasn't for the fact her heart had just been ripped from her chest. Connor reached out and stroked her back, sharing a pained look with Murphy. They weren't good at this, comforting lasses, that wasn't what they did. They had no idea just what to do to make things better.

"Sweetheart, what happened?" Connor asked hesitantly, his hand still rubbing soothing circles on the exposed skin of her back. Of course the old man had been sick, but he just wanted to make sure he knew what had happened. She raised her head a little, sniffling and hiccuping as she wiped her eyes, which was pointless as more tears just followed. Murphys hand was still in her hair and massaged her scalp and he looked at her sadly. She wouldnt look at them and shook her head, her breathing erratic as she tried her hardest to calm herself enough to talk.

"I came back...and he was just...he was...oh my god its all my fault!" She was bordering on hysterical and Connors eyes widened at how she could think such a thing. Murphy's arm tightened protectively around her and he clenched his jaw, he was angry at her for thinking she was to blame for this but it wasn't the time to fucking shout at her. He just had to keep his mouth shut.

"Lila, it wasn't yer fault. It would o' happened wit' or wit'out ye there." Connor soothed, trying to reason with her, but it just made her cry harder and Connor realised he was absolutely fucking awful at consoling women.

"But I wasn't there Connor! He died all alone! I was fucking selfish and he died alone! I should have been there!" She was almost hyperventilating now as the sobs tore the breath out of her little lungs and Murphy's eyes stung once again with tears. He pulled her closer, letting her bury her face in his neck once again.

Connor wiped a hand over his face, he was at a loss for words and he thought about going to get Aileen because he had no fucking clue what to do. He looked at Murphy and noticed tears streaming down the lads face, his head was resting on Lilas and he had his eyes squeezed shut with a clenched jaw and Connor could see he was at the end of his rope with restraining himself not to break down as his chest heaved.

"Yer alright Lila, ain't yer fault. Ye couldn't have known love." Murphy whispered tensely through his tears, feeling like his chest had been ripped open and his heart torn out.

They sat like that with Murphys hand in her hair and holding her tight, Connors hand rubbing smooth circles on her skin, the both of them muttering soothing words to her until she passed out in Murphys arms. Murphy looked at Connor desperately and Connor knew right away he needed to get Lila off him. He scooped the girl up and lay her on the mattress, covering her up. Murphy dived of the bed and grabbed his smokes before all but throwing himself out the window onto the fire escape. Connor knew to give him a minute and he heard Murphy's choked sobs from inside, it made a lump form in his own throat. He looked to the lass and she was out cold, so Connor got up and climbed out of the window.

Murphy was sat against the wall with his knees up and his head in his hands, his shoulders shaking with his sobs. Connor crouched in front of him, stroking his hair as his own eyes started to sting. But he had to be the strong one, he always had to be.

"Come now Murph, I got ye." Mimicking almost the same thing he'd said to Lila when she got here. Murphy reached out as if to anchor himself on his brother, his hand winding around the wrist that was stroking his hair and clinging to him.

"Christ Connor, why _her_? Why does she have te go through this?" He asked sounding broken through his tears. He didn't know how to answer him, he was wondering the same thing. The boys had faith that everything happened for a reason and it was her grandfathers time, but it didn't sting any less to see the aftermath of it.

"It'll be alright brother, we have te be strong for the lass." He soothed, still stroking his hair. Murphy nodded and sniffled, wiping his eyes as he inhaled deeply trying to calm himself down. He hated breaking down like this but he knew it needed to get out of his system, and he rather it happened when she was asleep than infront of her.

"What now?" Murphy asked, his voice raspy and low as he glanced at his twin with glassy eyes. Connor tugged his lower lip through his teeth as he thought for a moment.

"We need te talk te Aileen, she won't be fit for work for a few days. And we need te check if her Ma even knows what happened." He sighed as he stood up, holding his hand out to Murphy to help him up. When they both stood, Connor pulled Murphy into a tight hug, they were both feeling her pain and they needed each other just as much as she needed them. As long as they had each other they'd be okay. They went back inside and Lila was still asleep in Murphys bed, so the boys got into Connors, deciding to share and not make her uncomfortable. They had no idea what the next day would bring except for more heartache but they vowed to be as strong as they could for her. It was bad enough she was grieving, but to have found the body herself and then be placing the blame on herself, they knew it would be hard for them all to deal with. They just had to be there for each other, if they could do that then they could make it through.


	7. Chapter 7

**More sad feels, but it gets better.**

The next morning Connor woke before Murphy and Lila, he made a phone call into work, leaving a message to say he and his brother wouldn't be coming in. He explained about Lila or _'Murph and I's lass' _as he had called her and that they needed to spend the day with her to make sure she was alright. He knew it would have been taken as Lila was he and Murphy's girlfriend but he didn't care. The three of them may not have been romantically linked, but the twins both saw her as theirs. It even became an unspoken knowledge in the days she had worked at McGinty's. The men still looked at her, any lad with eyes would have, but they knew from how the twins were that she belonged to them and they'd never act on it. Murphy had said more than a few colourful words to some of the lads that had made some crude comments about the lass the night before her date after she had left, and put them well and truly in their place. As Murphy so eloquently put it, if any of them even tried to make a move on Lila, '_there won't be a single fuckin' bone in yer body that ain't broken, am I makin' meself clear lads?' _You always knew Murphy meant business when he used his low voice, it was downright menacing.

After Connor rang their work, he rang the bar, leaving a message for Aileen to say that Lila would need a few days off work and what had happened, he knew the woman would be understanding about it and he wondered if she had any advice for them to help Lila out. Next on the agenda was the lasses Ma. He didn't have her number though and the lass didn't have her bag for him to look through to see if he could find anything. He would have gone to her apartment, but he realised he and Murphy didn't actually know where it was. He didn't want to bother her about it, but he knew he'd have to talk to her when she woke up, he'd offer to make the call himself so she wouldn't get too upset.

When Murphy woke up, the pair didn't speak, they didn't want to wake the girl up. Connor made them a pot of coffee and some toast and they sat at the table eating and drinking silently, the pair glancing at the sleeping girl occasionally with sombre faces. They were dreading her waking up, knowing how upset she would be. They were both dressed in their usual jeans and black t shirts but didn't bother with their boots since they didn't plan on going anywhere just yet. A few hours passed and the girl was still out cold, they were worried but they figured she needed it, her mind and body had been through enough.

Rocco turned up at around dinner time, when he was free he'd sometimes go and see the twins at work and have lunch with them but when he went by he got told they were off, seeing to _their _girl. Connor took him out into the hall and explained what had happened and the usually happy man was gutted. He had met the girl once, the second day she had been in McGintys, before he had passed out. She was a lovely girl and the boys had done nothing but gush about her since they'd met her, he knew they both liked her and she was good for the pair of them.

"Aw fuck man, whys shit always gotta happen to good people?" He frowned, wiping a hand over his face as he looked at Connor. The fair haired twin looked like he hadn't slept and Rocco knew the boys would have been taking it hard. He offered to go and grab them some lunch and when he brought it back he got out of their hair. They ate their deli sandwiches quietly, leaving Lilas for when she would eventually wake up.

Mary felt a dull ache in her chest. She knew this was going to happen, her father had been sick for over a year, but it reminded her of the loss of her husband all over again and she was heartbroken for her poor little Delila. Her daughter had taken care of the man for a year, taking it upon herself to be his carer instead of going out and living her life, and she knew she would be taking it hard. When she turned up at her apartment, there was no answer, no noise from inside at all, and she was worried where her daughter might be given what her mental state would be. She went to McGinty's next, Lila had mentioned she worked there during one of their nightly phone calls and she hoped maybe she was there. Once again she came up empty handed when she saw no signs of her. After talking to the older barmaid though, she found out Lila had stayed the night with two brothers. She was concerned at first until Aileen assured her that there were no more virtuous boys than the MacManus twins and how they had helped her the day she came in for the first time soaked from the rain. She explained the three were close friends and Mary remembered her daughter talking about a Connor and Murphy, it turned out those were the brothers Aileen was talking about. Aileen gave her the directions to their place so she could see her daughter.

It wasn't in the best part of Southie and the building looked like illegal loft housing, but she didn't judge, hell her and her husband had lived in worse when they first arrived to the States. When she got to their door, she stopped to listen for a moment and she could hear voices inside.

"Lila love, please eat somethin', ye'll waste away." She heard one of them plead. Despite herself she smiled just a little, it was obvious they were trying to take care of her and that made her feel better about her being there.

"Lass, just take a bite, one bite aye?" The other asked sounding bordering on desperate. Her daughter didn't speak though and she was worried about how bad she was fairing in all of this. She raised her hand and knocked loudly, causing silence in the apartment.

"Fuck off Rocco, come back later!" One of them called out, she shook her head and smiled a little, knocking harder once again.

The door swung open as the dark haired boy was in mid sentence, a brooding scowl on his face.

"For fuck sake Roc, we just told ye-" His eyes widened when he saw her, it didn't take a genius to figure out who she was, she looked like an older version of Lila and the wild red hair was a dead giveaway. She almost laughed at his horrified expression.

"I'm sorry ma'am! I- I thought ye were someone else. Fuck...I mean...Shit. Sorry!" His eyes were as wide as saucers and he almost face palmed himself for being so fucking panicked by the woman. He looked like a little boy that had been scolded by his mother and she gave him a warm smile.

"Is Lila here sweetheart?" She asked kindly, her eyes flitting to behind him where she saw the blonde twin sat on a mattress next to Lila who was hugging her knees refusing to even look at him. The poor soul was holding a sandwich he was trying to offer her as she ignored him. Murphy blinked and nodded, letting her in and shutting the door. He felt like such an ass for swearing at her and he was glad she didn't seem mad about it. If anything, she looked almost amused.

When Connor saw her, he stood up and set the sandwich down, wiping a hand on his pants as he extended it to her and shook her hand.

"Nice te meet ye ma'am, I'm Connor, this is me brother Murphy, sorry about yer Da." He said softly with a furrowed brow. Upon looking at the boys it was clear they were tired and looked upset themselves and she wondered just how close the three of them were for them to be helping her so much and to be so affected by the loss.

"Thank you. Just call me Mary." She said softly, glancing to her daughter and furrowing her brow. Lila acted like she hadn't even heard her mother was there. Murphy went over, crouching next to the mattress and stroking the back of her head. Her hair was down now, Murphy had kindly taken all the pins out for her after she woke since her hands were shaking too badly to do it herself. She had also weakly asked for something to wear since her dress wasn't very comfortable and she was now wearing a pair of Connors sweatpants with one of Murphys shirts. She looked even smaller in them with how big they seemed on her.

"Lila m'girl, yer Ma's here." He whispered softly to her, although her mother caught it. She couldn't help but feel like there was more than friendship going on here but it made her happy. If she had found someone, she deserved it.

Lila peaked out from her arms and her mother's heart broke. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying so much and she looked utterly broken. Murphy stood and moved away, giving the pair some privacy. The boys stepped out for a smoke as Mary sat down on the mattress in front of her daughter. Lila launched herself at her, clinging onto her as she broke down once again. Her mother found herself crying too. They both knew this was coming, but it still hurt all the same.

"Oh Lila sweetheart, I'm so sorry." The thought of her daughter finding the body was heart clenching, she didn't think she'd be able to cope if it had been her.

"I'm sorry Ma, I'm so sorry. It's my fault, I shouldn't have gone out, I'm so sorry." Lila cried desperately, her voice slightly muffled in her mother's shoulder. Mary frowned and moved her away, giving her a stern look as Lila sniffled and wiped her eyes.

"Delila Marie Kelly, don't ye dare be blamin' yerself for this." She scolded, looking at her daughter concerned. Lila lowered her head and a weak sob left her lips.

"But Ma, he died alone." She whispered sadly, shaking her head.

"Now listen te me right now, ye know as well as I do that's how he would have wanted te go. He wouldn't have wanted ye te be there Lila, and ye know it. Ye couldn't have helped him any, it was his time. I don't want te hear ye blame yerself again. Got it?" She was firm but it was the tough love she needed, hearing that her mother didn't blame her was enough to ease some of the guilt that had burrowed into her heart and took residence there. She nodded and wiped her eyes, smiling weakly when her mother reached out and stroked her hair.

"What now?" Lila asked quietly.

"Don't worry about it, I'll make all the arrangements and I'll let ye know alright?" She pulled her in for another hug and Lila nodded as she clung to her. They hugged for a long while and when they moved apart, Mary looked at her daughter with a smile.

"So this is Connor and Murphy? They're handsome devils aren't they?" She asked trying to lighten the mood, giving Lila a knowing smile. Lila blushed furiously, snorting a little and lowered her head. She was glad her mother was acting normal, it gave her a semblance of normal despite her world being turned upside down.

"Ma, we're just friends." She whined a little, trying not to smile and failing.

"Uh huh, friends...that's why Murphy called ye his girl?" She asked with a smirk. Lila hadn't even noticed really. He called her love and m'girl all the time, she never read anything into it, just like when Connor called her sweetheart or constantly told her she was pretty. She leveled her gaze at her mother and Mary raised her hands in surrender jokingly.

"Alright, alright. Well either way, they have my seal o' approval. Not a lot o' girls are lucky enough te have a handsome Irish fella lookin' after them, let alone two." She smiled, making Lila blush again.

"Ma!" She scolded, swatting her mother's arm and making her chuckle.

"I have te get goin', start makin' arrangements, will ye be alright here?" She asked looking worried, taking Lilas hand and squeezing it.

"Yeah, they'll take care of me." She said with a weak smile. They both stood and Lila walked her over to the door. She was sad to see her mother go again but she would see her again soon enough, her presence had calmed her enough to bring her back from the brink of a very dark place.

"Chin up sweetheart, he wouldn't want ye mopin' about the place. And make sure ye eat the food the boys give ye, ye'll make yerself sick." She chided, being all motherly as always and Lila rolled her eyes playfully as she hugged her.

"Aye Ma." She snorted, making her mother chuckle. Mary was glad she had been able to help her daughter somewhat. It wasn't going to be easy and they still had the funeral to get to, but she knew they'd all be okay, her daughter had two very lovely men willing to help her through this incredibly dark time and she was grateful for that. They had to be okay, death was just a part of life. She'd learnt that the hard way when her husband was murdered.

They said their goodbyes and when she left, Lila sat back on the mattress, picking up her deli sandwich and eating some of it. She couldn't stomach much but she ate almost half of it. Not too long after she saw Murphy poke his head through the window, looking if the coast was clear, Lila almost laughed at how scared he actually looked of her mother.

"She's gone Murph." She said softly, making him look at her. His face brightened with a wide smile as he saw not only had she attempted to eat, but she looked a bit better. She wasn't crying and she was actually talking now, so it was a start. He climbed through the window with Connor in tow and they both sat on the bed with her. Murphy to her right and Connor in front of her.

"Ye look a bit better lass." Connor smiled at her, reaching out and holding her hand. She gave him a smile back and then looked to Murphy who was now twirling a long strand of her wavy hair around his fingers.

"Thank you both, for everything. I don't know what I would have done if it wasn't for you two." She said sincerely. Murphy gave her a small smile as his hands wound into the hair at the nape of her neck and she felt Connor squeeze her hand.

"Ain't a problem love. Like ye said te us, you bein' okay means more te us than anythin' else." Murphy grinned, looking at her through his lashes. They stayed in companionable silence for a moment before Connor spoke up.

"Murphy's scared o' ye Ma." He blurted, a shit eating grin on his face. Lila burst out laughing, she had seen his face when he was checking if she was gone and now it was confirmed.

"Fuck you! Ye weren't the one who swore at her like a dick." He huffed indignantly, glowering at his brother. Lila decided to have some fun and shot Connor a shot, he knew instantly what she was going to do and he had to bite his lip so he didn't laugh.

"You swore at my mother?" She asked, scowling at him and looking all hurt like. Murphy's eyes widened and he shook his head rapidly.

"Nay m'girl, t'wasn't like that I swear! I thought she was Rocco!" He looked more scared now than he had with her mother and she fought to keep a straight face.

"I thought we were friends Murphy and then you do this?!" She looked so offended that Connor almost gave her a standing ovation for her performance. He kept silent as he watched the horror on Murphys face at the thought of upsetting the wee lass after all she had been through.

"We are love! I said I was sorry t'her. Fuckin' Christ!" He was panicking now, his voice getting higher and he looked to Connor for help but he just shrugged.

"Lords name brother." He smirked, making Lila snort and give herself away. Murphys head whipped to her and he squinted at her. For a lass that was so offended a second ago she didn't look so much offended now. The look he gave her made her cave and she burst out laughing, Connor following suit.

"Fuckin' hell Murph! Ye should o' seen yer face! _T'wasn't like that I swear!_" He cackled delightfully as he mocked him, loving having someone to help him tease his _younger_ brother.

Murphy huffed and sat back against the wall with his broad arms crossed over his chest.

"Yeah, ha ha, very fuckin' funny." He grumbled as he sat there brooding. Lila stifled another laugh and scooted closer, lowering her head so she could look up at him, blinking her long lashes as she pouted. He tried not to give in but he wasn't fooling anyone, least of all himself. He flicked her lower lip gently and she yelped in shock, making Connor bark a laugh all over again. It was nice just laughing with them again, and she knew despite the ache in her chest and the loss she would never forget, she'd be okay in the end as long as she had these two goofs by her side.


	8. Chapter 8

**Funerals, drunkenness and revelations.**

It had been three days since Lila had last seen her mother, four since the awful night her grandfather had passed away. It was the day of the funeral and there was a sombre air in the boys apartment as they all got ready. She'd stayed at their place every night since. They offered to take her home and after she broke down, they realised she couldn't face being back there. They couldn't say they blamed her, they wouldn't want to be there either. So instead, the twins had graciously offered their place to her. She insisted she would find her own place and be out of their hair soon enough, but the boys found themselves hoping she wouldn't. They liked having her there all the time, they couldn't imagine the place without her now. They had gone the day prior to grab her things for her. She didn't have much and had no desire for the furnishings, she didn't want a reminder of the place she shared with her grandfather, instead they just brought her clothes and personal items in trash bags for her. The only other thing they had took was the couch after Lila had insisted, theirs was '_a pile of shit_' according to the girl, they couldn't deny it, and hers was new and practically unused. She was beyond grateful for their help. She'd called her landlord and told him she was moving out, he was more than accommodating since he knew what had happened and he even gave her the deposit back despite the fact the lease wasn't up. She'd been sleeping in Murphys bed, whilst the twins shared Connors. She never told them but she'd woke up a few times to see them cuddling and it made her smile. They bickered like children when they were awake but she could see when they were asleep how they needed each other, sought each other out. It was endearing. Not that she would ever tell them that.

She used the money from the deposit to buy a dress for the funeral and suits for the twins. They had flat out refused for her to pay for them so she checked the size of their clothes and bought them anyway. They'd given her a lecture about it but really they were grateful, there was no way they could have afforded it on their own. Her dress was a black long sleeve boat neck skater dress that came to her knees. She was wearing it with ankle boots with a small heel and some tights. She had her hair half pinned up and the boys wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked, but they couldn't bring themselves to. It was the day of the funeral, it didn't feel appropriate. The boys had simple suits, white shirts with black slacks and a black tie. Lila thought they looked handsome, but getting Murphy into a tie was proving harder than she thought.

"Hold still Murph, Jesus!" She scolded, trying to tie it for him since he had tried about 100 times and failed, much to his brothers amusement who was sitting at the table watching them both with a goofy grin.

"Lords name." Murphy muttered miserably, glowering at his laughing twin.

"Yeah Murph, hold still." Connor snorted, he was already dressed and ready to go and he had no issues with his tie. Although seeing the lass fawn all over Murphy trying to do his, he felt like maybe he should have feigned not being able to tie it.

"Come on Murphy, keep still!" She chided, squinting up at him as he wriggled around and tugged at the neck of his shirt.

"I'm fuckin' tryin' m'girl, feels like yer chokin' me." He huffed, although it came out more as a whine which only served to make his brother laugh even more. Murphy hated ties, their Ma used to have them wear them for mass every Sunday when they were younger. He hated them then and he hated them now. He would have just refused to wear one but he knew how much today meant to the girl and he wouldn't deny her this.

He finally stilled long enough for her to tie it and she smiled up at him as she smoothed it out. Feeling her hand stroke down his chest like that made his mouth dry up and he blinked down at her. She looked a fucking vision dressed up like this as she smiled up at him. Would it be so inappropriate to kiss her right then? The look Connor was giving him was a clear yes, of course the fucker knew what he was thinking, he was in his damn head. Instead he opted for a bright smile, it satisfied her enough that she returned it and moved away. Connor stood up and went over, wrapping her in a hug he knew she would need today. She melted into him, burrowing her face in his neck as she just let him soothe her. The twins had a way of calming her, their scent grounding her. He gave her a small smile when he moved away and she felt Murphy tug on her wrist, pulling her to him for another hug. She took comfort from him, the way his hand always went into her hair when he hugged her. They hugged so different yet each one was equally wonderful, she realised it was her new favourite thing, a MacManus hug.

They opted to walk to the church since it wasn't too far and when they got there she stood outside. She could feel the panic bubbling up in her chest as she stared at the church, she was willing her feet to move but they wouldn't. She'd been dealing with things alright the past few days. Only crying a handful of times when it hit her like a tonne of bricks. The boys had been there every step of the way. Their boss gave them a few days off to help her out and Aileen had told her to stay off for the rest of the week, she'd even brought over some casseroles for the trio. Lila couldn't imagine how different things would have been if she hadn't met the twins, having to go through this alone. She probably would have jumped off a damn bridge, as dramatic as it sounded. She wouldn't have been able to cope with this grief alone. She was broken out from her depressing thoughts by hands taking each of her own. She looked up to see the boys each holding a hand and looking at her sympathetically.

Suddenly her mother was walking down the steps of the church to greet them, she had seen the boys comforting her, holding her hands as she tried to gather herself and Mary had smiled to herself. When the boys noticed Lilas mother coming over, they dropped her hands quickly as if they feared the woman would smite them on sight.

"Ready sweetheart?" Mary asked softly. Lila nodded although her face told a different story. But she didn't have a choice, they'd be starting the service soon and she would kick herself later if she missed it. She took a shaky breath as the four of them walked in.

She sat between the boys on a pew and her mother sat to Connors left. The service was beautiful, they read sermons and some people got up to talk about the man everybody loved. She cried a fair few times but the boys were always on hand to help her. A tissue when she needed it, a reassuring squeeze of her hand. At one point Connor had even wrapped an arm around Lilas mother when she broke down and the older woman was grateful for the men. Before long the whole thing was over and Lila was in need of a fucking drink. It was hard to say goodbye to her granda, for it to feel so final. But she knew he wouldn't want her to just mope around, like her mother had told her. She needed to be strong for him, to honour his memory and to keep on living her life. She was just glad she had the twins by her side as she did it.

They were having a wake for the man at one of his friends houses but Lila decided not to go, she'd had too much for one day, she just wanted to go to McGinty's with the boys and drink, try to have a laugh. After saying goodbye to her mother, the three of them walked over to McGintys, the boys taking their ties off on the way and stuffing them in their pants pockets. Everyone in the bar knew about Lilas grandfather and when they got there, she got a lot of condolences and sympathy pats to the back. She was grateful. The little place was quickly becoming a safe space for her, it felt like home and she appreciated everyone there.

Rocco was already there and despite only meeting the man once, when he saw her, he grabbed her into a big bear hug that made her smile. She really liked him, he was like a big cuddly bear that made everyone laugh. The four of them sat in the booth, Murphy sitting to her right with Connor opposite her and Rocco opposite Murphy. Aileen had bought them a round of drinks saying they were on her, giving Lila a quick hug before she left. A few hours went by, Lila had been mostly quiet, letting the boys tell stories to cheer her up and Rocco's joined in, always the funny man. They hadn't had to pay for a single drink since the patrons of the bar were buying them rounds. Lila was never one for getting drunk, but she felt like today called for it. Connors leg kept brushing against her own and if her brain wasn't soaked with alcohol she would have blushed and wondered why it kept happening, she hadn't even registered Murphy's arm wrapped around her waist or how his hand rested on her hip, his thumb rubbing circles every so often.

She was more than a little tipsy, as were the boys as they all laughed at the story Connor was telling about a 14 year old Murphy. The twins had opened the first few buttons of their shirts at this point, their sleeves rolled up a little and Murphy's hair was more unruly than usual somehow.

"- and so Murphy here decided t'was a grand idea te raid Ma's whiskey stash and drank more than a half a bottle te himself. The poor wee babe was sick as a dog and threw up everywhere. Ma rained holy hell on him, and he tried te fuckin' tell her I made him do it!" Connor looked downright offended like he was reliving it, his hands gesturing wildly as he told the story.

"Aye but she didnae fuckin' believe me since ye could never do no wrong!" Murphy huffed next to her, his accent stronger since he was drunk, making her snort at his indignant scowl at his brother. Rocco was laughing his ass off next to Connor.

"That's because I was an angel, not like you, ye fuckin' devil." Connor cackled. Lila hid her laugh behind her hand as she glanced to Murphy who took another shot, squinting at his twin.

"Are you sure you're Irish man? Sure keep lettin' the side down." Rocco teased with a wide grin, making Connor actually fall out of the booth with laughter at Murphy's thoroughly offended face. It caused all of them to roar with laughter as Connor tried to get himself up and failed.

"Serves ye fuckin' right ye _eejit_!" Murphy howled with laughter.

"Oh it's alright, don't all get up te help at once!" Connor snorted, giving up and just laying there. Lila was laughing so hard she had tears in her eyes as she slid out of the booth. She grabbed Connor arm and tried to lift him but he was a dead weight.

"Maybe we should just drag him home by his feet." She sniggered as she swayed where she stood and looked at Murphy. They all dissolved into fits of laughter again. They were all wasted.

"Ah, fuckin' hell m'girl, we need te get home before we all pass out." Murphy chuckled as he got out of the booth, followed by Rocco.

"Up ye get _deartháir (_brother_)_." Murphy snorted as he and Rocco hauled Connor up to his feet. He was fine once he was upright, only staggering a little.

After some great drunk hugs from Rocco, the trio set off back home. Murphy had his arm wrapped around her waist and Connor had his around her shoulder. They were singing obnoxiously some Irish songs as Lila laughed. The three of them swaying and staggering as they went. She felt a warmth spread through her body and it wasn't just from the copious amounts of alcohol she had consumed. The boys made her so fucking happy, even on a day like this. They were completely piss drunk and when they got inside, they all shed their clothing without even realising it. The twins just in their boxers and Lila just in her panties and bra. They all collapsed in a tangle of limbs in Connors bed, Lila in the middle of them both. The last thing she registered was Murphy nuzzling the side of her face.

"_Je t'aime, notre douce fille _(Love you, our sweet girl)." He purred softly. She thought it was French, it sounded like it, but she had no idea, she didn't speak French.

"_Dormi bene, bella ragazza, ti amo _(Sleep well beautiful girl, love you)." Connor muttered softly as he kissed her cheek, in Italian maybe? She didn't have a chance to respond, not that it would have mattered anyway. They were all out within seconds, completely passed out, it was a good job Murphy got them to go home when they did.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hangovers are a bitch.**

Lila groaned when she woke in the morning, unable to even open her eyes. Her head was pounding away from an epic hangover and she knew if she opened her eyes, the tiny amount of light in the apartment would kill her, literally. She would just die. Burst into flames and turn to dust. So she would much rather lay there with her eyes closed. She felt like she was in between two furnaces and she vaguely remembered falling into bed with the twins the night before and passing out. She might have felt a tad self-conscious about her lack of clothing in the middle of the boys, but she was too hungover to care. Her mouth was as dry as the desert and her head was beyond painful. She was lay on her stomach, facing her left. Over her shoulder to her right, one of the twins was snoring like a buzz saw. She groaned again at the noise and the twin to her left tightened their arm around her middle, the hand precariously close to her ass. But again, she couldn't find it in her to care.

"It feels like there's a tiny man in my head using a sledgehammer to escape." She whined pitifully, eliciting a pained groan from her left.

"Christ love, do ye have te be so loud?" Murphy grumbled, sounding every bit as pitiful as she did. His head was thumping away and he was half asleep, he only just registered that the girl was in bed with him and his brother, and when he cracked open an eye, wincing at the pain that the light shot through his skull, he noticed how the blanket was kicked off them all and she was only in her underwear. His hand twitched as he glanced and saw it right above her ass and he swallowed thickly, closing his eyes. He was already sporting some impressive morning wood and this certainly didn't help matters, he didn't want Lila to think he was a fucking creep. She seemed unfazed though by the tangle of limbs and lack of underwear, and Murphy wondered if maybe there was some hope for the three after all.

"I need Coffee Murphhh. Are there such things as coffee fairies? I need one right now." She whined again, pouting even with her eyes shut. Murphy couldn't help but smile at her pretty face and huffed a small laugh. He took a chance and stroked his thumb in soothing circles on her lower back and she hummed softly, enjoying the feeling. It was nice and comforting. She tried to shift a little, laying on her stomach all night had made her ache and her hips were stiff. She tried to turn around but Connor was half lay on her and pinned her to the bed. Murphy offered no help, watching her amused as she wriggled and tried to free herself, but it was no use.

"Murph, help." She pleaded weakly, finally opening her eyes and sticking her lower lip out at him, making him chuckle. He looked like an angel in the low light of the loft, his hair all messy and a sleepy grin on his face. It wasn't helping that his hand was still so close to her ass, it was making her head go to some pretty interesting places.

Murphy sat up, holding his head a little at the motion and waiting for the room to stay still. He reached a hand between the girl and Connor and grabbed his nipple, twisting it harshly. A very unmanly yelp left the lighter haired twin as he jumped and fell off the mattress. Murphy burst out laughing and Lila rolled onto her back propped up by the pillows, glancing at him sheepishly as she bit her lip to stifle her own laugh. She didn't know Connor was capable of making such a noise.

"The fuck was that for?!" She was also unaware Connors voice could get so high, but they all winced at the tone that made their heads ring. Connor was holding the offending nipple like he was afraid it would fall off.

"Ye were squashin' the poor girl, she's only a wee thing, ye wanna break her?" Murphy asked, gesturing to the very underdressed lass in their bed.

She was lay on her back and the blankets were god knows where, but she seemed not too fussed about the lack of clothes. The best bits were covered after all, she didn't need to be too shy, it wasn't like they even thought of her that way. Connor looked at her and blinked for a moment as his half-asleep brain tried to catch up with himself. He had drank a little more than the others and he had no recollection of how they all ended up in bed together almost naked. He tore her eyes from her body, afraid he was staring as she watched him amused and then looked to Murphy. Murphy could tell he was panicking, he knew exactly what he was thinking and he decided it was an opportune moment for some fun.

"Don't tell me ye fuckin' forgot what happened last night Connor." Murphy chided, trying his best to look stern, even as he felt Lila look at him confused. Realisation crossed her face and he could see the fight not to laugh all over her face.

"What...what ye mean? What happened?" Connor asked warily. If he'd slept with her he would kick himself for taking advantage when she was drunk, that and also for being too drunk to even remember it.

"Christ Connor, ye sleep with the poor lass and then ye forget?!" Murphy scowled, making Connors' eyes widen as his eyes flit to Lila and then back to Murphy. Lucky for Connor, Murphy wasn't very good at keeping a straight face and he was soon put out his misery as his brother burst out laughing, Lila following suit. Connor frowned for a moment before his brain clicked and then he narrowed his eyes at the pair.

"That wasn't very fuckin' nice was it?" He huffed, glaring at the pair. Lila sat up, the boys secretly enjoying the view as she did.

"Don't worry Connor, if you'd have slept with me, you definitely wouldn't forget it." She smirked, patting his face cheekily before standing up and going over to the toilet. There was a screen there now that she had bought to protect her modesty whilst she stayed with the twins, she had no desire to use the toilet in front of them, even with Murphy's spiel about '_we've all gotta go, ain't no sense in bein' shy about it'_. Connors jaw almost hit the floor at her bold words and Murphy looked equally stunned before he burst out laughing again. The boys and her would often flirt playfully, but Lila didn't think it meant anything since she was convinced the twins would never like her that way, she wasn't near pretty enough for either of them. She felt like she could say things that would normally come across as bold and too forward, simply because to her it wasn't meant to be taken seriously. The boys always knew she was just teasing, it was usually pretty obvious and they thought she didn't see them as more than friends so they never read anything into it, but she had never mentioned anything about sleeping with them, she had never been this bold before. Connor was a little confused but Murphy sat there with a smirk. Her words combined with how at ease she was in bed with the pair, even undressed, it had given him hope that maybe she would be up for something more than friendship. He wanted to talk to Connor alone when he got a minute. It wasn't like they could just throw her in bed and ravage her, they'd test the waters so to speak, take their flirting up a notch and see how she took it.

Lila came back from behind the screen and padded over to the kitchen, two sets of eyes watching her every move like she was the most entertaining thing to watch. Lila in her skimpy black underwear. She washed her hands before turning around and looking at them both.

"So, can we get coffee? Because I think I might die without it." She snorted. Murphy barked out a laugh as he stood, his brother following suit.

"Bit dramatic arent ye lass?" Connor smirked at her amused, making her smile innocently at him. They all got dressed and it was almost comical how they matched. Black t-shirts and jeans. Lila threw on her hoodie whilst the boys donned their black peacoats. They made their way to the diner down the street because Connor told her '_There's nothin' like a big fuckin' greasy breakfast te cure a hangover'. _When they got there, they got to a booth, but Lila opted to sit opposite the twins rather than next to them and they looked almost offended at the absurdity of it, like she'd sat on another table entirely and not just across from them. After the waitress took their orders, Murphy couldn't help but ask her, he looked like he was about to burst at the seams if the words didn't leave his lips.

"The fuck ye doin' way over there?" He grumped, looking like a child that had his favourite toy taken away. Connor snorted a little at his tone, but then glanced to her curiously. He was also wondering why she hadn't sat right next to them like she would at the bar. He just wasn't immature enough to voice it like his little brother.

"Hmm… well I wanted to enjoy the view." She smirked, making the boys sit up a little, she could practically see their chests puff up with pride and she couldn't resist fucking with them.

"I mean, he's pretty hot right?" She asked, gesturing to the man sat at the other side of the diner. The twins' faces were priceless. First shock colouring them before they glowered as they turned to look at said man, who in Murphy's eyes was as good as dead just for existing in that moment. But when they turned around, the only other guy in the diner looked about 90 and they whipped their heads to look back at her as she burst into a fit of the giggles.

"Oh my God, it's way too easy to fuck with you two." She laughed, looking more than pleased with herself. Connor shook his head, he couldn't believe the lass got one over on him, and Murphy squinted at her.

"Lords name m'girl, wouldn't want the good Lord te come smite ye for bein' a _naughty_ _lass_." He glared intensely at her. His voice was low but it wasn't his scary voice. It was a voice she'd never heard him use, it was commanding and honestly, incredibly fucking sexy. She blinked dumbly at him for a minute, her cheeks flushing as his tone had affected her so badly and Connor leant back in the booth watching her with interest at how she had reacted. Her pupils were bigger and her breathing was faster. If he didn't know any better, he'd say the little lass was turned on by how his brother had spoken to her. Very fucking interesting indeed.

He knew Murphy thought the same thing as a sly smirk spread across his face as he still watched her, his gaze intense and unwavering as he looked at her through his lashes. He felt inexplicably smug at the unexpected effect he had on her, like she was unraveling before his very eyes. He wondered just how she would react if he told her all of the delicious things he wanted to do to her but Connor nudged him with his foot. Connor gave him a pointed look. The girl clearly got affected by Murphy's words but now she was looking at the table, almost embarrassed and shy. A look he'd never seen on the girl. Connor knew Murphy was pushing his luck taking this too far and Murphy just rolled his eyes and sighed. He crossed his arms as he looked back to the girl and he felt a little bad to have embarrassed her. He didn't want her to be uncomfortable, there was nothing wrong with being turned on. Hell, she worked him and Connor up every day just by existing.

"Ye in work today lass?" Connor asked, trying to get back on track and make things normal. Lila looked at him, brought out of her thoughts and smiled. It seemed like the boys were not aware of how Murphy's words had affected her and she was grateful, she was more than happy to pretend it hadn't happened.

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna go in. I can't just lay around moping every day. It'll be good to get back there. Besides, it's Friday and I wouldn't want Aileen on her own when it's so busy." She said softly, making him nod. Aileen had become a sort of mother away from home figure for her, she knew it would be busy tonight at the bar. The waitress brought the coffee and food over and Lila sipped the coffee gingerly since it was still hot.

"Does she count as yer coffee fairy?" Murphy teased, nodding over to the waitress. Lila snorted and looked at him.

"Hmm...I think she might." She smirked.

The trio ate greedily, and Connor was indeed right. It helped immensely for the hangover, as did the coffee. The three all walked back to the apartment feeling content. Lila was still thinking about how Murphy had affected her at the diner. She wasn't stupid, she knew she was attracted to the boys, hell, she wasn't just attracted to them, she liked them. And she knew it was stupid since they would never like her that way. But no one had ever made her react that way before with just a tone of voice. She tried to push it out of her mind. She knew work would be a welcome distraction. It would be business as usual now. The boys still had until Monday before they had to go back to work and she was excited about spending so much time with them. She knew they'd be at the bar with her and walk back with her. She would pretty much spend every moment with them as she had been doing since she started staying at their place. She just couldn't wait for things to go back to normal now.


	10. Chapter 10

**What's this you ask? Two chapters in one day? Yes, I'm feeling generous lolololol.**

**Shit hits the fan when Lila finds out what the twins have been telling people about her, and it's only about to get worse.**

**Fun fact; the pronunciation of deartháir, which is Irish for brother, sounds a lot like **_**jeheart**_ **in the Munster dialect which is what I'm going off. I'm actually learning Irish myself since I'm half Irish and have a lot of Irish family! **

It was Friday once again, the week had flown by. The three of them had settled into a routine quite easily and the boys were shocked at how at ease they were with her living there. They'd never had the need or want for a lass to live with them. They'd never been in a serious relationship and it had just been the two of them, they had liked it that way. Yet Lila was different. They weren't even together yet she fit in well with the twins like she had always been there. It was hard to remember what their life was like before she came into it. They actually enjoyed having her there and getting to see her every day.

The boys had been back at work since Monday and Lila was working every night. She spent the time when the boys were at work to clean the place. She'd bake and cook, much to the brothers' delight. She'd make cookies, cakes and all sorts of goodies that they thoroughly fucking enjoyed and they always came home to a home-cooked meal. They couldn't believe how lucky they were. She'd even started making them lunches to take to work which was fucking adorable. They usually just had a power bar which wasn't exactly healthy since their work was so labour intensive, or occasionally Rocco would bring them lunch and eat with them. Sometimes she'd write little jokes for them and put them in the bags to make them smile, and they fucking loved it, especially if they were having a rough day. It was insane how she was able to make them smile and feel unbelievably fucking happy when she wasn't even with them.

After dinner, they'd all go to the bar so she could work and the boys hung out with Rocco, then after work they'd all come back home and chill out or sleep. She'd gone back to sleeping in Murphys bed, and the boys wished she hadn't but wouldn't bring it up and make her feel uncomfortable. Everything was going really well for the three of them and they all worked well together like a well-oiled machine. Even Rocco loved her, she was hilarious and teased the boys relentlessly which he found more than amusing. She could clearly give as good as she got. He knew just why the boys were smitten with her. He just wished they'd fucking tell her because it was driving him insane. They were always gushing about her and it was almost sickening. Shit got out of hand when Murphy told him ' _and we came home and she was paintin' her toenails, she's got the cutest fuckin' toes.' _That comment had earned him a punch to the arm off his hairy friend and a roar of laughter from Connor, Murphy knew he deserved it as soon as the words left his mouth, who the fuck thinks toes are cute? Even Connor thought that one was ridiculous.

The bar was busy since it was Friday, over the weekend seemed to be the busiest time at the bar with a lot of other people coming in for a good night out, not just the regulars. It was good for business, but the boys hated it. The unspoken rule of McGinty's was that Lila belonged to them, despite their lack of a relationship status. So the men could look, and boy did they fucking look. Murphy was always ready to fucking pounce when he was at the bar with her. But they couldn't touch, and they wouldn't ever dream of it. The regulars were not stupid enough to want to piss off the MacManus boys. The kind and sweet boys could be downright scary when they wanted to be and the men had seen them in enough bar fights to know not to cross them. But on Fridays and Saturdays, it wasn't just the locals there, there were many men unaware of this rule, nor would they care. And that is exactly what lead Connor and Murphy to be sat in a booth with Rocco, staring daggers at a man at the bar.

Lila was having a good day, and she was more than pleasantly surprised when one of the new men in the bar had sat down and chatted away to her. He looked like a young Johnny Depp and he was charming as hell. It was obvious he was flirting with her and she was soaking it all up, loving every second of it. She hoped by the end of the night they would have exchanged numbers. The boys had been sat at the bar at the start of the night, but they moved to a booth with Rocco in hopes they could hear the conversation between Lila and the asshole, but they couldn't. Being in the booth meant she could no longer come over and chat with them like she had been doing but people were in their seats at the bar now so they couldn't very well move back. So instead they sat there brooding, with Lila unaware of the glares being sent their way.

"The fuck does he think he's doin' touchin' up on her like that?!" Murphy hissed, ready to launch off the seat and throw the man through the window. Connor pursed his lips as he watched them carefully. He wanted to make the man leave her alone but he didn't know how without upsetting Lila. He was trying to think of a way. He wasn't irrational or impulsive like his darker-haired counterpart. He was meticulous and calculating, always needing a plan first.

"Touchin' up on her? He just touched her fuckin' arm man!" Rocco laughed incredulously, shaking his head. He couldn't believe these two asshats.

"Still fuckin' touched her though." Connor grumbled, his eyes never leaving Lila and the man.

"And what? She's single, she can talk to who she wants." Rocco knew he was heading in dangerous territory, but his meaning was loud and clear. You want her? Fucking tell her. The boys shot a dark look his way and he shook his head and shut up, watching as their glare returned to the man in question.

"Fuck, I'm gettin' another drink." Rocco sighed, getting up and walking to the bar next to Lila and the man.

"Hey Roc! What can I get you?" She beamed at him. He smiled back, unable not to. Lila was gorgeous and she had a way about her that just made you like her.

"Just a beer sweetie." He grinned. She trotted off to get his beer and he was awkwardly left with the man that he feared would be murdered by the end of the night if he didn't leave.

"Hey, I'm Maddox." The man smiled with a nod, wanting to introduce himself since he was obviously friends with Lila.

"Hey man, Rocco." He replied, feeling more and more awkward by the second.

"So, what's up with your friends? They've been staring daggers at me for like an hour." He chuckled, motioning to the twins who were sat up tense and ready to fucking throw punches.

"Uh...yeah...well...the thing is...them and Lila...well they're kind of… a thing." He rambled nervously. But when the man's eyes widened he knew he said too much.

"What? The three of them? They're in a relationship?" He asked incredulously, the idea of it absurd to him. Rocco frowned, not knowing what to say and being annoyed by the man. He didn't think it was so weird if the three got together, to each their own and all that shit.

"Well, I mean...technically they're not together." He stated, fidgeting a little and looking for Lila so she could rescue him from this hell.

"So they're just friends? That doesn't explain the looks." Maddox squinted, feeling like something was amiss and he didn't like it.

"Look man, I'm not here for a fuckin' interrogation alright? Lila belongs to them, just fuckin' remember it." Rocco scowled. Maddox didn't have time to respond as Lila came back with a beer and a smile on her face, unaware of what was going on. Rocco gave her a weak smile as he handed over the money.

Maddox was frowning and got up, putting on his coat. Lila looked at him curiously, he was suddenly going cold on her and she wondered what she had done.

"You're leaving?" She sounded so genuinely sad that Rocco grimaced. He felt bad for the poor girl.

"Yeah well, wouldn't want your _boyfriends_ beating me up since you belong to them and all." He spat at her before leaving. She had visibly recoiled from his words and she felt like she'd been punched in the gut. She looked the Rocco confused but his guilty face made her narrow her eyes.

"Rocco, what the fuck did you say to him?" She asked lowly. Rocco squirmed a little and wiped a hand over his face.

"Don't fuckin' kill me, please. It's just… he asked why the boys were glarin' at him, so I told him." He winced, looking at her curiously.

"You told him what?... Wait a minute, you told him they're my boyfriends and I _belong_ to them?!" She asked incredulously. Rocco lowered his head, he had the decency to look guilty.

"Well yeah but only because it's the truth. Everyone here in McGinty's knows not to go near you, the boys put the fear of fuckin' God in them." He replied weakly. Lila furrowed her brows as everything clicked into place. Her first night working here, everyone was handsy and she got flirted with a lot, after that no one spoke to her unless it was for an order or some friendly chat. She wouldn't have minded so much but there had been a few guys her age in here that she had tried to talk to and they all brushed her off. She had thought it was her and it hurt her self esteem but now she knew that for some fucking reason, the boys had stopped anyone talking to her. She was livid.

She stormed around the bar and marched over to their booth. They boys had relaxed since the man left but seeing Lila storming over looking murderous, made them sit up straight and look at her warily. They had never seen Lila angry before and they were completely unaware of hurricane Lila that was about to tear the fucking place down.

"Outside. Now." She growled as she got to their table, she didn't wait and just stormed outside. The twins looked to each other, terrified of what she might say, what Rocco had clearly said to her to make her so mad at them and they got up and hesitantly went outside.

As soon as the door closed behind them she whirled to face them.

"How fucking dare you! I thought we were friends!" She yelled, her chest heaving as she pinned them with such an intense glare. Murphy frowned looking confused and Connor tilted his head. Neither of them made a move to get closer to her, fearing how she would react when she was so worked up.

"We are Lila-" Connor started, but he was cut off.

"Really?! Then how come I've just been informed that you've been scaring off guys from talking to me? How apparently I _belong_ to you!" She seethed. She started pacing and Murphy couldn't help but think she looked like a caged animal ready to attack and honestly, he was scared shitless.

"Love, we can explain-" Murphy tried, but again was unsuccessful.

"What gives you two the fucking right?! As my friends! To fucking decide who I do or do not talk to?!" She was furious and the twins knew they fucked up big time. She was right. They had no right doing that to her, they weren't even in a relationship.

"M'girl please." Murphy pleaded, wanting her to calm down and listen to them, to see if they could fix it.

"I'm not your girl!" She spat bitterly, making Murphy take a step back like he had been physically struck. The words hurt him more than he liked and it felt like his heart was being ripped from his chest.

She was so mad she couldn't see how upset Murphy had become, she was too enraged at the audacity that these two assholes had done this. She had trusted them wholeheartedly, and they betrayed her trust. To go behind her back and make out like they were together, to lay some sort of claim on her. To stop people talking to her, stop her having potential dates. They were her friends, they should be happy for her if people wanted to ask her out. Connor grabbed Murphy by the back of the neck, grounding him and trying to soothe him. He knew those words were seeping into his brother's heart like poison but as much as he hated to admit it, the lass was right. It was clear now how selfish they had been, they hadn't thought about how it would affect her, they were only thinking of themselves. He was trying to think of a way to fix it, his mind going through everything to try and repair the damage they had caused. She didn't trust them now and he didn't blame her. But it was never their intention to hurt her. He wasn't sure just what to say to her to make it right, not when she was so mad and didn't want to hear any of it.

"Lila, lass, we didn't mean te hurt ye I swear." Connor begged, looking desperately at her.

"Right, of course not. Why did you fucking do it? We're supposed to be friends! It's not like you're interested in me that way anyway, what do you care if I talk to guys!" She yelled, her arms swinging around wildly.

"We do." Murphy whispered, his voice strained as he tried to contain his hurt and tears. Lila looked at him like he'd grown three heads.

"What?" She asked, frowning as she looked between the boys. Murphy just lowered his head, he couldn't look at her, her words were ripping a hole through his chest and leaving a gaping hole.

"We do like ye like that lass, we couldn't stand the thought of ye bein' with another man." Connor admitted, grimacing at how it sounded to his own ears. They had been so selfish. So fucking selfish. She scoffed and looked at them incredulously. All this time she liked them and she never thought they'd like her back, yet here they were admitting it after they broke her trust and hurt her.

"You know, if you would have just told me that instead of being assholes, things would have been different." She stated, looking more hurt than angry now. Murphy looked up blinking at her, it just made him hurt more. She basically just admitted she felt the same and would have been willing to give it a go, but they'd fucked it up. Connor looked at her pained, wiping a hand over his face frustrated.

"It's doesn't have te be different Lila, we can-" He started, hoping she would listen.

"I'll get my things after work and go to a motel." She shook her head, looking at them both with so much hurt and sadness on her face that it made the boys hearts ache in their chests. She stormed past them and went back inside. Murphy felt like he was crumbling. Her words were eating away at him as they were on a painful loop in his mind and he could feel the tears sting his eyes. '_I'm not your girl, I'm not your girl, I'm not your girl.'_ Connor was looking at the door that the girl had gone through, trying desperately to think of what he needed to do to make things right, he couldn't lose her, they couldn't lose her. He needed to fix it and quick.

"Connor..." Murphy's voice broke the silence, he sounded utterly devastated and broken, his voice cracking a little. Connor whipped around to look at his brother and his heart clenched seeing the unshed tears and the look of heartbreak all over his face. His poor little Murphy always wore his heart on his sleeve and it didn't take much to upset him. But the boys had never actually cared about a lass before and this kind of heartache was new for them and he knew Murphy wasn't handling it well.

"Aye, c'mere _deartháir_ (brother)." He sighed, pulling him in for a hug. Murphy clung to him like a lifeline, burying his face in his brother's neck and letting his scent soothe him. He squeezed his eyes shut, willing the lump in his throat to go away.

After a few moments, Murphy had calmed enough to move away, sniffling slightly and wiping his eyes. Connor wrapped an arm around his shoulder and started walking them home. It wouldn't do any good to go back in the bar. Lila wouldn't want to see them and he wanted to think of a way to get her to stay. It wasn't safe for her to just go off and stay in some shady motel, he needed to sort this mess out. It was their own faults and they were atoning for their sins now, but he hoped to God they wouldn't lose the lass because they needed her. Seeing how devastated Murphy was, he wasn't sure how his brother would take it if she just never spoke to them again. Connors own heart ached at the thought. The girl was meant to be with them, even if it was just as friends.


	11. Chapter 11

**A pretty long angst and hurt filled chapter for you lovelies. It's super long but I couldn't find a good spot to split it into two chapters without breaking the intensity or the flow of it.**

**Murphy can't control his anger and he fucked up big time. Can they come back from this?**

**Warnings for intense rage filled Murphy.**

**Also, don't kill me lolololol.**

The boys were sat at their table in only their boxers. It was midnight now but Lila was yet to come home to get her stuff and the boys were getting anxious. She got off work an hour ago and they knew it didn't take that long to get to theirs from McGinty's. They'd both been smoking like chimneys and Murphy stood up, pacing a little as he chewed his thumb.

"What if she's hurt or somethin'? ...Or murdered?! Christ Connor, what if she's been fuckin' murdered?!" Murphy practically screeched, his mind running away with him with reasons why she hadn't turned up yet. Connor looked at him incredulously for even saying such a thing out loud and he shook his head.

"Fuckin' hell Murph! It's more likely she just didn't wanna see us and went te the motel without her stuff." He replied, intending to be somewhat comforting but as he heard his own words, his blood ran cold. Murphy looked horrified at the notion she couldn't stand to even see them for long enough to get her stuff. There was also the realization that if what Connor had said was the truth, then what Murphy had suggested could have happened. The only motel around was shady as hell and it was full of criminals. They'd kill you just for your fucking shoes.

Connor stood up with the intention of getting dressed so they could go and look for her, since he was now worried something had happened to her too, but the door to the loft opened. Lila walked in with Rocco in tow and the twins were relieved that not only was she safe, but that Rocco had walked her back. Rocco felt like it was the least he could do. He knew the whole thing wasn't his fault, he knew the twins shouldn't have done it in the first place and he had actually told them that a few times. But it was him that opened his big mouth and opened the huge can of worms. After the twins had left, Lila had continued to work with a face like thunder, a far cry from the smiley barmaid everyone was used to and everyone there knew something had gone down. He had graciously offered to walk her home and she gladly accepted. She hadn't walked back to the twins' place on her own before and it wasn't in the best part of Southie.

Rocco hadn't expected the girl to burst into tears halfway there. She had been mostly quiet and emotionless, but when he warily asked her if she was okay, it was like the dam broke and she started crying. He felt awkward as shit, crying girls weren't his thing, but he made an exception for the girl. Lila was his only girl friend, and she was sweet and caring. She didn't deserve to feel so upset about this and he knew she didn't have anyone else because the only other people she trusted were the reason why she was crying in the first place. He understood why the twins did what they did, it didn't make it right, he knew they were just overprotective and incredibly jealous. But he knew it was shitty of them, and after her basically pouring her heart out to Rocco, he'd learnt that she valued honesty above all else, and that twins lying to her, keeping this from her and pulling a move like that, it cut her pretty badly. She told him how the constant rebuffs she was getting made her feel self-conscious, how she just wanted to be happy. She told him how she felt about the boys and how sad she was that they didn't just tell her, and that just fucked him off. He told those two knuckleheads to tell her and all of this could have been avoided. She felt like they had gone behind her back, because they had, and she felt like she was the butt of some kind of joke, with everyone at her place of work thinking she _belonged_ to them when they were just friends.

Rocco tried to tell her they didn't mean to hurt her, that their stupid hearts were in the right place, but she said she needed time, and he knew it was only fair. They stopped her having fun, living her life and being happy all because they were selfish and wanted all of her attention. He hoped it would work out with them all, because despite what happened, they were really good together. Connor and Murphy had always been a package deal, and Lila had somehow managed to become a part of that now. Rocco felt almost stuck in the middle because the boys were his best friends, but at the same time, what they did was wrong and he had grown to care about Lila himself. She was one of his best friends too now and he hated seeing her so cut up about all of this.

After crying and baring her soul to the hairy man, she returned back to being mad and they made their way back. Lila was dreading seeing them again, she knew she needed some space to think and clear her head. She knew the boys, she knew deep down that they wouldn't have done it out of spite, but they still did it and it was fucked up. Like they were forcing some kind of relationship status on her she didn't even have. Stopping her from being able to even have a pleasant conversation with guys she might like as if they were her boyfriends, but they weren't. They could have just told her how they felt, it would have made her happy since she liked them, but instead they chose not to but still tell everyone she was theirs. It made her feel almost like they didn't want her to see anyone else but they didn't like her enough to be with them officially, like she wasn't good enough for them and that stung like a fucking bitch.

She didn't look at the twins as she breezed past them, grabbing a trash bag and starting to stuff her clothes inside of it. Rocco was stood near the door awkwardly, he had offered to walk her to the motel, he knew what types frequented the place and he wasn't happy with her going alone. He felt like the twins would be mad at him, he felt guilty for opening his big mouth. But Connor gave him a pat to the back and he relaxed, knowing they weren't upset with him. The twins knew this was their doing. They had no one to blame but themselves. Connor stood near the table watching forlornly as she packed her stuff, he was struggling to come up with anything to make her stay. He wasn't above begging at this point, though he doubted she would listen when she was so mad at them.

"Lila lass, please don't do this. At least wait 'til the mornin', t'isn't safe this late." Connor pleaded, sounding more than desperate. She didn't even acknowledge his words though as she continued gathering her things. She had heard him though, and she wouldn't admit it to them but she was scared. She didn't want to go to some seedy motel or go out this late, not after what happened to her father. But she was too mad to see sense and to back down.

Murphy watched and with each item she put in her bag, his anger increased. He often found his negative emotions too confusing or difficult to deal with, so they twisted into anger. Because anger he could deal with. Connor started to feel it, like an impending sense of doom as Murphy's temper started to flare up and rear its ugly head, and he glanced to his twin warily. Murphy's chest was heaving, his jaw clenched as he glared at the poor girl so hard Connor swore she would burst into flames. But before he could go over to him, Murphy pounced like a fucking lion. He ripped the bag from her hand so hard, she yelped and it flew across the room, the clothes scattering about like fucking confetti.

"Murph!" Connor yelled, appalled at his brother who was now backing the lass up to the wall, his chest puffed out as he pinned her with such an intense stare, she could do nothing but blink up at him. Her back hit the wall and she squinted at him defiantly.

"Connor told ye te do somethin', so ye better damn well do it _girl_." He spat at her, making her eyes widen just a fraction in shock that he had the fucking cheek to talk to her like that.

"I'm not a fucking dog asshole, I don't take orders from anyone." She snapped with a glare. His fists were clenched by his side and his nostrils flared as he towered over her.

"If ye think for one fuckin' second I'm gonna let ye out the fuckin' door at this time, ye need te get yer fuckin' head checked woman." He growled at her, tapping her temple to enunciate his point, making her smack his hand away with a glare. Connor was more than alarmed that he was using his menacing voice on Lila, it was enough to make a grown man shit his pants and tuck tail and run. But much to his surprise, Lila just sneered at him and gave him a little shove. It didn't move him though but now they were stood chest to chest, looking like they were about to start beating seven shades of shit out of each other and Connor didn't know how things had fucking got to this point. Rocco watched the standoff with wide eyes, he didn't know what the fuck was happening but he was scared, the energy in the loft had become incredibly dark and dangerous.

"Murphy, fuckin' cut it out!" Connor scolded as he walked over and tried to move Murphy but he got pushed away by a firm hand, yet Murphy never wavered from glaring at the girl with fire blazing behind his blue eyes.

"And what the fuck are you gonna do Murphy? Lock me in here?" She asked sarcastically with a quirked brow, seemingly unaffected by Murphy's attempt at intimidating her, it made his nostrils flare. Connor looked between the pair worried shitless, the lass really didn't know what she was dealing with when Murphy was like this. She was playing with fire. He'd never noticed just how similar his brother and the lass were, how stubborn they were and unable to back down. Murphy had never laid his hands on a woman, and Connor didn't think he ever would. But with how he was acting, there was slight doubt creeping into his head. Murphy scoffed, shaking his head bitterly. He bumped his chest into her a little, making her back hit the wall again.

"Ye know, that sounds like a _grand_ fuckin' idea." He sneered at her. He moved away and walked over to the fridge, grabbing the key. Lila knew too well this was the _only_ key because the boys had told her as such. They never locked the door when they all left, simply because they didn't have anything of value so they saw no point. Lila watched with narrowed eyes as Murphy took the key, locking the door before sauntering over to the toilet as he gave her a grin that was anything but amused. It was dark and dangerous. He held the key above the toilet and quirked a brow at her, almost like he was challenging her, expecting her to back down and stay.

"Murph, don't ye fuckin' dare!" Connor warned with wide eyes.

"Come on man!" Rocco pleaded. Murphy was being fucking ridiculous and everything had gotten so out of hand. Lila laughed loudly, looking at the man incredulously. It wasn't her usual warm laugh though, if anything she was just as scary as Murphy was.

"Go on, do it." She goaded with a smirk. She really didn't think he would, neither did Rocco. But Connor, Connor knew his brother all too well and how he was when he was angry, what lengths he would go to in order to get his own way. And as Murphy let the key go, letting it fall into the toilet with a plop, the others watched on as he flushed it. Letting the only key to the place go down the drain. Connor sighed agitated and wiped a hand over his face, turning away and tugging on his hair out of frustration at his stubborn pig-headed twin.

"That was the only fuckin' key man, how the fuck am I supposed to get outta here now?!" Rocco asked incredulously. Murphy's eyes never left Lila but he shrugged, his face almost smug as he smirked at her like he had won.

Lila licked her lower lip and quirked a brow at him. She'd never seen this side to Murphy and deep down she knew if it wasn't directed at her, it would most likely turn her on, because bossy angry Murphy was a sexy bastard, with his brooding eyes and wicked smile. But it _was_ directed at her and it just made her mad.

She glanced to the window as a plan formed in her mind, she walked over to it casually as she kept her eyes on the intense glaring Murphy.

"Mhm...okay. Have you had your fun now Murphy?" She asked condescendingly as she tilted her head, making Murphy bristle at her tone like she was talking to a child. She might as well have been with how he was acting.

"You know, that wasn't the _only_ way for me to leave." She mused, smirking almost as she got to the window and pushed it open, intending on going down the fire escape. It was like time slowed down yet also sped up at the same time. Connor was across the room and he was the first to know what was about to happen, his twin senses tingling, but he was too far away. Murphy launched himself at Lila, grabbing her around her waist from behind and trapping her arms by her sides before she had the chance to climb out. Connor and Rocco were shouting as they ran over, Lila screaming bloody murder and so many curse words that she put Rocco to shame.

"Yer not fuckin' leavin' 'til we talk about it!" Murphy yelled down her ear as she thrashed and tried to kick him to no avail, the tiny girl wasn't really any match for him and his strong arms. It was like he was immune or couldn't hear his brother and Rocco yelling at him to let her go.

"Go fuck yourself Murphy, I hope you rot in hell!" She screamed, rearing her head back, hoping to headbutt him, but Murphy anticipated the move and moved his head. Connor and Rocco watched on horrified not knowing what the fuck to do, things were just getting worse and worse and Murphy dragged her away from the window. She would bruise for sure with how tight his grip was but he wasn't thinking, he was just reacting to the overwhelming panic and fear of losing her and it had morphed into blind rage. Connor was actually shocked, completely mortified at how his brother was manhandling the poor lass, but before his brain registered to try and intervene, Rocco threw himself at Murphy.

"Fuckin' get off her man! You're hurtin' her!" It was brave of the man, Connor knew that, brave, but incredibly fucking stupid. But somewhere in the mess that the night had turned into, Connor felt somewhat pleased his best friend cared enough about Lila to try and help whilst he had been too busy stood in shock.

Rocco suddenly flew across the room with a resounding smack as he hit the table and it broke under his weight. Lila fell to the floor with the motion as Murphy had suddenly released her to shove Rocco away so hard the man had turned into fucking Superman for a moment. Silence descended on them all in shock, even Murphy as he realised what he had done. Rocco groaned, thankfully not injured but winded as fuck. Lila scrambled to her feet and Murphy thought she would dive out the window and take her chance to escape, yet instead she ran over to Rocco with a frown and got on her knees as she helped him sit up.

"Jesus Rocco, are you okay?" She asked worried, forgetting about how her arms felt like they were bruising already. He nodded weakly and grimaced as he sat up.

"Just winded." He muttered, shooting a hurt look to Murphy that made him blink at him, as if the red mist was dissipating and he realised every fucking thing he had done. Connor helped pull Rocco to his feet and the look he gave his twin was more menacing than anything Murphy had ever given to anyone. It took a lot to get that look from Connor, always the more controlled of the pair. And he knew it wasn't just what he'd done to Rocco that had earned him that look.

He was too absorbed in the overwhelming guilt that he hadn't seen the red whirlwind that was Lila storming over to him and shoving him so hard that he actually stumbled back.

"You fucking asshole! Do you just ruin everything you touch?!" She yelled at him, seething with anger. It wasn't so much what he had done to her, that she could handle, but poor Rocco hadn't deserved any of that. Her words might as well have been a knife to the heart and his face went from angry to blind pain and hurt. She felt a pang of guilt seeing his face crumple, but he deserved the words she had said. She just hated that she had to say them to Murphy. He couldn't even bring himself to speak and he vaguely registered Connor helping Rocco to sit on the couch. Connor could see Murphy's anger fading so he didn't think he'd try to manhandle Lila again, it was safe enough to check over his best friend. He'd heard her words and winced, he'd actually felt the stab to the heart as Murphy's heart broke all over again.

"Where is _my_ Murphy? My sweet and caring Murphy that I fucking adore so much? Because this asshole isn't him." She asked brokenly, tears welling in her eyes as her voice wavered. The look on her face made him take a step back, his own tears pricking the back of his eyes as he shook his head, completely mortified with himself. Her words made his heart clench so painfully that he thought it might give out completely. He wasn't stupid, he knew he had anger problems but he never thought it would come to this. He hadn't been able to contain his rage and it got the best of him. And now Lila and Rocco were suffering for it. Lila was right, he did ruin everything he touched. They just stood watching each other for a moment, neither of them seeing Connor as he walked over.

Connor felt for his brother, he really did. He felt his pain, he could fucking feel the regret. But he was pissed at him, beyond pissed even. How the fuck would they get her to stay when he'd practically roughed her up like that and hurt Rocco. Connor almost mirrored Murphy from earlier as he stalked right over, pressing his chest to his brothers, backing him up. Lila couldn't help but compare it to so some kind of animal channel documentary about animal packs and their hierarchy as she watched Murphy lower his head in submission and shrink away. She heard Connor growl, like actually physically growl, as he bumped chests with the darker haired twin and made him take a step back. Murphy was a far cry from minutes ago, looking like a lost boy as he kept his gaze on the floor. He couldn't stand to look at Connor, he didn't need to see the disappointment and anger on his face, it was bad enough feeling it so overwhelmingly.

Connor gripped his jaw roughly, making Murphy look at him with wide watery eyes.

"Ye _ever_ do somethin' like this again, and I'll fuckin' have ye, _boy_." He snarled, his voice low and scarier than Murphys had been. Murphy blinked, a stray tear falling down his face as his adams apple bobbed. He nodded weakly, the best he could with his face in a vice grip. He knew he had fucked up and he knew Connor was putting him in his place. He fucking needed it. Lila watched the pair, eyes wide and feeling worried Connor was about to beat the holy hell out of Murphy. She didn't want that, not that he didn't deserve it, but she hated to see the twins at odds with each other. Even after everything she still cared about the pair of them. She hesitantly reached a hand out, laying it on the arm that he was using to keep Murphy in place. His eyes snapped to hers and they went from pure rage to confusion and then just soft completely. Murphy glanced to her, half wondering if she would tell Connor to do him fucking in after how he had treated her. Lila remembered what Connor had told her once, how Murphy was over emotional, quick to anger. That he couldn't deal with his emotions but his heart was always in the right place. Both twins watched her carefully but her eyes were only on Connor, she didn't want to look at Murphy right now. She had seen him cry, to bow down in submission to his brother like a beaten dog and as much of an asshole as he had been, it had made her heart ache.

She shook her head, looking at Connor almost pleading and it only served to make more tears come from Murphy, he didn't deserve her help, he didn't deserve anything off her. Connor looked back to his brother, one last warning look before he let him go. Murphy stumbled backwards, his chest heaving as he glared at the floor. Connor waited for a moment, letting his anger subside. He wasn't like Murphy, he wasn't rash or impulsive. He was able to snap himself out of it pretty well. The lass wanted him to lay off Murphy and he didn't actually want to hurt him anyway. He could see as clear as day Murphy hated himself in that moment. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around his brother, his hand coming to cradle the back of his head and Murphy pushed his face into Connors' shoulder and wrapped his arms around him tightly. Lila walked away, leaving them to their moment, as she sat with Rocco. Murphy cried softly, sucking in harsh breaths as he tried to calm himself.

"M'fuckin' sorry Connor, the fucks wrong with me?" He sobbed, making Connor tighten his grip on him. He knew Murphy had not intended any of this and it broke his heart. He shushed him and let him cry it out like needed to. This was what he should have done in the first place instead of letting himself get angry instead.

Lila was fussing over Rocco, checking for injuries and he swatted her hand away playfully.

"I swear I'm fine Lila." He huffed, looking at her. He wasn't sure how the fuck he had gotten caught in the crosshairs of this shit storm but he wouldn't take back trying to help her. He had seen Murphy angry, he'd seen him beat the living shit out of someone for insulting his brother. But this shit was beyond that, despite no punches being thrown. Because him and Lila, they were his friends, hell he was fucking in love with the girl, and to see him turn on them like this, it was something else.

"Fuck, I'm sorry Rocco." She frowned, putting her face in her hands with a large sigh. Rocco looked at her with furrowed brows.

"The fuck for? You weren't the one that put me through the damn table." He said incredulously, not being able to wrap his head around the fact she was blaming herself.

"But you were only here for me, if it wasn't for me you wouldn't have been here." She sat up and ran her hand through her hair. It looked more unruly than usual after the scuffle with Murphy.

"I'm glad I was here, ain't like Connor was gonna step in, he fuckin' choked and stood there with his jaw hittin' the fuckin' floor." He scoffed, shaking his head with a frown. Lila nodded, she had wondered why Connor had not tried to help her, she hadn't been able to see him. But it seemed he had been stunned by Murphy behaviour. She guessed it said something that Murphy didn't go around fucking manhandling their friends like this usually.

She didn't know what to do. She was still upset, even more so now at Murphy, his behaviour had been more than out of line and even Connor knew that with how he seemed ready to give Murphy hell for what he had done. Yet she couldn't get Murphy's face out of her mind, how crestfallen he had looked, guilty, how he'd actually cried. She glanced over to the boys, they were on the opposite side of the apartment and couldn't hear what they were saying, but Murphy was clinging to Connor like he might drown if he didn't and she could see his body shaking, making it obvious he was crying. Connor rubbed his back and had one hand holding his brother's head firmly, looking like he was muttering comforting words to him. Despite it all, she was glad to see Connor being there for Murphy, he clearly had some issues and she was glad he didn't have to deal with it alone.

She thought back to the fire escape, she could leave now, she doubted Murphy would try to stop her again after all this, he'd probably think she'd never come back. She was also aware that the last ladder of the fire escape was broken and it was quite a jump down. In her earlier angry state she had been willing to take the chance of a broken ankle but now, not so much. Everything was a mess and she wasn't sure how they could come back from this. She stood up, making herself a glass of water and she noticed her hands shaking a little. She leant her back against the counter as she sipped it, watching as Rocco stood up and went over to the boys. Connor handed Murphy off to him and Murphy was practically wailing as he hugged Rocco in a vice-like grip, muttering a whole verse of apologies. Rocco just pat his back trying to comfort him. Connor looked up and his eyes met hers as she watched it all from the kitchen. His eyes looked apologetic and she felt for him. He hadn't had any part in this mess. He made no move to go over though, knowing she was probably still upset about earlier as well as Murphy's fucking lapse in sanity. When Rocco moved away from Murphy, the dark-haired twin wiped his eyes and sniffled.

The four of them stood there almost awkwardly, none of them knowing what to do or say. They couldn't really leave, the fire escape wasn't the best option and they all knew it. The air was thick with tension and Rocco did what he did best to try and clear the air, even just a little.

"Fuck man, I can't believe you flushed the only key down the fuckin' shitter." He grinned, looking at Murphy. There was a brief silence before Lila burst out laughing despite herself. It was fucking ridiculous the lengths Murphy had gone to get her not to leave. Her laughter filled the apartment and it was like a warmth spreading into them all. Connor snorted and shook his head, shooting his brother a thoroughly amused look. Even Murphy huffed a laugh, letting Lilas laughter creep into his heart and blossom like a flower in the hollow cavity there.

"Shit, I need a drink." Lila sighed, a slight smile still on her face. She walked over to the cupboard where she knew the booze was and pulled out an almost full bottle of Jamesons whiskey, walking over to Connors bed and sitting down. She set the bottle down and pulled off her boots and the twins felt relief that she wasn't about to go off in the night, even after what happened. They didn't have much hope that she would stay the next day though, but at least she would be safe for tonight. Rocco glanced to Connor and shrugged as he went and sat in front of her. Connor followed suit, sitting to her left. Murphy looked for a minute, feeling like he wouldn't be wanted there, not after what he had done. He just stood there as Lila opened the bottle and didn't bother with a glass, taking a long pull straight from the bottle and grimacing at the burn before handing it to Connor who did the same. Lila glanced up to Murphy and the air left his lungs as their eyes locked for a moment, not knowing what she would do or say.

"You coming or what Murph?" She asked, her voice not giving anything away by how she was currently feeling. He looked at her through his lashes, still thoroughly fucking ashamed with himself, and he sat down next to Rocco in front of her. Rocco took a swig and handed him the bottle and Murphy took a big chug of it. He chewed his lip as he handed it back to Lila almost sheepishly. She took it gratefully and took another pull. It might not have been the best idea but getting drunk seemed like the only way to fucking deal with the shit show that had been the night since they were all stuck together. She really wasn't sure where she stood now or what to do with anything. So instead, she decided Mr Jameson would be her best friend for the night, at least he had a way of making her forget all of her problems. She could deal with them tomorrow.


	12. Chapter 12

**Drowning sorrows and dealing with the aftermath.**

**Headcanon; The boys' accent gets thicker when they're drunk, emotional or nervous.**

The first hour of drinking was done so in silence, awkward at first like no one knew what to say. It eased into a more companionable silence after the alcohol started working its magic though and by the end of the hour, they were all well on their way to being drunk considering the amount of whiskey drank. Rocco had been the first to talk, he hated awkward situations and comedy was like his knee jerk reaction. So he opted to tell some funny stories from work and succeeded in making them laugh. Then Connor joined in, telling his own stories or commenting on Rocco's. Lila and Murphy had stayed silent. They kept glancing at each other and locking eyes until one of them would look away. There was still the large elephant in the room but neither wanted to address it tonight, they'd much rather get drunk instead of dealing with the problem. A few more drinks in and Murphy finally warmed up enough to join in the conversation, and in their usual fashion, the twins told stories, switching it up between them as they told them.

Lila was laughing her ass off by this point at one of the twins' stories from when they were only 10 years old. The alcohol had done wonders to ease her tension as well as the boys and they weren't thinking about the events of the night. The four of them had flushed cheeks and were practically swaying as they sat as their brains were saturated in alcohol.

"-so obviously Murph was furious, he was gunnin' for Jimmy Flanagan like a fuckin' pitbull. Bare in mind, Jimmy is a huge fuck, five years older than us, but Macho Murph here fuckin' went after him anyway!" Connor laughed animatedly, eyes lighting up as he told the story with his hands waving all around.

"Aye, but I wasnae gonna let him say that shit about ye deartháir (brother), only I can say that shit about ye." Murphy snorted, making a fist with his hand to prove his point.

"Yeah well, a lot o' good it did ye, ye went down like a sack o' shit from the first punch!" Connor laughed loudly as the others erupted into a chorus of laughter.

"Fuck you! I was ten! He was fifteen, at least I had the balls te even go after him!" Murphy scowled offended, making his twin laugh even harder.

"Aye ye did. But t'was Ma that ended up whoopin' his ass inte next week for hurtin' her precious wee Murph." Connor howled, remembering his mother's fury at the asshole that dared to hurt his brother as the others laughed.

"You can't be serious! Your Ma kicked hi-" Lila's sentence was cut off by a rather loud burp that left her lips and she slapped her hand over her mouth as her eyes widened. There was silence as the boys looked at her shocked before they burst into a fit of hysterical laughter. Lilas' cheeks flushed but she snorted and shook her head.

"Fuckin' hell lass, think ye've been hangin' around with us too much." Connor laughed, looking at her incredulously.

"How the fuck did that burp come out of a tiny thing like you?" Rocco snorted, looking somewhat impressed and also amused. She glanced to Murphy and he was looking at her with a small smile, shaking his head. She felt a warmth spread through her chest and she smiled back before looking down. Even with the alcohol, she was still conflicted and she hated it. She missed how things were, she missed Murphy. Her mood was going downhill rapidly.

"Why didn't you guys just tell me you liked me instead of being dicks?" She blurted out, the alcohol apparently making her brain filter malfunction. She glanced at Murphy and then Connor, noticing their laughter stopped abruptly. Connor shifted awkwardly where he sat. He didn't really expect the question, it caught him off guard. Murphy glared at his hands and chewed his lower lip, suddenly feeling anxious. Rocco felt like he was intruding so he got up and slipped onto the fire escape to have a smoke, not wanting to stick around whilst shit got serious.

"Do we have te do this now lass?" Connor asked regretfully as he blinked at her a little. They were all pretty drunk and he didn't think this conversation was a good idea.

"Yeah, we do. It was a shitty thing to do to me. And If I'm gonna forgive you for it, I'd like to know." The whiskey had made her bolder, and she didn't seem angry now, she seemed curious and sad instead. Murphy wiped a hand over his face and squirmed a little. He'd hoped to avoid the topic of anything that had happened for the night.

"Lila, I think this conversation would be better for the mornin'." Murphy said softly, glancing to her through his lashes. She looked at him and the raw hurt in her eyes made him swallow the lump forming in his throat as his heart ached. He lowered his gaze, unable to meet her eyes out of pure shame.

Connor shifted to sit to face her fully and took one of her hands in his carefully, watching for her reaction. She just looked down at their hands and blinked for a minute before turning her eyes back on him. The whiskey seemed to have quelled her anger.

"Look...we know we did wrong, and we'll spend the rest o' our miserable lives fuckin' grovellin' if we have te, but we are sorry. We just...didn't think I guess? I dunno. We just didn't think ye thought o' us more than friends. Which makes it worse in a way, that we'd do it anyway thinkin' that we'd never have a chance." Connor rambled drunkenly, struggling to find the right words with his alcohol-soaked brain. Lila just stared at him, letting his words sink through the layers of alcohol.

"We were selfish, and we're sorry. I'm sorry." Murphy whispered as his gaze practically burnt her with its intensity, almost pleading with his blue eyes. She nibbled her lower lip for a minute before she turned back to Connor.

"I need time, to trust you both again. Out of everyone, I never thought you two would do this to me. I thought I could trust you both with my life." She said sadly as she looked down to where Connor was still holding her hand.

"Ye can lass. I know it might not seem like it, but we'll fuckin' prove it te ye." Connor said sincerely. Lila then looked back to Murphy who was still watching her carefully, painfully aware of his brother holding Lilas hand and how he himself had no right to even look at her now, let alone touch her.

"Me and you need a serious talk tomorrow, when we're not drunk." She stated seriously, her eyes still showing her pain from what he had done to her. He lowered his head in shame and nodded as he swallowed thickly. He was dreading that conversation but he counted himself lucky she wanted to talk to him at all.

Rocco came back in, looking at them all to see if it was safe, and Lila shot him a weak smile letting him know it was fine. The mood in the loft had grown somber and without words, they all decided they should sleep. Rocco crashed on the couch and almost conked out right away and Lila got up, going behind the screen to change into the shirt she'd been sleeping in. She tried not to think about the fact it was Murphys. When she came back from behind the screen, the boys were in Connors bed and Murphy looked at her. Seeing her still wearing his shirt made his heart hammer hard inside of his rib cage and he closed his eyes. Lila climbed into Murphys bed and curled up facing away from them. She really wasn't looking forward to waking up and having to face everything that had happened with a clear head.

Lila woke first the next morning and she climbed out of bed. She looked around the loft with a frown. The table was in pieces and her clothes were strewn about the place from when Murphy had snatched the bag from her. She was more than shocked she didn't have a hangover but she presumed she was getting used to drinking so much because of the boys. Rocco was still passed out on the couch and she presumed he wouldn't wake until at least noon. She slipped on some sweatpants that Connor had given her previously when she was cold as she looked down at the boys. They were spooning, Connor being the big spoon of course with his arm around Murphys middle, and despite the dull ache in her chest, she smiled to herself. It was amusing and endearing all at the same time. She jumped out of her skin when she heard the door handle rattling a little, watching with wide eyes as the door opened. She relaxed when she saw the maintenance man, she hadn't even noticed one of the twins making a call to him the night before about the flushed away key. The man glanced around at the state of the place and the three sleeping men with almost amusement, presuming they just had a wild night. The man knew the boys, it wasn't the first time something like this had happened. Lila walked over and gave him a grateful smile as he handed her the spare key silently, clearly not wanting to wake the sleeping men in the loft.

She heaved a sigh when the man left as she knelt by the mattress next to Murphy. She took the moment to just look at him. He looked so peaceful and calm when he slept, he looked even younger and boyish. There were so many facets to Murphy, it made her head spin. There was angry Murphy, full of primal and menacing energy that commanded a room. It was sexy as hell unless it was directed at her, then it just made her heart hurt. Then there was sweet Murphy, the side of him that would rub her feet without asking after work when her feet hurt, the side that would ask her continuously if she was hungry or needed a drink, if she was too hot or cold, wanting to make sure she was okay and comfortable at all times. The side she had seen of him the night before was scary, and she needed to be clear to him that if he ever did that again to her, he'd never see her again. It was fine when he was mad at someone else, they always deserved it, but it was uncalled for last night. She wanted to know why he had acted that way with her, she felt like maybe if she heard him out, it could help her to understand and maybe be able to forgive him.

She chewed her lip nervously as she reached a hand out, stroking his hair softly.

"Murph, wake up." She whispered, rubbing her fingers on his scalp soothingly. Murphy blinked his eyes open tiredly, his eyes settling on her stroking his hair. He gave her a sleepy smile but then it vanished when his brain had given him a mental recap of all that had happened. He felt his heart constrict as he looked at her, she looked so sad and it was his fault. But here she was, stroking his hair and looking down at him like an angel in the light of the loft. She moved her hand and he felt the loss instantly. He watched as she stood and gestured to the fire escape before walking off and going out the window. Murphy sighed and managed to successfully get out of his twins grasp. He chucked his robe on, grabbing his smokes and followed after her.

She was stood leaning against the rail and looking out at nothing in particular and she glanced to him when he joined her side. They were silent for a moment, neither of them looking at the other as Murphy lit a smoke and let the nicotine calm his nerves. He was fully expecting her to tell him she was leaving forever and he felt sick at the feeling, though he knew he deserved it. He wasn't sure what to say so he stayed silent and waited for her to gather her thoughts and talk.

"Why did you act that way?" Her soft voice cut through the air and he still couldn't look at her, instead he opted to focus on his smoke and stare at nothing. He worked his jaw a little as he tried to make sure the words came out right.

"The thought of ye leavin'...I just...When I don't know how te deal with somethin', negative shit, I get mad…I dunno why, I've always been that way I guess. Ma sent me te a fuckin' head doctor once 'cause o' me temper. But… Wasn't really interested, didn't listen to 'em, didn't care. They gave up tryin' in the end... I was scared...when ye said ye were goin'. I knew we fucked up and...I was terrified o' losin' ye forever. 'Cause I can't imagine ye not bein' in our lives now. And me head...It gets all mixed up when I'm upset, 'cause I cannae deal with it, so it turned inte anger. The shrink told me once it was some kind o' defense mechanism, 'cause I can deal with anger, I can break shit, scream at someone or fuckin' get in a fight, ye know? I've never really lost me temper with someone that don't rightly deserve it, but last night...was a first for me...and certainly a fuckin' last." He admitted, rubbing his lip with his thumb thoughtfully. She nodded a little, glancing at him waiting to see if he continued. She could practically see the cogs in his head turning as he tried to gather his words.

"I know what I did was...I fuckin'...I'm sorry. Can't even tell ye how sorry I am. I let me anger get the best o' me and I hurt ye. I'll never forgive meself for it and I don't expect you too either. Surprised Conn didn't put me in the fuckin' hospital last night, 'cause if it was him that did that te ye, I woulda fuckin' **killed **him ." He sounded so bitter and angry at himself, sneering at himself almost before taking a long drag of his smoke.

Lila stood there thoughtful for a moment. She was glad he was being open and honest with her, and she already knew he had a temper, his twin had told her as much. She didn't realise it had been that bad he'd had to see someone about it though. She knew he hadn't done it intentionally, she knew deep down he wouldn't hurt her on purpose. It was something he seemed to have no control over. He was scared, scared that he was going to lose her and it had gotten out of hand.

"What happened last night, it can't happen again Murphy. I appreciate you're sorry and I can see you are. But that kind of shit won't fly with me. If you ever do that to me again, you'll never see me again." She said firmly, looking at him. He was shocked, blinking a little as he looked out at nothing still, was she saying that she was sticking around? Did this mean she might eventually forgive him? He nodded and turned to look at her as he discarded his smoke. But his eyes widened, in the light of outside, he could clearly see the bruises formed on the tops on her arms where he had restrained her, he was surprised he hadn't fucking cracked her ribs with the force he used on her.

His face fell visibly and it felt like his heart exploded in his chest and left a gaping hole. Tears stung his eyes and he sucked in a shaky breath, lowering his head in shame. She watched him carefully and when she glanced at herself she noticed the marks, she hadn't even seen them before now. Her heart ached seeing him so upset, despite the fact he should have been since he had been the one to leave those marks on her. But she could see how it was eating him alive. She just wanted her happy Murphy back. She watched him, trying to figure out the next move, what she should do and she saw his chest heaving a little as he tried to calm himself down. He looked so broken and defeated.

Despite her better judgment, she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his middle. His hands hung limply at his sides, he didn't deserve her hugs, he didn't deserve anything but a fucking punch from her. He looked at the sky and squeezed his eyes shut as his heart hurt more and more by the second. Tears streaming down his face. Lila felt his body start to shake with silent sobs and she squeezed him tighter, her own tears falling down her cheeks. She would never excuse his behaviour, neither would he, that much was clear. But she couldn't stand to see him hurting like this. It was a bad day and she wanted to move on from it and try to rebuild the friendship they had formed. Because as much as they had hurt her, Murphy in particular, she needed these boys. They meant more to her than she could even vocalize and losing them wasn't an option. She'd told Murphy it couldn't happen again and what would happen if it did, but something told her he would never do it again anyway, it seemed to have traumatised him enough to realise what he had done.

When he felt her squeeze harder, his arms came around her, holding her tightly as one hand went into her hair as usual. His fingers tangled in her wild mane of red hair and he buried his nose in it, the scent soothing him as he broke down. His sobs were pitiful and he sounded like a pained child. Lilas heart broke into pieces and she fisted the back of his shirt as she cried along with him. They stayed that way until both of their sobs eased off and she moved away just a fraction. She looked up at him with her glassy eyes and tear-stained face and his bottom lip quivered. He lowered his head again unable to look at her and closed his eyes, Lila cupped his cheeks and wiped away his tears. Murphy rested his forehead on hers and reveled in her soothing touch, feeling blessed that she was even showing him this kindness. It was one of the things he loved most about her, how sweet and caring she was, always putting others first even if they didn't deserve it, like him.

"I forgive you Murph. Just make sure it doesn't happen again." She whispered through her tears. His heart squeezed and he shook his head, he didn't deserve her forgiveness and he'd surely confess after mass on Sunday and do any penances he had to, to atone for his sins. He swallowed thickly, unable to open his eyes and look at the woman that had captured both his and his brother's hearts, a woman who deserved so much fucking better. She hated how he wouldn't look at her, how he didn't want her forgiveness.

"I want my sweet happy Murphy back. Please?" She pleaded softly, her heart aching terribly. His eyes fluttered open, looking so fucking pained and she blinked at him, her thumbs stroking his cheeks softly. He sniffed a little and nodded, the movement making her head move too since his head was on hers, and she gave him a weak smile. He tried to give her one back but it was so small it was almost nonexistent.

She moved away and took his hand to lead him back inside. She wanted to talk to Connor too now, to clear the air. It was the only way they could move past everything and she just wanted to get it over and done with, like ripping off a bandaid.

"Can you wake Connor for me please?" She asked softly, making him nod and walk over to the mattress as he wiped his eyes. She could hear Rocco still snoring away and she found herself going to walk to the table to sit down. She stopped and looked at it forlornly in pieces and she closed her eyes, inhaling deeply. The reminders of the night before still hurt and she tried to calm herself, she wanted to move on, she wanted things back to how they were.


	13. Chapter 13

**Serious talks, forgiveness and some good old fashioned ribbing each other.**

When Lila stopped staring at the broken table longingly, the table that once was the place for their family like meals together, she turned to see Connor sitting up in bed, rubbing his eyes tiredly with Murphy sat next to him. The twins didn't need to talk to each other, they could communicate from thoughts, feelings and looks alone. And Connor knew the lass had forgiven his brother before she even sat down on the mattress with them. He was glad she had. He knew she had every right not to, Murphy's behavior had been so appalling his brother was ready to tear his limbs off. But he knew underneath it all, Murphy was just hurt and confused, he was scared and he had handled it terribly. But Lila had found it in her big beautiful heart to forgive him, and Connor admired her for that.

She sat down in front of them, tossing the new key in Connors lap and playing with her fingers before glancing at them both.

"I want to clear the air. If we're all gonna move on from this and be friends again then we need to talk, or shits gonna get awkward." She sighed, shooting them a rueful smile. They just nodded quietly, letting her continue with what she wanted to say. Connor reached out and gripped the back of Murphy's neck, a gesture Lila noticed he did a lot when Murphy was upset, as if it comforted and grounded him.

"I don't need to tell you both that what you did wasn't okay, you've made it pretty clear you see that now. I need some time to trust you again like I did, but I'll get there. You two really hurt me but...I care about you too much to just walk away. I need you both in my life, and I get that you didn't do it to hurt me. I just need to make it clear that if I find out you've pulled this kind of shit again, I won't be sticking around. This is the only warning you'll get, and honestly you're lucky you're even getting it. I was ready last night to just leave." She said softly as she leveled her gaze on the two of them. They both looked guilty and sad as they nodded in agreement. They were beyond grateful for the second chance, and to hear her say she cared too much to walk away, it made their hearts ache.

"Won't ever happen again lass, I can promise ye that. We were selfish and it was wrong." Connor sighed, he still looked sleepy and Lila had to fight a smile at how adorable he looked.

"As long as we're clear, I'd like us to be friends again. I miss how it was, the three of us. We can't pretend what happened, didn't happen, but I'd like to just try and move on from it. We don't need to drag it up and go over it over and over again. Its done, it can't be changed. You upset me and you know it, you've said sorry. There's no point dwelling on the past, life's too short." She said quietly. The boys agreed wholeheartedly, they were more than pleased for the opportunity to make things right, even more so for Murphy after what he had done. They all wanted to go back to how it was and they were more than happy never to bring it up again like she suggested. She was right, it was done, no use crying over spilt milk and all that. They needed to earn back her trust, and they fucking would. They realized the error of their ways and they were not in the habit of making the same mistake twice.

They sat there for a minute, the boys looking at Lila carefully as she watched them. As if they were making sure they were all on the same page and okay to move on. Connor and Murphy didn't need to look at each other, they could feel each other out, especially with Connors hand on Murphys neck, taking a mental evaluation of the other. They all knew it was going to be a little weird at first, but they needed to push through it until things were normal again. Since Lila and Murphy had extra stress after Murphys outburst, Connor took it upon himself once again, to be the one to take initiative.

"Well then...shall we go for some breakfast?" He asked with a smile as he held up the key, trying to break any tension left over. Lila felt her stomach growl at the mere mention of food and she nodded with a smile, before looking over to the couch where a sleeping Rocco lay.

"Shouldn't we wait for Rocco?" She asked quizzically. Murphy snorted and shook his head.

"Nay love, he'll sleep like the dead 'til the afternoon." He said, giving her a somewhat shy smile, still feeling tentative about even talking to her. She felt her chest constrict hearing him call her love again but she didn't bring it up. It made her happy and she knew if she said anything or made it obvious she was shocked, he would act like a spooked animal. She wasn't sure he even knew he had done it since it was such a habit.

She remembered her harsh words the night before, telling him she wasn't his girl. It sent a jolt of guilt through her body. Of course, technically she wasn't his girl, or Connors. But she had enjoyed that endearing term. It only made her mad in the moment because the of what had happened, telling people she belonged to them, like some kind of fucking dog, it rubbed her up the wrong way. She thought about mentioning it to him at some point, telling him he could call her that and apologising. Now the anger had faded, she remembered the heartbreaking look on his face once those words left her lips, visibly recoiling like she had smacked him. She knew what had happened wouldn't just vanish, it would loom over them like a dark cloud ready to spill over and rain down on them. But she wanted to fucking try and go back to normal. She knew they were sorry and it wouldn't happen again, and she hoped that was enough, like an umbrella to shield her from the downpour.

They all got up and got dressed, once again matching with their jeans and black tops. The boys wore their long sleeve tees and Lila put on a black sweater. It wasn't just for warmth, she wanted to cover to bruises Murphy had left on her because she couldn't deal with the questions, not just yet. She also hated how Murphys eyes wandered to them and how she could see the pain behind his eyes, knowing what he had done to her. She wasn't sure if Connor had picked up on them yet, if he had he hadn't said anything and she was grateful. Murphy didn't need to feel any more guilty than he already did and she wasn't sure how Connor would react to seeing the marks, she didn't want a repeat of the night before. She put her messy hair up in a ponytail, as usual a few stands framing her face, and she slipped her boots on.

The walk to the diner was strange, Lila once again could feel the dark cloud above them. Normally the boys were all smiles and full of laughter, they'd touch her hands and arms or briefly wrap an arm around her shoulder or waist. But this time, even though she was in the middle of them, they kept a slight distance. Usually they were so close it was right in her personal space and she didn't mind it. The boys were reluctant to touch her, despite their hands itching to reach out to her. They thought it might have been too soon for that, even with Lilas words of asking for things to be how they were. They were not sure if she would be ready for that just yet.

"_Tá sé seo chomh fucking Connor crua _(This is so fucking hard Connor)." Murphy muttered over her head to his brother, his face looking like a sad puppy.

"_Cád é? _(What is?)" Lila asked, glancing up at the darker haired twin amused that he had obviously not meant for her to know what he had said. Murphy eyes widened in shock and Connor barked out a laugh next to her at his brother's luck.

Not every Irish person could speak Irish, in fact it was rare these days. The language was dying off with only a few regions still speaking it. Their Ma had insisted they learn it along with the other various languages they had learnt and they really hadn't expected Lila to be able to speak it. Murphy lowered his head as his cheeks flushed, it only made her more amused, she always got a kick out of teasing the boys and embarrassing them.

"Didn't know ye could speak Irish lass. What other languages can ye speak?" Connor asked with a smile from her left. He was genuinely curious but Murphy knew he was also asking so they don't slip up again, that would be embarrassing. Murphy felt a surge of panic when he remembered the night they were all drunk and he had told her he loved her in French before passing out and Connor told her in Italian. He had presumed she either forgot or hadn't understood since she never mentioned it to them or acted weird about it. She glanced at Connor with a grin.

"Just Irish, my da taught me when I was younger, before he died. He was really proud of our heritage and wanted to make sure I learnt it." She said with a wistful smile as she remembered her father fondly. Connor nodded and gave her a warm smile, and Murphy felt himself relax. Well at least that saved him some embarrassment.

"What about you two? You both spoke to me in different languages that night we all got wasted, after my grandads funeral." She asked curiously, the topic of what Murphy told Connor thankfully forgotten, because he didn't want to drag everything back up, she had asked them specifically not to. Lila looked at Murphy like she was waiting for him to answer the question and he felt grateful he was being included, he still felt like he had no right to be there after what he did. Lila had always done this, asking questions back and forth between the pair like she didnt want either of them to feel left out of the conversation, the boys were never sure if she did it unintentionally or on purpose but they were grateful all the same. She didn't play favourites and it helped them with their new feelings for her and the issue of jealousy that had briefly happened in the earlier days of knowing her.

"Quite a few, French, Italian, Spanish, German, Russian, Latin and o' course Irish. Our Ma insisted on it m'girl." He smiled proudly, he had always loved how their Ma had pushed them with their education. The twins might seem like just rowdy Irish boys that liked a drink and worked at a meat packing plant, but they were very intelligent. It didnt hurt any that the lasses seemed to love it when he spoke to them in French in bed, it scored him some extra points. His eyes widened a little when he had slipped up and called her his girl and he was waiting for the girl to yell at him or say some other words that hurt his heart, but they never came.

"Holy shit, how do you even remember all of them, that's insane." She scoffed a laugh. Murphy was confused, had she not heard him? Or was it okay now? He felt like he didn't know whether he was coming or going but he didn't mention it. If she hadn't heard him it would make things incredibly fucking awkward if he brought it up.

"We learnt in school when we were younger, it was easier back then. Besides, the teachers in Ireland can be scary bastards, gives ye fuckin' incentive te learn better." Connor laughed, shaking his head a little as he looked over at Murphy, remembering their school days fondly. Murphy gave him a smile letting him know he was thinking the same.

"So do you talk to each other all the time in different languages when you want to be all sneaky?" She asked with a quirked brow and a smirk, glancing back and forth. Murphy's ears turned pink again and he looked at the floor with a shy smile as Connor chuckled.

"I suppose we do lass." He replied vaguely as he lit up a smoke and handed it to his brother before lighting one for himself.

"Why though? Why don't you use your twin telepathy thing that you do?" She asked curiously. The boys stopped dead in their tracks in sync with each other. Connors smoke almost fell from his lips as his jaw practically dropped and Murphy tilted his head as he quirked a brow, looking somewhat amused.

"How the fuck did ye know about that?" Murphy asked incredulously. They'd never really spoke about any of their twin things, they kept it to themselves. It was between them after all. Rocco knew some of it just from being their best friend and being around them so much.

She turned to look at them and snorted at their shocked faces.

"Because I've seen it. You know things from just a look at each other, no words needed. You're always touching each other and it's like...you can just...feel each other out ...and not to mention the _cuddling_." Her eyes danced with mischief at her last words and Murphy spluttered on the smoke he had inhaled. The boys hadn't realised how obvious it was to her how their twin bond worked, no one else ever figured it out. She always seemed to know them perfectly well and it was slightly unsettling.

"We do not fuckin' _cuddle_!" Connor objected, so fucking offended that it made Lila burst out laughing. Apparently Murphys voice wasn't the only one that raised an octave or two.

"Yes you do! I've seen you. Hell, just this morning you were _spooning_ Murphy. I woke him up remember, saw it with my own eyes." She smirked amused, crossing her arms over her chest and giving him a look that said _tell me I'm wrong._ Connors mouth moved but no words came out as he looked from Murphy to Lila. Murphy raised his brows at him looking amused as well. He didn't care if people knew they cuddled and he already knew Lila had seen them. It didn't bother him none, they were twins. They'd shared a fucking womb for nine months, closeness was second nature to them.

"S'wrong Conn? Afraid yer fragile masculinity can't handle it?" He asked teasingly with his ridiculously smug smirk. Lila snorted and bit her lip to stop her laughter as Connor glared at her playfully.

"Don't worry Connor, I think its..._cute._" She grinned, looking all innocent. Murphy barked out a laugh as Connor pulled a face at her, like the vein in his head was going to explode.

"Ah fuck off, the both o' ye!" He grumbled as he started walking again. Lila locked eyes with Murphy as they both burst out laughing again.

"Aye, come on love, before he sulks." Murphy grinned as he started walking with her. They caught up to Connor and Lila reached out, poking his side. He yelped a little causing Murphy to laugh loudly when people looked on at them. Connor narrowed his eyes at her for making him make such a womanly noise in public and she just flashed him a grin. He shook his head and smiled at her. It was like most of the tension had already left, teasing each other like normal. Lila wanted things to return back to normal and now she had hope. Things were feeling less weird and she still enjoyed spending time with them. They made a mistake, and now it was time to move on.


	14. Chapter 14

**Noone told me my formatting was all ass upwards o.O**

**Because sometimes, brotherly love means beating the shit out of each other… :')**

**How do you eat your pancakes? I have mine just how Lila does haha.**

When they got to the diner, the air was much lighter than when they had left the apartment. Their teasing of Connor had lifted the mood and they were trying their best to leave the events of the past behind them. They were eating their breakfast quietly but Lila felt the twins eyes on her and she heaved a sigh, leveling her gaze on their mildly horrified faces.

"For fuck sake guys, it's not that weird! It's just sugar!" She huffed exasperated, looking back to her pancakes with a mountain of sugar on them. Murphy shoveled a mouthful of his own pancakes in his mouth but his had maple syrup on, just like his twins. He eyed her plate warily and scrunched up his nose.

"Aye lass but...that's not how ye fuckin' eat pancakes. How have yer teeth not fallen out yet wit' all that sugar?" Connor asked as he looked to her plate incredulously. She sneered at him and huffed, stabbing some pancakes on her fork with a large amount of sugar on it and locking eyes with his as she popped it in her mouth dramatically. She quirked a brow at him, making a kissing motion just to be a smart ass and Murphy snorted and shook his head.

"Yer a fuckin' weird one love." He muttered looking amused.

"Maybe, but would we be friends if I was normal?" She asked with a smirk. The twins glanced to each other with grins and laughed.

"Fuck no." They answered in unison with a smile.

The trio ate their food continuing their playful banter, this time ribbing Murphy when Connor told her that Murphy used to eat ketchup sandwiches when he was younger. They finished their food and took some to go for Rocco for when he woke up. It was Lilas suggestion, once again looking out for other people. When they got back to the loft, Rocco was still asleep. Connor and Murphy went over, seemingly to wake the poor man up.

"Leave him to sleep." Lila chided softly, making them look at her like scolded children as they walked away from the couch. Lila set about picking up her clothes that were everywhere and Murphy had the decency to look guilty as he helped her. She didn't mention it though, they were supposed to be moving past it after all. Once her clothes were away, she went and sat with Connor on the floor near the broken table. He was frowning and muttering curse words to himself.

"Is it dead?" She asked forlornly, she fucking loved that table. Connor huffed and looked at her, nodding regretfully.

"''Fraid so, sorry lass." It was almost comical how it sounded like they were talking about a fucking person. Murphy flopped down next to Connor, picking up one of the pieces and examining it, looking miserable since it was his fault.

"We need a table, I miss our family dinners already." Lila mused sadly. The boys glanced at each other discreetly, it meant she was planning on a still staying here and they didn't miss how she'd called them a family. It was almost overwhelming, but in a good way.

"We'll get one eventually lass." Connor sighed as he tried to give her a nice smile.

"Let's just get one now, I'll pay for it." She offered as she stood up, making her way to her jacket.

"Absolutely fuckin' not! T'was my fault, I'll fuckin' pay for it." Murphy frowned as he looked up at her. Connor heaved a large sigh and wiped a hand over his face.

"Murph…" Lila started. She wasn't sure how to word it, '_you're piss poor and can't afford it'_ seemed a little rude and was sure to offend the twins. Murphy raised a brow at her as he looked at her defiantly, waiting for her to continue.

"Look, I stay here with you, you don't ask me to contribute at all, just let me do this." She asked softly, looking between them both carefully.

"Lila lass, ye do fuckin' contribute. Ye cook for us and clean, ye make us smile and keep our sorry asses company. It's more than enough." Connor said firmly. She just shook her head and huffed like a child not getting their own way. Connor half expected her to start stomping her feet any moment now.

"You can't afford it right now, I'm not fucking stupid boys. I don't want to have to sit at the couch to eat. I love sitting with you both when you get home from work, talking about your day and having a nice meal together." She pleaded. They sighed and glanced to each other, when she worded it like that they felt like they couldn't deny it. They enjoyed it too, they'd often joke between them she was like their little housewife and they didn't realise just how much she loved it too. She wasn't wrong, they couldn't afford it, not right now anyway. But Murphys pig headedness wasn't having any of it. Unfortunately for him, Connor decided to give in.

"Fine, we'll go and get a fuckin' table." He sighed, like he was so hard done to, to let the girl buy something for them. Murphy shot him a scowl as he watched Connor stand and brush off his legs. Suddenly a hand appeared in front of his face and he glanced up to Lila who had walked right in front of him, peering down at him with a hopeful smile. He closed his eyes and sighed before taking her hand. She didn't really help him to get up since she was a small little thing and he was much stronger, he would have pulled her over if he had even tried. But he kept hold of her hand as he got up. She beamed at him, pleased she got her own way and he huffed a laugh at her. They put on their coats and headed out for the second time that day, leaving Rocco to rest.

The last time the lads went shopping with a lass, it had been their mother, and they thought it was bad then, but it was fucking worse now. They were in the furniture store whilst Lila looked over every fucking table they had, she couldn't decide what to get. The boys were perched on a sofa for sale next to the tables.

"Fuckin' Christ love, a table's a table, just fuckin' pick one." Murphy whined dramatically as he lay his head on his brothers shoulder.

"We don't need one that big lass, just get that one over there." Connor sighed as he gestured to the quaint four seater table. Lila was currently looking longingly at a big six seater. They didn't even think they had room for that one. Lila squinted at them both before walking over to the table that Connor suggested, eyeing it up. It was nice, mahogany, and the backs of the chairs had an intricate weave design. She went over to the salesperson and soon enough the boys were carrying the flat packed box home. She opted not to tell them the price, she didn't want them to have a heart attack.

When they got home, the boys set the box down and Lila grabbed a kitchen knife, sitting down with the box as she opened it with the knife. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed the twins hovering near the couch. She looked at them and squinted suspiciously as they spoke in hushed tones in another language. It seemed the twins had decided Rocco had slept enough and they tipped the back of the couch forward, making Rocco roll off it and hit the floor with a thud and a groan.

"Aw fuck man, what the fuck?" He whined tiredly, making the boys laugh like children and pat each other on the back like a job well done. Lila rolled her eyes and snorted as she got the box open and started taking the pieces out.

"You've got breakfast here Roc." She called out to him, looking over as the twins helped him stand up. Rocco smiled grateful at her, she was a fucking angel.

Connor and Murphy went over to Lila and sat on either side, their respective sides. She'd noticed that Murphy was always on her right whereas Connor was always on her left. It occurred to her that Murphy was right handed, leaving his left side his weaker one, and Connor was left handed. She noticed when they were together too that Murphy stood to Connors right and Connor to the left. She wondered if they were somehow guarding each others weaker side. Then she wondered why she was even thinking such weird deep thoughts about the two of them, like she knew them much too well despite the fact she hadn't even known them that long. Rocco joined them with his tray of breakfast and a fork, they were sat in a circle with the table in between them. Murphy picked up the little bag with all the screws in, looking like he didn't have a fucking clue what to do with them. He looked to his brother and they shared a look before glancing back down at the table.

"We need a screwdriver." Lila stated, like it was obvious when they made no move to get their tools. Connor looked at her sheepishly like he was embarrassed.

"Well ye see lass...we don't have one." He said with a grimace. Lila tilted her head and looked baffled.

"You don't have one? You don't have any tools? Isn't that what men do, like fix things and have tools?" She asked looking amused.

"Fuckin' hell love, a bit sexist aren't ye?" Murphy asked with a laugh.

"She's right though, how the fuck you ain't have any tools? What happens when you need to fix somethin'? You two knuckleheads are always breakin' shit." Rocco snorted whilst shoveling food into his mouth.

"We just don't fix it." Connor shrugged as he stood up. If something got broke they just threw it away. He left the apartment and Lila gave Murphy a quizzical look, he just shrugged his shoulders at her as he examined the instructions, looking like they were written in a foreign language. Christ he would probably be able to understand them better if they were.

Connor returned with a large tool box not long after.

"Borrowed it from Mr O'Keefe a few doors down." He explained in answer to Lilas confused expression. She nodded and they set to work. It took them over an hour and now they were stood looking at the table that had been built.

"Something seems..._off_." Lila stated, tilting her head as she looked it over. The whole table was wonky as shit and she couldn't figure out how the four of them had managed to fuck it up so badly. Although she shouldn't have been too surprised when the twins were reading out the instructions as '_the thingymabob needs te attach te the dooda', _or Murphys wonderful '_ye gotta stick the thing that looks like a cock inte the thing that looks like a vag'._ That one had earned a chorus of laughter from the boys like a bunch of 12 year old school kids whilst Lila shook her head with a snort.

"No it doesn't, it looks fine." Connor said defensively, like her words were hurting his pride. He grabbed a glass and placed it on the table to prove his point and they all watched as the glass slid right off and smashed onto the floor. Murphy lowered his head and bit his lip to try not to laugh but it came out as an inelegant snort instead and it only made Lila more amused.

"No you're right Connor, it looks _fucking_ _perfect_." She smirked at him, fighting the grin that was trying to work its way on her face as Murphy covered his mouth with his hand to stop his laughter coming out. Rocco barked out a laugh and shook his head when Connor gave her an unimpressed look at her sass.

Murphy rubbed his thumb over his lip thoughtfully before walking over to a small stack of books Connor had by his bed. He grabbed one and came back over, placing a book under the leg that had somehow managed to seem shorter than it should be. He grinned triumphantly when the table stood much straighter than before but it was gone in an instant when the whole table collapsed and fell into a heap on the floor. The four of them stood stunned for a moment staring at it before they all erupted in laughter. How the fuck had they managed that one?

"Do you think Mr O'Keefe would put it up for us if we pay him?" Lila asked amused as she glanced at Connor. He looked at her, horrified at the suggestion.

"There's no need for that! We can fuckin' do it!" He cried defensively as he gestured wildly to him and Murphy, once again feeling his pride taking a blow. Murphy laughed and shook his head at his brother.

"C'mon Connor, face it, we fucked it up." He grinned, thoroughly amused by his brothers issue to let someone else do it for him. Connor grumbled some curse words, earning more laughs at him by the others before he left. He returned with the old man and after another hour, the table was done, properly this time, and Mr O'Keefe left $20 richer.

Rocco left not long after, giving Lila an extra squeeze and telling her everything would be alright. She liked Rocco and she made a mental note to hang out with him sometime just the two of them. He'd really been there for her with everything that had happened and she was grateful for him. Connor was still sulking about his '_failure te be a man_' as his twin so eloquently put it, as the three of them sat at their new table.

"Fuck, this is kinda fancy aye Connor?" Murphy grinned as he ran a finger along the mahogany table top.

"Aye." He murmured in reply, his eyebrows furrowed as he glanced to Lila who was watching as his brother practically make love to the table with an amused look on her face.

"Lass? How much did this thing cost ye?" Connor asked seriously, making her look at him sheepishly and look back at the table. The simple fact she couldn't look him in the eye made him realise it wasn't something he'd be happy with. Murphy narrowed his eyes, distracted from his admiration as he leant back in the chair and looked her over.

"Lila?" Murphy asked carefully, not liking her silence.

"It doesn't matter, it's here now and we're not taking it back, so deal with it." She said, squinting at the both of them now. They didn't like it but they didn't say anything more. The damn lass could be a stubborn as Murphy sometimes.

"So...I think as punishment for what you two did, you should make us dinner today." She grinned after a moment of silence. The boys looked horrified as they glanced from each other to her.

"Now then lass, I thought ye said we weren't te mention it again, and this here feels an awful lot like ye mentionin' it." Connor said, half amused, half terrified because they couldn't cook worth shit, and they hated cooking with a passion. A sly smirk spread across her face as she looked from Murphy to Connor.

"Well, I guess if you're not really sorry then…" She shrugged, heaving a dramatic sigh and looking down, trying not to laugh. She couldn't look at the boys faces, they were priceless as they looked mortified and guilty all at the same time and she would have laughed.

"O' course we are! Don't do that! We'll fuckin' cook for ye, alright? Fuckin' hell, don't be mad at us again!" Murphy pleaded pitifully.

"Good!" She grinned, laughing at their faces when they realised she had played them to her advantage.

It was a mistake, a huge fucking mistake. She should have listened when Murphy had warned her they couldn't cook, she should have listened. But she didn't. She didn't possibly think these two could mess a simple stew up _that much_. But boy did they fucking massacre the shit out of that stew, and each other. She had left to grab some booze from the shop just down the street. A few bottles of red wine and some whiskey. Beers too of course, lest the boys never forgive her. They weren't happy for her to go alone but she ordered them to stay and start the food. When she returned, the smoke alarm was blaring and sending a shrill pain into her brain and the boys were on the floor wrestling as they yelled at each other. She just about made out Murphys threat of '_I'll knock yer fuckin' pan in!_' and Connors retort of '_Yer off yer fuckin' nut, ye wee gobshite!_' over the smoke alarm. The food had been forgotten and was burning on the stove, the water boiling over and bubbling all over the place. She never knew just how bad burnt stew smelt. She didn't even think it was possible to burn it. But the boys had proved her wrong.

She stared for a moment in shock, her mind trying to figure out what problem needed to be dealt with first; the alarm, the food or the two Irish boys wailing on each other. It didn't look like there were in killing each other territory yet so she put the booze down, running to the food, turning off the stove. Then she grabbed one of their new chairs, grimacing at standing on it with her dirty boots as she turned it off. She jumped down and walked over to the boys, keeping a safe distance so they didn't knock her on her ass. It seemed they were too wrapped up in each other to notice she was even back, she doubted they even heard the fucking alarm over their shouting and cursing at each other.

They were on the floor, limbs tangled as Connor was on top of his brother trying to pin his arm onto Murphy's throat and Murphy was shoving his arm away whilst bucking wildly. She was never sure if the two would have a real fight, who would actually win. Murphy was dangerous when he was actually pissed off, but she had witnessed Connors fury at his brother and she knew he could be just as deadly. And weirdly enough, Murphy had submitted to him easily, no doubt because he knew he was wrong. She was brought out of her thoughts when Murphy managed to flip them over and delivered a hard right hook to Connors jaw with a fucking battle cry. She knew things were getting far too serious now and she had to intervene but she didn't want to approach them and end up like Rocco.

"Hey!" She yelled, her voice echoing off the walls in the small loft. They were unaffected though as Connor kicked Murphy and sent him flying backward, his back hitting the floor with a grunt. Connor pounced on him, mirroring his brother as he delivered a firm left hand punch to Murphy face. Her poor boys, their poor beautiful faces. She almost whined.

"Fucking stop it!" She bellowed horrified with how much it was getting out of hand. What the fuck had she missed?

They still didn't stop though, grabbing at each other and rolling around trying to get one up on each other. She was panicking, maybe she'd finally see who would fucking win in that fight she thought about. She ran to the sink, filling up an empty saucepan up of cold water before she walked back to them, throwing the freezing water on the pair. They shouted out in unison, shocked and now cold, snapping out of their stupidity. Connor who was on top of his brother, collapsed next to him, the pair lay there panting and trying to catch their breath.

"What in the ever loving fuck _was that_?!" Lila practically screamed at them, glaring bloody murder at the pair. They ignored her yet again and it was only serving to piss her off more. Connor stood up, not looking at her, he was soaked, as was his brother and he reached a hand out, Murphy grasping it as he let him pull him up. You wouldn't know the two were beating the holy hell out of each other just seconds before, Connor pulled Murphy into a hug, muttering something in what sounded like Russian to him as he cradled his head. Murphy muttered back and held on tightly before they moved away from each other, and they were...wait what? They're smiling?

Lila felt ready to fucking burst and the twins turned to look at her, their smiles faltering as if they only just realised the girl was there and her face was even worse then when they had fucked her over. She was still holding the saucepan and Murphy wondered idly if she was going to beat them to death with it. The pairs clothes were all rumpled and their hair was all over the place, their chests still heaving slightly.

"The fuck was that?!" She screamed again, her voice so loud they winced.

"Nothin' te worry about lass, just a squabble that got outta hand is all." Connor said carefully, his eyes also drawn to the pan in her hand.

"A squabble? A SQUABBLE?! You're both gonna be fucking bruised tomorrow!" She looked like she might spontaneously combust and it took all their willpower not to be amused by how angry she was at them for beating on each other. It was like being back home with Ma all over again. Murphy grabbed his own jaw and worked it a little, it was already hurting like a bitch. The twins glanced to each other, smirks spreading across their faces before looking back at her.

"Aye." They said in unison. Lila squinted at the weird prideful looks, like they were proud they had hit each other hard enough to bruise each other. She knew the assholes were competitive but she'd never seen them actually fight before, she wasn't sure if this was a regular thing or not, she wanted to ask Rocco.

She pinched the bridge of her nose and inhaled deeply, trying to calm herself. They were obviously okay and there was no real damage done. They didn't seem mad at each other and she had initially thought there was some serious issue going on.

"And what exactly was this _squabble_ about?" She asked slowly like she was talking to children, looking like she wanted to throttle the pair or them. The boys started talking over each other and she could just about understand who was saying what. Murphys version seemed to be that Connor had poured boiling water on his hand '_on fuckin' purpose m'girl, I swear it'_, a fact Connor denied til he was blue in the face. Connors version was that Murphy had called him '_a_ _fuckin' shtate pox-bottle, can ye believe that lass?!'_. She almost laughed, almost, and she had a sneaking feeling that Connor's version was far more accurate because she could just imagine Murphy insulting his brother in such an offensive way.

They were still talking over each other and then it escalated to smacking each others arms and across the head. She wondered how the fucking hell their mother ever put up with this shit all the time, she imagined they were worse as children. Or at least she hoped they were, the thought of them getting worse with age made her blanche a little. Although she could see them in a nursing home at 80 years old, beating the shit out of each other with their walking sticks.

"Enough!" She yelled, holding her hands up and silencing the twins. They looked at her with wide eyes like naughty children and waited for her to speak.

"I guess we're having fucking take out then." She sighed as she grabbed the menu from the top of the fridge, plonking onto the couch with a dramatic sigh. The boys warily followed her, sitting on either side of her.

"Sorry Lila." They said, once more in unison. It was too cute for her to stay mad at them. The men seemed like young boys more than half the time, and as long as they didn't permanently damage one another, she guessed they were fine. At least the fucking table stayed in tact this time.


	15. Chapter 15

**Bar fights, nurse Lila and some fluff.**

Three days had passed by since Lila witnessed the twins beating the crap out of each other for barely any reason. Things had returned mostly to normal. Their playful teasing banter had returned and they were at ease with each other once again. She was back to being called 'love', 'sweetheart' and even 'm'girl'. After Murphy had slipped up a few times with saying it, he came to realise that there was no way she hadn't heard him at least once and she never mentioned it, she never acted like she didn't like it. It made his chest swell with...something. He wasn't quite sure but it was nice. The only thing that hadn't gone back to normal were the twins affectionate touching. After what they did, the felt like they had no right to do that anymore, more so Murphy. He was half expecting the girl to turn around and say she couldn't forgive him after all and leave at any moment. He didn't talk about it though, at least not to her. She had asked they all move on from it after all. He had spoken to his twin about it though and Connor had told him to just count his blessings and move on, just like Lila wanted. So he was trying.

Lila was lay on her belly in Murphys bed, her legs swinging a little behind her as she read one of Connors books from his pile; Titus Andronicus by Shakespeare. It had always been her favorite play by the man and she was pleasantly surprised to find it in Connors pile. She never would have pegged Connor as a reader, any of the boys really. But living with them had made her learn alot about the twins. They were similar in a lot of ways, they were twins of course. They walked the same, they were so synchronised it was insane, lighting smokes the same way at the same time, taking shots at the same time. When they told their dramatic stories, they finished each other sentences, and they'd often speak in unison. Sometimes it was like they were one person split in half. But they weren't. They also had very big differences which most people never really got to see as they didn't get close enough to notice. Connor loved to read, Shakespeare was one of his favourites much to her delight, he loved his movies, especially the westerns that Murphy loved to take the ever loving piss out of him for. He loved cars although he had never had the pleasure of owning one. He preferred cold weather to hot and he liked his pizza with mushrooms on. Murphy loved music, mainly rock or grunge, he loved anything art based, especially lowbrow art pieces and photography. He had told her how he always wanted to try his hand at photography but he could never afford a camera. He wasn't much of a reader but he actually loved to write, much to her surprise. He wouldn't tell her what he wrote though and he seemed weird and secretive about it and she got the distinct feeling that even Connor might not know about it. Maybe he feared his brother would rib him for it, but she knew Connor wouldn't. Connor appreciated any literature from plays, novels and even poetry. She hoped maybe one day Murphy would share his work with her and even his brother. He preferred warmer weather to cold and he liked his pizza with pepperoni.

The twins were sat on Connors bed, writing a letter to their Ma which she thought was fucking adorable. She knew the twins rang their mother at least once a week, and if they missed calling her at that exact hour, she would call them instead, usually giving them shit. Yet they still liked to write to her. Lila turned the page of the book, engrossed in her reading, and she could vaguely register the twins bickering as they snatched the paper from one another to write something down. She was sure by this point the letter probably didn't make any sense. Her ears perked up when she registered something being said about the boy's birthday coming up on Friday. They hadn't mentioned it to her yet, she figured they wouldn't. It would be obvious on the night as she imagined they would go out to McGinty's and have a good old knees up. But she wondered if they wouldn't tell her beforehand so she wouldn't buy them something. They always acted so weird about her buying things, even groceries. She didn't mind, she didn't have rent or bills to pay now and she wanted to help out when she could, but they always got so fucking offended when she did. She smirked to herself as she continued to read, already forming an idea in her mind about what she could get them. She had been able to save up her cash since she had nothing to pay with it and surprisingly, McGinty's paid really well, even with it being a part time job. She got paid overtime for working weekends too and by now she had a nice amount of money saved up, and she couldn't think of a better occasion to spend it than to treat the boys for their birthday. She just needed to keep it a secret and with Connors gift, she would need to enlist Rocco's help. She'd have to threaten him to keep his mouth shut though, but luckily for her, he had seen how scary she could be when she had the fight with Murphy.

Rocco had been coming over every day which was nice, the four of them made quite a group. The boys were off for a week, paid leave, since some of the machines in the factory weren't working and needed emergency repairs. So she had a whole week with them. She was excited but she still felt ever so slightly awkward. She had noticed how the boys had distanced themselves physically. Hell at this point Rocco was more affectionate since he hugged her whenever he saw her, yet the boys never did anymore. She hadn't hugged them either, she figured that they were not affectionate anymore because there was too much water under the bridge. When they used to be affectionate, she didn't think anything of it, she thought it was because they were close friends. But now she knew better, it was because they liked her as more than a friend and now too much had happened for them to want that with her.

She glanced over to them just in time to see Murphy smack the pen out of Connors' hand petulantly and Connor looked ready to throttle him until Lila burst out laughing. They turned to watch her, their annoyance melting and turning to smiles as she sat up and closed the book.

"You two are like children." She snorted as she stood up and stretched her arms above her head. She was still only in Murphy's shirt, they'd had a lazy day today and the boys were only in their jeans.

"Are not." They both muttered, making her huff a laugh. She missed how their eyes were drawn to her legs when the shirt rode up her thighs as she stretched. She glanced at the clock, seeing it was time for her to get ready for work and she grabbed her jeans, shimmying into them. The boys were silent as they watched her intently. She grabbed her dark green tee and turned around, pulling Murphy's shirt over her head before slipping hers on instead.

"_Elle est foutrement belle _(She's fucking beautiful)." Connor muttered in French, his eyes not leaving Lila despite the words directed as his brother.

"_Je sais, je veux mordre à pleines cuisses _(I know, I want to sink my teeth into her fucking thighs)." Murphy murmured, looking at her like he was about to pounce on her as he rubbed his lower lip with his thumb. Connor looked at Murphy incredulously at his bold words before he barked out a laugh and shook his head. He wasn't fucking wrong though, Connor felt the same. Lila turned around to face them again as she took her hair down and ran her fingers through it. Murphy was grateful, he hoped she would wear it down today.

"You know I hate it when you two do that shit." She huffed as she gave them a pointed look.

"Ye don't like French love? Most lasses love it.," Murphy gave her a wicked smile that actually made her blush a little, a fact that didn't go unnoticed by the boys as they shot each other sly smirks. She crossed her arms over her chest and tilted her head at him.

"I'm sure they do. I'm glad you two villains use your superpowers for evil and not for anything good." She snorted, making her way to her boots. The boys laughed as they stood up, each grabbing their owns shirts and getting dressed. Lila sat on a chair and put her boots on, lacing them up.

"Wouldn't call it evil per se, would you Murph?" Connor smirked, noticing the way Lilas' eyes were drawn to him and his brother as they dressed.

"Nay brother, the lasses seemed te love it. They all seem te find God soon enough after." He cackled, making the girl blush more and snort loudly as Connor rumbled a laugh.

"You two are impossible, seriously." She grinned, pinching Murphy's side as she walked passed and causing him to yelp a little. Connor grinned at him, he always loved it when the lass picked on his brother and not him instead. Murphy just shot him an indigent scowl.

The walk to McGinty's was uneventful, apart from the usual bickering from the twins and the occasional smacks across the others head over Lilas' shoulders. Connor clipped her head by accident one time and Murphy took great delight in telling him he was an awful person for it, knowing Connor felt guilty about it. Connor almost retorted with how he had done so by accident, whereas Murphy had manhandled the poor lass so rough that he had left marks on her. Because yes, Connor had seen the marks his brother left on their lass and it had taken his immense amount of self control and restraint not to put his fist through his stupid twins face. But he didn't, and he didn't because Lila had asked him that day not to hurt Murphy. She hadn't used words, but with the look and shake of her head when Connor was ready to well and truly put Murphy in his place, he knew she didn't want him to hurt his brother.

They sat at the bar and watched Lila work with such ease, the boys questioned if she was born in an Irish pub and forced to work there as soon as she left the womb. Not long after they got there, Rocco had joined them, sitting next to Murphy as they all drank and had a laugh. They had been there for only an hour when the boys suddenly felt a sense of foreboding, making the hairs on the back of their necks prickle up. They glanced to each other, knowing they both felt it, a change in the air. Something was coming, they didn't know what but trouble was definitely on its way. Rocco didn't feel the same sense of foreboding as the brothers, but he knew them well enough to pick up on their energy that shit was about to hit the fan. The twins had this way of somehow knowing when something was going to go wrong. The boys were shocked when they glanced to Lila to see that she too had felt it. She stood tense, her usual smile gone as she glared at the doors like she just knew something was on its way to fuck up everyone's night. When she turned to look at the twins, they knew she definitely felt it too. It never ceased to amaze them how she always seemed to be on the same wavelength as them, just like how she knew about the telepathy even though they never mentioned it. It was like the three of them were linked somehow, not as strong as Connor and Murphy's connection, but it was still there. The other people at the bar seemed oblivious to the trouble that was coming their way but the boys and Rocco sat tense and waiting, Lila back to watching the door.

It opened with a bang and six rowdy guys filtered in, they looked like some kind of college frat boys and they were being loud and obnoxious. Five of them went to sit in a booth, laughing loudly and being generally annoying. They were all so out of place and they were all drunk already. A muscular blonde guy walked over to the bar, he gave Lila a very obvious once over with a cocky smirk and she bristled. She held back the urge to snarl at him. She couldn't muster up her usual smile like she did for all her other customers. There was something off about this guy and his friends, she could just feel it. Murphy went to jump off his stool, ready to pounce on the fucker for looking at Lila that way, it was obvious she was uncomfortable with it. His rage had missed simmering and boiling and shot straight to murderous. Connor gripped Murphy's forearm, making him stay seated. It wasn't that he thought the lass would be upset if they intervened. He knew this wasn't like before, this was unwanted attention. But he had no intention of making a scene just yet with the other five just there. He knew he and Murphy could take them, they also had Rocco to have their back and he didn't doubt for a second that the other patrons of the bar would help, not with how much they had grown to love Lila. He just wanted to hold off on the impending bar fight that he could taste on his tongue.

Murphy growled, the sound rumbling from his chest and Connor squeezed his arm tighter in response as a warning. The pair were glaring at the man as Rocco watched on, waiting for the brothers lead.

"What can I get you?" Lila asked, disdain dripping from every word she said. The boys were close enough to be able to hear her. The man seemed unfazed by her tone and he licked his lower lip, still smirking at her.

"Six beers and six shots of whiskey. Oh… and your number." He grinned cockily. Lila pursed her lips and quirked a brow at his boldness to almost demand her number but she didn't say a word. She gave him a sickly sweet smile that left the twins and Rocco all looking a little confused at her sudden change of demeanor. She set about making the drinks and the boys watched in horror as she scribbled something on a napkin. Surely she just hadn't actually given the prick her number? She handed it to him and he looked all too pleased with himself, that was until he glanced at it. He tossed the napkin at her and she smirked, watching him scowl at her.

"Really? '_Go_ _fuck_ _yourself'_? What happened to service with a smile bitch?" He scoffed at her. The word bitch seemed to linger in the air and Murphy was ready to tear Connors arm off if he didn't let the fuck go. This time it was Connor who growled.

"How about service with a 'go to hell'?" Lila sneered at him. She knew she was being rude but she didn't care.

The man's eyes darkened as he glared at her.

"Now listen here you little whore, you-" It was as soon as the second offensive word left his lips that Connors' hand released his brother, almost as if he was releasing a wild dog on command to attack, and Murphy flew out of his seat instantly. He charged at the man, knocking him right onto his back as Murphy's fist collided with his face, over and over again whilst he yelled all kinds of curse words and offensive terms. It was all a blur, a flurry of movements and Lila stepped back looking shocked. The man's friends ran over and Connor was on one in an instant, Rocco on another. Another man grabbed Murphy, throwing him off the guy who was now unconscious and Murphy got a punch to the face.

"Murph!" Connor yelled, he started to run over to him but was intercepted by one of the men, he got a punch to the gut but he recovered quick enough to lay the asshole down. Murphy was fighting viciously with the man who had punched him, he was a big fuck but Murphy was relentless in his anger. Watching his brother being hurt only served to fuel the fire inside of him. A few other regulars at the bar jumped in, helping the boys out, and it felt like as quick at it had started, it was now over, with six knocked out assholes lay on the floor.

Lila looked between the boys, Murphy's nose was bleeding and she hoped it wasn't broken and Connor had a wicked black eye already coming through and he was clutching his side as he tried to breathe. Murphy went right over to his brother, the both of them not needing words as they checked in with one another. They were fine, they won and they'd most certainly live. It wasn't their first bar fight and they doubted it would be their last. Rocco had managed to come out with only a sore jaw and the other patrons were unharmed since they had outnumbered the men in the end. Lila was almost in shock. In all her times working in bars, she'd never witnessed a bar fight before, especially not ones with people she cared about in the middle of it. The boys looked at her, making sure she was okay, and she snapped out of her stupor. She darted off into the back of the pub and the boys hearts sank, feeling like she was upset with them. They sat in a booth with Rocco and suddenly Lila was there again with a first aid kit. Relief flooded them as she opened it, looking from one to another as if deciding who to treat first. She looked worried and sad and they hated that look on her angelic face.

"Murphy first lass." Connor muttered, reaching out and squeezing her hand. None of them thought about how it was the first physical contact they'd had since the awful night, there was too much going on to even register that.

Murphy looked to Connor with a frown. He knew Connor didn't say to treat him first because he was worse, it was just what Connor did. He always looked out for Murphy like a big brother. Always putting Murphy first. Lila stood in front of Murphy, dowsing some cotton swabs with alcohol. She took his jaw gently and tilted his face up to hers. He blinked up at her, admiring her beautiful face. He just wanted to grab her and throw her on the table to claim her. Watching that pricks eyes roam her body like that, coupled with the adrenaline from the fight, it made him a little horny if he was honest. She lifted the swab but hesitated like she didn't want to hurt him, he could read her like a book as she furrowed her brow and looked at his bloody nose.

"It's alright m'girl, just do it." He encouraged, giving her a grin. It hurt, of course it did, but he always felt better after a good fucking fight. To unleash the anger that was always bubbling at the surface inside of him. He and his brother often enjoyed the adrenalin of the fights and afterwards they always felt almost giddy. Lila soon realised this too as Connor had got up with Rocco and was talking and laughing to the others in the bar animatedly.

She wiped his nose and he winced a little. It turned out his nose wasn't broke, but there was a gash on it that was oozing blood. Her frown deepened as she cleaned it.

"I'm sorry Murph." She whispered regretfully as she cleaned him up. Murphy quirked a brow at her as he looked at her confused.

"What for love?" He asked softly, one of his hands reaching out and winding around the wrist that was holding his jaw lightly.

"If I wasn't rude to him…" She sighed, setting the swab down as she got some butterfly strips and put them over the gash. It wasn't too deep to require proper stitches.

"Hush now girl, ye didn't do a thing wrong. He was a wrong'un, I know ye felt it too. He woulda found a reason te cause trouble anyway." He said sincerely, pinning her with his intense gaze. She let go of his face and stepped back just a little and Murphys hand trailed down her wrist to her hand, linking his fingers with hers. It was obvious that seeing him and his brother getting roughed up a little had upset her.

She glanced down to their hands and noticed his bloody knuckles and frowned once more. She moved to sit opposite him, their hands still linked. She let go to grab more swabs and pour alcohol on them, taking his hand carefully as she cleaned his knuckles as gently as she could. It stung like a motherfucker but he didn't let it show. He just watched her quietly as she worked, seeing the concern she had for him all over her face. It made his heart ache. When she was done, she stood up and he did too. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, winding a hand into her hair. He felt her relax in his arms and squeezed her a little. When she moved away, she looked up, searching his face to make sure he was okay.

"We're fine m'girl, been through worse aye? Just look at Connor." He smiled reassuringly, she turned to his brother across the bar who seemed to be having way too much fun reenacting the fight with the others and she snorted a little. She glanced back up at Murphy and he could see some of her worry melting away and he smiled brightly at her. His hand cupped her cheek, his thumb stroking it affectionately and her hand came up to his. He half expected her to push his hand away so he was pleasantly surprised when her hand just lay over his and she leant into his touch.

"We'll always defend yer honor love." He smiled mischievously at her, making her huff a laugh. She moved away and shoved him lightly.

"Go, send the next patient over." She smiled ruefully at him. He was glad he'd made her smile. She had no need to worry about him or his brother. He stepped forwards, placing a soft caring kiss on her cheek. His lips lingered for a moment and she closed her eyes, feeling the warmth spread through her body. She'd fucking missed this with them. He pulled away almost regretfully and gave her a smile before he went off and told Connor to get his sorry ass over to her.

Connor sauntered over, a buzz in his veins from the fight. He flashed her a dazzling grin as he sat down.

"Do be gentle with me nurse Lila." He smirked cheekily at her, making her huff a laugh at him and shake her head. She took his chin in her hands like she had done to his brother, tilting his head to examine his face. He had a black eye but no cuts to his face.

"Up." She demanded, gesturing for him to stand so she could check his ribs. He complied and lifted his shirt, he was bruising already. She carefully ran her fingers over his ribs and he shivered at her touch. It didn't hurt too bad and after a few pokes, she concluded nothing was broken. But she wasn't a doctor so what the fuck did she know? She sat in the booth and took his hand, making him sit as she cleaned his knuckles like how she did to Murphy. She was silent and Connor watched her carefully. He could see the whole thing had affected her.

"Talk te me lass." He pleaded softly, looking at her worried. She glanced to him and scoffed, seeing how concerned he was.

"Are you kidding me? You and your brother get roughed up and you're worried about _me_?" She asked incredulously, shaking her head.

Connor frowned and stood up, pulling her up by her hand to stand with him. She blinked up at him as his hands came to either side of her face, making her look at him. His gaze pierced her, pinning her in place with those blue eyes.

"Me and Murph will always worry about ye, make no mistake sweetheart." He said seriously, no mirth in his eyes or tone. She took a shaky breath and nodded, looking down unable to hold the weight of his gaze. He leant forward and placed a sweet kiss to her forehead, and much like Murphy had, his lips lingered for a moment and she felt the familiar warmth once again. When he moved away he gave her a beaming grin.

"Ready te play nurse te Roc now? Only his knuckles need lookin' at but, between you and me, I think he'll milk it so the pretty nurse can dote on him." He chuckled mischievously, making her roll her eyes playfully.

"Send him over." She snorted, batting Connors arm softly. He gave her one last smile before he walked off.

"Aye Roc! Nurse Lila will see ye now!" He cackled loudly, making her shake her head.


	16. Chapter 16

**MacManus birthday time. Murphys overwhelmed by his gift and Connor freaks out.**

**Some major feels in this one, not all of them good.**

It was Friday, the boy's birthday, and as she presumed, they hadn't told her about it. She hadn't let on to them that she knew, or else her surprises would be ruined. She felt so excited to give them their gifts. She had always got great joy out of buying things for people and surprising them, she loved the looks on peoples faces and how happy she had made them. Rocco had thankfully helped her with Connors gift and he even kept his mouth shut. He feared if he didn't she just might kill him. When he found out what she was buying the boys, he was a little shocked to say the least, she was really going to town on spoiling those two fuck faces. But it made him happy that she cared about them enough to do this for them. It was hard for her to keep it from the boys, they had both been sour about her spending time with Rocco without them.

_The boys sat on their couch side by side, matching indignant scowls on their faces as they glared a hole through the piece of paper in Connors hands._

_Gone for breakfast with Rocco, be back later._

_Lila xoxox_

"_Why the fuck weren't we invited?!" Murphy asked incredulously, so fucking offended that Lila had gone out to eat with Rocco and left them behind. It was the day after the bar fight, and when they woke this morning, they found Lila gone and instead a note. _

"_I think we should go and fuckin' find out." Connor huffed, equally offended as his twin. Lila hadn't told them she had arranged to meet Rocco alone. It wasn't that they might get jealous, they would and she knew it, they got jealous of anyone she spoke to that wasn't them it seemed. But she knew if she told them, they'd just fucking come along anyway and she wanted some time with her friend alone for a change, he'd be helping her with Connors gift and she needed to keep it from them. She felt like she never got any time with Rocco that wasn't with the twins and as much as she loved them, sometimes she needed a nice chat to someone that wasn't them. Connor and Murphy didn't think anything suspicious was happening between the pair. They knew Rocco didn't have a death wish and they were more than sure Lila didn't think of Rocco that way. But still, the fact they had been left out made them sulk._

_When Lila had returned afterwards, to find the brooding twins, she scolded them for acting like children, she had even brought up their fight to prove her point, and that she was allowed to speak to people that weren't of the MacManus persuasion. Her bringing up the fight had them shutting up quickly and they got the fuck over it, they didn't want to drag all of that back up, not after she had graciously forgiven them. Neither was Lila, and she wasn't really mad, she had simply used it to her advantage knowing they felt too guilty to keep on at her for it and eventually find out about the gift._

She wanted to make sure she spent roughly the same amount on their gifts so it didn't seem like she was playing favorites. This meant Murphy gift was shiny new and top of the range, whereas Connors gift was second hand, although in perfect condition. There was no way she could afford to get Connors gift as new. She hoped he'd understand. She was up before the boys, too excited to continue sleeping. She set their joint birthday card out of sight along with Murphy's gift that was wrapped nicely. Connor gift was much too large to wrap and had to be outside anyway. She cooked them a good hearty breakfast and as she anticipated, the smell of it roused them from sleep as she plated it up. She rarely cooked breakfast for them, she wasn't really a morning person the twins had noticed, so they usually went to the diner. So when they sat up sleepily rubbing their eyes, taking in the sight of Lila cooking, fully dressed and seemingly wide awake, they had an awful feeling the little lass had kept her mouth shut about knowing exactly what day it was.

She glanced over, seeing them getting up and she gave them a bright smile.

"Happy birthday!" She grinned, it didn't waver even as they looked at her suspiciously. Murphy yawned a little and plonked down at the dining table, Connor following suit.

"Lila, lass…" He didn't know what to say. It wasn't that he wasn't grateful she was cooking them breakfast, hell her excitement for their birthday made both the boys smile. But they didn't want her spending anything on them and if she knew, well they fucking knew she would have.

"Hush Connor. I'm excited. Today is about celebrating you two devils being born, so let me have my moment." She snorted, pointing the spatula at them both. Murphy glared at it and looked worried for a moment like she might smack them with it. Her excitement was contagious though and the boys glanced to each other and grinned. It was nice seeing her so happy. She was happier than the day she'd been asked out on that date, and today she was happy just because they had been born, it made them feel fucking special. The groaned appreciatively in unison when large plates piled high with breakfast were placed in front of them, not needing to be told to dig in. Lila joined them with a much smaller plate, she honestly didn't know how they guys ate so much, she wasn't sure where they put it.

She finished her food before them and got up, rummaging around in a kitchen cupboard. The boys watched her curiously as they ate and she suddenly returned with a wrapped box and a card.

"Fuckin' hell Lila, this is why we didn't tell ye, ye didn't need te get us a gift." Connor chided, feeling guilty she had bought them something. She brushed off his protests though, she didn't care what they said, she wanted to treat them so she did.

"This isn't for you, this one is Murphys. Yours is, well...you'll see. But I have to give Murphy's gift first." She looked at him apologetically, like she was scared he would be upset he needed to wait for his gift when in reality he didn't expect one at all.

"Its alright lass." He sighed, trying to quell his annoyance at her spending money on them. He would have suggested that Murphy have his gift first anyway, he did that every birthday since they were younger. He could never enjoy opening his gifts first and having to listen to his brother being a whiny impatient little bitch about it.

Murphy was practically bouncing in his seat with excitement as he looked at the box, wondering what might be inside. Lila grinned at him as she handed it to him, watching intently. Even Connor had to grin at how excited his twin was, it was nice to see. Murphy ripped off the wrapping paper enthusiastically and opened the box. He stilled completely, his smile fading as his eyes widened. He felt a lump start to form in his throat as he glared at the offending object. He didn't know what to expect when he opened it, something cheap but that he would appreciate all the same because it was a gift from her, but not this.

"A...A camera?" He asked, his voice shaking slightly as he glanced at her through his lashes, his eyes watering a little. Connors eyebrows almost flew off his head as he looked from his clearly overwhelmed brother to the lass that had gotten him something he had always dreamed of.

Her face fell, taking his expression as he didn't like it or something and she played with her fingers nervously and couldn't meet his eyes.

"Is it...is it not the right one? I asked in the store what the best one was and she said-" She started to ramble, clearly getting distressed about the fact she had fucked it all up. She was taken off guard when she was suddenly yanked up into a bear hug as Murphy squeezed the air from her lungs. She clutched him tightly, surprised and a little confused, especially as he didn't speak to say if the camera was okay or not. But he buried his face in her neck and sniffled and she could feel the wetness from his tears. Her heart seized up in her chest and she felt her own eyes watering at his gratitude. That he was so overwhelmed he was crying. She hadn't really expected this reaction from him, but then again, he was over emotional on the best of days.

He was holding her in a death grip and she reached up to stroke his hair soothingly.

"Murph?" She questioned softly, hoping he was alright and she hadn't broke the poor boy. He sniffled again and moved away, wiping his eyes as he gave her the biggest smile she had ever seen grace his gorgeous face. His canines poking out to greet her. She beamed up at him, wiping her own eyes feeling overwhelmed herself by how much it had meant to him to get this gift.

"It's fuckin' perfect m'girl, I can't even thank ye enough." He whispered, his voice raspy from crying. He wasn't even embarrassed at crying in front of her or Connor. He had told her in passing how much he wanted to try photography and that he had always wanted a camera, and she had remembered. She remembered and bought him some fancy ass camera and he couldn't even wrap his head around it. It made it extra special that it was off her, that every time he would look at it or use it he would think of her. He would always have a piece of her with him.

Connor had watched the exchange reverently and he wouldn't tell them, but he may have shed a tear or two himself. He was well aware of his brothers desire for a camera and this just wasn't just a random purchase. It was more apparent now that she knew these boys like the back of her hand and cared about them. He wondered idly what his gift might be. Murphy sat back down as he carefully took the camera out of the box and admired it.

"Fuckin' hell Connor, I've got a camera." He snorted incredulously, wiping his eyes again. Connor grinned and pat him on the back, Murphy being happy always brought him the most joy. Hell just seeing his brother like this could have been his own birthday gift and he would consider himself more than lucky.

Lila took a shaky breath to compose herself, she really didn't expect that intense reaction to the gift. She looked at Connor and smiled warmly at him.

"Okay, so your turn. Before I show you though...I just wanna… I wanted to spend the same amount of money on you both, because I care about you equally and I'm not here to play favorites. So Murphy's camera is brand new and state of the art, but yours...it's not beat up or anything, but I wouldn't be able to afford a new one and-" She was nervously rambling again like she genuinely thought she had to explain herself. The boys were touched that she had gone to such lengths to make sure their gifts wouldn't be deemed more expensive than the others, like she didn't want to cause any friction.

"Lila lass, whatever ye got me, I'll love it." Connor interrupted her to reassure her. She looked at him hesitantly and he gave her a beaming smile, she took a breath and returned it.

"Alright well, we need to go outside then." She said, biting her lip with a grin. She was excited to give Connor his gift now. The boys looked to each other confused but shrugged, getting up and throwing on their clothes.

Lila was silent as they made their way down the building and she lead them to the back outside. Murphy was the first to follow her out and his eyes widened, a beautiful incredulous laugh escaping his lips as he saw his brothers gift. Just like Connor, Murphy loved to see his brother happy, and if this didn't make him happy, he didn't know what fucking would. She really did know them well. Connor heard his brothers laugh and all but shoved him out of the way to see, having a Murphy moment of impatience. His eyeballs almost fell out of his head as he looked at the beauty of a Mercedes Benz S500 sat there. It was a navy blue colour and you wouldn't know from looking at it that it wasn't brand new. Connor was rendered speechless and his mouth went bone dry, his eyes glued to the vehicle. Murphy looked to his brother carefully. Connor was always more reserved with his feelings than Murphy and sometimes he was the only one who could really read Connor because he could reach out and feel what he was feeling. And right now, his brother was having a hell of a time stopping himself from crying.

Lila watched him intently, waiting for him to say something or react in some way, any way. He was just stood there, his face unreadable and she started to worry, much like she had with Murphy. She glanced to the darker haired twin, a pleading look and he knew she was asking him for confirmation since she knew that Murphy would know. Murphy grinned and nodded at her, making her relax and then Murphy smacked Connor on the back to snap him out of his stupor. Connor flinched and squinted at him until Murphy gave him a soft look and gestured to the girl stood off to the side, toying with her fingers. He'd noticed she only did that when she was nervous or anxious.

"I can't...I can't accept this Lila." He frowned, shaking his head at her. It must have cost her a fortune and it made him wonder just how much Murphys fucking camera cost if it was the same.

Her face fell visibly, it wasn't really the reaction she was hoping for and Murphy tutted at his brother, walking over to the girl and wrapping an arm around her shoulders as he shot his twin a dirty look.

"It must have cost ye a packet lass, just return it, please?" Connor pleaded, making her heart sink further. His gift had been a pain in the ass to get and she'd needed Rocco's help. She thought he'd be happy with it since he wanted a car so bad. She didn't mean to, but she found herself getting upset. She should have known he would react like this with her when they both hated her spending money, but Murphy had caved and when he saw his gift, he was nothing but grateful for it. She didn't know why Connor wasn't doing the same.

"I can't return it. I'm sure if you don't like it then you can sell it." She stated emotionlessly, moving out of Murphy grasp and shoving the key into Connors hand before she stormed off inside.

Connor squeezed his eyes shut, a lump in his throat emerging. He hadn't meant to upset the lass. It just didn't feel right for her to buy them such gifts and spend so much money on them.

"The fuck was that about, ye wee ungrateful sod?" Murphy hissed at him with a glare. He knew why his brother reacted that way but he could have atleast kept it to him fucking self when the girl clearly went to so much effort.

"Murph." Connor warned, shooting his twin a look.

"No Connor, ye could see how much it meant te her te get us these gifts, all ye had te do was swallow yer fuckin' pride. I could do it with mine." He huffed angrily, hating the image in his head of how her face fell and she looked so sad. Connor clenched his jaw, hating the fact that his brother was right, but he still didn't like the idea.

"She spent a fuckin' fortune on us Murph! Ye really think we deserve it after what we did? Just 'cause yer fuckin' selfish and readily accepted her gift after ye fuckin' marked her up, doesnae mean I have te!" He yelled, his anger getting the best of him in his emotional state.

Murphy took a step back, a hurt look crossing his face and Connor knew he had gone too far. He hadn't really meant it, he didn't know why he had said it.

"Wow, alright. That how it is yeah? I know I don't deserve shit off her, every fuckin' day I think back te what I did and it eats me alive. But she was happy Connor, ye could fuckin' feel it off her. Doin' this for us made _her_ fuckin' happy and I wanted te give her that. Maybe ye should get yer head outta yer ass and take a leaf from yer own book, yer the one that told me te count me blessin's and move on like she asked, yet yer the one fuckin' hung up on it, and now ye've upset the poor girl." The worst part of Murphy's speech was the fact he wasn't even angry, he was hurt and upset that Connor would use that against him, especially as Murphy had told Connor how much it played on his mind. Angry Murphy Connor could deal with, but upset disappointed Murphy was a harder pill to swallow. Murphy shook his head at his twin disappointed before going back inside.

Connor stood there, head hung low. He'd managed to upset the girl and his twin, on their fucking birthday of all days. He knew he could have handled it better. He usually did, he was so in control and collected all the time and he wasn't really sure why he hadn't been able to get a handle on himself. He realised then, the gifts she had gotten them. They meant so much, more than money, more than anything. She knew them so well and got them both something they had only ever dreamed of and would never be able to get for themselves, the act in itself made it clear just how much the pair meant to her, and it had overwhelmed him. He felt like they didn't deserve it, he felt confused by his own feelings for the girl. He and Murphy had never felt this strong about anyone before and after seeing Murphy's reaction to his gift, how it touched him so deeply, his guard had slipped a little. So when he saw the car, his heart had squeezed so painfully tight as he realised he was hopelessly in love with this girl that had walked into their lives. It scared him. It scared him shitless. He'd never felt so vulnerable before and it was almost like accepting the car would be accepting those feelings willingly and just handing over his heart, even though he knew it wasn't the case. They were only friends after all and after what had happened with them all, he doubted she would ever want anything more now. He heaved a sigh, he'd never experienced this whirlwind of emotions before and he knew this was how Murphy was every fucking day and he wondered just how he did it. He unlocked the car and sat inside, hoping to get some peace. But all he felt was the extreme guilt creeping in for hurting her feelings and upsetting his brother.

"FUCK!" He yelled, punching the steering wheel out of frustration. What the fuck was he going to do now?


	17. Chapter 17

**This one's kinda short because the next one will be pretty long, and I don't want to make it even longer by adding this part to it. Hopefully you'll still enjoy it.**

**Murphy talks to Lila about Connor, and Connor tries to fix shit.**

When Murphy got back inside the apartment, he saw Lila at the sink washing the dishes from their wonderful birthday breakfast. His heart ached when he heard her sniffling and he had to fight the strong urge to go down and beat some sense into his brother's thick skull. It was rare that he'd seen Connor act like that, _like_ _him_. Connor always acted so reserved, almost like feelings got in the way. Murphy wondered what that was like. He had always been over emotional. He felt too strongly to the point it overwhelmed him, and now it seemed his brother was getting a taste of what that was like. Murphy wasn't stupid, he'd made his peace a while back that they were both in love with the pretty redhead. The night they had both told her they loved her in different languages. Connor didn't seem to have a memory of it though since he was more inebriated than everyone else and Murphy hadn't mentioned it to his brother. He wondered if he hadn't told Connor because he knew his brain would fucking short circuit and turn him into an asshole.

He wasn't sure what fucking alternate universe they entered on their birthday that warranted his brother being overly emotional and rude and leaving Murphy to do the damage control, but he didn't fucking like it. He wasn't used to being the responsible one. He was much more comfortable screaming at someone or crying like a little bitch. This responsible fixer bullshit, that wasn't his jam. He walked over to Lila, wrapping his arms around her middle and resting his chin on her shoulder. She stopped washing the dishes, relaxing and leaning into him, resting her hand over his on her belly. It made his chest swell that she didn't mind him holding her this way.

"He doesn't mean it m'girl, he's just...overwhelmed. Ye know how he is, ain't used te it." He sighed regretfully, soaking her in as he held her like this. He hadn't done this before and it felt even more intimate than their hugs somehow. Maybe it was how her ass pressed against his cock or the way he had a good view down her top at this angle, he wasn't sure, didn't really fucking care, but he just knew he liked it. Lila had some time to think when she was washing the dishes and she knew deep down Connor hadn't meant to be so rude or hurtful, he wasn't the type to be spiteful, but it still hurt.

"I know. I just...wanted to do something nice for you both." She said sadly.

Murphy let her go, he really didn't want to, he was loving holding her that way, but he wanted to look at her. He turned her around, his hands slowly trailing up her arms, making her suppress a shiver at his touch. She blinked up at him as he looked down at her adoringly, his hands sliding over her shoulders and settling on the sides of her neck, his fingers stroking the base of her skull where her hair started.

"Ye did love, I promise. He just needs some time te wrap his head around it. It's been an emotional mornin' aye?" He smiled softly, she nodded and tried to give him a smile back but it was far too weak for Murphy's liking, so he decided to tell her more. He took her hand and lead her to Connors bed, getting her to sit down and sitting opposite her. He kept a hold of her hand in his, rubbing his thumbs over it.

"Ye already know by now how different we can be m'girl. Ye know how emotional I can get, but Connor...he's never been that way. He's always been so careful, locked away. He ain't really used te lettin' things in, ye know? Sometimes it's like...he acts like feelin's just get in the way or somethin' if its anyone but me. He's usually closed off. I think everythin' just got on top o' him, but he'll be fine. And I can guarantee he's feelin' like shit right now about it." He said sincerely, opening up to her. She was grateful he did. The thing with Murphy was that he opened up to her a lot. It was easier to get information out of him and he had no issues with being honest with her. Connor was always more secretive, a little more closed off like Murphy had said. It was just who they are and she loved them both the way they were.

Lila nodded, his words did help a little and she hoped when his lighter haired counterpart returned he would be in a better mood. It was their birthday after all.

"So...do you like your gift?" She asked carefully, wanting to switch directions to forget the sting of Connors rejection. His beaming smile was an answer of itself and she laughed lightly at how adorable he was.

"Aye m'girl, I fuckin' love it. I can't even...you've made it harder for when yer birthday comes around. We'll have te buy ye a diamond fuckin' ring te top these off." He hadn't really meant to say it, it was as if his subconscious had pushed it out of his mouth after the things he had been thinking, and it was like the air suddenly changed as the words left his mouth. Lila blinked at him for a moment, surely the ring comment had not been meant the way it had sounded, no, she was imagining things obviously. Murphy shifted in his seat, wishing for a time machine so he could go the fuck back and stop himself from blurting that fucking shit out of his mouth. But she hadn't said anything about it, he wondered if she thought he was joking, he fucking hoped so.

He was oh so grateful when the door to the loft opened and Connor walked in, looking guilty as hell and like he was expecting them both to shout at him. Murphy stayed quiet, he wanted to let them sort it the fuck out, he'd have it out with his brother after for the shit he had said to him. Lila looked at him, Connor sucked in a breath seeing the hurt behind her eyes and he sighed. He was once more composed, but he was still feeling the after-effects from his emotional lapse. He walked over hesitantly, stopping beside the bed.

It was all too awkward for any of their likings as Lila and Connor looked at each other. Murphy was looking between them both, waiting for one of them to fucking say something, but they never did. He fought the urge to hit their heads together. He didn't want to say anything, it wasn't really his place, so instead, he opted to reach out to his brother telepathically and give him an urging nudge. Connor glanced to Murphy, clearly feeling it and Murphy gave him a pointed look. It wasn't like Connor to be so fucking difficult.

"M'sorry lass." He finally blurted out. Murphy almost fucking cheered that words had managed to leave his lips. But he could tell by the look on Lila's face that wasn't enough, she wanted an explanation from him. She'd already kind of had one from Murphy, but she wanted to hear from the man himself. Connor tugged his lower lip through his teeth and he shifted on his feet, he felt so fucking uncomfortable. Talking about his feelings with anyone but Murphy was like pulling teeth from him, he hated it.

"I didn't mean te act that way. T'is Murphy's job te overreact, not mine." He started, trying to crack a joke to clear the air, even if it was an awful one. Murphy snorted a little and shook his head.

"I just...I got overwhelmed lass, and I hope ye can forgive me. I love the car, I promise ye I do. And I can't ever think o' a proper way te thank ye. I shouldn't have acted like I was ungrateful, 'cause that ain't the case, I was just shocked is all." He, of course, left out the part about realising he was in love with her, that wasn't really the talk he wanted to have today. The answer was good enough for Lila though, he'd practically told her just what Murphy had but she needed to hear it from him. She gave him a warm smile and a nod and Murphy could see the tension slip away from Connor as he returned the smile.

The door knocked and Lila got up to answer it, making her out of earshot of the brothers.

"No apology for me then brother?" Murphy huffed with a glare as he stood up. Connor heaved a sigh and looked guilty as he looked away from his brother.

"Ye know I didn't mean it Murph." He said regretfully. Murphy scoffed and shook his head. He knew he was overreacting, but as Connor had said, it was what Murphy did. He had been hurt terribly by his twin throwing what he did to Lila in his face, especially since Connor knew just how much it bothered Murphy.

"Is it really that hard for ye te just fuckin' say it?" Murphy asked with a frown. Connor didn't have time to reply though as they were both grabbed into a bear hug by their favourite hairy friend.

"Happy birthday fuck faces! Enjoy the treats from your girl?" Rocco grinned, moving away and frowning a little at their faces.

"The fuck did I miss?" He asked confused, glancing between the two sour faces.

"The usual MacManus drama." Lila snorted as she walked over to the oven, grabbing a plate full of food she had made and left there to keep warm for her friend. He beamed a smile as he sat at the table and started devouring it, muttering how the boys should have a birthday every day if he got treated like this.

Lila looked at the boys and walked out to the fire escape, and they knew to follow. When they joined her, she tilted her head and looked them both over.

"I don't know what was said after I left, but you two sort it the fuck out because it's your birthday. I'm not having you fighting on your birthday like this, or any day for that matter. You both know deep down you love each other, whatever was said doesn't matter, it doesn't change that. Now kiss and make up." She demanded before she climbed back in the window to leave them to it. The boys watched after her with raised brows, once again shocked that she knew something was amiss with them and wanted them to patch it up. Even in their brief casual relationships, the lasses seemed like they wanted to tear the brothers apart, even making comments about their closeness and how it was weird. Trying to turn the brothers against each other. Yet here Lila was, always demanding them to make up and hating it when they fought. They were grateful for her, and once again they were reminded of their Ma, they knew she would like the fiery lass.

"Look Murphy I'm sorry, alright? Ye know I didn't mean it, I lashed out. I think ye know better than anyone that ye don't always mean what ye say when ye lash out." Connor sighed, looking at his brother apologetically. Murphy inhaled deeply, calming himself for Lila's sake. He could easily stay mad at his twin for about a week or more for this, that's how stubborn he was, but for Lila, he decided to let it go. He nodded and gave his brother a smile, it widened and Connor pulled him into a hug. When they moved away, Connor pat his cheek affectionately.

"We're lucky bastards aye? A fuckin' camera and a car." Connor laughed incredulously, Murphy grinned as he looked through the window at Lila talking to Rocco with a smile on her face.

"Aye, real lucky." He beamed, ruffling Connors hair with a laugh before he climbed in the window, listening to Connor grumble behind him.


	18. Chapter 18

**Boys will be boys.**

**The birthday night doesn't go to plan as the twins fuck up **_**again**_**. Even Rocco's pissed at them.**

**Don't hate meeee lololol, this one's kinda important to help get things moving along to where you all want it to be so, bare with me! There's a method to my madness I promise!**

The four of them spent most of the day lounging about the loft until it was time for Lila to work at McGinty's. The boys and Rocco already started drinking but Lila did not since she had work. Aileen would let her finish earlier today though and she knew they would all be staying at McGinty's longer than usual. She knew the boys used to stay there until the early hours of the morning, but since she moved in with them, they just left after her shift since she was usually tired. They much preferred to go back home with her, even if they didn't really do anything other than sleep. A lot of people would be there tonight, even Doc would be there. She'd met the man a few times and he was lovely, but he was still a little shook up from his fall, having Lila to help Aileen at the bar meant he didn't have to work as much and he was grateful.

Lila had shooed the boys out early. Her shift started at 8 and she sent the boys off around 6. She wanted to get ready without them pestering her. She was actually going to make an effort today. Her style was always a little edgy but comfort meant more to her than anything, so she practically lived in her jeans and t-shirts along with her Doc Marten boots. Tonight she was going for a more vampy look. It was the kind of thing she used to wear before becoming a carer for her granda when her friends would take her clubbing in New York, she always got a lot of attention like this. She didn't think she was ugly, but she didn't think she was the prettiest girl around. She felt like a troll next to the twins just simply because in her eyes, they were the most beautiful humans on the fucking planet.

She turned to the side to admire herself in the mirror, she always felt better dressed up like this, she wished she wasn't too lazy to make the effort to do it every day. She was wearing skin tight high waisted black jeans with high wedge black heels. They had some buckles and spikes on them, giving her the edgy vibe she always had. For her top, she decided on being a little more risque than usual. She had wanted an occasion to wear this top ever since she bought it. It was a black bralette. It had a deep v neck, giving her a lovely cleavage with her just a little above average breast size for her tiny frame. It had lace trim along the bottom and there was a couple of inches of skin showing before her jeans started. It was sexy, but it wasn't sluttish. It was always a fine line but she managed it every time. Her red hair was down, she had blow dried it instead of letting it dry naturally and it had made it look thicker, her waves even deeper giving it an almost crimped look. The look was topped off by a headband with a large black bow on it and a thin black choker to frame her elegant neck. She looked good, she grinned to herself at her surge in confidence.

For her makeup, she did simple winged liner, she usually only used mascara. Her bright blue eyes were framed with a rim of kohl liner too, making her eyes stand out even more. She didn't bother with foundation, she didn't really need it, and her lips were painted a deep, almost black matte red colour, making her lips look even poutier. She grabbed her leather biker jacket, feeling like it fit with the outfit, and then she grabbed her usual messenger bag. She still looked like the usual edgy Lila, but more grown up and a bit vampy.

Lila was going to be pissed as shit. Rocco knew it, he fucking knew it and he was on edge waiting for her. He was sat in a booth with the boys, but they weren't alone. The turn out to McGinty's had been crazy. It seemed that most people that had ever met the twins had somehow found out it was their birthday and turned up. This included the two girls currently groping at the brothers through their clothes and giggling like fucking annoying bitches. He found it amusing how protective of Lila he had gotten. She was his friend, she meant a lot to him. And he knew she wouldn't be happy one fucking bit with this fucking scene. He found it mighty hypocritical of the boys to be doing this whilst they chased off all the guys that liked Lila. Connor had a bleach blonde bitch glued to his side, she was stroking his thigh and giggling as Connor whispered things in her ear that Rocco was sure he didn't want to fucking hear. Murphy's girl had dyed black hair that just made her look like she was on death's door. She was straddling him, actually straddling him as she kissed his neck, his hands on her ass. He didn't understand how the twins had seemed to just forget Lila like that. He knew they were piss drunk already, but so was he and even he had the sense to know this was fucking shitty to do. After all she had done for them, the gifts and everything. These bitches had nothing on Lila, and he didn't know why the guys were even interested. But he soon got distracted when said bitches friend came along, some brown haired beauty. And soon enough Rocco had his own things on his mind, like the girl's tongue down his throat.

The boys didn't really think too much into it, since they were three sheets to the wind already. When the girls had approached them, being all touchy-feely, it was like their brains switched off and their bodies took over. Of course they cared about Lila, but they hadn't seen any lasses since she came onto the scene and it didn't seem like she was interested anymore. Both of them were incredibly sexually frustrated, it had been the longest they'd gone without fucking sex and Murphy wondered if that was why he was extra angry recently. If they didn't have beer goggles on, they probably wouldn't have even spoken to the girls, but they did, the girls were decent and would be a good fuck, that much was sure. They didn't seem to have any qualms about getting hot and heavy in front of everyone.

Lila got a few catcalls and whistles on her way and she smirked to herself. The heels forced her to walk with her hips swaying more and apparently the men liked it. She knew she looked good, she felt fucking good. She always carried herself well, graceful and a slight swagger to her steps. She looked confident and she smiled as she pushed the door open to McGintys. The first thing she saw was Aileen at the bar and the woman's eyes widened, looking her over before grinning widely. She loved this look on the girl and Aileen had witnessed the two boys, she was disgusted with them and she knew seeing Lila like this would be a nice slap across their faces. Her heels clicked on the floor as she walked and she could feel all the eyes looking at her, but she didn't acknowledge it. The bar was mostly full of males.

"Ye look amazin' sweetheart!" Aileen smirked at her as Lila reached the bar.

"Thanks Aileen, have you seen the boys?" She asked with a smile. Aileen's face fell and she noticed it instantly and she frowned. She was about to ask what's wrong but Aileen gestured to the booth. Lila looked over, her heart sinking as she saw Murphy with some bitch in his lap as they made out. Connor was with another, he was kissing her neck and Lila was sure her hand was down his fucking pants. Rocco sat at the end with someone kissing him seemingly in his own little world. She inhaled deeply, reminding herself they were friends, to quell the deep ache in her chest with the jealousy. It stung like a bitch, after what they had done to her, this was the shit they wanted to play. Fine. Fuck them both. She turned away and Aileen looked at her carefully, reaching out and squeezing her hand.

"Their loss Lila." She muttered sympathetically.

Lila braved a smile and nodded.

"Yeah, it is their loss. Fuck them. I'm sure I can find someone to keep me company after I'm done with work." She grinned and making Aileen laugh loudly, she wasn't wrong, Aileen had no doubt she could. Everyone _else_ was staring at the girl.

Lila went into the back, taking her leather jacket off and coming back and started working. Someone on the other side of the bar catcalled her and she snorted to herself. The noise made the boys look over, they had finally come up for air but the girls' hands were still on them. By this point Rocco's girl had passed out, seemingly more intoxicated than he thought, he tried not to let that hurt what little self-esteem he had left. If the three of them were in a cartoon, their jaws would have been on the floor whilst their eyes popped out as they saw Lila behind the bar serving people. The twins knew she was pretty, hell she was beautiful even after she just woke with a hangover. But this was something else. They'd never seen her look so sexy before. Everything from her makeup, hair and her outfit exuded fucking sex appeal and the boys couldn't take their eyes off her. Even Rocco was staring at her. The men around the bar were practically fighting for her attention and she laughed at them, shaking her head. The bitches with the boys got a little jealous of their staring and soon enough their attention was distracted once more with hands down their pants. Although the boys would be liars if they tried to say they didn't keep looking over at the girl, wishing it was her that was touching them.

Lila kept glancing over to the twins even though she knew she shouldn't. She didn't expect this when she came to work today and if the boys' faces were anything to go by, she'd have to find somewhere else for the night because they'd be taking the tramps back with them. She wouldn't have minded so much since they were supposed to be friends, the jealousy was her issue and she had to deal with it, but it was just so brazen and in her face. The three of them had said they liked each other more than friends the night they had the huge fight. They knew she fucking liked them and it felt like a smack in the face after her attempt at giving them a wonderful day. Oh well. Their loss, someone else's gain.

A young Irish lad around her age was keeping her company at the bar. He was handsome but nothing to write home about, but he was really funny and she kept laughing. Every so often the twins would glance her way, seeing her happy and talking to some guy. They felt the jealousy but as they glanced to each other, they felt the guilt. They were practically having some kind of fucking orgy in the booth here and she must have seen them and they sat there jealous she was laughing with someone.

Rocco got bored since his girl was out for the count and he got up, staggering slightly as he was piss drunk.

"Lila!" He beamed as he approached the bar. Lilas' eyebrows shot up seeing how fucking wasted he was and she snorted loudly.

"Fucking hell Rocco, how much have you drank?" She asked incredulously, leaning over to hug him over the bar. He couldn't help the smile as he hugged her back, he felt a little smug he was lucky enough to hug the hot girl and he noticed he looks he got when he moved away.

"A lot! But hoooooly fuck sweetheart, you look...fuck." He laughed, eyeing her up and down. She threw the dish towel at him with a laugh.

"Thank you Roc." She smiled at him, making him remember that this was one of his best friends, sweet Lila.

"You should come sit with us when you're done." The words left his mouth without thinking about it because he'd asked her this a million times in the past. He grimaced when he realised and saw her glance over with disdain.

"Hmm...I think I'll take a hard pass on that one." She snorted and rolled her eyes.

"Fuck, I'm sorry Lila, I didn't mean to say that. They're idiots." He slurred a little, looking at her with his puppy dog eyes and she gave him a smile.

"It's fine, we're friends after all. But I need to find someone to go home with because I don't feel like being a voyeur when they take the bitches back with them. Aileen said I can leave whenever I want so I don't have to witness..._that_." She sighed, running a hand through her hair.

"You could always come home with me." He smirked playfully, she knew he didn't mean it the way it sounded to other people. He was teasing her but also letting her know she could crash on his couch.

"You sure Roc?" She asked with a small smile.

"You know you're always welcome at mine Lila, it's what friends are for. Lettin' their super hot friend sleep over on their couch to rub it in their other stupid asshole best friends faces the next day." He grinned making her laugh.

"Thanks Rocco, I think you're the only _decent_ friend I have." She mused, giving him a weak smile. He frowned a little, she wasn't wrong and that was fucked up considering he knew the twins cared about her a lot. He ordered a beer and squeezed her hand before he reluctantly went back to the whore house table of doom. When he sat down the twins looked to him with a glare, their eyes were red, betraying how much they had drunk as they looked completely out of it. The girls were still all over them but it seemed they had looked on and seen him talking to Lila.

"Seemed awfully cosy wit' Lila." Murphy stated accusingly his words slurring a little from the copious amounts of alcohol running through his veins, like he had any right to behave that way with this bitch on his lap grinding on him. Rocco glanced from one twin to another and scoffed incredulously.

"Whos Lila?" Murphys girl asked. They all ignored her though as the twins stared their hairy friend down.

"Are you fuckin' serious? I hugged the girl and I'm gettin' shit when you two fuck heads have the audacity to be practically fuckin' two girls right in front of her?" He asked, shaking his head, getting pissed at them. They were drunk but this shit was ridiculous, he was drunk too but he wasn't acting like an asshole to Lila. It was like these two fucks couldn't help but sabotage themselves. Things were finally going good with the three of them after last time and they somehow found another way to fuck it up once again, like subconsciously they didn't think they deserved it or some shit. Rocco squinted at them wondering how he suddenly became the wise one when he was so drunk. Nothing was making sense tonight.

Lila had poured some shots for the guys as a birthday gift, she did one for Rocco and she begrudgingly poured the skanks one each too just to be polite. She was their friend, she could do this. She got to the table just as she heard both girls ask.

"Who's Lila?" They'd asked again, since the raven-haired girl had gone unanswered when she had asked minutes before and they were getting jealous they were talking about some other girl.

"No one lass." Connor said as he cupped the blonde one's cheek.

"No one ye need te worry about love." Murphy purred, nipping the raven-haired girl's lips. Rocco was the first to see her and he winced and sucked a deep breath. She looked fucking devastated and he didn't blame her. He was struggling not to punch these assholes in the face. She slammed the tray of shots down, making them fall over and spill into the tray as all eyes in the booth turned to her. She had a stony face and the boys blanched realising she had heard them, as if their brains had finally switched back on and the desperate need for a quick fuck with someone they didn't care about was over. The look on her face was enough to make them sit up a little straighter and Murphy idly wondered if he might just throw up as he felt his stomach flip around on him.

"Who the fuck are you?" The raven-haired girl asked, eyeing her up with a scowl.

"No one you need to worry about apparently." She sneered coldly, glancing from one twin to another. They were clearly fucking wasted and they just looked at her with wide eyes and slack jaws, like their brains were too riddled with alcohol to even function.

"You spilled the shots everywhere bitch." The blonde stated dryly. The boys looked to the girl with raised eyebrows, not expecting her to be so hostile with Lila, yet being too dumbfounded to say anything about it.

"Real observant. Good taste guys, great catches you have here." She snorted bitterly before she turned on her heel and left back to the bar. The boys were frozen, their alcohol soaked brains trying to catch up with them as they realised Lila had heard them and once again they had upset her.

"Wow, well-done guys. I'm startin' to fuckin' wonder if you actually hate the girl since you break her heart so much." Rocco glared, pushing himself away from the table and walking over to the bar.

"Lila! You ready!" He called out. The twins watched with confusion as Lila came from the back of the bar with her jacket on and left with their best friend. They looked to each other mortified, the events sobering them up just a little.

"Really fucked it all up again haven't we?" Connor sighed, pushing the blonde away from him a little. Murphy mirrored him, moving the other girl from his lap.

"Seriously? You're upset over that bitch?" She asked Murphy with a glare.

"Don't fuckin' call her that." Murphy growled, his anger flaring at the fact that was the second time Lila had been called a bitch in the space of five minutes and she hadn't done anything wrong, they had. He wondered if he could hit a woman, the way Connor reached out to him telepathically said no. So instead he got up, his brother following suit and they left the bar. Not before noticing the dirty look Aileen shot the pair. Yeah, they had fucked up _again_.


	19. Chapter 19

**Intense feels, sadness and feelings revealed.**

It was noon the next day before Lila returned to the loft. The boys were sat at the table in just their jeans, they had not slept well knowing Lila wasn't there and she was mad at them. The silence in the loft was also like an awful taste of what it would be like if she was gone and it only made them feel worse. They were sure the poor girl was running out of chances she was willing to give them and they didn't have a fucking clue on how to fix it this time. The mistakes of the night before didn't have any deep meaning behind it. They were piss drunk, in need of a good fuck and the girls had presented themselves to them more than willing. But they knew they should have thought about Lila, it was hypocritical on their parts and they knew she fucking cared about them because she had told them, she had _shown_ them with the gifts she had gotten them. She had done nothing but try to give them the best birthday ever and they had thrown it back in her face. They were supposed to be building up their trust again, not pulling this shit. They knew damn well if it had been the other way around, and they saw Lila on some fuckers lap making out with him, well, said fucker would be dead in seconds. They couldn't imagine how she was feeling. And then there was the issue of the bullshit they had said to the girls, that the lass had heard. Of course they didn't mean it, their dicks were doing the thinking for them and they said it just to keep the girls interested and wanting. But they shouldn't have said it at all, because it wasn't true in the slightest. She had given them the best gifts they had ever received, she had forgiven them both for misgivings too big to forgive, she looked after them more than a friend should and she cared about them. And for them to say she was no one, for her to fucking hear that, they could only imagine how much it hurt her. Murphy remembered how he felt when she told him she wasn't his girl. That had been enough to make him feel like he was dying, and this was fucking worse.

She walked in, still in the same outfit as the night before and it looked like she hadn't even slept since her hair and makeup hadn't budged an inch. The twins stared at her warily but she didn't look to them once as she pulled her jacket off, throwing it over the couch. She walked over to the sink and poured herself a glass of water, chugging it.

"Lila love, can we talk about it?" Murphy asked hesitantly, feeling overwhelmingly anxious by the fact she hadn't spoken or looked at them yet. He was met with a stony silence as she kicked off her high heels.

"Lass, please talk te us." Connor pleaded desperately. They were finally met by her blue eyes and there was so much hurt there it was setting them ablaze.

"I'm sorry? Are you talking to me? You know, since I'm no one and all." She sneered, attitude dripping off every word like venom as she grabbed her jeans and a black t-shirt to change into. She started walking to the screen so she could change but Murphy had gotten up and was following her.

She turned around before the screen and looked at him looking bored, clothes in her hand as she waited for him to take the hint and go the fuck away so she could do so without an audience.

"Don't be like that Lila, we're sorry. We were drunk and stupid, I know its no excuse but we're sorry." Murphy begged, clearly not taking the hint. She glanced at her clothes and back to him pointedly to make it obvious but he didn't budge. Fine, alright then, if he wanted to play that game.

"You're right, it is no excuse." She started as she undid her jeans and pulled them off. The boys watched her carefully, aware they should look away but they didn't.

"I was prepared to give you guys the benefit of the doubt, we are just friends, after all, I'd even arranged to sleep on Rocco's couch so you could bring those bitches back here without me being in the way." She continued, unclipping her bralette and tossing it to the floor. She had no bra underneath but her hair was long enough to cover her nipples. The twins could see the swell of her breasts either side though and they both shifted in unison, feeling their bodies reacting. It was just awkward since they were currently having a fight.

"But then…" She laughed incredulously. "Then you pull that shit, '_she's no one you need to worry about.' 'she's no one.' _like wow really? You sure like _no one_ to cook and clean for you, to make you fucking lunches for work." She laughed bitterly, shaking her head.

Murphy knew he shouldn't, god knows he knew he shouldn't, but he couldn't control himself, even with her words or the venom in her voice. He was never one for self-control or to show any restraint and before Lila fucking knew what hit her, the darker haired twin had closed the gap between them, his lips on hers as his hands greedily grabbed her hips. There was no sweetness in his kiss, it was all tongues and teeth as all of his desperation and pent up feelings came out. Like seeing her in only her panties had been the straw to break the camel's back and he couldn't help himself. Lila kissed him back at first, too shocked for her brain to work and her hands rested on his chest as he backed her up to the wall and he moaned into the kiss. His body was pressed flush against hers in the best way as his mouth claimed hers almost violently. But then the words from the night before pinged around her brain like a ping pong ball and in an instant, she had pushed him away, and there was a resounding thwack that echoed in the loft as she smacked him hard across the face.

Murphy held his face with a wince and wide eyes, he knew he deserved it. She was already upset at him and he fucking attacked her with his lips like that when she was already vulnerable, practically naked and mad. Connor stood from his place where he had been sat, watching the whole thing part interested, part mortified, and he walked over warily. It was confusing, he was quite turned on by watching Lila kiss his brother like that, to see how she gave into him so easily, making it clear she wanted him, but at the same time he fucking knew this wasn't the time or place for that, not with everything that was going on. And the slap across Murphys face just proved that point.

"How fucking dare you!" She hissed at Murphy, seething with such rage. Murphy had the decency to look abashed by his lack of control, but if he was completely honest he didn't fucking regret the kiss because now he had actually kissed her.

"I'm done with your fucking mind games, the both of you are fucking ridiculous. You say you care but actions speak louder than words, and right now it's quite clear you don't give a fuck about me. I'm just some fucking plaything to you both." She spat angrily as she shoved her shirt over her head.

"No lass, yer not, please, last night was a mistake and Murphy's just a fuckin' idiot." Connor pleaded, shooting Murphy a dark look for being such a dick. Murphy wiped his hand over his face, finally meeting her eyes. He was unsettled to find that instead of the rage that was just there a second ago, now she just looked cold.

"I'm going to view apartments today. I'll be out of your hair soon enough and you can go do whatever the fuck you want without me around." She said harshly, tugging on her normal jeans and shoving past them.

It felt like their hearts had stilled completely as they whipped around to look at her as she grabbed her Doc Martens, sitting on the chair to put them on.

"No! Ye cannae leave Lila, fuckin' please!" Murphy cried, his eyes filling with tears as fear rushed through him. It was a harsh reminder from that fateful night he had hurt her but this time he didn't feel anger at her leaving, he just felt blind pain. Lila couldn't look at him, it would be hard to stay mad if she did. When Murphy was upset he always looked so young and vulnerable and she needed to see this through. She couldn't keep going through this with them.

"Lass please don't leave." Connors low voice shocked her so much her hands stilled. He sounded so broken, upset, a voice she wasn't used to hearing from the harder hearted twin. She swallowed thickly, stupidly braving a glance at the pair. Murphy wiped his eyes, his chest heaving as he looked at her pleadingly, and Connor looked at her defeated, his eyes shining with unshed tears. They knew they'd fucked up again, and they weren't sure why it kept happening. They'd become used to having the girl in their lives and they weren't ready to let her go, they couldn't just willingly let her leave because they both knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that without her, their lives would become very fucking empty.

Lila felt the coldness she had surrounded herself with to protect herself crack, her own tears falling down her cheeks as she clenched her jaw and took a deep breath. She needed to stay strong. Her jaw ached with how hard she was clenching it as she looked back down and continued putting her boots on. Connor shook his head as he lowered it, feeling like his heart was on fire and consuming him whole. Murphy choked out a sob as he rushed at her, falling to his knees in front of her and taking her face in his hands. He was crying freely now, always the twin who didn't care about showing his emotions, he couldn't hide them anyway. Lila's bottom lip trembled and she closed her eyes so she didn't have to look at his heartbroken blue eyes.

"Delila please, dinnae leave us, we need ye. Fuckin' please, I cannae live wit'out ye. " He begged through his sobs, so fucking desperate and hurting so bad. Her chest was heaving as she tried to stop herself from sobbing and breaking down completely. Hearing Murphy so upset only hurt Connor more, it felt like someone was stabbing him in the heart over and over.

"I can't...I can't keep doing this with you. It hurts too much." Lila sobbed, the dam breaking as her heart shattered inside of her. Murphy shook his head pleadingly, pulling her head down to rest her forehead on his.

"Please. Please, Lila dinnae go. We love ye, we're so fuckin' in love with ye and we need ye." Murphy admitted through his harsh sobs. Connor leant against the back of the couch, feeling like his heart would give out at any moment. The pain was unbearable.

"No you don't, if you did you wouldn't keep hurting me." She whispered brokenly through her tears. Murphy's words had felt like a punch to the gut, how could she believe them? Connor shook his head as a choked sob escaped him. He knew this was it. She was right, actions spoke louder than words. They could tell her they loved her until they were blue in the face but it didn't mean a thing unless they acted that way to back it up. And all they had done so far was hurt her, now they were going to lose her forever.

Murphy's hands fell from her face as he wrapped his arms around her middle like a desperate child, laying his face in her lap as his body shook with violent sobs. He couldn't lose her, he felt like he would literally die if he did.

"One more chance lass, please. I know it's askin' a lot o' ye, but please. Just one more so we can prove te ye we love ye." Connor pleaded weakly as he wiped his eyes. Lila lowered her head as she cried. This whole thing was hurting her more than she had thought it would and the boys' pain only made it worse, because she fucking loved them with every fiber of her being and seeing them like this was killing her. Murphy's strangled sobs echoed in the tiny loft and each one was like a stab to her heart. Her hands found his hair as she ran her fingers through it, wanting to take even a fraction of his pain away.

"One more chance, this is it. Any more fuck ups and we're done." She sighed feeling worn down and defeated. As much as she knew she should go, after everything and all the drama, they had her heart and leaving would hurt her just as much as it would hurt them.

Murphy's grip on her tightened as he cried tears of relief now, he wouldn't fuck up again, they both wouldn't. Too much was at stake and this whole thing had woken them the fuck up. Connor walked over, sniffling as he wiped his tears away. He crouched next to them, his hand weaving into Lilas long hair and his other rubbing Murphy's neck soothingly. The three of them were physically linked for the moment, staying silent as they all tried to calm themselves and take comfort from one another. Connor composed himself first, being the calmer of them all in general. He kissed the side of Murphy's head before leaning up and kissing Lilas cheek. He stood and went into the kitchen to make them all some tea. He felt exhausted after all that, it had taken it out of him. Lilas' hands were stroking through Murphy's hair softly and he looked up at her, wiping his eyes as he tried to calm his breathing. They just locked eyes for a moment, they all knew this was a turning point for them. They couldn't go back to being just friends, it was causing too much hurt for them all. It was finally time they just bit the bullet and dealt with whatever it was they were feeling. Lila leant forward, pressing a kiss to Murphy's forehead softly, her lips lingering there as he stroked her hips. When she moved away he gave her a weak smile which she returned.

It was moments like this where she was sure Connor was the oldest and Murphy was definitely the youngest. She thought back to what Murphy had told her about Connor the day before. '_He acts like feelin's just get in the way or somethin' if it's anyone but me.' _She had never seen it so clear, but now, she could. The twins came first to each other, that much was obvious, but it was as if Connor was forced to stuff his feelings down, not wanting to deal with them, in order for him to be there for Murphy and help him through. Murphy was over-emotional to the point sometimes he was a mess, and with their twin telepathy, she knew Connor must be feeling it too. She couldn't imagine what that was like, to have feelings that weren't your own. It was like Connor had trained himself to put his feelings in a box so he could deal with Murphy and get him through it, because he was worried. Hell, Murphy worried her sometimes with his behaviour. It wasn't just his anger, he got upset so easy and it was never just a little bit. Everything with Murphy was intense. Hard and fast. And she wondered to herself what would happen if Murphy didn't have Connor to continuously pick him up and carry him on his shoulders, and it made her heart clench. The whole thing was unhealthy. Connor didn't deal with his feelings which left him almost clueless to dealing with them, and occasionally they erupted like a volcano spilling over like the morning before it seemed. And then there was Murphy who did deal with his feelings, just not always in the best way. It was almost as if Murphy used his heart and not his head, with his twin being the opposite, thinking instead of feeling.

The three of them were exhausted now from everything, they were emotionally spent. Lila stroked Murphy's cheeks before she moved to get up, making him shift out of her way so she could stand. She wiped her eyes again, she was pretty sure she had no tears left now but that was a good thing. She hoped to God that giving the boys this last chance wasn't a mistake, but she knew she couldn't live without them now she knew what life was like with them in it. She slid off her jeans but kept her t-shirt on. Connor glanced over his shoulder at her as Murphy looked at her, watching her with interest as she climbed into Connors bed. She lay down on her side under the covers with a sigh. The twins looked to one another, once again not needing words. They were unsure if she had meant to get in the bed they had been sharing or if she was just that tired she needed to lay in the bed closest to her. They weren't really sure what the next move was. Since she had gotten into bed, Connor abandoned the cups of tea and walked over to Murphy as he stood up. Connor scratched the stubble on his chin and Murphy rubbed his lower lip with his thumb as they both looked at her. She was silent but they didn't think she was asleep yet, just fucking exhausted. They glanced to each other one more time and Murphy shrugged. He decided to throw caution to the wind and say a big 'fuck it', since everything would be different from now on anyway. There was no more pretending they didn't feel things for one another, no more dancing around the elephant in the room. This moment on was the changing point for the three of them and the only way it would work is if they just went with what felt right to them.

So Murphy shucked off his jeans, walking over to the bed and laying on Lilas right side, Connor following suit and laying behind her. Connors arms wrapped around her middle, his hand splayed on her stomach as he spooned her. She opened her eyes and Murphy was lay in front of her, his eyes were still red but he had stopped crying. She lay her hand over Connors on her belly like she had done to his twin the day before, and her other hand came up to Murphy's cheek, stroking it affectionately as she gave him a sleepy smile. She felt Connor tighten his arm in response, nuzzling the back of her neck, and Murphy gave her such a wonderful smile, leaning into her touch. Murphy scooted closer, feeling needy and still practically desperate after her almost leaving them. He was pressed against her as he tucked his head in the curve of her neck, his arm wrapping around her middle under Connors. She smiled to herself feeling content, like there was nowhere else she would rather be in the world than being sandwiched between these two, no matter how exhausting they could be at times. Her hand came to Murphy's hair and she buried her fingers in it, her soft fingertips massaging his scalp.

She heard him hum softly, almost purring at her affection as he nuzzled her neck, like he couldn't get close enough. Part of him wanted to climb inside of her shirt just so he could be even closer and feel her skin. Connor rumbled a quiet laugh behind her at Murphy's thought, his thumb stroking her stomach over her t-shirt. None of them spoke, they didn't need words. Enough had already been said and now they were happy to just be with each other and feel each other out, take comfort from each other. The three of them were once more linked as the boys' arms were touching, and the connection that the boys had noticed they had with the girl, felt stronger. Still not as strong as their own but they could somehow feel her, her energy, just like they could with each other. Lilas breathing hitched a little, telling the brothers that she too was feeling the intensity of their connection, and neither of them wanted to move, lest they disturb it. She had never felt anything like it before, but it was calming to her. It wasn't how she imagined it was for the brothers, she didn't know what they were thinking or anything, but it was like she could just _feel_ them. She made a mental note to ask Murphy about it all, wanting to know more about how their connection worked and knowing Connor wouldn't answer her as honestly, being the more guarded twin.

"He'll tell ye about ye later after ye wake sweetheart." Connor murmured into her hair. Lila tensed a little, eyes fluttering open as her hand stilled in Murphy's hair. She hadn't fucking said that out loud and it was slightly unsettling that he had known what she was thinking. She heard and felt Murphy snort against the skin on her neck, his hand tightening around her a little.

"Get outta her 'ead brother, don' think she's ready for tha' jus' yet." Murphy laughed lightly against her skin, sounding amused and sleepy all rolled into one, making his accent stronger. Connor made a noise of dissent in the back of his throat and placed a kiss to her shoulder, almost like an apology and Lila was still wondering how the fuck he had managed to read her damn mind. They weren't triplets. She could feel the boys, but she didn't know what was going on inside their heads, yet the boys seemed to have found a way to climb right into hers. She wondered if they needed a talk about boundaries. It was only early afternoon but they would all agree, they had deserved a fucking good nap, and that's exactly what they planned on doing.


	20. Chapter 20

**Murphy tries to explain the telepathy to Lila and he gives his opinion on where he thinks their girl fits into it all.**

Lilas consciousness came to her with a jolt as she heard a noise she couldn't quite place. Her eyes fluttered open slowly only to see Murphy sat looking at her sideways on the bed, his camera in hand. He snapped another shot of her, and her brain registered it was the noise she had heard. Murphy was pleased with the pictures. She looked so unguarded and beautiful in the mornings and now it was captured forever. He lowered the camera a little and noticed she was squinting at him.

"Did you just take pictures of me sleeping?" She asked sounding amused, her voice was a little louder than intended and Connor behind her snored louder, his hand around her waist dragging her closer to him. Murphy lowered his head with a nervous chuckle, and Lila noticed his cheeks flushed pink.

"Murphy MacManus, did you just blush?" She asked teasingly, keeping her voice softer this time so she did not wake Connor up. Murphy blushed even harder, glancing at her through his lashes as he nodded sheepishly.

"Ye just looked so beautiful, wanted te capture it." He replied softly. Lilas' heart felt like it might burst from his words and his adorable sweet face.

She tried to sit up, but Connors' arm was a dead weight and Murphy snorted, reaching over to help her get free of his grip. When she finally sat up, she gave him a smile, taking his hand in hers and kissing his knuckles softly.

"You can take pictures of me sleeping any time, just make sure if I'm asleep that I'm not drooling." She grinned at him, making him huff out a laugh at her. He reached out, tucking some of her wild red hair behind her ear as he just looked at her. She could feel the intensity behind his gaze and it reminded her of the night before and the strange connection they shared whilst being a tangle of limbs. As if knowing what was on her mind once again, Murphy stood, pulling her up with him.

"Guess I should try te explain some shit love. Ain't great wit' words but I'll try." He said looking nervous, chewing the thumb on his spare hand. She nodded as she let go, walking over to the couch and Murphy went into the kitchen to make them some coffee. When he returned with two wonderful smelling cups, he placed them on the small coffee table. The pair sat at either end of the couch facing each other, their backs against the armrests, and Lila had taken the crocheted blanket from the back and lay it over their tangled legs.

He looked anxious and she wondered why he seemed scared almost to tell her. He was picking at his nails as he glanced at her and then his hands.

"Dinnae rightly know where te start m'girl." He admitted, his cheeks flushing once again. Lila sat up straighter, taking his hands to stop him fidgeting. It seemed to calm him instantly.

"Why don't you start with you and Connor first, how that works. I mean I have an idea but I don't really know and you two never talk about it." She suggested softly. He took a deep breath and nodded, hoping the words would come out right. It was a big deal for him to talk about this to her because he and Connor hadn't ever told anyone before. Everyone just knew they were so in tune with each other because they were twins and it was obvious, but they didn't really know the extent of it.

"Alright so, the uh...the telepathy. Ye picked up on it, no fuckin' clue how, but ye did. So it works a few ways. We're kinda in each other's heads all the time, it's kinda like...like listenin' te a radio station? But we can kinda have it on low volume. It's always there, like background noise, but we're just used te it so it doesnae really bother us none." He started, hoping he was making sense. Lila gave him an encouraging smile and squeezed his hands and he felt good to continue, it seemed like she was following.

"We can make it stronger if we need te, either pushin' our thoughts on the other more, or like...tappin' inte each other more. At times, we can block each other out, but it takes a lot o' effort te do. We dinnae really need te though, so it's rare we do that...and it's like, thoughts, but also feelin's too. So we know what we're thinkin', but we can also just...it's like...we can just feel what the other is feelin' aye? It's like yer own emotions but not as strong. Connors always been good at bein' able to tell what's his and what's mine, but wit' me, I always found it harder. I think it's just 'cause I'm so…" He trailed off, not knowing the word.

"Emotional?" Lila supplied with a knowing grin, making Murphy snort lightly at her and squeeze her hands.

"Aye m'girl. I always have a lot goin' on inside o' me, and I think that's why Connor tries te just fuckin'...lock it all away. 'Cause he knows I have enough te deal wit' on me own wit'out his shit...and like...we can just look at each other, and we dinnae need te talk, 'cause we can just think and the other kinda hears it in their head I guess? Fuck, I feel like I'm not gettin' it right." He sighed frustratedly, lowering his head a little.

"Hey, I'm getting it, your doing good." She smiled at him, making him nod and look at her again. She really wanted to know and the whole thing fascinated her.

"Ti's stronger when we're tegether, especially if we're touchin' in some way. So if we're apart, we can still do it, but its a lot fuckin' harder and takes a shit tonne o' effort. It's why we dinnae really spend much time apart, 'cause it sets us on edge, not bein' able te feel each other properly… and when we touch, its kinda like...it grounds us? I dunno if that's the right word for it, but like, its calmin'. So when I'm upset, and Conn grabs the back o' me neck like he does, its kinda like, he can push his calmness onte me, te help me calm down. Doesnae always work, just 'cause sometimes I'm passed the point o' no return, but he tries. " He explained, toying with her fingers absentmindedly.

"So how do I fit into all this?" She asked curiously, making him take a deep breath, hoping that he didn't fuck this up or say too much. Connor was already reluctant to share the information with the girl, with anyone, but he knew after they all felt the connection last night they had to tell her.

"I uh...it's never happened before. Me and Connor havin' this kinda shit with someone else. It wouldnae make sense really, we're twins and that's why _we_ have that connection. We've…" He shifted uncomfortably and Lila noticed his ears turning pink.

"We've shared lasses before, just like casual things, sex and stuff...but we've never really had a serious relationship or had feelin's for someone before. In a way, it was kinda like… we had each other, and that's all we needed, so we didnae have a need for someone else. It was always just sexual wit' lasses. But then...then _you_ came along and things were just different. This is new te us too, last night, bein' able te feel ye, be in yer head. It was fuckin' weird. It doesnae feel like me and Connor, it's not as strong and I was able te tune ye out. I know ye wouldnae appreciate us in yer fuckin' noggin' like that, it's pretty invasive. T'is why I told Connor te get outta yer head. It wasn't like we meant te, it just kinda happened. It's kinda like...like the radio thing I said. Like we're all tuned inte the same station tegether, if that makes sense? Except wit' you, we can switch the radio off, but with each other, we can't. Came as a shock te us both really when we could hear ye like that. The only reason why I can think o' is just 'cause o' how much we care about ye. I don't want te sound like a fuckin' girl out o' chick flick or nothin', but I just...I can't help but feel like…" He was so nervous, so fucking nervous to get the words to come out. Lila had watched him intently the whole time, his words melting her heart over and over as she felt the warmth spread through her body.

"Feel like what Murph?" She asked carefully, looking at him with pleading eyes, not wanting him to shut her out, not now. He inhaled deeply, trying to steel his nerves, he knew Connor was going to beat him into next week when he knew just how much he had told her. Connor wanted her to know the bare minimum so they didn't scare her off. The whole thing was fucking intense.

"I feel like...like the three o' us, it's how it's meant te be. From the day we laid eyes on ye, there was somethin' there. And I cannae help but think that maybe, God put us tegether for a reason, maybe us three tegether was his plan all along. Why else would we have that same connection wit' ye that we have wit' each other? It isn't like we just love ye, the connections deeper than that. Ye know as I do how intense it felt, and even we were caught off guard. I just feel like maybe it means a lot more than just carin' for someone… I mean...we love our Ma more than anythin', and Rocco is like our brother, but we dinnae have that wit' either o' them, ye know? It's just like...me and Connor were fine on our own, we felt complete, we didnae know any better. But the second ye came along, we felt it. Feelin' completely whole...like...like ye were made for us, meant te be wit' us all along." He admitted shyly, looking at her like he was about to crawl out of his skin from anxiety from the weight of his words.

Lila was silent for a moment as her brain digested his words. She looked at their joined hands and even now it was as though she could feel the vibration of his energy, but on a low simmer in the background. It was how she imagined psychics felt or empaths or some other shit, being able to read energies like that. Murphy's words made sense. From the get-go she had always been able to read them well and seemed on the same wavelength as them both. She always knew when something was going on between them and she knew about the telepathy without being told. She felt for them more than she had felt for anyone before, more than she thought was even humanly possible to love someone. For him to say he thought she was made for them, it made her heart squeeze so hard she thought it might explode, the meaning behind his words, the sincerity. Murphy shifted anxiously, her silence was making him nervous and he felt like she might bolt out the door. He was pleasantly surprised when she looked at him with a bright smile.

"I know what you mean, I kinda think that too." She admitted softly, reaching out and stroking his hair affectionately. Murphy beamed at her, relief flooding through him that he had been able to explain something so complicated and intense to her properly and the fact she agreed.

"Ye do?" He asked, giving her his shy smile under his lashes. The look always made her stomach flip around on her.

She crawled over the small distance between them, in between his legs. His breathing hitched as she brought her face close to his, her hands settling on his bare shoulders, and he brushed his nose against hers softly.

"I do." She whispered with a small smile, her whole body tingling with being so close to him like this. One of his hands came to her neck and he could feel her rapid pulse under his fingers as he leant up and captured her lips with his own. It was different to the night before. When he kissed her then he was just overcome with primal desire for the girl. It was more intimate this time, although still demanding. His hand wound into her hair as they kissed deeply, and he fisted it, making her moan softly. The noise went straight to his cock and he took the opportunity to invade her mouth with his tongue. Murphy's kisses were hard and fiery she'd noticed. They were the kind that made your legs weak and left your panties soaked. He tugged her hair a little again, releasing another delicious moan from her lips. She felt like her body was alight with electricity, intense didn't even begin to cover it.

They parted, the two of them breathless and slightly overwhelmed by the intensity of the kiss and how it made them feel, Lila rested her forehead on Murphys.

"Startin' the party wit'out me?" Lila squeaked and whipped her head around, looking over the back of the couch to see Connor sat up in bed, looking amused and sleepy. Her cheeks flushed bright red as she looked at him like a deer caught in the headlights. Murphy had not reacted, he'd known the second his brother had woken up and he knew he was watching. He had heard his brother in his head telling him to make her moan again because it was the best noise he'd ever fucking heard. Lila looked back to Murphy and he smiled devilishly at her.

Lila wasn't sure what to do. She'd never been in a relationship or whatever the fuck this was, with two people before, and she knew from experience just how jealous the twins could be. She was worried they might fight. They could feel her anxiety, and Murphy's thumb stroked over her pulse as Connor stood, stretching as he sauntered over to them. Lila watched him intently, blinking at him as he leaned over the back of the couch. He took her face in both of his hands, not speaking but looking into her eyes. She was confused at first, but then she felt it. The only way to possibly describe such a foreign sensation was a nudge in her mind. Like someone had managed to bottle up calmness somehow, and it was being poured over her brain. It was the weirdest thing she had ever experienced before. Her breathing hitched and her eyes widened as she stared at Connor, watching a slow smirk spread across his handsome face, knowing she was feeling it.

She turned her head back to Murphy, seeing him watching her carefully with a small smile. He knew it was one thing for him to try and explain to her about how it worked, how Connor was able to calm him down, but it was another thing entirely for her to actually fucking feel it happening to her. Connors' hands were still on her face and Murphy's hand was still on her neck. The boys glanced to each other before back to her, and Murphy reached out, grasping Connors wrist with his free hand. Lilas heart rate increased even more from the second the three of them were linked together. The energy was strong, fucking intense and she glanced from one twin to the other in absolute awe. She had never experienced anything like it before.

"Think we might o' broke the lass." Connor chuckled as he stared at her. She hadn't spoken and she looked in shock. Murphy snorted at him as he too watched the girl take it all in.

Lila closed her eyes, taking a deep breath, she wondered if she could do what Connor had done and she focused on her feelings and pushing them outwards. The boys tensed in unison as they felt the overwhelming rush of awe and admiration wash over them stronger than before. Murphy's hand tightened on his brother's wrist as they looked to each other, the pair feeling the intensity of the moment. They'd never shared a connection like this with anyone other than themselves. And they knew now, with what Lila had just been able to do, with them, they couldn't ever let her go, she was meant to be with them both just like Murphy had told her. Lila opened her eyes again, mischief twinkling in her eyes at the fact she had succeeded as she glanced from one to another and they gave her grins in return. The moment was broken by Lilas stomach growling so loud she would be surprised if Rocco hadn't heard it from wherever he was. She snorted loudly as the boys laughed, and in an instant, the hands on her were gone, Murphy also letting go of his brother, and the connection was back to being barely there. She could still feel it but it was no longer overwhelming.

"Guess it's time for breakfast then." Murphy laughed, squeezing Lilas hips playful as she blushed. She had no idea where this thing with the guys was heading but it felt serious already, and when she really thought about it, she knew she didn't mind one bit.


	21. Chapter 21

**If anyone is wondering about my posting schedule, I post two chapters a day. Sometimes one in the morning (UK time), and then one in the evening, sometimes both in the evening.**

**This chapter almost didn't happen. The one after this was actually chapter 21, but then I realised that I didn't really go into Connors first kiss with Lila like I did with Murphys, since the chapter after this starts a week after Murphy kissing her. Connor wasn't impressed with me at all and kept nagging at me. **

**So here we are. It's kinda short but just as sweet and according to Connor; **_**very**_ _**fuckin'**_ _**important**_**!**

It was weird for Lila to be at work, knowing things with the boys were dramatically different. She thought back to that very morning, when Murphy had kissed her and left her breathless, how Connor had joined them and shown her, let her feel, their intense connection. It made her head spin and she didn't really understand how she was part of it. Murphy's explanation of her being made just for them did make sense, because she had no other clue what the hell it could be. As Murphy said, they were twins, that's why _they_ had that connection. But Lila wasn't part of that, she wasn't related at all. She had no idea how she would have such a profound and weird ass bond with the boys, but she liked it. It felt so intimate and it was strange. It would definitely take some getting used to.

She stood there drying some glasses, the boys were perched at the other side of the bar with Rocco, and Aileen was talking to them. The older woman was an angel, Lila loved her. She had been so mad at the boys and what they did on their birthday, and she tore strips off them when they walked in. Lila was amused. But Aileen could see they had worked it out, she could even just see the difference in the three. She wasn't going to intervene or cause trouble. She just wanted the boys to know that if they fucked with Lila again, they'd have her to deal with.

She'd been at work for over an hour now and there had been a niggling voice in the back of her head, making her painfully aware she hadn't kissed Connor yet. She wasn't sure how to go about it, he had the chance to kiss her when he grabbed her face at the loft that morning, doing his Jedi mind shit on her, but he hadn't taken that chance. She found herself feeling anxious, maybe he'd changed his mind? Maybe he decided he didn't want her that way after all. Or maybe he was waiting for her to go to him. She felt too unsure of herself to pull a move like that though. Connor was always harder to read than Murphy, sometimes she didn't know where she stood with him. She'd felt a little bit hesitant with him after the whole car incident, because that had thrown her for a loop and was so unexpected, to see him act like that. So instead, she opted to dry the glasses and glance over at the boys every now and again.

She had noticed the twins in a heated discussion in some other language, Murphy was scowling, looking like he was giving his brother an ear bashing, and Connor just looked sick of him. She worried a little, there was some tension there, and she hoped she wasn't the cause. She heaved a sigh and jumped when Aileen touched her arm, she didn't even notice the woman come over to her.

"Ye can take a break sweetie." She said softly, making Lila look at her like she'd grown an extra head. Lila never took a break. She only worked from 8 till 11 so she never felt the need to, so this was new and very fucking weird.

"Uh...no I'm good, thanks Aileen." Lila smiled, still looking a little baffled. Aileen chuckled giving her a weird knowing look and it only confused her more.

"There's a handsome blonde Irish man after yer company outside for a moment." She smirked, nodding her head in Connors direction. Lila quirked a brow curiously, Connor wouldn't look at her, fidgeting and fishing out his smokes.

Murphy caught her eyes though, tipping his beer to her with a lopsided grin, looking like he had won whatever argument he had with his counterpart. It made her blush and smile, remembering how intense their kiss was. His grin turned into a smirk like he could tell what she was thinking, he probably could since the assholes knew everything now.

"Alright I guess, I won't be long." She told Aileen, setting down the towel and glass as she made her way out from the bar. Connor was stood as he glanced to her unsure of himself and Lila felt even more worried. Was this where he broke up with her? Were they even together for him to break up with her? Her brain fucking hurt at this point as she followed him outside.

He lit his smoke and he shifted as he looked at her, exhaling and looking so uncomfortable.

"What is it? You've changed your mind, haven't you? I should have known." Lila sighed regretfully, leaning against the wall and crossing her arms over her chest. Connors eyebrows almost flew off his head and he let out a small laugh.

"Fuckin' Christ lass, oh ye o' little faith." He snorted incredulously. Lila looked at him and relaxed just a little.

"Well, what is it then?" She asked bluntly, the anxiety was making her skin crawl and he looked about the same. He inhaled his smoke once more as he stepped towards her, stopping just a little away from her. He scratched the scruff of his chin and Lila noticed he kept glancing at the door.

"I just… I ain't really good at this shit aye? And then there's Murph." He sighed, looking contemplative. His eyes were flitting to the door every two seconds and he was fidgeting. It was obvious he wanted to talk to her alone for some reason, but also Murphy had something to do with how he was behaving? It clicked in her mind then, Murphy's words from that morning ringing through her brain. '_It's why we dinnae really spend much time apart, 'cause it sets us on edge, not bein' able te feel each other properly…'_

"Is it really bothering you that much when he's just inside? You know he's okay." She said softly, her brow furrowed, she was honestly shocked. She didn't know Murphy meant it like this, being separated by a wooden door and only a few feet away. Connors' eyes widened for a moment, not really knowing what to say. He wasn't aware of just how much Murphy had told her about the whole thing, but it seemed his instructions of the bare minimum had gone unheeded.

"Fuckin' hell, how much did he tell ye?" He frowned, looking almost accusatory, his guard up. Lila snorted at him, shaking her head, she understood why he was reluctant. It was a big deal, they hadn't ever shared this with anyone before.

"He told me enough. I'm grateful he did, it all makes sense to me. I don't know why you don't want me to know, I'm part of it now after all." Her voice sounded so small to her own ears, like she was unsure of herself, her place with the boys. Connor untensed at her tone and flicked his smoke away, discarding it as he closed the gap. He didn't touch her though, he just stood right there.

"M'sorry sweetheart, ye know how I am. Just a little...guarded wit' it I guess. Had some...unsavoury comments made in the past and they didn't even know about the telepathy, just didn't like the closeness." He frowned, tugging his lower lip between his teeth.

"Well fuck them. Fuck them all. I love the bond you two have, it's so fucking special. And to be a part of that, it's overwhelming. It makes _me_ feel fucking special." She admitted, looking at him firmly. He couldn't help the grin that worked its way onto his face as he leaned down, kissing her forehead.

"Ye are special lass, very fuckin' special, te the both o' us." He smiled, making her beam a smile up at him.

"Well then, what is it you wanted me for Mr MacManus?" She asked, feeling much more relaxed now with him. He quirked a brow at the name and huffed a laugh. He shifted where he stood once again, looking over to the door. She took his face in her hands, making him look at her. Her bright blue eyes were soft as she looked at him, no judgement there, just adoration, and it made his chest constrict.

"Connor, he's _fine_. Why are we out here?" She asked softly.

He didn't answer her, instead he opted her show her what he had asked her out here for. He leant down, closing the gap, as his lips met hers. She was surprised at first, it caught her off guard, but then she melted into him and wrapped her arms around his neck. His hands pulled her close, one splayed on her hip and the other on her neck. His kiss was different from his brothers. Murphys was all fire and fury, hard and fast just like the boy himself. But Connors was intense in a different way. Each caress of his tongue seemed calculated and it was slow, but still very fucking sensual. She moaned into the kiss, and she felt him growl in response. The noise made her feel a little warm between her thighs and before she knew it, he had pulled away. He rested his forehead on hers, the pair breathing heavy and her cheeks flushed. She was glad he hadn't told her and just did it to show her, it made it less awkward.

"Hmm… I don't think I quite caught that, you wanna run it by me again?" She asked cheekily, her eyes alight with mischief. Connor snorted at her, a bright grin on his face at her teasing. He leant down and gave her another kiss, much shorter this time but still sweet. When he moved away, he took her hand, kissing it affectionately. She knew she had a stupid smile on her face like a girl that just got kissed by her high school crush but she couldn't bring herself to care. He stroked her face but she could see him tense again, looking to the door. She decided to put him out of his misery. She wasn't surprised that Connor had asked for her to accompany him outside, he was a more reserved and private it seemed, and it was only fair he got his turn with her.

"Come on, let's go see what that hooligan brother of yours is up to, I bet he's burnt the place down by now with him being away from you." She snorted, making Connor bark a laugh at her as they made their way inside.

Sure enough, when they walked inside, Murphy was pacing by the bar looking like he had received the worst news of his life. But when his eyes settled on his brother, he relaxed visibly and he smiled at them. It made Lilas heart flutter that they worried so much about each other, even when they weren't even far away. When his eyes settled on Lila, he gave her a real smile. Not a smirk or his teasing grin, but his beautiful full Murphy smile that lit up the room with its radiance. She loved the brothers real genuine smiles, they seemed reserved only for her and it made butterflies bloom in her stomach. She smiled right back as they walked over and she slipped back behind the bar. She watched the boys curiously as they both sat back down and she noticed how Murphy seemed to sit even closer to his brother like he needed him more, like the tiniest amount of time being barely separated had made him needy. She smiled to herself when she saw Connor squeeze the back of Murphy's neck and they smiled at each other. '_So when I'm upset, and Connor grabs the back o' me neck like he does, its kinda like, he can push his calmness onte me, te help me calm down'_. The twins looked over at her, beautiful smiles on their faces and she couldn't help but smile back as her cheeks flushed slightly. She had no idea why anyone would ever want them apart or make them feel shitty for their bond, it was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, and now she was part of it.

'_It's just like...me and Connor were fine on our own, we felt complete, we didnae know any better. But the second ye came along, we felt it. Feelin' completely whole...like...like ye were made for us, meant te be with us all along.'_


	22. Chapter 22

**Long chapter.**

**Lila's sick of feeling sexually frustrated and decides to take matters into her own hands, Murphys is all too willing to help her crack Connor.**

**Hot, heavy and fucking intense. Without further ado, the goods you've been waiting for. I'd apologize for making you wait so long, but I love a good slow burn and I'm a tease, so I'd be a liar!**

**Enjoy! :')**

A whole week had flown by before Lila had even realised it. Being in some sort of relationship with the twins was surprisingly easier than she thought it would be. They were their own separate people of course, but they fit together like jigsaw pieces and that made a whole entity of itself. She always had this low simmering anxiety about them thinking she was playing favourites when she wasn't, simply because she knew how they could get. Murphy was ridiculously needy and clingy, whenever the boys weren't at work, he was fucking attached to her hip, following her around like a lost puppy. It was endearing, well it was until she needed a piss a few days prior and she had to tell the poor boy off as he was stood literally just on the other side of the screen, talking animatedly about something or another. She couldn't pee with him right there and he had the decency to be embarrassed about not letting her piss in peace. Connor on the other hand, she had to seek him out. It wasn't that he wasn't affectionate or didn't care, but she had to go to him, not the other way around. He did this thing where when they would sit on the couch together, he would wrap his arm around her tightly, resting his hand over her heart. It made her feel stupidly safe, warm and fuzzy all at the same time. That and also a little turned on.

She never had one on one time with the twins for long. They took turns waking up with her, letting the other one sleep for a little longer to have some time with her. She knew they hated being separated, not being able to feel each other so clearly, and this way they were able to spend some time with their girl on their own, whilst they knew the other twin was close by and safe. Kissing them in front of the other took some getting used to, most times she expected them to throw punches just because she wasn't used to being...shared, or whatever the fuck this was. But they never did. At first they would kiss her on her own, the other twin off somewhere else in the apartment, doing whatever they wanted; reading, writing, cooking and such. It would get hot and heavy pretty quickly, making out like horny teenagers. But it never went further than that. One day found her cooking in the kitchen when Murphy kissed her, the next thing she knew, Connor was pressed up behind her kissing her neck. That was fun. It made her head spin and left her breathless, having that many hands and lips on her at once. But once again, it didn't go further. She was becoming increasingly frustrated about it with all their teasing kisses and touches. She knew they were taking it slow for her, because it was intense with the three of them. There was no middle ground. It was all consuming, swallowing you whole desire and feeling. It seemed like they wanted to ease her into it. She had a sneaking feeling Connor was the one pushing for them to take it slow. Murphy was all too eager and he'd even managed a sneaky grope or two up her shirt when they made out. It was always met by Connor muttering something in a language she didn't know, Murphy retorting, and escalating to them bickering about it.

She understood Connors hesitation, because he was the planner of the three, the thinker. He pushed his feelings aside to think things through and go with what he thought was the best course of action. But in this case, she didn't want thinking, she wanted doing. She wanted a fucking orgasm. Murphy was much more on her page with that one. He was always more intense when they kissed, touched her more, seemed more desperate. She knew without a doubt if she was left completely alone with him he would probably throw her on the bed and fuck her senseless. It was why Connor had not left them completely alone. She also had a feeling when he was 'asleep' in the mornings she was with Murphy, he was actually awake and just waiting for Murphy to fuck up.

Apart from that, everything was going smoothly. There had been no fights, the usual bickering but they wouldn't be the MacManus twins if they didn't bicker. She was thankful things seemed good, better than good even. She felt at home with these two, they made her feel cared about in their own ways and she wouldn't change them for the world.

They were at work and Lila had finished her routine cleaning of the apartment. She was sat at the dining table making a list of things to buy when her eyes landed on the mattresses. Murphy's had been abandoned. They all slept in Connors bed now, from the first night after they told her they were in love with her, she just stayed with them, the three of them found it hard to be apart. They hadn't told her they loved her since, and she hadn't ever said it to them. She did love them, but she also knew the only reason they said it at all was the pure desperation behind her leaving. It wasn't that she didn't believe them, because they had been showing her they loved her in their own ways. But she felt like they hadn't been ready to say it, they had been forced to by the circumstance and she felt like since this was all so new to them, and really fucking intense, they needed more time before those words appeared once again. She didn't even know what they were technically. Was she their girlfriend? Were they her boyfriends? They hadn't really talked about it or what it was officially and she was afraid to ask. She knew the boys had only had casual relationships, and whilst they hadn't spoken to another girl since the birthday incident, she worried a little that maybe it was serious more on her behalf than theirs.

She sighed a little as she glared at the mattresses and she suddenly got an idea. Sleeping on one mattress was no easy feat for three fucking people, and at least once a night she was woken up by a grumbling twin after they'd rolled off the edge. She jotted _bed_ down on her list and smiled. She knew the boys wouldn't like it, they never did when she spent money on them. But this was for her as much as for them, and it also made it seem more permanent. Getting them one big bed. She knew she'd need to sweeten the deal a little, butter them up, and that lead her to phase two of her plan. She smirked to herself, standing up and grabbing her jacket before heading out the door.

The deli was right by the furniture store and her eyes lit up as she saw her favourite caveman walking out with a bag full of food.

"Rocco!" She called out with a grin, making her way over. He looked around confused until his eyes landed on her, walking over to meet her with his usual lovable grin on his face. He wrapped her in a tight hug before moving away.

"Lila, what are you doin' here?" He asked with a smile, acting like he was so happy to see her even though they had seen each other the night before when she worked at the bar.

"Just running errands, looks like you're doing the same?" She asked with a snort as she gestured to the bag. He rolled his eyes with a grumble before giving her a grin. She knew he hated his job but he couldn't get out of it. If she was honest, she was scared for her friend. She knew too well the destruction the mob could bring and she feared for him. Hopefully he'd just stay an errand boy and they'd never feel the need to fucking get rid of him.

"Yeah, I can't stop long, gotta get back to the boss man. You workin' tonight?" He asked, already knowing the answer and she laughed a little at his ridiculous question.

"I work every night Roc." She smirked, poking his side a little and making him huff a laugh.

"Hey, you know what, you and me should grab breakfast sometime, I feel like we never get to hang out just us." She suggested with a beaming smile that he knew he'd never be able to say no to.

"You sure thing 1 and thing 2 will be alright with that?" He snorted, making her bark out a loud laugh.

"Yes, if not they can deal with it. I'm entitled to a life Rocco." She stated with a sassy eye roll. He nodded and scratched his beard. She was right after all.

"Yeah I know. Besides, I think I'm the only guy that can be around you without them wanting to tear limbs off." He gave her a goofy grin and she chuckled at him. He gave her another hug before he was off again and she made her way to the furniture store.

A few hours later and Lila was back at the loft looking adoringly at the new queen sized bed in the place of the two tatty mattresses. The delivery men from the store had graciously offered to help put it up for her and even take the old mattresses out to the dumpster. She had a feeling it was because they found her attractive since their eyes were glued to her boobs and ass, but hey, if you can't use the perks of being a woman to your advantage, then what's the point right? After the men left, she set about making the bed up nice. It had a mahogany headboard that matched the dining table, she was a sucker for matching furniture and since the loft was essentially one giant room, she didn't want the bed and table to clash. She put a deep purple sheet over the mattress, her favourite colour, and the pillowcases and quilt cover were black with a geometric gray design on them. It bit manly for her taste, but she knew she needed to sweeten the boys up so they didn't have an aneurysm when they saw the fucking thing as they walked in.

She smirked over to the bag on the table, something that would surely sweeten them and she knew without a doubt that Murphy would take the bait, hell Murphy would bite without the fucking bait, it was Connor really that she needed to crack. Lucky for her, she thought herself quite the seductress when she needed to be. She always got her own way. She felt excitement and nerves bloom in her stomach, excitement because she hoped to fuck she would be satisfied before it was time for work, and nervous because part of her really thought Connor wouldn't take the bait. Sometimes the man was too hard headed and controlled. She grabbed the bag, not needing to use the screen since she was alone. When she was done, she looked in the mirror. She couldn't remember the last time she wore something so sexy. She was wearing a black lace babydoll with matching lace french knickers. The babydoll was sheer and she could see her own nipples clearly, the French knickers were small and her ass cheeks were barely covered, she felt sexy and she smirked to herself. She slipped on one of the boys' robes, the smell told her it was Connors, and she tightened it so they wouldn't know what she was wearing underneath, for all they knew it would be Murphys t-shirt she slept in.

She started getting the lasagna ready, they wouldn't eat right away today, she had plans after all. She was setting it in the oven just as the door burst open, the twins laughing and shoving each other as usual. They stopped dead when they glared at the new addition to the apartment, the queen size bed was hard to miss and it was the fanciest thing they'd ever fucking seen.

"What the fucks this?!" Connor asked in his shrill tone, the one that meant he was instantly offended she had dared to spend money on them. She turned to face them, both twins looking at her. Murphy looked shocked, if he was honest he was a little choked up, always the sentimental one. The fact she had bought them all one bed meant she had no intentions of going anywhere. The gesture meant she was all in, there was no other mattress for her to slink off to if she wanted. There was no going back from this. Connor just squinted suspiciously at her, once again using his head and not his heart.

"Well sweetie, it's a _bed_, you sleep in it." She said patronisingly with a smirk, even Murphy had to snort at the sass coming from her mouth. Connor shot his brother a glare for encouraging her and Murphy bit his lip to stop more laughter coming out. Connor looked back at Lila, narrowing his eyes at her unimpressed.

"Ha ha, I gathered _that_ much. Why the fuck is it here?" He asked exasperatedly.

"Because I wanted a real bed. So I bought one. Or am I not allowed to buy myself things now?" She asked as she tilted her head defiantly. She had a point, Murphy could see that, Connor didn't like it but he heaved a sigh. He knew there was no point arguing with her and he didn't want a repeat incident of the car.

Lila looked at the both of them, a sly smirk spreading across her lips as she sauntered over to the bed, stopping in front of it and turning to face them.

"Besides, a real bed will be a lot comfier for...other things." She grinned mischievously, the robe sipping from her and pooling on the floor. The boys took a sharp intake of breath in unison, their eyes burning holes into her skin as they roamed her body. They'd never seen her like this before, they thought she looked sexy after she dolled herself up on their birthday, but this, this was something fucking else. They could see her breasts, the first proper time they'd ever laid eyes on them and she looked a fucking vision. Like a dark angel, all for them.

"Holy mother o' God." Murphy whispered to himself as he swallowed thickly, his Adam's apple bobbing at the motion, unable to tear his eyes off the lass. He could already feel his cock stirring in his jeans and he knew his brother was feeling the same.

"Lila…" Connor warned, taking a shaky breath as he tried to quell the surge of desire inside of him. She looked fucking delicious and he was having to urge to pounce on her, but they needed to take things slow, he needed to control himself.

"Fuck this." Murphy muttered, stalking over to the girl and pulling her close. He crashed his lips onto hers and it reminded her so much of their first kiss, so much passion and fire behind his desire.

She moaned into the kiss, winding her hands around his neck and tugging on the hair at the base of his skull. It tore his own moan from his lips that she happily swallowed. Suddenly the beautiful lips were torn from her as Connor grabbed Murphy and yanked him away. Lila and Murphy were panting heavily and both turned to glare at Connor.

"No! We need te take it fuckin' slow! The fuck are ye both doin'?!" He frowned, looking at them both like he was telling off naughty children. Murphy looked ready to punch his brother in his stupid fucking face, his cock was practically fucking throbbing by this point.

"Fuck taking it slow Connor! We're all consenting adults, why are you being this way?!" Lila yelled, getting agitated by his constant rejection.

"What she said!" Murphy added with a scowl. Connor didn't reply, instead he walked away, pacing a little with his back to them as he tugged his hair. It was obvious he was having some kind of internal struggle, no doubt his head vs his heart.

Lila licked her lower lip before glancing at Murphy, she wanted him in on the next thing she was about to do, because if he wasn't, things could go south pretty fucking quickly with the boys temper the way it was. She cupped his cheeks and closed her eyes, making Murphy look at her confused. She wasn't sure if this would even work, she hadn't done it since the day Murphy had told her about it and Connor had shown her, but she hoped it would. She didn't kiss him, didn't fucking talk and he wondered what the fuck she was doing, but then he heard it.

'_Don't be mad_'. She hadn't spoken the words verbally, but he heard them loud and clear, it shocked him a little at how clearly he had been able to hear it but he was unsure what the fuck it meant. Why would he be mad? He didn't have the chance to ask as she let go, turning back to Connor who was still facing away and pacing.

"You know what Connor, I've got needs. And if you two don't want me, I can find someone who does." She sneered, glaring at the back of the lighter haired twins head. Murphy's head whipped to her, rage filling his body, but then it clicked. '_Don't be mad.'_ It was a warning, she hadn't meant those words, she was warning him of what her plan was so he didn't get upset. She was baiting his brother, and he was more than happy to play along to push this to where he wanted it to go.

"The fuck does that mean?" Murphy yelled outraged, but she could see in his eyes no anger really there. The man was a good actor. Murphy had noticed how Connor stilled, he was breaking, he almost smirked to himself.

"It means I'm sick of the sexual frustration. It means I'm sick of being teased and never satisfied. I can find plenty of men who are willing to make me cum." She stated, smirking at Murphy as she saw his eyes darken just slightly. He knew she didn't mean it, but he knew that plenty of men out there would fucking love to make her cum, and it made him incredibly possessive all of a sudden. His right hand twitched a little as he tried to restrain himself and not blow the plan, her smirk made it obvious she knew she had pushed his buttons and he squinted at her a little, his own smirk spreading across his lips as she blew a sassy kiss his way.

Connor turned around, his eyes dark much like his twins and he stalked over to her slowly like a predator.

"No other man is touchin' _our_ lass. Ain't that right Murph?" Connor growled not even looking to his brother, his eyes locked on Lilas now wide eyes as he backed her up until she felt the bed hit the back of her legs. He was being a sexy bastard and she could feel her body reacting.

"Damn right brother." Murphy replied with a smirk, grabbing a kitchen chair and straddling it backwards. He leant his arms across the back and rubbed his lip as he watched the pair with rapt interest. The way his twin had cracked so easy, the bulge in his jeans giving him away as he stared the girl down. The way Lilas' chest was heaving a little, her skin flushed and her eyes wide. She was clearly aroused. Murphy thought back to the day at the diner when he called her a naughty lass using his low voice. She had responded this way then too. It seemed the little pretty thing liked to play submissive in bed, and Murphy couldn't wait to explore that with her.

Lila was frozen in place, all bravado gone as her desire for the pair came into full bloom. Connor ran his nose along her neck to her ear, making her shiver. His hand slid down her stomach at a painfully slow rate as he made his descent to her panties.

"Ye want this sweetheart?" He purred in her ear, his fingers slipping into her underwear and slowly teasing her slit. Her breathing hitched and she nodded, unable to trust her voice right then. He groaned in her ear feeling how soaked she was for them and he rubbed teasing slow circles around her clit. It tore a delicious moan from her full lips and she gripped his biceps so she didn't fall into a heap on the floor. Murphy bit his lip, a rumble of a growl in his chest as he stood up, removing his shirt and kicking off his pants as he went.

"Enough o' this, I've waited long enough." He griped as he went over. Connor turned to look at his brother, Lila leaning her head on Connor's chest as she moaned and arched against his hand. The twins locked eyes for a moment, sharing a look. Murphy knew Connor could be intense in bed, he'd shared a few lasses with him, hell he'd even been trying to sleep a few times after Connor had brought a lass home. But this was a whole other ballgame. The darkness in his twin's eyes. He had fully let go, something he never did, and something inside Murphy told him this was why his brother was hesitant in the first place. Because he knew this with Lila was different and he wouldn't be able to hold back once he crossed that line.

Lila whined pitifully when Connors' fingers left her and he chuckled a little, raising his fingers to her mouth. The look in his eyes made her knees weak and she complied, opening her mouth and sucking his fingers clean. Murphy couldn't wait any longer watching that sexy scene and he shoved her back on the bed, making her squeal a little, she didn't expect it. She was more than willing to be manhandled as he flipped her onto her stomach and moved her further on the bed silently. The whole energy was intense, the air thick with desire. He placed her so her head was at the end of the bed facing his brother and she was on all fours. Connor already knew what the drill was, this wasn't their first rodeo so to speak. Lila didn't though, she had never done this before so she let them lead her and excitement sang through her veins.

Murphy ripped her panties off her, literally ripped them with an audible tear and she almost said something. _Almost_. Connor shucking off his jeans and top in front her distracted her, his eyes were locked on hers as he shed his boxers too and her breathing hitched at seeing him naked for the first time. He was fucking exquisite. She couldn't see Murphy but she could feel him moving around on the bed and she looked up through her lashes at Connor as he stepped closer to her, stroking himself leisurely. She suddenly felt arms lock around her thighs and she moaned loudly when she felt Murphy's tongue give her a teasing lick. Connor used the advantage of her open mouth to slide his cock in, her eyes widened in shock for a moment before she relaxed. Connor ran a hand through her hair as he started thrusting into her mouth carefully, and she moaned around his cock as Murphy started licking circles around her clit. She couldn't help herself as she ground her hips to him wantonly. She felt him groan against her, the vibrations only heightening the pleasure as she continued to take Connor in as far as she could. He was big and he was honestly impressed when his cock hit the back of her throat and spasmed around him.

The pair set a punishing rhythm on her, Connors' hand wound in her hair as he thrust a little faster. His moans mingled with Lilas filling the loft and Murphy's cock was aching at the sounds. Murphy let go of one of her thighs, the other tightening around it as he added his fingers to the mix, sliding two inside of her soaked entrance. She gasped around Connors cock and bucked her hips a little. Murphy could feel she was close, feeling her walls flutter around his fingers as he continued to suck and lick her clit. He gave his brother a mental nudge that she was close and Connor thrust even faster into her mouth, feeling his own release coming up. Murphy and Connor had a system of sorts when it came to sharing lasses, to make sure they would both be satisfied. And they both knew in this case, they would both get their own turns with her with everything. Sex, blow jobs, hand jobs. There was no need to feel sour if they both didn't get to fuck her this time because it would happen anyway eventually. They had talked at length about how they would approach this with Lila, even before they had got together with her. They were boys after all and she was fucking gorgeous. So it was already planned out that Connor would cum in her mouth and Murphy would get to fuck her afterwards. Connor had a thing about watching, he didn't mind watching the pair after he was satisfied. Plus Murphy was needier, and he had no issues with giving his brother what he wanted. He couldn't deal with the bitching if he didn't.

Lilas muffled moans were getting more desperate and her body was writhing, she could feel the pleasure welling up inside of her and she suddenly cried out around Connor as her body tensed up. She couldn't remember it ever being this intense before, it felt like it lasted forever and she saw fucking stars. Connor growled loudly, the grip on her hair tightening as he bucked harshly, spilling himself inside of her mouth. Her moans and her face as she came had pushed him over the edge. He removed his cock and was more than pleased when the lass swallowed every drop of his cum. He and Lila were both panting heavily and she gasped when Murphy placed a soft kiss on her clit before moving out from under her. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, watching as Connor helped Lila out of the babydoll she was wearing and help her lay down on the pillows properly before she collapsed and he lay next to her on his side of the bed. She looked like she'd been to heaven and back and Murphy couldn't help the smug smirk on his face that he had given her that look. The boys took a moment to admire her completely naked body, it rendered them speechless, she was so fucking perfect with her alabaster skin, her blush pink nipples, her tiny waist, and her sexy curves.

"_Elle a un goût divin _(She tastes divine)." Murphy muttered, locking eyes with his twin and he took off his boxers. Connor quirked a brow, his own sly smirk spreading on his lips as he reached between Lilas' thighs and ran his fingers along her, making her gasp, before bringing them to his mouth and sucking them clean.

Lila was dazed and she blinked from one to the other, how could they be so fucking sexy? She felt like she was about to spontaneously combust.

"_Hmm, comme le miel _(Hmm, like honey)." Connor replied with a wicked smirk, making Murphy chuckle.

"Mmm I think I'm starting to like French." Lila laughed with a lazy grin and the boys smirked at her. Murphy crawled over to her and she bit her lip, looking at him all coy like. He hovered over her, ghosting her lips with his own but not giving her the kiss she wanted as she tried to chase his lips.

"_Ma belle fille, tout ce que je vais te faire _(My beautiful girl, the things I'm going to do to you)." He purred against her lips with a smirk, grinding his cock against her thoroughly soaked entrance. A noise somewhere between a moan and a whine left her lips and Connor grinned, propping himself up with his elbow so he could look at her pretty flushed face.

"Think she likes it when ye talk te her Murph." Connor smirked, biting his lip as she moaned again.

"_Je pense aussi mon frère. Pensez-vous que je peux la faire mendier? _(I think so too brother. Do you think I can make her beg)?" Murphy asked, still looking at the girl beneath him despite talking to his brother. Connor grinned darkly, the twins locking eyes for a second. Murphy rubbed the tip of his cock against her teasingly, showing uncharacteristic restraint. Lila was cursing him for finding some self-control in this moment of all moments. He just loved to tease though and Lila was playing into his hands like putty.

"Please Murph, please." She whispered desperately as she arched up at him, not caring how fucking needy and wanton she looked, the boys were loving it anyway. They shared a quick look thoroughly pleased with themselves at how quickly she had begged. Murphy groaned a little, hearing her beg and say his name like that, he almost came right there. The last of his resolve vanished, just like Lila had hoped, and he thrust inside of her until he was fully sheathed. The pair moaned loudly and Lila dug her nails into the back of his shoulders. It had been a while and he was pretty well endowed much like his twin.

"Fuckin' Christ, she's so tight." Murphy moaned, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to let her adjust before he pounded her into the mattress. He rested his forehead on hers, their heavy breathing mingling together.

Lila arched up at him with a mewl, wanting more from him and that was all he needed. He started rutting into her like a wild animal, groans and growls leaving his lips as he put the bed to the test. She was moaning loudly now, pushing back with each thrust and loving how he filled every inch of her, hitting that sweet spot every time. He leant on his forearm for leverage as his other hand gripped her thigh and hitched her leg over his hip to get ever deeper, making her gasp. Connor reached out, watching reverently as he pinched at her nipple, making her arch her back more. He was enjoying watching how her face contorted in pleasure, how she muttered his brothers name like a desperate prayer. She was a vision to behold in the throes of pleasure.

Her moans were getting high and more frequent and Murphy could feel her starting to clamp down on his cock, he was honestly surprised he managed to last this long. He was animalistic as he fucked her hard, growling every time he heard his name leave her beautiful lips. He angled her a little better, his pubic bone rubbing her clit with each thrust and that was all she needed, her back arched up so much she felt like she was being fucking abducted by aliens, and she cried out, squeezing his cock and milking him dry as he came inside of her with a loud moan. Connor reached out and stroked her hair soothingly as she came down from her high and Murphy practically collapsed on top of her, tucking his sweaty face in the crook of her neck as he tried to catch his breath. Her hand went onto his hair, massaging his scalp affectionately and she reached her other hand out to do the same to his twin.

Once again they were linked together and they felt calm and sated. They had taken the leap but it was fucking worth it, Connor regretted ever wanting to take it slow. Murphy pulled out of her carefully and collapsed next to her breathlessly. He'd had a lot of sex in his years, a lot of good sex. But that was fucking..._incredible_. He was sure he'd never came so hard before. For the first time in a number of years, he was fully relaxed. Lila glanced at the clock, she had work in a couple of hours. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep, but she didn't have the heart to tell the boys as they both curled around her, arms wrapping around her middle as they dozed off feeling content.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter ingredients;**

**Large helping of fluff**

**Dash of teasing**

**Smidge of jealousy**

**Heaps of feels.**

Lila hadn't slept, she just enjoyed laying with her boys, basking in the afterglow of some amazing fucking sex. She knew things would be different now, they dived headfirst into whatever the fuck this was with the three of them. She really wanted to talk about the officialness of their relationship, she thought they were official, it felt like it. They did love her after all. But she needed confirmation from them that this wasn't just a casual thing like with the others. She glanced at the clock again and got out of bed, successfully detangling herself from the boys. She padded into the kitchen, still naked, pouring herself a glass of water and drinking it slowly. She jumped when she felt arms wind around her waist and the hand splayed on her stomach told her it was Connor. _Veritas._ She turned in his arms, smiling up at his sleepy face as his hands stroked her back soothingly.

"Any regrets _Mo Cuishle _(My pulse)?" Lila asked softly, looking at him warily like he was about to say yes.

His heart seized up in his chest at the term of endearment. There was something oddly special about her speaking Gaelic to him like that, he'd only ever spoke Irish with Murphy. Just one more thing that seemed right with her that he only did with his brother. He always felt like Irish words carried more weight to them than English. It's why he and Murphy often referred to each other as deartháir, Irish for brother, when they were caring for one another or in intense situations. It just felt more appropriate than the English equivalent. He swallowed thickly, feeling his chest swell as he looked down at her and he gave her a warm smile, making her relax in his arms.

"Only regret is not doin' it sooner _A Ghrá mo Chroí_ (My hearts beloved)." He whispered, brushing his lips against hers in a soft sweet kiss. She felt her cheeks flush bright at his words, her heart fluttering wildly inside of her chest. She was glad he had no real regrets. She knew Murphy wouldn't have, Connor was the one she was worried about in this situation since he had been the one putting it off. But everything was fine, there was no awkwardness or worry. It just felt right.

Connor looked at the time as his fingers stroked her back softly, making the skin tingle.

"Ye should eat before work lass, ye'll regret it if ye don't." He chided softly, knowing they had not eaten and had worn each other out. She smiled up at him. He always took care of her just like he did with Murphy, always the protector.

"Okay." She said softly, leaning up to kiss his lips one last time before she moved away. She went to go to the oven to sort the food out but he stopped her.

"I'll sort it sweetheart, ye wake sleepin' beauty up aye?" He grinned at her, making her huff a laugh.

"Mhm, and how should I wake him? Pleasant or no?" She asked looking at him mischievously. Connor smirked at her, loving how she loved to tease them both as much as they loved to tease each other.

"Well since he fucked ye first, I'd say no." He laughed, a wicked glint in his eye. She smirked as she sauntered over to the bed, Connor watched her graceful movements, admiring her naked body as she went.

She glanced back to him, a cheeky look on her face.

"Cover your ears." She grinned, making him tilt his head, half confused but also amused. He listened to her anyway, plugging his fingers in his ears as he watched her, waiting to see what she was about to do. She stood at the foot of the bed, she knew Murphy would fucking hate her for this. The lass had a set of lungs on her, Connor would give her that. Even with his ears covered he heard her belt a blood-curdling scream that sounded like she was in the process of being murdered. Murphy jolted awake, panic all over his face and he fell out of the bed tangled in the sheet. He scrambled to his feet, his head whipping around wildly as he tried to get his bearings and worried something was happening to their girl. But when his eyes landed on her, stood there perfectly fine and covering her mouth so she wouldn't laugh, he squinted at her. Connor couldn't contain it anymore and burst out laughing, a full-on belly laugh as he watched his naked brother look like he was on the verge of a heart attack.

"The fuck was that?!" Murphy screeched, his arms flailing about as he tried to catch his breath. Lila looked contrite but the smile she was trying to hide came to view. He was too cute like this.

"Connor told me to wake you, not so nicely." She snorted, covering her mouth again when Murphy glared at her. He turned his glare onto his smug brother.

"Oh did he now?" Murphy deadpanned, eyes burning holes into his brother wishing he would set alight.

"Well, ye did fuck the lass first and all." Connor shrugged, still smirking. Murphy pursed his lips, sauntering over to Lila and slinging an arm around her shoulder.

"Aye I did fuck her first, and now ye get me _sloppy_ _seconds_ brother." Murphy smirked. It turned to a full-on cackle at Connors' face as he squinted at him. Lilas' mouth was agape as she looked up at Murphy, not liking being referred to as sloppy fucking seconds. She reached out and twisted his nipple with a scowl, making him yelp loudly. She moved away and crossed her arms over her chest squinting at him.

"Just for that comment, you aren't getting any for a week." She huffed, making Connor laugh loudly behind her.

Murphy's face looked panicked for a minute as he looked from her to his brother almost pleadingly like he was asking for backup. Connor walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her middle, resting his chin on her shoulder as he looked at his brother all too smugly for Murphy's liking.

"Ye know lass, I think that's a brilliant fuckin' plan." He grinned mischievously at Murphy. Lila smirked, raising a brow at Murphy.

"Like fuck it is! T'was a joke and ye know it, that's not fair!" He whined petulantly like a child having his favorite toy taken away from him. Connor laughed and Lila bit her lip to stop her laughter coming out as she looked at a scowling Murphy.

"Ye know what…" Connor started, unwinding his hands from Lila and moving away. He sauntered over to near Murphy.

"I have an even better idea." Connor grinned wickedly, looking to Lila, she quirked her brow curiously, wanting to hear what it was as Murphy huffed.

"I think, as well as not gettin' any for a week, he should have te see us at it like rabbits. Let him see what he's missin' and all that." Connor smirked, all to pleased with himself. Lila snorted, watching as Murphy's hands balled into fists as he glared at his brother.

"Oh fuck you! She wouldn't be able te resist me and ye know it. All I'd have te do is call her a naughty lass again and she'd get fuckin' soaked, ain't that right m'girl?" Murphy smirked, quirking his brow at Connor making him bark a laugh.

Lila snorted so loud she ended up slapping her hand over her mouth, her cheeks flaming red as the twins looked at her. It wasn't that what he had said was so bold that made her blush, it was the fact it was true. It was also the fact that she had thought none of them noticed how her body reacted that way in the diner to Murphy's words, but the sly smirk on their faces said otherwise.

"I'm not having this fucking conversation with you two, oh my god!" She laughed, feeling like her whole body was blushing. The twins grinned wickedly at her and she shook her head, grabbing her panties and shirt to cover at least some of her modesty after feeling so exposed, like Murphy was fucking calling her out for being a horny little thing. The twins were watching her, their eyes dark and predatory and she wished she didn't have work so they could go for round two, giving Connor his turn.

"Didn't you promise food?" Lila asked, looking at Connor pointedly. The lighter hair twin huffed a laugh and nodded.

"Aye sweetheart I did." He smiled, pushing his urge to fuck her like an animal down. He walked over, plating up the now warmed up lasagna.

Murphy walked over to her, the boys didn't seem to have any issues with just walking around butt ass naked and she bit her lip as she watched him get closer. He cupped her cheeks with both hands, rubbing the tip of his nose against hers sweetly.

"Ye know I didn't mean it, aye m'girl?" He whispered softly, as if he was worried she had really taken offense to it. Murphy could be so sweet and endearing at times. She resisted the urge to pinch his cheeks, she knew he wouldn't like it if she did, hurting his manliness as it were.

"I know _Mo Ghrá _(My love)." She smiled as her hands smoothed up his chest. He stilled, his hands on her face tightening ever so slightly at her words. Just like Connor, the weight of Irish words meant more and it made his heart beat faster hearing the term of endearment falling from her sweet as sin mouth. It just reinforced how things had changed between the three of them, it was serious. His face lit up with a beautiful smile, leaning down to kiss her lips tenderly, a stark contrast to his usual desperate kisses. Despite the difference, it was still firm and she still felt the emotion behind it all the same. One of his hands wound into her hair, she noticed he did that a lot, he had a thing for her hair it seemed.

"_Mo chéadsearc_ (My one and only)." He whispered softly against her lips, making her heart flutter. His words just ignited a fire inside of her once more, full of emotion and desire. She kissed him again, more firmly this time, and he moaned into the kiss, tightening his grip on her hair as his tongue tangled with hers.

She was pulled away and felt the loss instantly, only to be spun around to meet Connors blue eyes, they looked darker as he looked down at her.

"Food." He said sternly, a tug of a smile on his lips, amused at how flushed her cheeks were. Murphy grumbled as he moved past the pair, plonking down on a chair and starting to eat his food. Lila pouted a little at Connor making him rumble a laugh. He pulled her close to him, ghosting her lips with his teasingly and she almost whined.

"Can't I just eat you...again?" She asked batting her lashes all innocent like, despite the sly smirk she was sporting. He groaned, closing his eyes, remembering vividly how it felt having her beautiful mouth wrapped around his cock. This girl would be the death of him.

"After work maybe." He chuckled, leaning in to kiss her deeply. She wrapped her arms around his neck and his hands settled on her hips, loving how she tasted. She massaged her tongue with his, making him moan softly into her mouth. He pulled away regretfully and bit his lower lip, trying to calm himself. She gave him a cheeky smirk, pecking his lips once more before moving to sit down. Connor raised his eyes heavenwards, shaking his head with a smile before he followed suit.

Before long, the three of them were fed, dressed and walking through the doors of McGinty's for Lilas shift. They all got the usual cheers and pats to the back as they entered, even Lila got some since she had become a well-loved fixture in the Irish pub. One man even announced she was the prettiest barmaid in the whole of Boston and how they were lucky to call her theirs in McGintys, earning a chorus of cheers as people took a drink. It made her blush like a tomato whilst the twins chests puffed up with pride, stupid grins on their faces. Connor took a seat at the bar, but before Murphy went to sit down, he grabbed Lilas wrist, yanking her to his chest. She didn't have time to protest before his hand wound into her hair and he kissed her hard. They'd never done this before, usually, they'd kiss her cheek or forehead whilst at the bar before she went off to work, but it seemed the declarations of adoration for Lila by the patrons worked Murphy up enough to want them all to know who the pretty barmaid belonged to. She practically melted into him, a tiny moan leaving her lips as she kissed him back and she felt him smirk into the kiss as the bar erupted in cheers and whistles. When he pulled away, he gave her a devilish grin and she blushed once again, blinking up at him like she was dazed. He kissed her forehead before sitting down.

She glanced to Connor and he smirked as he was sat facing her on his bar stool, holding his hand out to her. She came to him, as always it seemed. Murphy had no qualms with looking needy and going to her at every chance he got, but Connor preferred to be in control, making the girl come to him. She walked over, taking his hand and he pulled her close between his legs. He leaned forward, tucking some hair behind her ear as he leant in, a hand on her neck. His kiss wasn't as hard or demanding as Murphys, not as over the top public claiming. But it was still intense and she found herself lightheaded as he kissed her slowly but sensually. The patrons of the bar cheered once again, hooting and whistling at them and her cheeks burnt bright. She was fisting his shirt and when she pulled away, her eyes were glazed over, making him give her a lopsided grin.

She bit her lip, smiling almost shyly at him, but then….then some drunk asshole had to open his mouth and ruin the moment they were having, of course, it had to be ruined.

"How much for my turn?" The man slurred with a booming laugh. Everyone else in McGinty's audibly sucked in a breath, the place seemingly silent for the first time ever, knowing those words were not the right thing to say. The guy must be new around here or something. Connors' hand was still on her neck and she felt him tense up, as all eyes fell on the man. Lila glanced back to Connor, his jaw set and his eyes stony as he looked at the man, almost incredulously that the fucker had the cheek to even make a comment like that, insinuating their girl was some sort of fucking whore. With his hand on her, she could feel his anger, simmering away at a low heat and she knew it was only low because he was holding back, as usual, fighting with himself to stay calm.

Then her eyes glanced over to the dark twin, who was now stood to her right, his fists clenched, jaw set and his eyes ablaze. His chest was heaving a little as he took a slow step towards the man and Lilas' eyes widened. Everyone in the bar was watching carefully, fully expecting to watch a murder tonight and none of them seeming to mind since the fucker was so rude to their barmaid.

"The fuck did ye just say?" Murphy's voice was eerily calm and low and Lila knew it wasn't a good thing because that voice meant he was that incensed that shit was about to go down. She moved away, going over to him and taking his hand, but he didn't look at her, glaring at the drunk man as he muttered something unintelligible, taking another drink. Almost as if he was unaware of his impending ass kicking. Lila could see the guy was piss drunk and although his comment was rude, there was no need for a fight, she doubted he knew what he was saying.

She tugged on Murphy's hand to get his attention but he was still glaring at the man, so she moved in front of him, gripping either side of his face tightly and pulling it down to look at her. His eyes finally met hers and she saw the storms raging in there, but they softened just slightly as he looked at her. She took a breath and closed her eyes. She knew Connor and Murphy did this whole thing second nature, but they'd had their wholes lives to practice. She had to concentrate and really focus on what she was doing. But Murphy felt it, the rush of calm washing over him like a trickle of cool soothing water. It was nowhere near as strong as when Connor did it, the boy had years of practice of calming his twin successfully. But the gesture alone made Murphy's heart melt like a popsicle left out in the sun, that she was using their new bond to try and calm him like his twin usually did. If felt intimate, more so than her just vocalising it. She was in his head, she was pushing her own feelings onto him and the whole thing was intense. He found himself wishing they were alone because the surge of emotions inside of him made him want her again.

She opened her eyes, giving him a small smile when she saw the anger from him fade away, and he couldn't help but return it. This girl was something else, and he wasn't lying when he told her he was sure she was made just for them. Only his twin had been able to do this with him, he'd never have thought in their wildest dreams, that a lass would come into their lives and somehow worm her way into their weird twin bond, it didn't make sense, not unless she was indeed made just for them. He rested his forehead on hers, his heart clenching with the rush of feelings for the redhead in front of him. It was overwhelming, and he so badly wanted to tell her he loved her, being the one never to shy from his feelings. Yet he did, it just didn't feel like the right time, not in front of all these people. He and Connor hadn't really spoken about using the L word, not since after Murphy had basically blurted it out in a desperate plea to stop her leaving. But they both knew they wanted to wait just a bit, for the three of them to ease into the whole thing. They hadn't been in an actual relationship together for long, after all, it just felt longer because of their intense friendship and the fact they fell in love with her way before they got together.

Lila also hadn't told them she loved them, but she acted like she did with the way she was with them, not to mention the terms of endearment she'd used earlier. It set him on edge a little that she hadn't said it out loud, it made him feel like he and his brother were a little more vulnerable since they had said it, even if it was just once. So for once in his life, Murphy didn't actually listen to his heart and just blurt the words out once again, in a pub, no matter how much he wanted to, because he actually felt unsure of himself. He knew he'd cave at some point, way before his lighter haired counterpart. He imagined Connor would take longer to tell the girl, since he was so controlled and closed off, even more unsure of himself than Murphy because Connor wasn't used to this. He wasn't used to not being able to get a lid on his feelings and Murphy knew it made him anxious.

His heart ached for the girl stood in front of him, her eyes closed as she fisted his shirt, their heads resting on the others. She was fucking perfect and he had no idea what he and his brother had done for God to grace them with such an angel, it made him feel choked up and he had to reign it in because people were starting to stare at them, even Connor was watching carefully. But Murphy knew his twin was aware of the war inside of him to stop the words falling from his lips, because he was reaching out to his brother pleadingly, mentally for support, and Connor, being the wonderful brother he was, was nudging right back to give his brother strength. Like a hug without either of them touching. It helped, but he still couldn't contain himself, like a boiling pot about to boil over, the words bubbling beneath the surface. He knew he had to say something, fucking something to ease this painful ache in his chest. Lila was looking at him now confused and careful, his forehead was still resting on hers and he had been silent the whole time, she could feel how tense he was but she couldn't reach out and feel him which worried her. She remembered how Murphy had told her the twins could block each other out if they needed to and it seemed that Murphy had locked Lila out of his head for some reason and it made her worry.

"_Je t'aime mon ange, remercie la grâce de Dieu de t'avoir envoyé _(I love you sweet angel, thank the grace of God for sending you to us)." He whispered, his voice strained and thick with emotion. He knew she wouldn't understand, and that was the point. He wasn't ready just yet to hand over his heart so willingly when he felt unsure of himself like a young boy, but he had to get it out, lest it eat him alive. Lila had no idea what he had said, but it felt important, his tone was heavy, emotional, and she found her heart clenching.

"Murph?" She asked softly, moving away to look at him properly. He looked so troubled as he looked into her eyes, almost like he was about to burst into tears and she had all but forgot that they were in the middle of the bar. Lucky for her, people had gathered it was a private moment as they watched the darker twin just hold her for the longest time without words, now they had turned away. It was plain for anyone to see what this girl mean to the boys.

She leant forward, kissing his lips sweetly and feeling him melt into her. She wrapped her arm around him when she broke the kiss, giving him one of her typical Lila hugs that the brothers loved so much. Murphy shivered, feeling her breath tickle his ear and he swallowed thickly.

"Don't shut me out again Murphy, I don't like it." She whispered, sounding so sad it made his heart hurt. He tensed a little, feeling caught out that she had tried to reach him and she couldn't. But he had no choice. It was all so intense, his feelings for her, he wouldn't be surprised if she made a dash out the door and never fucking returned.

"M'sorry m'girl." He replied, actually sounding contrite and she knew he was genuinely sorry. She knew he wouldn't have done so unless there was a good reason, but it bugged her not to know what said reason was. She moved away from him, giving him a smile, and the very sight of it made a grin of his own spread onto his face. She reached out a hand for the lighter twin sat right by them, and Connor smiled, reaching out and kissing her hand.

She gave them both a look before moving away and going behind the bar ready to work. Aileen looked at her with a knowing smile, having watched the whole exchange like it was the best thing she had ever seen. She could see it, as clear as day, the three of them were so in love with each other, they had a bond like no one else. She was happy for the girl. Murphy wiped a hand over his face, feeling himself finally calm as he sat next to his brother. Connor reached out, rubbing the back of Murphy's neck in the brotherly way he did, soothing and calming him.

"_Non come te per usare il tuo capo fratello _(Not like you to use your head brother)." Connor muttered carefully, glancing to the side to his twin. Murphy leant his arms on the bar as he turned his head to look at him.

"_Je sais, j'ai juste ... étouffé. Je me sentais si peu sûr de moi. Je ne pense pas qu'elle soit prête _(I know, I just...choked. I felt so unsure of myself. I don't think she's ready)." He admitted looking torn about it all. Connor hummed, nodding his head slightly as he rubbed Murphy's neck before letting him go. He'd never known his twin to not just follow his heart and he had felt the war raging inside of the dark-haired twin as he fought to push the words down. It was almost comical how his brother had resorted to telling her in a language she couldn't understand so he didn't burst at the seams.

"Quick thinkin' about tellin' her in French brother, thought ye might explode if ye didn't tell her." Connor smirked amused at him, knowing his brother wouldn't have time to answer since the girl in question was on her way over with two beers. Murphy gave his brother an indignant scowl for his mocking before glancing to the angel on the other side of the bar, their angel. Lila grinned as she placed the beers in front of them, the mood seemed lighter and if their faces were anything to go by, they were bickering in their usual way. Murphy gave his brother another scowl and Lila snorted as Connor barked a laugh. She reached over the bar, poking Murphy's cheeks and pulling it into a smile, it only served to make Connor laugh harder. Murphy squinted at her, nipping playfully at her fingers and making her giggle.

He couldn't help but smile at her, she was fucking perfect and made him feel like he may turn to mush at any moment. He had no doubt he'd have to tell her soon, her presence was raging a thunderous storm inside of him and he was never one to be able to contain his emotions. Connor sipped his beer and gave his brother a knowing look, watching as Lila grabbed Murphy's hand, kissing it sweetly. When she let go, she grabbed Connors and repeated the gesture, giving them both a wide smile that made them grin like lovesick fools, even in front of everyone. It was a sight to behold for the patrons in the bar. The boys had never been with someone for more than sex, and anyone with eyes could see this was way more than that. So naturally, some of them stared curiously, wonderous even at the girl that had tamed the two wild Irish lads. But the boys didn't care, let them stare, let them see that the three of them were meant to be together, they weren't embarrassed about it or ashamed, fuck, they were proud. Because to them, Lila was the most beautiful and precious thing ever to exist and she belonged to them, she was all theirs, and it made them fill with such male pride. They didn't care what anyone said about their unconventional relationship, they didn't care what people thought when they saw their lovesick faces follow her wherever she went in the bar. They didn't fucking care, because they were together, finally, and now they felt at home, finally complete. And that was all that mattered.


	24. Chapter 24

**The boys confess their sins, Murphy worries about judgement and feels conflicted, and they have some wonderful MacManus interaction on the way home. Love the brotherly fluff in this one. **

**Let me know if you guys want some more Connor and Murphy fluff mixed in here. I try to sprinkle it in but they're never really away from the girl. :')**

**I know I've already completed the series, but I'm open to changing and adding things that you guys want!**

**This one is part one of this fine Sunday. I had to split it from the next one since it would be way too long as one big chapter.**

The next day was Sunday, it was the brothers favourite day of the week for a number of reasons. The three had a set routine on Sundays, the boys going to early mass, leaving a sleeping Lila behind. They'd come back to her cooking breakfast for them which was always amazing. Then they'd lay in bed, Connor lay propped up against the pillows with his legs spread, Lila lay between them with her back to his chest. Murphy would lay between Lilas' legs on his side, his head on her stomach and his hand stroking her thigh as she read them one of Connors books. Connor loved the fact the lass loved to read, just like he did. Having something in common with her. He loved it when they discussed books or she recommended some to him, or when they had a good debate about one. Murphy wasn't a reader, he was a writer. He'd always struggled to read since his attention span wasn't great. He would get lost in his own thoughts and not be able to focus on the words on the page, it would frustrate him to no end and he would just give up. But hearing Lila read to them, her smooth as silk voice as she read the words, it had his undivided attention and he found himself enjoying literature properly for the first time. At around 11, Lila would always untangle herself from the boys to get the Sunday roast started. It was always a fucking feast and it was delicious. Rocco would come to eat with them without fail and a few times Aileen and Doc had come over too, Doc bringing some extra chairs for them to sit at the table. It was always a tight squeeze when it was the 6 of them at the table, but it felt like a real family and they all loved it.

The boys would always ask her on Saturday night if she would accompany them to early mass the next morning, which was always met with a 'no thanks' straight away. They would be a little disappointed but never show it, it wasn't exactly a game changer for them, they would still love her regardless. They knew she had been through a lot of things in her life, and she had mentioned in passing how she hadn't attended church since her father was murdered. She hadn't made peace with God for that yet, that much was obvious, and even if she never did, the boys wouldn't ever judge her for it. She was never rude or disrespectful about their faith, she never mocked them when they said a quick thanks to God before their family meals, or acted like she judged them for their faith. Hell, they even caught her crossing herself and muttering a 'Mother Mary full of grace' a few times after taking the Lord's name in vain, which made them grin to each other at how they were rubbing off on her. It wasn't that she had no faith at all, she wouldn't bother crossing herself if that was the case because she wouldn't care, she just hadn't forgiven God for hurting her and her family yet. The boys couldn't imagine what it was like, they had never been in that position before, of having someone you loved taken away from them so cruelly, to feel that heavy grief. Murphy recalled the night she came to the loft in hysterics after her granda had died, when he himself had cried to Connor, asking him brokenly why she had to go through this. '_Christ Connor, why her? Why does she have te go through this?' _He himself had questioned God's logic behind the whole thing, despite his unwavering faith, he had pleaded with the big man upstairs to ease her pain, to fucking give it to him instead so he could carry the heavy burden on his shoulders, just so she didn't have to. God worked in mysterious ways sometimes, and sometimes those ways left you in pain. It was always harder when you didn't understand why it had happened, but they were just mere mortals, they weren't supposed to fully understand God.

The night before though, they had been watching tv on the couch. Lila was sat with her back to Connor, his body angled so she was settled between his legs and he had his arms wrapped around her, hand over her heart. She had her legs over Murphy and he was stroking her legs. When Connor had asked once more if she would come with them the next morning, they felt her tense. She was actually quiet, as if contemplating rather than just giving them an instant flat out no, which made them hopeful. She didn't say anything, just shook her head softly, her eyes never leaving the tv. Murphy could see her face with being the one facing her, he could tell she wasn't really watching tv, she just couldn't meet their eyes. Both boys, despite touching her, couldn't feel her, like she was blocking them. They could have easily delved inside her mind, they were more experienced than her and they doubted she would be very good at keeping them out. But they would never betray her trust like that, after all, like Murphy had told her, it's invasive. It was one thing for the brothers to do it to each other, but it was another for them to do it to her. To just go in uninvited and know what she was thinking about the whole thing. Despite her saying no, they still smiled at each other, because she had hesitated, she had actually thought about it, and that was a step forward. They felt that maybe soon she would join them, come back into the church and re-find her faith in God again.

The boys had gone about their usual routine, slipping out of bed with a kiss to the girl's cheek as she slept. They got dressed in silence and left as they went to mass. They sat through the service, respectful, thoughtful, thrumming with energy that only their faith could give them. They always felt more alive after mass. They waited for confession afterwards. They didn't go every week to confession, the requirement by the Catholic church was at least once a month, taking your lovely list of sins with you. The boys went at least once every two weeks though, depending on their sinful ways that week. They could wait and go once a month like most other people, but the twins could never feel settled until they were squared away with God, back in his good books.

Murphy paced a little as he waited for his turn, he was fidgety and anxious and it made Connor snort a little, the light-haired twin stood there as cool as a cucumber. He knew Murphy was anxious about confessing their amazing time with Lila, they were unmarried after all. It wasn't like they had not confessed to things like this before, they would always have to confess after they'd been will a lass since it was out of wedlock. But Murphy felt this was so much worse somehow, because he loved her. In Connors' eyes, it made it better, that they genuinely loved her, and although they couldn't marry her since there were two of them, he knew they would marry her if they had the chance to do so, the intent was there, he felt like it was good enough for God because he wouldn't have sent her to them in the first place otherwise.

But Murphy felt weird about the whole thing, about not being able to marry her, about he and his brother both being in love with a lass they'd both never get to put a ring on. He hadn't really thought about it until the confessional was glaring at him like a siren in the night. The night before, he had been proud, publicly claiming her as theirs and wanting the world to know it. Yet here, in the light of day in the House of the Lord, it weighed heavy on him. He was worried. Worried of being judged by the priest, by God, he was worried he was condemning Lila to hell for being with them, that Connor would be too. He was always in his own damn head too much, worrying about everything, overthinking things. That was why Connor graciously let his brother go first, knowing he'd probably keel over and die of anxiety if he had to wait. The person in the booth slipped out and Murphy looked to his brother for reassurance. Connor reached out, squeezing his neck a little and giving him a nod. Murphy took a deep inhale and walked into the booth, shutting the door behind him as he sat down and crossed himself, his hand clutching his rosary so tight he thought it might cut into his hand.

"Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. It's been two weeks since me last confession…"

The boys left the church after confession feeling better, once again squared away with the big man and feeling good. They always felt a buzz thrumming through their veins after church. They slid on their shades, getting their smokes out and lighting them in smooth synchronization. Passersby looked at them curiously. There was something about the brothers, their confidence, their faith… fucking something, but it commanded authority and people looked on with slight awe of them.

"Penances?" Connor asked, looking to his brother carefully before inhaling his smoke. Murphy rubbed his lower lip in thought, glancing to his brother sheepishly before looking back out in front of him and taking a drag of his smoke.

"20 Hail Marys." He muttered, amusement coloring his words as his ears turned pink. Connor barked out a loud laugh as he looked at his brother, some people looking on amused at the pair.

"20?! How the fuck ye manage that one?!" He asked incredulously. Murphy snorted, shaking his head as he blushed deeper.

"Fuck off! I fucked the lass out o' wedlock remember, ye only got yer cock sucked." He retorted, shooting his brother a playful look. It made Connor laugh louder, slapping his brother on the back.

"Aye, that I fuckin' did brother." He smirked, inhaling his smoke again. Murphy glanced curiously to his brother, licking his lower lip.

"How many ye get?" He asked as he quirked a brow at him.

"10." He grinned, looking all innocent like butter wouldn't fucking melt, Murphy just scowled at him, huffing as he shook his head, Connor laughing at him once more.

"Hope ye told him ye had yer cock sucked _whilst_ yer own brother was eatin' her out and had his fingers inside o' her." Murphy smirked devilishly as he pointed at him, smoke dangling from his fingers, Connor choked on the smoke in his lungs and Murphy snorted loudly at him. Connor looked to him with wide eyes, actually blushing and Murphy cackled evilly at him.

"Jesus Murphy! O' course I did, what's the point in confessin' if we don't fuckin' confess?!" He asked with an incredulous laugh, still not believing his brothers choice of words. He crossed himself for his own use of words before his brother could chide him with a '_Lords fuckin' name'_. His face was flushed and Murphy knew he had definitely told the priest, he knew himself just how awkward _that_ shit was. Murphy laughed, leaning into Connor as the lighter haired twin slung his arm around his shoulder as they made their way home to the girl who had lead them to confession.

They didn't regret it though, they both knew God had sent her their way. They knew it was unconventional, the three of them. It wasn't exactly a typical Catholic thing, no plans to marry, two guys and one lass. But they knew, deep inside of them, unwavering and full of faith, this was God's work. He didn't always work the way you expected him to. The boys were their own people of course, but at the same time, they were like two sides of the same coin, like one soul split between two bodies, twin flames as it were. So it seemed fitting that their soulmate would be one lass. One amazing lass who could handle the both of them, who could encroach their twin bond in some divine inhuman way. It had to be God's work. They may have wondered if they only loved her, but the bond they shared, the fact she shared in their twin connection, there was no possible explanation other than something of the supernatural kind. And that was all the reassurance they needed.

When they entered the loft, they were met with the wonderful smell of breakfast and the glorious sight of their girl in Murphy's shirt and nothing else as she cooked for them. It made their chest swell as they hung their rosaries up and shucked off their coats. She turned to look at them, giving them her bright smile and they had no choice but to return it. Murphy went straight to her, as usual, and kissed her sweetly on the lips as his brother made his way over near them. She moved over to him, kissing him much like how Murphy had kissed her, before going to plate up the food as the boys sat at the table.

"How did it go?" She asked with a wry smile, as if she knew exactly what they had said to the priest. She did. She had been there and part of the sinning after all. The brothers glanced to each other, smirking slightly and Connor wiped a hand over his face, once again feeling his cheeks burn. Lila had to stop herself from laughing at actually seeing Connor blush.

"Went fine m'girl. We're good with the big man, all's right with the world." Murphy grinned at her, giving her a cheeky wink that made her laugh. She brought the plates over and sat down.

"Mhm...I'm sure God's gonna smite me for corrupting his two favorite Irishmen." She snorted, glancing at them both. The boys shared a look before looking back at her.

"Trust me lass, we've long been corrupted. Don't be worryin' yer pretty little head about us and God." He smiled warmly at her. Connor and Murphy bowed their heads in prayer before the food, as they always did. Lila usually just watched in awe of the brothers and their unwavering faith. But today, she too bowed her head, thanking the big guy upstairs for gracing her with two beautiful souls to keep her on the right path. When the boys were done, they didn't mention the fact she too had prayed, they knew it would make her feel uncomfortable and close off. But they were happy with the turn of events.

They all started to dig into their food, the boys moaning in appreciation. The lass was one hell of a cook, they hadn't eaten so well since they left Ireland. The boys would never tell their Ma but Lila was an even better cook. But that news would surely warrant the woman flying over and beating the holy hell out of them both, so they'd just keep it between each other.

"Ye know love, ye should come with us next week te mass." Murphy said casually, glancing at her. Connor squinted a little at him, not wanting him to push her, lest she push back twice as hard. The lass was already considering it, she didn't need pushing into it. Murphy looked to his twin, no words needed and Connor sighed as he continued to eat. Murphy for some reason, still weirdly hung up about their relationship, thought that maybe Lila coming back to the church might help somehow. Connor didn't know what was wrong with him, it had been him that first said the girl was sent to them by God, now out of nowhere he seemed worried of being judged and condemned to hell for his sins. Or more like Lila would be, the poor boy seemed worried about her soul more than his own.

Lila sighed a little, pushing the food around on her plate as she looked between the brothers, seeing them having some kind of mental conversation after Murphy's words. Words that hung heavy in the air. She had been thinking about it. She had not been to the church since her dad was killed, despite her mother trying relentlessly. But she still felt abandoned by God after the things she had been through, more so after her granda died. But when she looked at these two amazingly devout men, something stirred inside of her. Her granda would have died whether or not they had been in her life, but they had been by her side, they had helped her through it. And she knew she wouldn't have been able to move past it on her own. It was like God knew she would need someone, and he sent her his two best angels to wrap her in their protective wings. And as the days wore on, she found herself becoming more grateful to God for sending them to her. As if it was somehow making up for his earlier treatment of her. She knew it was only fair she went and said thanks after all. She missed the feeling of church. Even as a child she was strong in her faith and she went even during weekdays to mass or chat to the priest with her father. Church felt like home to her, it made her feel safe and soothed her soul in a way she couldn't even begin to describe.

The twins looked to her anxiously, her silence unsettled them and Murphy kicked himself for even speaking, the look Connor was giving him did not help any, his brother was annoyed at him.

"Okay." She said softly after what felt like forever. The boys sat up straighter, looking at her surprised, they hadn't expected it to be that easy.

"Are ye sure lass, ye don't have te just 'cause Murph's pushin' ye." Connor said carefully, shooting his twin a look. Murphy had the decency to look contrite and chewed his lower lip.

"I'm sure. I've been thinking about it anyway. I haven't had much reason to go...with everything that went on. Da… granda...but now I have something to thank him for...well two things actually." She smiled softly, her cheeks blushing as she looked down at her plate. She couldn't look at them when such sappy words were leaving her mouth. What a fucking girl.

Murphy swallowed thickly, the weight of her words looming over him and he fought the urge to cry like a fucking little bitch. Being so emotional and sentimental was a pain in the ass sometimes. But as he glanced to his counterpart, the harder hearted brother, he noticed even he too looked a little misty-eyed. She had basically said they were the reason for her wanting to make good with God, to fucking thank him for _them_. It made them feel all sorts of good and they both reached out, taking her hands in unison. She braved a glance at them and her breathing hitched a little, seeing the adoration on their faces as they smiled at her. They looked at her like a rare penny or something, like she was a treasure, something fascinating that they'd never seen before. Like they'd found something no one else had ever seen. It was overwhelming. She gave them a shy smile, cheeks flushing once more before she took her hands back, going back to her food. The boys could tell she felt a little overwhelmed and even awkward, so they went back to a lighter mood, ribbing each other for anything and everything to make her laugh over breakfast. She was grateful for their ability to be goofs, even right after intense things. It made her feel easier about everything. Being with the pair was intense and it made her head spin sometimes, but they read her just as well as she read them and they always knew when to make things less serious, being the usual silly MacManus twins.


	25. Chapter 25

**Some AMAZING hot and heavy shit in here, and then some good ol' teasing. I didn't intend on making it so long but there's a lot of internal monologue that needed to happen and for some reason, this Sunday is just never fucking ending.**

**I don't know if anyone else has noticed that I seem to do more internal monologues of Murphy's than Connor's, or even Lila's for that matter which is hilarious because she's my OC. I don't know why, he just doesn't shut up, he's in my head and he won't let me rest until I write it. I'll try and get more of Connor's thoughts in here at some point.**

The three were lay in bed together as usual, after the glorious Sunday breakfast that Lila had cooked them. Connor was lay against the pillows, half sat up as he was propped up by them. Lila was lay with her back leaning against his firm chest, his legs either side of her and his hand over her heart in the way she loved so much. Murphy was lay on his side with his head resting on her stomach. He had pushed her shirt up so he could rest his cheek on her bare skin and his hand was stroking her thigh lightly. She was reading Romeo and Juliet, it had been one of her favourites since she was about 14. Connor had asked her to read it for them and Murphy was actually enjoying it. Since he had issues reading himself due to his concentration, Shakespeare was a fucking no go because Murphy didn't understand half of the shite the man was saying, but hearing her with Shakespeare's words rolling off her tongue had him feeling all kinds of things. She had been reading, the three of them relaxed, but Murphy's hands started wandering. It wasn't that he wasn't paying attention, he was, but he was so close to his new favorite place and her scent was intoxicating. He'd had a taste of her now, he couldn't get it out of his mind. She was like a new drug to him, calling to him so he could feel her singing through his veins.

His hand slipped into the side of her panties, teasing her slit. She gasped, the book temporarily forgotten as she tensed in Connors' arms. If she could see Connor behind her, she would know that he was wearing a matching smirk to his brother, who was looking up at her devilishly. Murphy's hands stilled, raising a brow at her because she stopped reading. She could feel the heat sweep up her body as she gripped the book.

"Keep readin' lass." Connor growled in her ear, the unexpected commanding tone making her even wetter. She swallowed thickly, glancing back to the book.

"**Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, Which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss**." Her voice faltered when Murphy started stroking her again and her heart was beating rapidly in her chest. She couldn't help but close her eyes, a moan leaving her lips the second Murphy decided to push her panties to the side and give her a teasing lick.

"**Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?**" Connor purred in her ear, not even needing to read the book since he knew the play word by word. She shivered, her back arching a little as she ground herself to Murphys face more. Hearing Connors husky Irish brogue in her ear whilst Murphy was going down on her was driving her senses wild. This had been the second time Murphy had done this to her, he seemed like the type to enjoy going down on a girl.

Connors' hands slipped up her shirt, grabbing her breasts firmly and giving them a squeeze as she moaned softly, squirming against him. He growled a little, she felt it rumble in his chest. She knew he wanted her to keep reading.

"**Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.**" She whispered between moans, Murphy slipped two fingers inside of her to add more sensation as he sucked on her clit. She felt like she had died and gone to heaven. She bucked her hips desperately at his painfully slow pace and Connors' hand came to her stomach, holding her still for his brother.

"**O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn te despair.**" He whispered, his breath tickling her ear. She whined pitifully, the whole thing was extremely erotic and she'd never done something like this before. It was like talking dirty fucking Shakespeare style.

"**Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake**." She moaned, gasping and bucking again as Murphy hit that sweet spot inside of her. She could feel him smirking against her and they locked eyes. His eyes were dark and sparkling with mischief. Connors hand that wasn't holding her stomach came to knead her breast, pinching her nipple and making her arch her back again.

"**Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take. Thus from my lips, by yers, my sin is purged**." He smirked, nipping her ear teasingly. She felt like she was about to explode, she was so fucking close she could practically taste it. They were driving her to the brink of insanity with Connors words and Murphy's teasing ministrations.

"**Then have my lips the sin that they have took.**" It sounded like a plea even to her own ears as the words left her lips. The desperation in her voice as clear as day. The brothers locked eyes for a moment, feeling the intensity of the whole thing. They too found it erotic and they were enjoying her desperation, how needy she was for them.

"**Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged. **_**Give me my sin again**_**.**" Connor purred huskily, taking her lobe in his teeth and sucking on it.

She couldn't focus anymore, fuck the book. It fell from her hands as one arm came up, winding around Connors' neck as she gripped his hair tightly and arched her back. The other hand went to Murphys hair as she ground herself on him wantonly. The brothers moaned in unison. They loved how she had no shame about all this, making it clear how much she was enjoying it with her loud needy moans. Suddenly, a loud knock came from the door and Murphy faltered only for a brief moment as Connor and Lila looked over to the door. The boys looked at each other, smirking wickedly as Connor covered her mouth with his hand. She moaned loud again, muffled by his hand as Murphy fucked her harder with his fingers, sucking more vigorously on her clit. She was almost thrashing about now and the brothers were struggling to hold her still. She was right on the brink, but knowing someone was right there, it was like an invisible barrier was stopping her. Her breathing was labored as she moaned into Connors' hand, body writhing and tears pricked her eyes out of sheer desperation form not being able to cum, it was fucking torture.

"Cum for us lass." Connor whispered, still playing with her nipples. She knew he couldn't see her face, but Murphy was still staring at her, loving her face as she was falling apart in front of them. She couldn't talk with the hand over her mouth but he saw the desperate look in her eyes. She was too far gone to try the telepathy thing to let them know she was fucking trying but the person interrupting them had put her off. As if on cue, another loud knock sounded from the door.

She whined pitifully and Murphy reached out, grasping Connor wrist so tight it would bruise. He too was pretty far gone without even being touched, the both of them were coming apart with her. He couldn't just look to his brother and send him the message, he had to reach out and touch him since he was so lost in the moment. Connor heard him loud and clear. '_She can't cum wit' someone out there. Fuckin' make her, remember the diner.' _Connor didn't need any further instruction as he nipped and sucked his way to the desperate squirming girl's ear.

"Fuckin' cum for us now Lila, don't be a naughty lass, we'll have te punish ye." He growled, his voice dark and commanding. It was like her mind fractured for a moment, the crack splitting off and she shattered into a million and one pieces. Her back arched violently. Her hands gripping Connors thighs so tight she knew she was cutting him with her nails, but she couldn't think about it. A scream tore its way out of her throat, muffled by Connors' hand but still fucking impressive, the boys felt proud of the noise they had torn from her. Her body shook from the intensity of the almost violent orgasm as she tried to catch her breath. She barely registered when Murphy pulled away and Connors' hand left her mouth.

She was lay slumped against the lighter twin, feeling like she had no bones left in her body. Murphy smirked at her devilishly as he licked his lips and wiped his mouth, making her flush, and then he smirked at his brother, no words needed once again. Connor tapped her thigh, signaling for her to get up and Murphy went to the door. Lila stood on shaky legs, they hadn't quite caught back up with her brain, but luckily Connor was on hand to wrap an arm around her and steady her. When Murphy slung the door open, not caring he was sporting an impressive erection that was pushing against the confines of his jeans, he was met by a flustered looking Rocco. The man's cheeks were red and he looked anywhere but at Murphy and it was clear the man had heard her, Murphy would be surprised if all of Boston hadn't fucking heard her. He loved the fact that was his and his brothers doing. Murphy let him in, giving him the smuggest smirk in the fucking world as he shut the door behind him.

"I...uh...I didn't mean to fuckin' interrupt or nothin'...it just...dinner and all." Rocco nervously rambled, scratching the back of his neck as he couldn't even look at Lila. She was now stood in the kitchen, still just in Murphy's shirt. She was usually dressed by now and he didn't want to get caught staring at her bare legs, not after what he had just heard. Connor walked over, slapping him on the back affectionately and Murphy snorted, making his way over to Lila to help her prepare the food.

Connor noticed Rocco couldn't look at the girl, he was far too amused with the whole thing, watching how his friend squirmed feeling awkward.

"Don't tell me ye got off on hearin' our wee lass Roc!" Connor laughed loudly, looking incredulous and like the whole thing was the funniest thing to happen ever. Lila blushed wildly, lowering her head in embarrassment with a smile at the fact her best friend just heard her having an earth-shattering orgasm. Murphy whipped around to look at him, scowling bloody murder at the man and Connor barked an even louder laugh. Rocco shifted under the intense look of the dark twin, but his mouth and brain weren't friends today it seemed.

"Well yeah...I mean no! It's just...fuckin' hell...I'm sure everyone down at fuckin' McGinty's heard her man! She's got a set of lungs on her!" He defended himself, making Lila snort a laugh and cover her face, so fucking embarrassed. Murphy wasn't mad though, it was funny, and he knew Rocco wasn't a threat, but he was still possessive, he was still Murphy after all.

"Eyes back in yer head funny man or I'll scoop 'em out and feed 'em te ye." He snorted, trying to keep his scowl but failing.

He looked to Lila and saw her standing there beet red, her hands shaking a little as she cut the potatoes. He reached out and stroked her hair soothingly.

"Yer early Roc, don't make a habit te ruin all the fun aye? Ye fuckin' freaked our lass out so bad she damn near didn't cum at all." Connor laughed, slapping him on the back again when the man blushed once more.

"Connor!" Lila shouted, mortified and wide-eyed as she glared at him. It was bad enough Rocco had heard her, now he was just being a dick. Murphy's glorious laugh filled up the loft at how embarrassed she was. She was too cute sometimes. She shot a glare to him and he stopped laughing abruptly, making a locking motion on his mouth that he wouldn't say a word. Connor sauntered over, slinging an arm around her and pulled her into his side where she fit so perfectly.

"C'mon _A Ghrá mo Chroí_ (My hearts beloved), don't be mad at us. Can't help us feelin' proud for that fuckin' scream we ripped out o' ye." He smirked wickedly at her. She pinched his nipple as she sneered at him and he yelped, moving away and rubbing it as he gave her an indigent scowl. Rocco and Murphy burst out laughing at him.

"Fuck the both o' ye!" Connor grumped as he pointed to his brother and best friend, playfully smacking Lilas ass on the way to sit at the table. She shot him a playful glare but he could see the smile tugging at her lips. She wasn't really mad. He was happy. They always teased each other, that's what they did.

Murphy came up behind her as Rocco joined Connor at the table, he wrapped his arms around her, setting his hands on her belly.

"Does this get me off the hook for the sloppy second's comment I made yesterday?" He asked all sweet like, making her snort loudly. Like he was glad Connor was in trouble and not just him.

"Sloppy seconds? You called her sloppy seconds?!" Rocco asked with an incredulous laugh. Lila shot him a look to shut him up and nudged Murphy away from her so she could put the food in the oven.

"Aye he did, the right arse, 'cause he fucked her first. She sucked me cock though, ain't like the lass didn't acknowledge me existence." Connor huffed, sounding offended as Rocco and Murphy burst into fits of laughter. Her eyes went wide, not believing the brothers were just coming out with this to Rocco, whilst she was stood _right_ there. She knew this must be how they relayed the conquests usually to their best friend, but their usual conquests weren't also best fucking friends with the funny man. She turned around, pointing her knife at Murphy and then his twin, and the three men looked at her cautiously. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned and all that. Especially a fiery redhead with a fucking knife in her hand.

"You're both in trouble. Maybe I'll just find someone else to satisfy me whilst you two are on probation. You have any plans later Rocco?" She asked innocently, smiling sickly sweet at the hairy man as his eyes widened, his face flushing as if he had no clue what fucking planet he was on with her propositioning him.

Connor couldn't help the booming laugh that fell from his lips, the look on Rocco's face was priceless. Murphy's eyes darkened though as he looked at her, backing her up a little until her back was pressed flush to the counter. Lila put the knife down, looking at him with a defiant smirk and a quirked brow.

"Ye belong te us _little_ _lass_, I ain't above murder if anyone else touches ye." He stated, eyes dancing with amusement, showing he wasn't really mad as he looked at her and then Rocco to prove a point. Rocco blanched a little and held his hands up in surrender, only making Connor laugh more. The idea of someone else touching her did make fire burn through Murphy's veins though, but he wasn't angry, he just really wanted to fuck her again. Even with the current guest sat there. He had been left painfully horny after what they had done, and her words only made his possessive side worse. Murphy stared at her, his eyes smoldering and she couldn't look away, as if his gaze was intoxicating. She felt like she forgot to breathe for a moment, just watching him look at her like she was dinner, a slight wicked smirk growing on his face. Her breathing hitched when she heard him without him moving his lips. '_Ye are dinner cailín álainn (beautiful girl).' _He had been in her damn head, or she had been thinking it so intently she had accidentally pushed it onto him, she figured it was the latter since she knew neither brother would just roam around inside her brain without confirming it was okay first. Her cheeks flushed bright red at his gaze, his fucking words and she could feel him so intensely even without him touching her, he wanted her. Badly.

Connor cleared his throat, making the pair snap their eyes to him, like they hadn't been locked in an intense stare off. Rocco looked confused and like he was about to laugh and Connor quirked his brow at her with a smirk, he'd obviously heard her too and she blushed even harder. Nothing was sacred anymore, heaven help her.

"Jesus fuck, you two done eye fuckin' each other over there?!" Rocco laughed loudly, looking at the pair quizzically. Lilas' cheeks stayed crimson, the man didn't even know the half of it. Connor could feel the intense energy still radiating and he shifted in his seat, putting Murphys feeling in a box separate from his own. He smiled at their lass, holding a hand out to her. She grinned at him, walking over obediently and he pulled her sideways on his lap, his arms encasing her. He made her feel so safe and cared for and she nuzzled his neck sweetly.

She heard Murphy grumble behind her but he went to the fridge, getting them all some beers before he sat at the table, watching his brother and their girl. He couldn't stay mad at his brother for interrupting them, it warmed his heart to see them together. He never thought he'd see the day with Connor in love. Hell, he didn't think he'd see the day he was, but as the over emotional of the two, he always felt like maybe he would fall in love one day, whereas he never saw it for his brother. As much as he loved sex, the female body in general, he never had the want for a permanent lass, because he had his brother. But he did have a deep yearning for something, something stable, someone to care for him in that way. But he always felt that would come at a price, and that price would be distance from his brother. Even in their brief casual encounters, the girls wanted them apart, made comments about them being gay with each other, how they were wrong and sinners. And that wasn't the case at all. They didn't think of each other in that way, it was nothing of the sort. And to be accused of that, whilst they were devout Catholic no less, it hurt him deeper than he'd ever admit. He didn't want to risk his brother, he would never lose him, he would end his own life, as much of a mortal sin as it were, before he ever let that happen. So he never bothered to look for someone for more than sex. He knew his brother didn't have that same yearning, so it didn't bother him. But sometimes Murphy had found himself wondering what if he could meet a lass that would accept his bond with his brother. And then Lila happened.

Fucking Lila and her wild red hair, her Irish blood with her American accent, her bright blue eyes that could see right through them, her pouty lips that had so much sass coming out of them it was ridiculous, her wondrous smile that lit up a whole room. She was perfect, and never once in her time knowing them, even first meeting them, did she question them or their bond, did she ever act repulsed or like they were weird, did she try and cause trouble to make them fight. The very first time she thought they had fought, she had been so upset and worried, she had demanded they made up. She just knew their bond, she knew of their telepathy, she knew it all without them even saying a word and she was right there with them on the same wavelength. There was no other person in the world that Murphy could imagine being with. He wasn't even interested in other lasses for sex now and that was unusual in itself. Both he and his brother had never been exclusive with someone, they never wanted to. They loved to look, fuck they loved to touch, even when in casual relationships with other girls, they sought out others to have sex with. But now it was just Lila, it was all they wanted, they didn't want another person for anything. They had all they needed right there with her.


	26. Chapter 26

**Short and sweet, but Connor needed his turn with the lass.**

**Hot and heavy things ahead, enjoy!**

Lila was humming softly to herself as she washed the dishes in the sink. Murphy was in bed snoring away with his brother, but she had woke before them. She was too tired the night before to do the dishes, so the sink was full. She always felt unsettled if the place wasn't clean and sorted so she figured she would do them before making the boys breakfast. She jumped when hands suddenly settled on her hips from behind, she felt the twin nuzzle her neck softly. She smiled to herself as the hands slipped around to her stomach, hitching Murphy's shirt up to touch her bare skin on her belly and she noticed it was Connor again. Both boys liked to hold her like this but Connor seemed to visit her whilst she was at the sink for some reason.

"Mornin' sweetheart." He rasped against her neck, placing a soft kiss there. It made her heart beat funny and her breathing hitch just slightly. His fingers were idly stroking her stomach under her shirt.

"Morning you handsome devil." She smirked, scrubbing a pot that seemed to not want to get clean. She should have soaked them overnight and she sighed to herself. Connor suddenly nipped her neck playfully and she gasped, it sent a jolt right through her. It seemed he wanted all of her attention and the pot was taking that away. He turned her around, his hands sliding down to her ass as he smirked at her. She blinked up at him, her cheeks flushing as she reacted to his hands and his smirk. His eyes were dark and full of need and she could feel it.

Now they had crossed the line of being intimate with her, Connor didn't want to take things slow. They had already passed that line, they were so far past the fucking line they couldn't even see it anymore, so why shouldn't he have some fun whilst he was there? He had woken to up see her humming, her hips swaying slightly, and he fucking wanted her. He hadn't had his turn with the lass yet, and he was getting impatient. He had never wanted someone this much, he usually let the lass do the chasing, that's how he liked it, them coming to him. But with Lila he didn't care, not with this, he would fucking beg her if he had to at this rate. Murphy had told him in great detail about how she felt around his cock and he wanted to experience that for himself.

He was staring her down and she just stood there, almost like a scared animal. Connor always had this air of authority about him, and with this sexually charged energy, his dominance was making her instantly submissive, and she was waiting for his next move, because she knew without a doubt, he would make a move, she could tell from the look in his eyes. He leant forward, brushing his nose against hers as his hands squeezed her ass cheeks, making a soft moan come from her lips, he fucking relished in the sound. His hands slid up again, bringing the shirt with them as he started to pull it off her. She lifted her arms, complying to him and he tossed it carelessly to the side. His brooding eyes roamed her body as she stood there in just a pair of purple lace panties. She was a fucking vision and he felt the deep need to claim her.

His hand grabbed the back of her neck, the other splayed on her bare back as he crashed his lips to hers. His kiss was hard, yet still somehow controlled, and she melted into him easily, her arms winding around his neck. Her breasts were pushed against his chest and the friction on her nipples as he kissed her breathless made her moan again. The noises were driving him insane and the hand on her back moved, pulling at her panties. He was struggling through with just one hand. He broke the kiss and looked at her so intensely she almost stopped breathing.

"Take 'em fuckin' off, now." He demanded, his voice low and thick with need. She swallowed thickly, nodding as she quickly took them off and kicked them to the side.

He suddenly grabbed her ass, picking her up and taking her to the bed. He dropped her on the bed and she bounced a little, looking at him with wide eyes. She could faintly register Murphy still snoring over the whooshing of blood in her ears. She watched as he took his boxers off, his impressive length springing free and stood to attention. He crawled onto the bed, looking at her like he was going to eat her and it made her whole body set alight. He hovered over her, teasing her as he brushed his lips against her own. She leant up trying to catch them but he moved away, a dark chuckle rumbling in his chest as he watched her, all needy for him, he fucking loved it.

"Such a needy lass sweetheart." He purred against her lips, smirking slightly as he enjoyed teasing her. She whined, actually whined and he gave in, kissing her deeply, his tongue tangling with hers.

He ground himself on her, eliciting another moan from her but louder this time and he swallowed it greedily. Her hand went into his hair and she tugged on it a little, he growled at her in response, grabbing his cock and lining it up with her. She was shaking from the anticipation and when he slid inside of her, she gasped loudly, her eyes fluttering shut with a moan. He let out his own deep moan, Murphy wasn't wrong, she was fucking tight. So warm and wet around him, it was fucking heaven, he just hoped he wouldn't go off after two seconds like a horny school boy.

He started thrusting, and unlike his brother who was hard and fast, his strokes were slow and deep, once again controlled, but it felt just as good. He leant his forearm near her head and he grabbed her thigh, kissing her sweet lips and he fucked her. She was moaning into the kiss, writhing underneath him and he smirked. He moved to kneel, grabbing her hips and bringing her to him, still inside of her. She lay there looking up at him, panting and wanton. She was lay on her back, her legs splayed either side of him and her hips angled a little because her ass was on his thighs.

The grip on her hips was tight as he started thrusting again, faster this time but still a steady pace. She took great delight in watching his face, being able to see it clearly as the sun shone through into the loft. He was moaning and grunting, his face contorted in pleasure as he closed his eyes, loving the feel of her. She was squirming on his cock, moaning loudly herself as she felt herself getting closer. She was too wrapped up in Connor's face to notice the darker twin now awake, watching her with rapt interest as he focused on her face. How her lips parted with soft sweet moans, gasping his brother's name, how her body writhed and arched. He bit his lower lip as his hand went to her stomach, touching softly with his fingertips. She jumped a little, her eyes going to him and they locked eyes for a second.

He wasn't smirking or smiling, just watching her with his pupils blown wide as his fingertips trailed down with feather light touch. She didn't even realise he had scooted closer to her, right next to her. His fingers found her clit and she moaned needily, making Connors pace falter for a minute at the fucking sound. So desperate for them, he'd never heard anything so sweet. Murphy rubbed circles around her clit, biting his lower lip as he watched her chest heave, she was so close to coming undone it was fucking fascinating to watch. He had never been much for watching, he didn't care too much. Sometimes he didn't really care if a lass got off at all, he was always too wrapped up in his own gratification. But seeing their girl like this, so desperate for them, it was the best thing he'd ever seen.

Her hand darted out, sliding into the darker twins boxers unexpectedly and he let out an embarrassingly needy moan himself, feeling her soft hand wrap around his cock. She started stroking him, her pace fast and showing him how close she was, she wanted him to cum with them.

"Fuckin' Christ m'girl." He panted, his hips arching up into her hand instantly. When did a hand job feel this fucking good? He heard Connor chuckle a little and he fought a smile himself, Lila didn't seem to care though as she was getting closer and closer to the edge. The loft was full of their moans, the three of them tangled together, sweaty and breathless. Connor angled her hips up more and he hit that spot inside of her that made her let out a keening moan. Murphy would be surprised if the police didn't get called at this rate when somebody reported a murder. She was so responsive, it was amazing. It wasn't any of that fake porno style shit lasses did sometimes either, it was raw and genuine lust and fucking desire that laced her desperate moans.

Connors moans were strained and his brother knew he was close. He was getting a little faster and her whole body was jarring with each thrust his brother gave her, her breasts bouncing slightly. Murphy squeezed eyes shut, so fucking close already it was almost embarrassing, but he didn't care. She wanted him to cum so he wasn't about to try to hold back. Suddenly, Lilas back arched up, loud desperate moans falling from her lips as she muttered curse words like she was fucking praying. She was spasming around Connors cock and he growled, the grip in her hips tightening as he lost it, rutting into her as he chased his own release. Watching her come undone like that was enough to push Murphy over the edge and he gasped, his body tensing and jerking as he came hard, shooting his load all over her hand.

Lila felt like it was lasting forever, her orgasm just never ending as the waves of pleasure crashed over her, over and over again. Connors thrusts became erratic as he cried out, spilling himself inside of her as he tensed up. The three of them were panting as they came down from their highs. Lila felt like she couldn't move and she hummed softly, closing her eyes and just enjoying feeling so weightless. Murphy watched her, panting himself and a small smile on his face, seeing her so content and satisfied. His hand went to her stomach and just rested there. Connor pulled out reluctantly, missing her warmth already. He got up, grabbing a towel that was on the floor from the night before, and he knelt next to her cleaning her up. They never used protection with her, she was on the pill so they didn't feel the need to. They boys got checked regularly since they were somewhat promiscuous. Hell, Connor had even had a brief thing with one of the nurses at the clinic, and Murphy had her a time or two as well when he was drunk.

She just lay there, letting Connor clean between her thighs and her hand from Murphy's mess, and Murphy curled around her once his brother was done. He wrapped his arm around her, kissing the side of her face. Connor joined them then, laying on her other side, hand around her above Murphys as he kissed her cheek. The three of them just lay there, not needing to talk and just enjoying being so close to each other, still feeling the rush from their release. Connor smirked against her hair and Murphy snorted lightly when he heard it; '_Ye weren't wrong brother, she felt like fuckin' heaven.'_


	27. Chapter 27

**I don't even know what to say about this one, it's super short and nothing important happens, it just came to me and I had to fucking write it. I'm sorry lololololololol**

**I'll post an extra one after this just to be kind and make up for it haha.**

Lila and the boys were sat side by side on the couch, a big bowl of popcorn in Lilas lap that was almost empty. They had decided to rent a movie and Murphy had suggested Titanic. Lila shouldn't have been too surprised, especially when Connor wanted a Charles Bronson film, she figured Murphy was just trying to save her from _that_ hell and pick something she might like. She had seen the film a fair few times but it was one of her favourites. She didn't count on it actually being one of the darker twins favourites too though. The scene with the old couple came on and she heard Murphy sniffle beside her. She glanced to him, eyes widening as his eyes were glued to the screen, he was tearing up and she bit her lower lip to stifle a snort as she turned to her left and looked at the other twin. He looked almost bored as he stuffed another handful of popcorn in his mouth. Lila discreetly nudged Connor in the side and he looked at her curiously. She gestured to his brother and he barked out a laugh. So much for being sneaky.

"Are ye fuckin' cryin' _again_? Ye've seen the thing like ten fuckin' times brother!" Connor snorted loudly, taking great pleasure in fucking with him about it. Lila felt bad now for drawing attention to it.

"Fuck you! It's fuckin' sad! They just accept the fact they're gonna die tegether, that's real love that is!" Murphy huffed, scowling at his twin, although it wasn't very scary when he had tears streaming down his face.

"The fuck did ye want te watch it for then if it just makes ye cry like a wee babe?" Connor teased incredulously, making his brother sneer at him. Lila just looked from one to the other, she could feel the impending brotherly ass kicking a mile away.

"It's a good fuckin' movie! Not like yer fuckin' western bullshit ye try te force on us!" Murphy glared, hands flailing around.

"Now hang on a fuckin' minute, ye fuckin' _eejit_, those movies are fuckin' gold and if ye can't appreciate it then ye can just... go and fuck yerself!" Connor yelled, so offended that his twin dare speak ill of his precious westerns.

"They're a pile o' shit and ye know it. At least I'm fuckin' sensitive, lasses love that shit. Just look at Lila, tell me brother, who's she sat closest te? You or me?" Murphy asked shooting him a smug smirk.

Lila blinked a little, looking at him, indeed noticing she was leaning right against him, gravitating towards him since he had been crying whereas his twin had been sat there unaffected. She sat up straighter shooting Connor a sheepish look. Connor squinted at his brother and pursed his lips a little.

"Ye fuckin' little shit! I bet ye planned it all didn't ye? Puttin' on the waterworks just so ye can have her te yerself? Ma would be fuckin' ashamed o' ye!" He huffed, pointing a finger at him. Murphy was about to reply when a knock sounded from the door and all three of them turned to look at it, almost like they had expected the woman herself to be on the other side, ready to come and smack the shit out of them for bickering once again.

Lila slipped off the couch and she could hear the twins start-up arguing again as she made her way to the door. She knew it was all in jest though, this was just par for the course with these two. She opened the door and Rocco beamed a grin at her. She gave him a hug before he came in. He glanced to the twins arguing before the tv and noticing the film.

"Titanic? Again? The fuck you wanna watch that shit for when it just makes you cry?" He asked incredulously as he looked at the darker twin. Connor boomed a laugh at his brother as Murphy sat up shooting his best friend an indignant scowl.

"Fuck the both o' ye!" He huffed before looking at Lila. She was biting her lip trying so hard not to laugh, the whole thing was comical. Even Rocco had apparently seen the boy cry whilst watching it.

"Not you though m'girl, ye didn't take the piss outta me." Murphy smiled sweetly at her, making her feel oh so guilty.

"Is that right?" Connor asked slowly, a sly smirk spreading across his face as he leveled his gaze on the redhead. Her eyes widened as she saw Murphy look at him suspiciously and she shot him a look to say 'shut the fuck up', but he wasn't having any of it.

"What was it ye said this mornin' sweetheart? When I told ye he'd cry like a babe when he watched it? '_I'm not surprised, he cried at a dog shelter commercial the other day'..._" He grinned at her, making her cheeks flush as Rocco barked out a laugh.

Murphy looked at her, his mouth agape, looking so offended and betrayed she almost laughed out loud again.

"Ye fuckin' traitor!" He yelled, standing up and squinting at her as the boys just continued to laugh at him.

"It was a sad fuckin' commercial! All those wee dogs wit' no home, just fuckin' waitin' te be loved...for Christ's sake, now look what ye did...ye set me off again!" He practically screeched as he turned around and wiped his eyes. Connor almost fell off the couch from laughing so hard and Lila shot him a look. It was amusing but Murphy was always so endearing, he was so sensitive, he often reminded her of a young boy, it was too sweet. She walked over to him, standing in front of him and looking up sheepishly.

"It was a sad commercial Murph, I'm not judging you, I love how sensitive you are, I wouldn't change you for the world." She smiled sweetly up at him. It made his face brighten with a beautiful smile and she could practically see his chest puff with pride.

Lila glanced to Connor to see him making a face and mocking her to Rocco and when he caught her eyes he blanched like he'd been caught by his Ma. She just shot him a playful glare. She wrapped her arms around Murphys middle and he squeezed her tight, always loving her hugs. He turned them around a little and Connor squinted at him, so he gave him the finger with a smug smirk over their girl's shoulder, making his twin scoff and Rocco laugh at them.

"I felt that." She mumbled into his neck, causing Connor to laugh at him. She moved away and Murphy shot her an innocent smile which just made her snort at him. These two would be the fucking death of her.

She sat back on the couch and Murphy sat by her side, Connor squinted at him as he wrapped an arm around her, clearly not happy with the earlier turn of events where she was attached to his brother.

"Can we watch _my_ movie now?" He asked petulantly. Lila made a face and Murphy heaved a dramatic sigh.

"What movie did you pick man?" Rocco asked excitedly, he was also a fucking fan of Connors movies, Lila and Murphy, however, not so much. Before Connor could answer though, Murphy beat him to it.

"The Dirty Dozen, it's always The Dirty fuckin' Dozen, did ye even have te ask?" He whined, laying his head on Lilas' shoulder as he laced his fingers with hers.

They watched the movie though, of course they did, Connor had been good enough to watch theirs with minimal complaints on his behalf so it was only fair they returned the favour. The lighter twin watched with rapt interest, even muttering the words every now and again. Lila and Murphy would share amused glances at each other when he did. It was amusing to see him so engrossed in something like this, even if it was one of those fucking movies. Despite the bickering and the playful teasing banter, the four of them lived for this time together. The boys, Lila and Rocco were like their own little weird family. Rocco had always spent a lot of time with the boys, they had adopted him like a weird Italian brother they never knew they wanted, but since Lila came along, they spent even more time together, she got them to do things like eat real meals or watch movies, rather than just sit and get wasted every night. It was nights like this where they just enjoyed each other's company, doing nothing of real import that made them all happy.


	28. Chapter 28

**Someone from the twins past turns up and Lila is less than impressed at her not so saintly boys behavior.**

**Sassy Lila is sassy.**

**Holy fudge nuts, how are we at chapter 28 already? It's hilarious that I originally wanted to make this about 5 chapters, like seriously Sarah, the fuck? When I first got the idea for Lila and the first chapter, as usual, I had no plan for where it was going, I was aiming for something short and sweet. But I had so much inspiration for this and the boys were having way too much fun. **

**Not to toot my own horn, but I'm proud of myself for making it this far. By the time you've read this, it will be completed because I've decided not to post it until it's done. It's no secret I've never finished a fic before, or even been consistent, let's be real loooool. But with the others, I hit a wall, and this one just flowed so easily. I have no idea currently, as I'm writing this, how many chapters this will end up as. I'm just rolling with it. **

**And I've already decided it WILL have a sequel, set during the first movie. I will warn you though, it will be very canon divergent, as is my usual style, and Lila just being with the boys will make things a lot different. I already have things planned out for how I want it to go and there's a big AU element thrown in there that you'll see, it just needs to happen.**

**I'm also on Tumblr if you guys are interested. I post this fic there too and other things, it's a writing blog, mainly BDS things and Daryl Dixon, which is what I started off writing. I'd love for you guys to follow me, come say hi and what not. I'm a smol lonely human and I'd love friends, so come shoot me a message or even send me requests for one-shots to write. ;)**

** blog/crossbows-and-moonshine**

**Ramble over lololol**

Thursday, what a boring fucking day it had been. It had felt slow whilst the twins were at work and before long, she was behind the bar wiping it down after some old drunk dude spilled his drink. The boys and Rocco were perched in their usual seats at the bar, right in the middle so she had to pass them no matter which way she went and they could easily hear all of her conversations, not that they'd tell her that. They were laughing and joking with Rocco as Lila went about her business, and Lila looked over as the door opened. A girl came in, she looked so out of place. She had thick rimmed glasses on with a chunky sweater and jeans. Her hair was dark brown and cut into a very short bob. She looked anxious, meek as her eyes looked around and she went to sit at a booth looking so fucking uncomfortable. Lila tilted her head looking at her for a moment before she heard Rocco behind her.

"Oh shit, its Specs!" He laughed loudly, clapping Connor on the back loudly and making both brothers grimace, especially when Lila slowly turned around, leveling her gaze on her best friend.

"Who's that and why are you calling her that fucking offensive name?" Lila asked with a scowl, words dripping with disdain. Rocco blanched a little, eying the brothers warily and they shifted uncomfortably. There was something they weren't telling her.

They wouldn't meet her eyes and she clenched her jaw, getting annoyed and she squinted at them.

"Who the fuck is she?" She asked harshly. It wasn't that she was jealous or anything, it was the name Rocco had used, there was something off about the way the boys were acting and it was like her sixth sense was tingling that she wouldn't fucking like it. With the boys choosing to ignore her, she settled her eyes on Rocco and he shrunk back. She knew he would crack first, he always did. He had issues with keeping his mouth shut under pressure.

"Rocco you better tell me what the fuck is going on right now, or so help me God." She scowled, making the three boys look at her like naughty school children.

"Aw fuck...uh...these two kinda fucked her around a bit for a bet." He winced, knowing how bad it sounded, especially when he was telling a woman this, their girlfriend to be exact. Lilas' eyes widened, turning her glare to the boys and they both lowered their heads, having the decency to look ashamed. They had changed since then, they weren't proud out a lot of shit they had done, especially when drunk and goaded by stupid things like bets.

"You wanna tell me or should I go ask her?" She asked with a quirked brow, her mouth in a tight line. They both looked to her worried and shook their heads, if the girl told her then they would sound like even bigger assholes, mainly because she would tell her the truth from her end of it. The fear crept in and took a vice-like grip of Murphy and he couldn't hold back the words.

"Fuckin' hell m'girl, we were stupid alright? This one guy who used te come here, he made us a bet that we both couldn't bed her, so o' course we took the challenge, we were already piss drunk." Murphy started, his face heating up a little at having to recount this horrible tale to his girlfriend.

"She's a meek lil thing, a bookworm. She was shy as hell but we… we mighta got her a wee bit drunk and she seemed te like the attention we gave her. So… we brought her back te ours, both had our fun. But Murph, he had her first, turns out she was a fuckin' virgin, but I fuckin' swear it on me life Lila, we didn't fuckin' force her inte it!" Connor stated firmly, not wanting that thought in her head. She knew they wouldn't have though, despite the fact they were still assholes in this story. She listened intently, her eyes steady as she looked at the pair.

"When she woke the next day, hungover te hell, she was all sweet like, like she thought it meant somethin' it didn't mean...and we mighta told her we'd call her, and we never. And then…" Murphy sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, he could practically see the steam coming from Lilas' ears.

"She fuckin' came back here, tried talkin' te us, and we were drunk once again. She wasn't gettin' the hint we weren't interested so… we had some fun with some other lasses, just makin' out and shit, kinda...rubbin' it in her face. She saw us, got all upset, cryin' and all sorts o' shit before she ran outta here." Connor finished, swigging his beer like he needed the fucking liquid courage.

Lila wasn't stupid, she knew these men were more boys half the time and she knew they had a very interesting history with women. But to hear how they treated the poor girl, a girl who was clearly not used to having that kind of attention, to have them fucking take her V card off her and act that way, it made her blood boil. Her own first time had been a hot mess and it only dragged that up for her and it was painful. She tugged her lower lip with her teeth and she inhaled deeply, trying to calm down as she glared at them.

"You're paying for her drinks, all night." She scowled harshly, walking away to pour a shot. They watched with mortified eyes as Lila took the shot and walked over to the girl who was sat there fidgeting in her seat since she had noticed the twins there. Lila noticed her grabbing her bag and she huffed, like fuck she was letting her run from these assholes.

She set the shot down on the table, making the girl jump and look up at her with her wide brown eyes. Lila gave her a small smile.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. Just wanted to welcome you to McGintys, or welcome you back I guess." She sighed, glancing at the twins who were still watching horrified. They were scared of what the girl might say, they already worried Lila thought of them differently now despite the fact they had truly changed. The girl looked at them, wondering why they looked so scared before looking back at Lila. She gave her a weak smile and nodded. Lila knew it wasn't really her place, but she couldn't keep the words under wraps, she was mad as all hell.

"You're leaving?" She asked her, looking almost stern and it made the girl look worried.

"Well...I uh...I don't think I'm welcome in here...I should." She rambled nervously, looking like a scared animal.

"Fuck that! Fuck them!" She yelled, shocking herself at how loud she was as she pointed to her contrite boyfriends who were watching with wide eyes, clearly hearing her.

"You don't have to run away, not again, just because _they're_ here." She said firmly, making the girl swallow hard and look at her like she was in awe. Lila sat in front of her in the booth and leveled her gaze in the girl.

"What they did, it wasn't right for them to do that, fuck, it isn't right for anyone to do that to you. They fucked you over, but you know what, that's their loss. You're a beautiful young girl and you deserve to be treated like a fucking queen, not with those drunken fucking hooligans." She stated, glaring over to them. They were both still listening and watching in horror, even Rocco, they were sure she fucking hated them now. Yet they couldn't help but be a little proud of how she was talking to this girl, helping her and building her up.

The girl looked at her almost in wonder of the strong redhead in front of her, giving her a smile. Lila beamed a grin at her, making the girls own smile widen since it was so infectious.

"So, you're staying, as my fucking special guest, you'll sit over at the bar away from those fuck heads. They're paying for your drinks all night too." Lila smirked at her, making her laugh lightly. It was nice to hear the meek girl laugh and see her more relaxed. The girl couldn't help but wonder who Lila was, how she commanded the whole room, how she seemed to have the boys scared shitless and look actually sorry.

"Are you…?" She asked hesitantly, glancing from the boys to her. The boys half expected her to say no, because she was fucking done with them.

"The unfortunate girl who has to deal with their shit? Yeah, I am." Lila snorted slightly amused, she was mad at them but she wasn't stupid enough not to notice they had changed. It didn't mean she wasn't going to give them hell for it though. She felt a sort of kinship with the girl since they both had horrible first times, maybe she would tell her about it sometime to make her feel better. The girl nodded, not being able to hide her shock that the girl was clearly in an actual relationship with the boys, and it looked serious by the boys' faces. She felt slightly smug that they were actually worried, almost like she had the upper hand, all thanks to this amazing girl.

"I'm Emily." She said softly, giving Lila a smile.

"I'm Lila, come on." Lila grinned, taking her hand and leading her over to the bar. The girl took her shot with her and downed it as she sat down at the end of the bar. Lila went behind the bar, leaning on her hands as she looked at her.

"What would you like to drink Emily, since these fine young assholes are paying? I'd be more than happy to get the champagne out for you." She smirked wickedly. The boys started to protest, like they had hundreds of dollars to spend on fucking champagne for a girl they fucked over last year, but Lila looked over her shoulder at them, shutting them up instantly as they shrunk back from her like they were being told off by their Ma. The girl had to cover her mouth, to stop herself from laughing at the sight.

"Um… Maybe some red wine?" She sounded so unsure of herself and Lila wasn't sure if it was because she wasn't used to drinking or because the boys were watching her. She knew how humiliating it was and it's why she kept tearing into the boys in front of her, so she knew that what they did wasn't okay and even their own girlfriend thought so.

Lila shot her a grin as she took a step back.

"Our most expensive red wine coming right up, I hear it's really fucking good." She laughed, moving past the boys who were watching her warily as she grabbed a $50 bottle of red wine. Their faces fell and Rocco snickered, silencing when the twins shot him a look. Lila poured a large glass for her and set the bottle down next to her too. Some of the other patrons at the bar were watching amused. Some of them had even witnessed what had happened with the boys and the meek girl and it was amusing to see them so mortified and Lila putting them in their place. They never thought they'd see the day.

"Enjoy, if you need anything, just holler." Lila smiled warmly, making the girl smile brightly up at her. Lila walked away to serve some other people and Murphy was fidgeting in his seat.

"Lila, love, can we have another beer...please?" He sounded so hesitant that she fought not to laugh, he sounded like a scolded child, he fucking looked like one too when she stopped in front of him.

"I can piss in a glass if you want and you can have that." She sassed, quirking her a brow as she gave him a sweet smile.

Rocco's beer he was still nursing came out of his fucking nose at her comment as the bar erupted in laughter. He started choking, laughing and trying to catch his breath as his nostrils burnt like a mother fucker. Connor covered his mouth, stifling his own laughter at hearing such a crazy thing coming out of his pretty girl's mouth. It was so unexpected and sassy, and he knew she'd kill him if he laughed because she was pissed to hell with them. Murphy looked at her with wide eyes, his jaw slack as he tried to fucking fathom those words in his brain. It was something _**he'd**_ fucking come out with to his own brother, he never expected Lila to say such a thing. His mouth moved yet no words came out as she looked at him, not laughing like every other person in the bar, even Emily had to laugh at what she said. Lila was just squinting at him with a slight smirk.

"I...uh...I mean... if ye wanna piss in a glass then go for it...cannae promise I'll fuckin' drink it though." He retorted almost warily, still in shock and dumbfounded. His comment earned another round of laughter and Connor couldn't even hold it back anymore at his brother's ridiculous comment. Lilas' nostrils flared as she tried not to laugh, biting her lip as she looked at him amused. His shell shocked face was the best thing she'd ever seen. She wished Murphy had his camera so she could take a fucking picture, blow it up and frame it in the loft.

Her face made him relax a little, seeing her amused, he and Connor untensed a little knowing she obviously didn't hate them, but she was mad. They'd probably get a good ear bashing when they got home. She shook her head and snorted a little, going to grab three beers and place them in front of them. Connor reached out, actually fucking reached out to her for once and took her hand. She blinked at him a little as he settled his questioning gaze on her. She sighed, nodding to him to answer his unasked question of if they were okay. He nodded back feeling relieved and let her go so she could go back to working the bar. With the boys slightly more relaxed, they laughed and joked with Rocco again. Emily sat reading at the end of the bar slurping her wine happily, feeling better. The boys wouldn't look at her though, they were far too ashamed to do that. Lila walked over to her when she had a minute, noticing the book in her hands.

"What are you reading?" She asked excitedly. Emily looked shocked that the girl liked to read, seemingly as much as she did. She sat up straighter, a wide grin on her face.

"To Kill A Mockingbird." She replied, still grinning as she held up the book to Lila so she could see the cover,

"Oh shit! I love that one!" Lila beamed down at her. Emily ducked her head feeling almost shy, she felt like maybe they were becoming friends and she felt awkward all of a sudden.

"It's one of my favorites." Emily smiled, sipping her wine to help her relax.

"I think you and I are gonna be good friends!" Lila snorted, she could just feel it in her bones, despite how awkward it may be for the boys.

"I've never had a friend before." Emily blurted out, eyes widening at how the wine had loosened her lips a little too much. Lila just gave her a warm smile, not embarrassing her with stupid comments.

"Well, now you do." Lila smiled. Emily licked her lower lip, glancing to the boys who kept looking over, they were talking amongst themselves but they were still listening in to the girls' conversation.

"Won't that be awkward, won't they be upset or something?" She whispered, like she knew they were listening. Lila laughed loudly and shook her head.

"Fuck those assholes. Well not literally, since you've been there and all and it was a disaster. But I want a friend and I like you, so it's happening whether they like it or not." Lila snorted at her, making the girl laugh herself. She nodded, sipping some more of her wine.

"Okay, I'd really like that. Sorry if I seem a little...awkward. I'm not used to people. Friends or even like...boys." She said softly, her cheeks flushing. The wine really wasn't agreeing with her mouth today she noticed. Lila grinned, suddenly getting an idea.

"You know what, I'm gonna talk to Aileen, get the day off tomorrow, and I'm taking you clubbing. It's been years since I've been clubbing with a girl and I have no idea what the scene is like here." She smirked, making Emily's eyes widen a little. She hadn't been to a club ever and Lila seemed aware of that. The boys frowned, sitting up tense at the thought of Lila, in skimpy ass clothing and dancing with fucking men.

"Will...will they be going?" She asked quietly, nodding to the boys. She didn't ask too quiet though as they heard her.

"O' course we're fuckin' goin'!" They both yelled offended in unison. Lila glanced to them, an amused smirk playing at her lips.

"Alright, calm down _wonder_ _twins_, you can come." She snorted, making them both squint at her as Rocco barked a laugh. She looked back to Emily now who shifted uncomfortably.

"Don't worry, I'll make them behave, and we're gonna get you loosened up and re-acquainted with the opposite sex...or the same sex...if you're into that." She grinned wickedly. The boys' eyes widened as they glanced from one girl to the other and Rocco almost fell off his chair. Emily's face flushed bright red and she snorted.

"Oh...I'm not...I'm not into…" She was flustered and Lila fought a grin.

"Hey, no judgement here, I've experimented myself, all I'm saying is, don't rule it out." She smirked as she walked away.

The boys' jaws were on the floor with that news and she laughed at their faces as she stopped in front of them.

"Ye've been with another girl?" Murphy asked sounding so in awe of such a thing and she knew he was imagining it in his head. It made her laugh louder. Rocco looked at her like she was a rare unicorn he had just stumbled across drinking from a lake made of rainbows and gold. And Connor, fucking Connor was pinning her with a smirk and an intense gaze and she didn't have to think to know he too was imagining it, wanting fucking details no doubt.

"Yep." She smirked, offering no more info up.

"Aw c'mon now lass, at least give us somethin' juicy te think about!" Connor practically whined, sounding offended at her unwillingness to share the information. Emily watched the interaction with a grin as she drank her wine. A wicked smirk spread across Lilas' face as she looked from one boy to another.

"I will...If you all apologise to Emily." She stated firmly, a grin on her face as she shrugged casually. She glanced to the brown haired girl who looked at her wide-eyed, biting her lip to stop herself from laughing at how the redhead had these boys wrapped around her finger. Rocco barked laugh but stopped abruptly when Lila glared at him.

"You too funny man, don't think I don't know you're the one who made that bet, it has Rocco written all over it." She squinted, making him tense and shrink back a little. He had no idea how the fuck she knew that but the looks the brothers shot his way confirmed her line of thought.

"Your choice, I can tell you..._in_ _detail_...what happened with me and a pretty blonde _lass_, or you'll have to wonder about it and let it eat you alive." She smirked at them. The boys all looked to each other, they knew they should fucking apologise anyway since what they did was so shitty, but they had just struggled with their pride to do so. But they wanted to show Lila they had changed, that and they really wanted those fucking details. They went to open their mouths but Lila raised her hand to silence them. They looked up at her like naughty school children.

"Properly, I know you asshats have changed and I'd like you to show my new friend that you're not the same dicks from before and that you're proper gentlemen now." She said firmly, giving them a pointed look. They couldn't help the pride that swelled in their chest at the fact she had acknowledged they had changed and she called them perfect gentlemen. The twins looked to one another before standing in unison, Rocco following behind. They walked around to where Emily was sat and she gave Lila a shocked look like she didn't know to do with herself, Lila just gave her a reassuring smile.

"We're really sorry Emily for what we did." Murphy started, glancing at her through his lashes feeling ashamed of himself.

"Ye didn't deserve what we did te ye, and we offer our sincerest o' apologies te ye." Connor finished, making Lila smile to herself, she loved it when they finished each other's sentences off. The boys took her hands on their own, placing a very brief kiss to it before letting them go.

"Yeah, sorry for bein' assholes." Rocco chimed in, awkwardly patting her back, Lila snorted to herself. They looked her apologetically waiting for her to either forgive them or smack them, they weren't quite sure which way she would go.

The girl was shocked, and she stifled a laugh as she looked to Lila thankfully, to finally get an apology for what they had done. Lila smirked at her and gave her a nod.

"It's okay." Emily replied softly, not wanting to offer anything more because despite the fact they had changed, she still felt awkward around them. They nodded gratefully before returning to their seats. They looked up at Lila hopefully and she laughed loudly. An hour later found the four of them in a booth, Lila facing all three boys, she had asked Emily if she wanted to join them but she had politely declined, she'd had enough of the MacManus twins for the night. Lila sat leaning back with her arms folded over her chest, smirking slightly at the boys' faces. She had just told them the story of a blonde girl named Cassie she met in New York in a club. Lila was drunk, she wanted to experiment, and experiment she fucking did. The night ended with her at Cassie's getting eaten out by the pretty girl and returning the favour. The boys' jaws were on the floor, eyes wide as they looked at her in shock. Their eyes glazed over a little like they were in a faraway place, New York no doubt, two years prior to this date where they were a fly on the wall for the whole encounter. Lila was more than amused at the whole situation.

"So...are ye...bisexual then?" Murphy asked curiously after what felt like forever of silence. Lila snorted a little as each of them leant forward on the table, acting so fucking interested in the answer, even Rocco.

"I mean...I guess? I can look at a girl and know she's attractive. That's the only time I've been with a girl though and honestly, I much prefer the male anatomy." She gave them a wicked smirk, eyeing up the brothers in a way that made their jeans tighten a little. Out the corner of her eye, she noticed Emily getting ready to leave and she sighed, looking back to the brothers with amusement gone from her face.

"I don't want her walking home alone this late, especially since she's had a drink." She stated seriously with a furrowed brow. The boys glanced to the other girl, understanding why Lila was worried.

"I'll walk her home." Rocco offered, making Lila and the boys look to him a little shocked.

"Are you sure you wanna walk 'Specs' home Roc?" Lila asked with a pointed glare, letting them all know she hadn't fucking forgotten about it all. Rocco's face fell and he looked ashamed of himself once again.

"Fuck Lila...I'm sorry...You know how I am...I'm an asshole." He sighed. Lila frowned a little, standing and leaning over, taking the lovable cave mans face in her hands. The twins quirked a brow as they watched on carefully, it was a little to close for their liking.

"You're not an asshole Roc, you're one of the best men I know. You have a heart of gold in there." She smiled, making him blush slightly and duck his head. She gave him a quick kiss to the forehead and moved to sit back down. The twins smirked to themselves as they looked at how quiet their hairy friend had gotten. It warmed their hearts hearing Lilas affectionate words to their best friend, they knew she was right.

"But… if I find out you were an ass to her, I'll gut you like fish and hang you with your own insides." Her sweet innocent smile contradicted her words and Rocco's eyes widened so much the twins thought they might fall out of his head. They both snorted, sipping their beers. Their girl could be downright scary when she wanted to be.

Lila stood, walking over to Emily, the girl smiled at her and squeaked when Lila suddenly pulled her in for a hug. When she moved away they smiled at each other.

"Rocco's gonna walk you home so you get there safe. He'll let me know your address and I'll come by tomorrow? At like 6? We can get ready together." Lila smiled at her, not wanting her to back out. Emily nodded with a smile, grateful too that she wouldn't be walking home alone and that Lila cared enough to arrange a chaperone.

"Alright, thanks Lila." She smiled warmly. Lila squeezed her hand before getting back to the boys. It was time to close anyway. She watched as Rocco and Emily left and then looked to her two handsome devils.

"Alright then, are we ready to head home?" Lila grinned. They smiled at her, standing up and both kissing her cheeks.

"Aye." They smiled in unison.


	29. Chapter 29

**This one kind of started off feeling like a filler chapter and went off on its own tangent loooool.**

**Clubbing, bonding, and some cheeky MacManus PDA. Although this time I should call it PDC since it's more claiming her out of possessiveness then affection. ;')**

The next day, Lila was thrumming with excitement about going to a club. Back in New York, before she became a carer to her granda, she often went clubbing, even underage, and she loved it. The nightlife there had been insane and she always got such a buzz off it. The night before, after the trio had gotten home from the pub, they had a slight argument when Lila informed the twins she was going to be meeting Emily at her place, alone. The boys wouldn't hear of it, having her going on her own and them both go to the club, meeting the boys there later. But Lila put her foot down. She wanted the chance to get ready with Emily in peace, getting to know her more. And since the boys had work, she picked a time just before they would be home to leave so they couldn't stop her. She wanted to get to the club before them, have a few drinks just the girls and get Emily relaxed so she felt more at ease around the boys. The boys were pissed, but they knew she would be leaving before they got home from work no matter what they said so they had nothing to do but accept it.

She was currently at Emily's house as the girls got ready. Lila had gotten herself ready first and she brought a whole load of clothes with her for Emily to pick from, knowing the girl wouldn't have anything Lila deemed club appropriate. Lila was wearing the same black bralette from the boys birthday, but she had paired it with a tartan mini skirt instead of jeans. The skirt was high waisted, cinching in her already tiny waist. It fell to her thighs, just long enough to cover her ass. She knew she had crossed the vampy line and into slutty just about but it was more acceptable in a club with the low lighting. It was a skater style skirt, so it flared out and she had on her black wedges from the boy's birthday too. She had her hair half up, two small messy space buns either side of her head as all the other hair fell to her waist, wavy as usual. She did a smokey eye with winged liner and her usual vampy matte red, almost black lipstick. She wore a large choker with it that had a big hoop attached, like a leash should attach to it, it was one of her favourites. Her friend had complimented her profusely, telling her how amazing she looked and how she wished she could pull something like that off. Lilas mission was to make Emily see herself for the beautiful woman she was.

Emily had told her she didn't feel comfortable in a dress or skirt, not this time at least, so Lila picked her high waisted skinny black jeans. She opted for a simple top for the girl, a dark grey cami with lace trim, tucking it in the pants for the girl and showing off her figure. She wasn't as curvy as Lila, Lila had an hourglass figure with a tiny waist. Emily was a little more skinny, but it looked good on her. She finished the outfit with some ankle boots, making her look more womanly, but nowhere near as exposed as Lila, baby steps as it were. Lila did the girls make up for her, and with the look Emily had given the makeup, Lila doubted the girl was used to it. So she opted to keep it simple, unlike her own dramatic makeup. She gave the girl a simple brown smokey eye with some eyeliner and finished the look with some nude gloss. They both looked hot as hell, but at the same time their outfits showed their personality. Emily being more reserved and Lila being edgy and honestly unashamed to show her body. She never had been when she was clubbing, she knew what the scene was like after all.

They linked arms as they got out of the cab, walking inside the club. It wasn't too far from the pub which is why Lila knew it was there, seeing it on her way to work. She had no clue about the clubs here in Boston so this seemed like a good place to scout. If they didn't like it, she could find somewhere else to go for next time. Emily was actually excited after Lila had pumped her up whilst they got ready, Lilas excitement was contagious. Emily admired the redhead, she seemed so confident and did not give a shit about what other people thought, Emily wished she could be more like that and hoped spending time with her might help.

As they made their way in, Lila grinned, looking around and feeling like home. The atmosphere was worlds apart from McGinty's. The light was low, the occasional strobe going off, a sea of bodies on the dancefloor gyrating against each other to the slow beat of the music, giving the song a sexy feel to it. Lila gripped Emily's hand so she didn't lose the girl as she made her way to the bar. She knew she only had about an hour with the girl before the boys showed up and she knew without a doubt they would get ready as soon as possible to get to her, wanting to know she was okay and made it here safely. Half an hour in and the girls weren't drunk but they were tipsy, they were sat in some chairs in a corner where Lila was telling her new friend about her horrible first time, losing her virginity at 16 years old to a guy in her class.

"I wasn't the prettiest in school you know? I wasn't popular or anything like that. I didn't really get on with people that well, I was still dealing with losing my da, and I was a pretty angsty teen. I was a loner, people just kinda avoided me. So when he started showing me all this attention, I guess I felt special. Like the cool kid noticed I existed." She sighed. Emily nodded intently, she was engrossed in the story, enjoying having a friend. Lila was grateful for the girl. As much as she loved her boys and Rocco, she seemed to be always surrounded by men, even at work. She was glad to have some good old girl talk.

"He would shower me with gifts, be all cute and leave sweet notes in my locker. At one point he even told me he loved me." She scoffed bitterly and shook her head. Emily frowned and reached out, squeezing her hand. If she was honest the story felt so similar to her own already and she related to it.

"I was nervous, obviously, I hadn't ever done it before and I told him that. He told me he'd be gentle, told me I was it for him. I believed him like a fucking idiot. So I gave him what he wanted, and then right after, not even five minutes, he tells me to leave...I was so shocked, I was hurt. He was suddenly cold. He laughed at me when I cried and told me I meant nothing, I was just a conquest he could brag about, so I left feeling humiliated and heartbroken. Sure enough, when I get to school the next day, everyone's whispering about me, he'd told everyone and there were rumours flying around about how much of a slut I was, some even that I'd fucked the whole football team." She huffed, taking a long pull from her beer. Emily scowled, sipping her own beer.

"He's an asshole." She frowned, making Lila snort a laugh at her, she liked Emily a lot. The girl had already warmed up to her pretty well and she was a different person to the meek girl she met the day before. Lila was happy she was opening up to her.

"Yeah, he is. But it doesn't matter, I made my peace with it and I'm still alive, shit just happens you know?" She shrugged, and of course, Emily knew, Lilas own boyfriends had done it to her. The whole thing was strange, to be friends with the girlfriend of the very boys who had hurt her, but it wasn't awkward like it should have been, she genuinely liked Lila and she liked how even though she loved the boys, she had stuck up for her and made them say sorry to her.

They had a few more drinks, still not drunk but well on their way, and that's when the twins and Rocco showed up. They pushed their way through the sea of bodies, scanning the crowd for their girl. They had been to clubs a few times, they liked the energy here sometimes but they much preferred the relaxed atmosphere of the bar. Rocco was the first to spot her with Emily, pointing her out to the boys as he shouted something they couldn't hear over the loud music. Their eyes went to where he was pointing and they almost stopped dead in their tracks. She was wearing such a tiny fucking skirt and they didn't fail to notice all the eyes on her. They felt mixed emotions. First of all, they wanted to remove all the leering eyes from the skulls that dared look at their girl. But at the same time, they felt that swell of pride that she belonged to them. She was breathtaking, and as she turned and saw them, a beautiful bright smile gracing her pouty dark red lips, their breath caught in their throat. She was a vision, like a dark angel calling them home. It made their hormones go fucking nuts but it also caused a swirl of emotions in both brothers. And Murphy being Murphy, couldn't hold back.

He stalked right over, his possessive need to claim her in front of all the watching eyes reaching an all-time high, and much how he had done in McGinty's, he grabbed her face and crashed his lips on hers. He could taste the alcohol on her lips and he felt her moan into the kiss as she fisted his hair, not caring who looked on. It wasn't like there weren't other people making out all over the place. His tongue invaded her mouth, like it was exploring every inch of it and he got lost in the taste of her. When he moved away she gave him a grin, clearly tipsy but also feeling the rush of the kiss. Lila had noticed the boys were wearing their usual black t-shirt and jeans combo, she had a brief fleeting thought of how unfair it was that they could make such little effort yet look so sinfully good.

His hands were still on her face as he took a small step back, his eyes roaming her beautiful body up close and he hummed in appreciation. Leaning forward again and resting his forehead on hers.

"Fuckin' hell m'girl, yer tryin' te kill us." He chuckled, making her snort a laugh at him. Her cheeks were slightly flushed from the alcohol and she looked well on her way to being merry. He kissed her nose before moving away and she noticed the lighter haired twin watching them, biting his lower lip as he gave her a hooded gaze, his eyes traveling all over her body. She flushed under his stare but made no move to go to him. He always expected her to and the alcohol singing in her veins made her feel cheeky. He looked at her almost expectantly and she quirked a brow with a smirk, shrugging at him. She heard Murphy laugh beside her, watching the two as he gave his brother a smug grin. In any other circumstance Connor would have stuck to his will, being the one in control and waiting until the girl caved and went to him, but he had the deep need to claim her as his twin had, he'd seen at the men with their tongues practically hanging out as they looked at his girl. He growled low in his throat as he closed the gap, grabbing her hip with one hand, the other on her neck. She was more than surprised when his lips attacked hers with as much desperation as his brother. Connors kisses were usually more controlled and slow, yet still sensual. This was different, and she knew he was laying his claim, honestly, it turned her on.

When he moved away, they were both breathless and she smirked at him, licking her lower lip as she looked up at him through her lashes.

"Hi." She grinned, looking so happy she was practically radiant, he couldn't help but smile down at her.

"Hi." He replied with a cheeky grin. She just kept looking up at him with a lovesick smile, making moon eyes at him and he loved it. She heard Murphy laugh again next to her, she was definitely on her way to being drunk and it was adorable. Connor pointed over to the table, where Emily was now sat with Rocco, and Connor smacked her ass lightly, commanding her to go and sit down. She glanced at both boys for a second before complying. Murphy rubbed his lower lip, Connor scratching the scruff on his chin, as they both tilted their heads, watching her walk away. The way her hips swayed, the little amount of clothing she was wearing, she was a fucking vision. They noticed a guy at the bar also watching her walk away and they squinted at him, but when the man noticed them he blanched, looking terrified, he had seen their public display of affection as it were, and he turned away quickly. The twins just shot each other sly smirks feeling more than pleased with themselves, they made their way over to the bar to order them all a round of drinks.

When Lila got to the table, a smirk worked its way onto her face as she saw Emily and Rocco talking intently. It only widened when she saw Emily laugh at something Rocco said, he was the funny man after all. It seemed like they were getting cozy, and it made her feel all warm and fuzzy. They'd make a cute couple. She wouldn't say anything to embarrass them though, she knew how Emily was and she wasn't about to make her new friend feel awkward, that's not what friends do. So instead, she sat at the table and smiled warmly at them as they looked at her, smiling back. She'd made sure to sit a bit away from them so she wasn't imposing and she was more than pleased when they resumed talking. She was glad she'd had the chance to ply Emily with some booze before the boys got here because it seemed to have loosened her up. She also had a feeling it was to do with the fact that she and Emily now felt like real friends, and Emily knew Lila had her back, it made her much more relaxed about being around the three assholes that once hurt her. They had changed after all, and Emily could see it.

The boys got back to the table and she was surprised when Connor sat next to her and Murphy sat opposite her. Connor rarely went to her like this and the scowl on Murphys face told her the needy twin wasn't impressed with this turn of events. Connors' arm wound around her waist and she reached across the table, holding her hand out to the darker twin. He turned his scowl from his brother, softening when he looked at her but he still wasn't happy. She bat her lashes at him, giving him a little pout and he couldn't help but smile as he took her hand, feeling good that she had wanted to include him and hadn't just forgotten him, even when drunk.

The brothers kept talking to each other in a language she couldn't understand but she was too drunk to care, enjoying the warmth radiating from Connor and how Murphy was stroking her hand affectionately. She was getting the itch to dance, watching all the bodies on the floor moving to the beat. She was distracted though when she felt Connor laugh next to her and she glanced to Murphy, he was watching Emily and Rocco amused and he was about to say something, but it was like Lila just fucking knew, always in tune with them. She kicked him under the table and he yelped, his shin took quite a hit with those monster heels of hers. Connor barked a laugh next to her, fucking delighted about the fact she had actually kicked his brother, and Murphy scowled at her indigently.

"The fuck was that for?" He asked petulantly, his voice higher than usual and she couldn't stop the snort that left her lips.

"Not a word Murphy MacManus!" She scolded, glancing to her new friend and her best friend really getting along. Realisation crossed his face then as he glanced from them to Lila again. As much as he wanted to make a smart ass comment, he knew Lila would have his balls if he did, this was her night after all and they had just fucking encroached it without care since they wouldn't even dream of letting her out the house dressed like this without them.

Some time passed with them laughing and drinking, Emily and Rocco now sat with them properly again as they joined in and Lila was having a great night. It was nice to be back in a club and now with her new favourite people too. But still, she was getting the urge to dance again. She was going to ask the twins to dance, although she felt like dancing wasn't really their thing, but then she got an idea.

"Emily, come dance with me!" Lila pleaded, giving her friend a grin. The twins and Rocco quirked a brow, looking somewhat amused as they look from girl to girl, like they were excited about her answer and to see them dance together. Lila snorted. She had no doubt the whole experimentation story she had told the three was playing on their minds and it was hilarious. Emily looked at her with wide eyes, blushing just slightly. Lila knew she'd enjoy it if she gave it a go, so she stood up, sauntering over somehow gracefully despite all the alcohol in her system. She took Emily's hand and pulled her to the dance floor.

"Lila...I've never...I don't know how to." Emily admitted looking embarrassed and sheepish. Lila thought as much and shot her friend a winning smile.

"Just do what I do, let your body respond to the beat." She smirked as she started swaying her body to the deep slow base of the song. She always felt alive being in a club, letting the music sing through her veins like this, her body always seemed to have a mind of its own and just moved accordingly. Emily watched her for a moment taking note of what her more confident friend was doing. She was excited to try it, this whole thing had been a new experience for her and Lila hadn't steered her wrong yet. She copied Lila, her movements a little jerky at first, unsure of herself. Lila moved closer to her, wrapping her arms around her neck with a wicked grin, and Emily laughed lightly, her cheeks blushing. It did help though, as she rested her on hands on Lilas' hips, it helped her move in sync with the redhead as they both danced together. Emily's face heated up when she noticed a lot of people looking their way, smirking at them, seemingly enjoying the show. But it felt good to be noticed that way, after spending so much time a fly on the wall.

The boys and Rocco were staring at them, eyes wide and jaws slack. When they saw Lila move closer to the girl and wrap her arms around her neck, they almost fucking died of a heart attack right there. The way she moved was so erotic, how her hips swayed and her body moved so sinuously, they felt their jeans suddenly feel a fuck tonne tighter. Their eyes weren't really on the other girl, although just the fact that Lila was dancing with another lass got them hot and bothered. But it was just the way Lila moved her body altogether that got them going. Especially when she was wearing that short fucking skirt. They tensed visibly through when some prick came up behind Lila, just inviting himself in on the party. Murphy's blood turned to molten lava when said pricks hands rested on Lilas' hips just below Emily's and he was gyrating behind her, no doubt rubbing his dick all over her ass. They looked to each other, faces like thunder, and Rocco looked at them both and swallowed thickly, knowing what was about to happen.

Before they could get up to kick the assholes teeth in though, Lila had turned around, moving away from him. The guy was handsome, she'd give him that. Usually she'd dance with anyone, she didn't really care, but she was in a relationship now. She glanced to the boys, seeing them watching and looking like they were about to shit a brick and she had to hold back her laughter. She was really tempted just to dance with the guy, to see their faces and because honestly, when they were jealous and possessive, it was really fucking sexy. But she knew the guy would end up dead if she did, and she didn't want to hurt the boys. It was one thing making them jealous when they weren't together or just saying something to get them riled up, but to do this would be crossing a line she didn't want to cross. Their relationship was already one that would be considered strange and needed more attention. Polyamorous relationships needed more communication than others and it was a big deal to keep jealousy at a minimum. And even though this wouldn't cause them fighting with each other, she didn't want to make them mad, because if they pulled that shit on her now they were together, she'd fucking kill them.

"I'm sorry, I'm taken." Lila grinned warmly at the man, he hadn't really done anything wrong after all, no need to be rude to him. He held his hands up in mock surrender as he laughed lightly and Lila was glad he was taking it so well and didn't cause a scene.

"Hey, no worries. What about you?" He asked with a smile as he glanced at Emily. The girl's eyes widened like saucers and Lilas laughter chimed around them. She pulled her friend in for a hug so she could talk to her privately.

"You don't have to if you don't want, but I think you'd enjoy it if you did." She whispered to her, letting her know she had her back, but really wanting her friend to just loosen up and have a good time. She knew Emily seemed to like Rocco, and it seemed like just maybe Rocco liked her back, but if she danced with this guy and Rocco got jealous, Lila would have that answer. Emily looked at her, then to the guy, before back at her. If she was honest, she was really tempted to. She had enjoyed dancing with Lila and now this hot guy wanted to dance with her. It was just a dance, it wasn't serious, and she knew Lila would have her back if things got too awkward. She nodded shyly and the man grinned at her. Lila walked away as the two started dancing, she would go and sit down with the boys and watch to make sure she was okay and didn't need help.

The boys relaxed when they saw Lila move away and the prick was no longer touching her, but they still watched on with scowls as she continued to talk to him, fucking smiling at him as he smiled back. But when the man started to dance with Emily instead and Lila walked away, they exhaled a breath they didn't even realise they were holding. Rocco was the one who was now scowling as he watched the pair dance and the boys glanced to each other with smirks, trying not to laugh. Lila joined them with a beaming grin, but before she could sit down, Murphy grabbed her and pulled her to sit sideways on his lap. She giggled, wrapping an arm around him so she didn't just fall right off, she was pretty tipsy and she didn't trust herself not to slide off and hit the floor.

She heard Murphy's beautiful laugh in her ear and she glanced over to Connor who was grinning at her, thoroughly amused. Murphy nuzzled her neck, nipping it playfully and making her gasp.

"Ye been a wee naughty lass Lila." He purred against her skin and she flushed from his words and squirmed a little on his lap, his arms around her waist tightening. Connor was still staring her down and it was intense, a sly smirk on his face as he watched them both.

"I told him I was taken." She whispered, her heart beating faster still from Murphy's words. Her voice sounded shy almost as she clung to him. The twins certainly knew how to push her buttons. Murphy hummed against her neck, seemingly pleased with that news and Connors smirk widened.

"Good girl." Murphy smirked, nipping her neck once again and making her let out a quiet moan, all other people in the club seemingly forgotten and it was just her and her boys.

Murphy suddenly latched his teeth onto the skin of her neck, sucking hard and marking her up for him and his brother. He remembered the first time he had seen her with her hair up, how he had wanted to do this even back then and he felt a surge of primal satisfaction from it. That he was finally able to do it. Murphy's hand started sliding up the inside of her thigh and she moaned again, squirming more as her chest heaved. Connor watched with rapt attention, eyes wandering the whole of her as he took her all in. How her cheeks were flushed and her eyes closed, definitely fucking enjoying the attention his twin was showing her.

When Murphy was done, he made a noise of satisfaction in the back of his throat as he admired his handiwork, a large hickey standing out in stark contrast to her beautiful pale skin. She looked at him, blinking slowly like she was dazed and he gave her a devilish grin, loving how she responded to him. He pulled her lips to his own, kissing her deeply as he massaged his tongue with hers, making her moan into his mouth. He fisted her hair, his kiss getting more intense and desperate. She whined when he eventually pulled away feeling breathless. He chuckled at her as he tried to catch his own breath. She was fucking perfect in every way. He loved how her body reacted to his touches, or how she never seemed to care who was watching when she was with them both. It made him feel good.

"Go te me brother _cailín álainn_ (beautiful girl)." He commanded, brushing his lips against hers teasingly. His tone and words sent another thrill through her and she swallowed hard, nodding as she got up obediently. Connor was looking at her expectantly. His eyes dark and predatory and it made her knees weak. When she stood next to him, he pulled her in his lap just how Murphy had and he kissed her right away. A slow deep, almost teasing kiss and she melted into him. When he pulled away, he looked at her with his hooded gaze as she caught her breath and he took note of how wide her pupils had blown. She looked drugged almost from their kisses and it pleased him greatly. He swept the hair from her shoulder and placed a soft kiss on the unmarked flesh on that side. She shivered at his teasing and he smirked against her skin before sinking his teeth into her, sucking on her skin. She gasped, her eyes fluttering shut as she gripped his shoulder, lest she fall onto the floor in a heap. The whole thing was erotic and made her head spin and she couldn't care less who was watching.

When he was done, he looked at the mark just how Murphy had and placed another soft kiss on the now sensitive skin, making her jump a little. He chuckled and kissed her cheek as she blushed deeply. She glanced back to Murphy, seeing him watching her amused and also turned on. She couldn't believe she had the affection of not just one of these stunning Irishmen, but two. It was overwhelming. It was then that the three noticed Rocco was no longer sat with them and they looked to each other confused. They scanned the place and then Lila let out an incredulous laugh, seeing her best friend dancing with Emily. The boys followed her line of sight and their eyes widened before they grinned. It turned out the funny man had decided to take matters into his own hands and they were glad he did, he seemed to actually like the girl. It was a little awkward, given the circumstance, the boys taking her virginity after all for a bet made by the funny man himself. But if he was happy, then they would support him.

Rocco's on and off again girlfriend Donna was the biggest bitch around, she treated him like shit and was constantly cheating on him. The boys wondered why the fuck he was even still with her but they knew deep down he still loved her, or who she used to be before she became a druggie whore at least. They were currently off, once again, and they hoped that having someone decent in his life would open his eyes that he didn't have to stay in a loveless relationship for the sake of it. Their best friend deserved real happiness, just they like had found. They couldn't even remember what it was like before Lila, when they had no want for a lass for something other than sex, when they had not experienced how it felt to love someone other than each other. They wanted Rocco to feel love again, to be truly fucking happy, because that's how they felt, and they didn't realise just how much they needed it until she came into their lives.


	30. Chapter 30

**This chapter didn't exist, I was on chapter 37, and every so often I read back through the whole thing to see where's it's at and if I missed something and this fucking happened. Not gonna lie, its short and just shameless smut, but it's important because its a first for these three. In my head, they had already done this together but I hadn't written it for some reason, and the boys weren't happy with that one bit, I don't wanna skim over these things, ya know? This shit is important!**

**Enjoyyyyyyyyyyyy!**

The clubbing scene had been erotic. With the slow beat, Lila dancing sensually with another girl, the boys marking her, the whole thing had them all so worked up. And Murphy being the always more impatient twin, couldn't even wait for them to get back to the loft before he had his hands on their girl. Half her clothes were gone in the fucking elevator and Connor watched, turned on and also amused by the fact his twin was so impatient, and the fact that Lila had no fucking qualms about being carried to the loft in just her fucking panties and heels. Connor graciously picked up her clothes as he followed on behind them both. He knew what was coming, no need to rush it after all. He and Murphy had a very interesting mental conversation at the club and despite the fact Connor seemed outwardly calm and collected, his body was thrumming with excitement at what the boys were going to do to the girl.

Murphy was clearly excited, not even able to hide it as he tossed the giggling redhead onto the bed, throwing her heels somewhere in the apartment with a thunk on the floor. Connor smirked watching as he started to strip off. Murphy stood up following suit and the twins looked down at her appreciatively. She blushed under their gaze and gave them a lopsided grin, the alcohol in her system making her not as flustered at the pair just openly fucking watching her in nothing but her panties. The boys shared a look and a smirk before looking back to her.

"I swear, if one of you don't touch me soon, I'll go back to the club and find someone who will." She squinted playfully, snorting loudly at their faces. Murphy's eyes had widened for a moment before he narrowed them and Connor just watched the lass amused. It took a little more to make him jealous and it was hard for him to take her seriously when she was giggling as she was. Murphy, however, well it didn't take much to get his brother jealous.

He gripped her legs and yanked her towards where he was stood and she squealed a laugh at the sudden movement.

"Ye heard this cheeky girl brother, what should we do wit' her?" Murphy asked with a dark smirk, his eyes never leaving Lilas flushed face as he spoke to his twin. Connor was also watching, noticing how her lips parted and her laughter vanished at Murphy's words, they always seemed to affect her so easy with just words. She was looking from one to the other, eyes wide and pink cheeks, the boys knew it wasn't just the alcohol that had her flushed.

"Show her who she belongs te, aye Murph?" Connor grinned, quirking a brow at him. The look they shared made Lila go weak at the knees and if she was standing, she surely would have just melted into a fucking puddle. Murphy leant down, licking from her panties to her belly button teasingly and she let out a breathy moan, closing her eyes at the touch. She could feel him smirk against her skin before he moved and she suddenly felt cold. They muttered something to each other in Russian and she huffed a little.

"It's rude to talk about a girl when she's just laying here waiting to be fucked." She muttered petulantly. Both pairs of stunningly blue eyes turned to look at her, matching smirks to boot and she bat her lashes at them, making them snort slightly.

In an instant, their clothes were gone and her panties yanked off by Connor and tossed haphazardly in the loft, at least they stayed intact unlike when his brother was done with them. Connor grabbed her wrist and she was yanked up and off the bed, melting into his arms as she looked up at him with a lazy smile. She vaguely heard Murphy snort at her behind her as she just looked up at the smirking lighter haired twin.

"She's certainly merry aye brother?" Connor asked amused, glancing to the darker haired twin who was now laying on his back in the middle of the bed. Lila looked back at him, her eyes wandering his body appreciatively. He wasn't even handsome, he was just fucking devastatingly beautiful like his lighter half. She couldn't cope. Connor turned her so her back pressed against his chest and her breathing hitched when his hands cupped her breasts.

"Get on me brother lass." He demanded firmly in her ear, the tone making the blood rush fucking south. She'd never been one to be bossed about before but these two just had that effect on her.

She obeyed immediately, climbing onto the bed and biting her lip as she gave Murphy a coy smile. He was watching her intently like she was the best thing he'd ever seen, and his hands settled on her hips as she straddled him, trapping his cock against her heat and his stomach. He wound a hand into her hair and pulled her down for a searing kiss, his tongue claiming every inch of her mouth as she just molded to him and kissed him back greedily. She didn't even realise she was grinding herself on him until he moaned loudly into the kiss, his hand on her hip tightening. It left her hip for a brief moment, moving to line himself up and she sank down willingly onto his hard cock, eliciting another loud moan from the pair.

Murphy looked at her with dark blue eyes, he could never get enough of this beautiful enchantress and how she felt around his cock, so warm and fucking inviting. He bucked his hips up into her, watching carefully as she moaned, her eyes fluttering shut in pleasure. She was too absorbed in Murphy to hear or feel Connor joining them behind her, and she jumped when she suddenly felt cold slick fingers against her other hole. Her eyes widened, her body stilling as her heart hammered in her chest. It wasn't like she hadn't had anal before, she'd done it a few times in the past. But this was different, if she presumed correct she would be taking them both at the same time and _that_, she had never fucking done in her life. Murphy licked his lower lip, studying her face warily for any signs they should stop. She'd had a fair bit to drink but wasn't drunk by any means and he hoped it had relaxed her enough she would go for it without them talking about it beforehand.

They weren't really sure how to broach the subject, knowing it would most likely make her nervous, but they had both wanted in her at the same time since they'd laid fucking eyes on her, they knew she would enjoy it if she relaxed enough but they'd never force her into anything. Connors' hand had stilled when he felt her tense and he was relying on his twin to let him know what the next move was. Murphy's hand in her hair massaged her scalp affectionately and she blinked at him slowly. They shared a moment, no words needed as they just watched each other. She wanted this, she had thought about it more than enough times, but now with the reality of it fucking touching her, she was nervous honestly, and both boys could feel it off her.

"Ain't gotta do anythin' ye don't want m'girl." Murphy whispered softly, giving her a loving smile that just melted her heart. She inhaled deeply and exhaled a shaky breath.

"I do...I do want it." She replied shyly, her cheeks turning crimson at saying such a thing out loud. Murphy's eyes softened as he looked at her, feeling nothing but pure love and adoration for the redhead he was currently inside of and he looked to his twin over her shoulder.

Feeling the mental nudge, Connor started to slip a finger inside of her and she moaned softly. It was so strange as Murphy was inside of her and honestly, it had been a while since anything was inside of that particular hole. Murphy pulled her down and kissed her, trying to distract her enough so she would relax. He felt her melt around him once again and he knew he had succeeded, rolling his hips up to her slowly and making her moan. When his brother inserted another finger, he felt her kiss him more desperately, nipping at his lips as she tightened around his cock just a little. It made him growl and tug on her hair gently, making her moan once more. She whimpered when Connor withdrew his fingers, now missing the sensation that had been so strange to her just moments before. She didn't have too much time to mourn the loss though as she suddenly felt the head of his cock pressing against her tight opening. She felt the nerves again and she focused on Murphy for a moment, his fingers in her hair, his tongue massaging hers like she was the best thing he had ever tasted.

Connors' hand was on her smooth back as he started to slowly push into her, being careful and taking his time with the lass. He and his brother had agreed he should do this first since he was more controlled. He knew his brother wouldn't be able to control himself feeling her even tighter around him and he may have ended up hurting the lass without meaning to. His chest was heaving, his face taut and strained as he slowly sheathed himself inside of her. It wasn't the first time he'd done this, but fuck it felt so much better with Lila than with anyone else. He rested his head on the back of her neck, panting breathlessly as he tried to summon his self-control so he didn't tear the poor girl in half, she felt so fucking divine around him.

Lila was breathing heavily, her forehead resting on the darker twin's as the three of them lay still for a moment, feeling connected in a completely different way. Connor was stretching her out and with Murphy inside of her too, she felt so gloriously full she thought she might just fucking die right there. Murphy started to move a little, unable to help himself as he watched her beautiful face right above him, smirking to himself at her needy moan. The boys set a steady careful pace, slow to the point it was almost teasing as she got used to the both of them inside of her. She'd never felt anything like it before, pleasure multiplied to the point she could barely breathe. They moved faster and she felt like her mind was starting to slowly fracture. Murphy watched her, watching how her face contorted in pure bliss. He'd seen her come undone before, but this, this was something fucking else. The twins' grunts and moans echoed in the loft along with Lilas desperate whimpers and moans, the girl getting louder and louder with each passing second. She felt like they lit a fire inside of her soul and it was consuming her from the inside out.

She couldn't even move, just lay there sandwiched between them as they both fucked her, filling her up in the best way. They were a tangle of sweaty breathless bodies, the energy in the air electric and thick, and she lost the plot of whose hands were whos on her, just lost in the blinding pleasure she was feeling. She started spasming around them both, her breathing erratic and dotted with needy gasps and moans, and then she fucking exploded. She wasn't sure if she made a sound, she couldn't hear anything, all she could do was feel. Her body was alight and she writhed and arched her back, the boys cursing up a storm at the feeling of her cum around them both and sending them both to their own release.

She wasn't sure how long she lay there, dripping in sweat with her head on Murphy's, until his twin pulled out of her carefully. She whimpered, feeling so empty now he had gone and then she was pulled off his brother. She blinked dumbly, feeling like she was high or on another planet and Murphy watched her with a lazy grin as he shifted to his side of the bed, Connor laying her next to him. She felt Connor situate himself behind her, hand splayed on her belly as he kissed her shoulder. All she could do was melt against him and blink slowly at the darker twin who had now turned to face her, stroking her hair lovingly.

"Enjoy yerself m'girl?" He asked softly, a knowing smile tugging at his lips as his eyes danced with amusement. She hummed softly, her cheeks heating up and she nodded, unable to even vocalise how she felt right then. She was sure she'd been to heaven and back. She felt Connors arm around her tighten ever so slightly.

"Ye dinnae regret it sweetheart?" He asked quietly, his voice thick with something she couldn't quite place in her love drunk state. He was serious though, and his words seemed to have made his darker half more serious too as he looked into her eyes as if looking for the answers. No doubt he couldn't get a read on her, she was too far gone to get a read on her fucking self at this point.

"Not at all. I think my brain may have melted though." She snorted tiredly, feeling so worn out after that wonderful little escapade.

Murphy's beautiful face broke out into a fucking grin at her words and he shook his head ruefully at her, she felt Connor rumble a laugh behind her as he relaxed, his hand stroking her belly softly. She wondered idly if this was a good time to tell them how she really felt about them, but consciousness soon eluded her as she slipped off into a blissful sleep, surrounded by her beautiful boyfriends. She felt safe and satisfied, calm and protected. So full of fucking love she may burst at the seams and she didn't mind one bit.


	31. Chapter 31

**So, I don't really know what to say about this one. It's a lot of internal monologue, mainly Murphy but some of Lilas and Connors too. Again Murphy just comes easier to me, he's more open and unguarded so it makes sense you find out more about his bond with Connor through his eyes.**

**If the driving test stuff seems off, I'm from the UK and have no idea how different it is for people over there, so just roll with it.**

**I never plan my chapters, some just follow from the last one, others just happen. And this just fucking happened. But it's important and full of brotherly fluff. It's also leading up to something, probably not what you think too. But it's the calm before the very thunderous storm. Enjoy the fluff whilst it lasts, because shits about to get real very fucking soon in a few chapters.**

Connor sat at the dining table, huffing and cursing to himself. He was surrounded by books, all spread across the table as he scribbled in a notebook. He was due to take his theory driving test in two hours, he'd already passed the actual driving portion of it. But for some reason, this part made him anxious. It was one thing actually doing the driving and showing he knew how, but this felt like a fucking exam and he hated it. So he was cramming, he'd borrowed every possible book from the library that could lend to his aid, and he was studying intently.

Lila and Murphy were sat on the couch snuggled up together with her legs over his. The pair kept glancing to the grumbling twin sat at the table, but whenever one would ask if he was okay or tell him he should take a break, they'd get a scowl, Murphy would get a few colorful words thrown in too but he didn't swear at Lila. They gave up in the end, just settling for watching some crappy tv and cuddling. Murphy was amused at his brother, he hadn't seen him like this since school. The pair had been rambunctious boys of course and they caused mayhem wherever they went, but at the same time, they enjoyed learning and always applied themselves. Connor more so. Murphy was still sometimes a little shit, even in class learning something he was interested in. He just couldn't help himself, sassing the teachers and making people laugh, he was the sillier twin after all. He could feel his twins nervous energy radiating off him strongly, and he knew Lila was feeling it too, although not as intense as he was. She kept shifting in her seat and he smirked to himself. She wasn't used to this yet, the connection, feeling things that weren't your own. He knew she was having difficulty with separating it from her own emotions, and right now, Connors anxiety set her on edge as if she herself was anxious.

Murphy had his whole life to deal with that, yet even he struggled to compartmentalise what was his and what was his brothers. He wasn't sure how Connor managed to do it, but he did. But he could also stuff his own feelings down whereas Murphy couldn't even do that. He was just more sensitive, more emotional, he had been that way since a young child. And as much as he would deny it until the day he died if anyone asked, he had a feeling deep inside that Connor was in fact the oldest of the two. The harder hearted twin who was always level headed, who was always there for Murphy when he needed him, picking him up time and time again. Even as children Connor was the one who looked out for him, whether it was teaching him to ride a bike because he couldn't seem to grasp it, or cleaning his scraped knees afterwards, apologising profusely after he had fallen off yet again. Their large differences in personality made them complete once together though, like two halves to make a whole, and that's why they worked so well together.

Of course, Murphy still had Connors back, he always would. He raised hell in his teens if anyone so much as looked at his brother the wrong way. But he'd never really been in a position where he had to take care of his brother, not in the way Connor had to take care of him every time he had a mental breakdown. Even if they got sick, Connor just got on with it, almost like he wasn't sick at all. And Murphy couldn't fathom how he did it, because when he was sick, he was miserable, even more emotional and very fucking whiny. Yet his twin never complained when he was sick, he would care for Murphy, looking after him without making him feel like a burden, even if Connor himself was sick at the same time. He took on the big brother roll from such a young age, almost acting as stand-in father since their own was absent. Murphy could never thank his twin enough for everything he had done for him, he didn't know what he could have possibly done to be graced with Connor as his counterpart, his better half, he didn't know where he would be without his brother.

He was broken out of his thoughts by Lila glancing up at him, she had a huge smile on her face and her eyes looked shiny like she was choked up, he looked down at her confused before glancing to the tv, like he would find the answer there to see why she was emotional all of a sudden, but it was still some cheesy ass game show. He looked back to her and she leant up kissing his cheek.

"He looks after you because he loves you." She whispered softly, making sure the other twin wouldn't hear her, although she doubted he would since he was so engrossed in his studying. Murphy's eyes widened, still not used to someone other than Connor being able to venture inside of his brain, but he knew it was the overwhelming love he had felt for his brother whilst thinking those things, coupled with being tangled with Lila, that made her able to feel it, hear him so clearly. He felt shy almost, like he had been caught out feeling soppy shit for Connor and he looked down, his cheeks flushing red.

It wasn't like she didn't know they loved each other, she knew just how deep their bond ran and she was right there with them. But the whole thing was still intense. They loved each other so deeply, in such a way people could never understand, and some people in their life, mainly jealous lasses along the way, had twisted those feelings. Saying they were in love with each other and that it was incestuous. But it wasn't like that, in any way shape or form. Murphy had no desire to fuck his fucking brother and he knew Connor didn't either. It wasn't romantic or sexual. But it was hard for other people to understand the bond the twins had without getting it mixed up with those things. And even though he knew Lila didn't think those things for a second, it still made him awkward, sometimes even ashamed as those feelings of embarrassment washed right over him all over again.

When those comments had been made, Connor would be offended of course, but it didn't affect him how it affected Murphy, just because the darker twin was far more sensitive to anything. Words hurt his soul, he took them fucking personally and they ate him alive. Connor could let words roll off him like water off a duck's back and they didn't bother him, sticks and stones and all that shite. But Murphy could never just ignore them. Those people had made him so deeply ashamed of himself and how much he cared for his brother and he hated it, because at times he had questioned their bond himself and wondered if it was even healthy. In the end he would be alright, they both would be. Because no matter what anyone fucking said, it was him and Connor until the end, and he didn't care. But every so often, like now, he could feel the embarrassment creep its way in, like even though Lila understood, he thought one day she would turn around and tell them how sick they were and how she had it wrong all along.

Lila frowned up at him, he seemed troubled but he was blocking her now. She knew it was her own fault for mentioning what she knew was going on in his head. She hadn't really meant to, Murphy's thoughts just touched her and she couldn't help herself. The adoration the brothers had for each other was something to behold and she felt lucky to be a part of that. But now Murphy was shutting down on her, he was shutting her out because her words had embarrassed him and that wasn't her intention in the slightest. She knew he was more sensitive to the issue than his blonde counterpart, he had mentioned in passing that people had said some unsavoury things, so had Connor. She didn't know exactly what those people said but she could take a wild fucking guess. She thought it was sick that people would accuse them of such things, they just didn't get it. They saw something they didn't understand and they twisted it up, making the brothers feel weird about how much they loved each other. That shit didn't sit right with the redhead at all. She wanted to nurture their bond, to encourage them. She never wanted them to feel ashamed of the way they cared for each other, it always made her smile when she saw them interact.

She took his face in her hands, making him look at her through his lashes and she could see him blushing.

"Stop shutting me out Murphy, you don't need to do that. Not with me." She said firmly, making him nod. He relaxed a bit, he already knew he didn't have to feel that way with her but it was almost a knee jerk reaction. He was unaware that Connors intense concentration was broken by Murphy's huge wave of embarrassment and he was looking over curiously. He was more guarded after the things people had said, it was why he and Murphy didn't really tell anyone about their twin thing, only Lila knew about the telepathy. Even with her, he was hesitant but his brother had told her in depth anyway. Because his guard was up, things didn't affect him as much, not as much as the first time it had happened. But he knew Murphy still felt that shame each time, it never got any easier for him, and right now it was resurfacing for some reason and he wasn't sure why. He hadn't been in Murphy's head, he had been too caught up studying, he had missed something said between the pair and now his brother was sat there blushing feeling embarrassed about their bond.

He looked to his work forlornly, he only had about ten minutes before he had to leave to get to his test in time, he doubted he was going to learn anything he didn't already know. He was still nervous but he closed the books, setting them neatly on the table before walking over. Instead of sitting near Lila, like he usually would and sandwiching her between them, he opted to sit next to his brother. Murphy was so far into his own head, he hadn't even noticed Connor coming over and he jumped, looking wide-eyed at his brother. He looked guilty, caught out as he knew without a doubt Connor had felt it, he wouldn't be sat there next to him with a stern look otherwise. Connor glanced to their girl who was looking at them both concerned, she was worried about Murphy, and Connor was glad the girl was such a beautiful soul, never judged, never made underhand comments. They were blessed to have her.

"Lila lass, don't suppose ye could make us a cup o' tea before I have te leave?" He asked softly, leveling his gaze on her. She blinked a little, she felt weird about leaving Murphy's side when he was acting like this but Connors face made it clear it wasn't really a request, it was a command. He wanted to talk to Murphy alone. It miffed her ever so slightly, she didn't like feeling out of the loop, but at the same time, she understood they needed to talk without her sometimes. Just because they were together and had this connection didn't mean they weren't still brothers. She nodded, kissing Murphy cheek sweetly, making him look at her pleadingly, like he didn't want her to leave. He felt like Connor was about to shout at him if he was honest, it wouldn't be the first time he had done so over Murphy being so bothered about it all. She felt bad, really fucking bad, but Connor was practically staring at her and his dominance had her instinctively submitting to him, and she scurried off. She almost snorted at the three of them. Connor was like the leader of the fucking pack, always in charge, always protecting. And despite Murphy's defiance and his dominance over Lila, because he was a bossy bastard with her, when it truly came down to the twins, it seemed like Connor was in charge. Not that she would ever tell sweet little Murphy that though.

Murphy shifted in his seat, unable to look at his brother and Connor watched him carefully as he heaved a sigh.

"Talk te me _deartháir_ (brother)." Murphy was shocked at how soft his brother's voice had come out, it wasn't harsh like he had expected. Murphy glanced at him through his lashes, licking his lower lip anxiously before turning his head to look at Lila who was making the tea for them. He looked back at Connor who was still looking at him expectantly but with kind eyes. He didn't fucking deserve his brother.

"Hey! Fuckin' stop that shite right now! I'll not be havin' ye thinkin' shit like that. Is that what this is about? 'Cause I don't know what I fuckin' missed but I sure as fuck missed somethin' with ye feelin' this way." There it was, Murphy knew Connor would shout at him, although it wasn't really shouting this time, more like talking with enthusiasm. He almost laughed to himself.

Lila had heard Connor, it was hard not to with such a small loft, it was why the boys usually resorted to just talking without words or using a language she didn't understand, she was honestly shocked they hadn't done it this time. She didn't look over though, she figured they didn't realise she had heard them. Murphy lowered his head, once again not meeting his brother's eyes and Connor huffed, grabbing his jaw and making him look at him.

"What? Ye don't want me anymore is that it? Ye don't want yer brother around?" Connor asked angrily. He knew it wasn't the case, he was goading his brother, because if he pushed, Murphy would break and actually tell him what the fuck happened. Lila swallowed thickly, Connors words making her heart seize up, she hoped to God they wouldn't have another physical fight. Murphy's eyes lit ablaze, forced to look his twin in his eyes with his hand gripping his jaw. Connor could see his nostrils flaring and he knew he was getting somewhere. He could feel the anger stirring within the darker twin.

"O' course I fuckin' want ye around, how can ye even ask that?" Murphy ground out, clenching his fists as he tried to resist the urge to deck his brother for even saying such a thing.

"Then what the fuck happened? We've been fine, ye've not felt like this in ages and suddenly it's back?" Connor squinted. Lila couldn't help herself, she didn't like this, both twins were blocking her now, too focused on each other it seemed and she was terrified they were going to fight. She brought the tea over, setting it on the coffee table as she sat on the floor in front of them.

"It was my fault." She said softly, looking awkward and her cheeks flushing from embarrassment. Connor let go of his brother, turning to her with narrowed eyes, almost accusingly and Murphy looked at her with wide eyes.

"It wasn't yer fault, what are ye talkin' about?" He asked confused, not liking the way his twin was staring the girl down.

"Ye fuckin' say somethin' to him?" Connor asked harshly, making Murphy glance at him cautiously. Lila just squinted unimpressed at him. He loved Murphy, she understood why he would jump to that conclusion and be mad, but it hurt her a little, she thought he knew her better than that.

"I was in his head, by accident. He was thinking about you, how much you take care of him all the time. And I told him you do it because you love him. I think I embarrassed him and it dragged a lot of shit up. Don't fucking take your shit out on me Connor, you know I wouldn't say shit like that." She frowned, glaring right back at Connor. Murphy looked down again, he hated how he couldn't control his emotions at times and now he had caused all this, Lila blamed herself and Connor was being an ass. Connor visibly untensed and looked at her apologetically. She was right, he knew she wouldn't have said something like that.

"M'sorry Lila, I know...I just…" He wiped a hand over his face and Murphy reached out, grasping his wrist. Lila chewed her cheek as she glanced between the pair.

"I get it. People have said some shit and you're looking out for him. But it will be a cold day in hell before I _ever_ think that kind of shit about you two. Whoever said that to you in the past needs their teeth kicked in, and I'll gladly do it if I see them." She huffed, hugging her knees a little, still sat on the floor.

The twins' mouth quirked up at her comment, she really did care about them. She knew them inside out, and she still didn't change her stance on their bond. They both loved how protective of them she would get, it was cute. She was a tiny thing but she was full of fucking fury when she was mad. Connor reached out, taking her by surprise, she could never get used to him doing that since he mostly expected her to come to him. He stroked her cheek affectionately with a sweet smile.

"We're lucky bastards te have ye Lila, ye don't know how special ye are." Connor said softly, just admiring the angel sat before them. Murphy made a humming noise in the back of his throat in agreement as he looked at her the same.

"Hmm...Maybe. I'm nothing special though, I'm just someone who sees you both for who you are. One soul, split in half." With those profound words, she stood, brushing off her ass from sitting on the floor. The boys looked up at her in awe, how she just fucking knew them so well. It was overwhelming for them.

"Drink your tea, you've got like two minutes until you have to go." She said softly as she made her way back to the kitchen.

Connor looked to the clock with wide eyes, he hadn't realised how much time had passed since he stopped studying. He felt the panic set in again and Murphy laughed next to him, looking like he felt better already, and Connor was glad. Murphy was intense at times with his emotions, it could make the air around them thick and tense. But now he was back to being normal Murphy, laughing at his brother's worry about the test.

"Ye'll do fine brother, stop worryin' so much." Murphy grinned, slapping him on the back affectionately.

"Fuckin' hope so, been wanting' te drive the thing since she got it me." He grumped, thinking back to the beautiful car their girl had got him. It had just been sat there since he didn't have a license. He had wanted to take it for a spin, but when Lila found out, knowing he had no license, she flipped her shit. He was almost desperate to get it out there. There were places he wanted to go, to take his brother and their girl. He loved his time at home with her, and even at the pub, but he couldn't wait to take her other places, do romantic shit with her that he hadn't even done with anyone before. Murphy snorted next to him again, looking at him amused at his train of thought and Connor clipped him around the head, but it only caused more laughter.

"Fuckin' shut it." Connor grumbled with a huff, but his twin just gave him a toothy grin. Yeah, they'd be alright in the end, they always were.


	32. Chapter 32

**I had this intense need to write a chapter each from the boys POV. It won't be the same chapter just going over it twice, don't worry lol, but this chapter will be in Murphy's perspective, and the next one in Connors. I'll still be writing in third person, it's just easier for me that way, I've only ever done first person once, it's a Murphy/OC story and I don't even remember if I've posted it yet haha. **

**But anyway, the boys wanted more attention, so this happened. I usually write my stories in third person, omnipotent kinda thing, so the reader knows everything that's going on, knows what's going through everyone's heads, not just Lilas, I like it that way, I think it's important to know what's going on with the boys too, at least in my story. **

**But this chapter will just be Murphy, so we won't know what's going on in Lilas head or Connors unless it's through the telepathy. And that will apply with Connor for the next one. I've got something intense and sad coming up, so these two are my way of saying sorry in advance lololol. I needed something lighthearted before I started something so feely, ya know?**

**This one is long AF, Murphy really went on a tangent with this one. I was surprised with some of the stuff in this one. I never plan my chapters, I just start writing, and I'm always surprised with what comes out lololololol. But I'm honestly really happy with this one, so many feeeeeeeeeeeeeels.**

**I hope you guys like this one.**

Connor passed his test, of course he fucking did. Murphy knew he would, Lila knew he would, and according to Connor once he got his results; '_O' course I fuckin' passed, I didn't doubt meself for a minute'. _The boys were drunk at the time and Murphy, of course, took great delight in telling the whole of the pub how Connor had indeed doubted himself and how he had been studying. That was the night before. Now Murphy was currently sat in the passenger seat as Connor drove them to work. Driving there and back meant more time with Lila since they'd get home quicker, and to Murphy, that was a fucking win.

Well, it would be if Connor actually drove properly, Murphy was wondering how the fuck he managed to pass his test.

"Jesus Christ Connor! Yer goin' like five miles an hour!" He huffed, pressing his head into the window with a scowl. His brother shot him a look, looking so fucking offended even though Murphy was being honest.

"I am not! I'm doin' the speed limit ye fuck! Ye want me te get done speedin' on me first day drivin'?" He grumbled, tightening his hands on the steering wheel. Murphy looked at him blandly, shaking his head.

"Ye drive like a fuckin' grandma." He stated dryly, and Connor whipped his head to him, his eyes ablaze and Murphy had to bite his lip so he didn't laugh. He always had way too much fun pushing Connor buttons, and he couldn't even do anything about it since he was driving and was all about being sensible suddenly.

"A fuckin' grandma?! I'll show ye a fuckin' grandma ye wee maggot." He muttered, making Murphy snort at him. It only turned to full blown laughter when Connor indeed hit the gas a little more. Murphy knew he would, it's why he said it. Connor didn't like to be challenged.

They got to work and were on the line for cutting the meat today, they were always being rotated around so everyone did a bit of everything to make it fair. Some things were harder than others, or more boring. Cutting meat was boring as fuck. He was stood with his brother, hacking at the meat as he listened to Connor bitching about...something. He wasn't really listening if he was honest. He was thinking about their girl, she'd be at home, no doubt cleaning or making those fucking delicious brownies he loved so much. He didn't even realise he was smiling to himself until Connor smacked him upside the head. Murphy turned to glare at him and Connor looked more than amused.

"Didn't realise ye loved meat so much brother, I'll be sure te tell the lass ye had a change o' heart." Connor snorted at him, making some of the other men on the line with them laugh. Murphy pursed his lips, narrowing his eyes at his brother. Connor knew full well what Murphy was really thinking because he was in his head, Murphy knew he just wanted to be a dick.

Connor smirked at him and shrugged. Murphy heard it in his head; '_What are ye gonna do about it brother?'_ Murphys face broke into a sly grin, forming a plan in his mind and making a point to block his brother out so he didn't fucking know about it. Connor squinted, feeling the barrier his brother was putting up, Murphy knew Connor would know he was up to something, and not knowing what it was, making him wait, that was one of the best parts because it would make him lose his damn mind. So Murphy took great delight in making him wait and stew, biding his time to get his brother back.

It was a few hours later and he waited for Connor to grab some more meat cuts. There was a bucket of blood under the table of the line, Murphy always questioned why it was there, he never saw who filled it up or where it came from, yet there it was. He dipped his left hand into the crimson liquid, fighting the gag that worked its way up at the strong copper tang and the feel of how goopy it was. The man opposite him quirked a brow looking amused and Murphy raised his free hand to his lips, telling him not to say a word. Everyone who worked with the twins knew of their antics, it often served as good amusement in the workday to make it pass quicker. Murphy saw Connor coming back in, so he took a breath, channeling all his acting skills.

He dropped the cleaver onto the floor with a loud clatter, falling to his knees as he cried out.

"Fuckin' Christ!" He yelled, trying to sound pained as he cradled his bloody hand. Connor dropped the meat he was carrying without a care, running to his brother looking panicked. Murphy could feel the fear radiating off him and he almost felt bad, but he didn't quite get there. Connor slipped on the drops of blood as he skidded over to his brother, Murphy's hand was so covered in blood it was hard to make out what 'happened'.

"The fuck is it?! What happened?!" He asked frantically, pulling on Murphy's arm to have a look. Murphy tugged back though, acting like it was fucking agony as tears welled in his eyes.

"I damn near took me thumb off, fuckin' hell Connor it hurts so bad." He sniffled, looking down to stop from laughing as he noticed the others looking on amused. Connor frowned, chest heaving as he tried to figure out what to do, he needed to get Murphy to a fucking hospital. Murphy bit his lip, knowing exactly what was running through his brothers head and he allowed Connor to help him up. Connor was being so gentle with him, it was ridiculous.

"I got ye _deartháir_ (brother), c'mon." He soothed as he tried to take his arm to look at the damage.

Suddenly a loud thwack echoed in the factory as Murphy slapped his bloody hand across his brother's pitiful face. The whole place went silent, Murphy grinning like a Cheshire cat at the handprint on his brother's cheek. Connor looked stunned for a moment before he turned his eyes back to Murphy. Murphy couldn't hold it anymore, laughing loudly and almost falling over. Everyone else erupted in laughter as they watched Connor looking like he was about to implode.

"The fuck was that?! I thought ye hurt yerself ye stupid fuck?!" He bellowed, his face turning red. Murphy only laughed harder and suddenly he was tackled by his brother. Murphy was laughing hysterically as he fought his brother to stop being pinned on the floor. He was unaware of how close the blood bucket was since he had moved it to use it. He eyes widened as Connor rolled them over and the bucked tipped, covering the pair in the sticky vile shite.

"Fuckin' Mother o' God!" Murphy cried out, scrambling to get up as his twin did the same, yelling a string of obscenities. The stuff was slippery though and the pair slipped as they tried to get up and everyone else was having a fucking field day watching them. Murphy gave up in the end, lay in the pool of blood, covered head to toe in the stuff, as his brother lay with him, the pair panting.

"I'll fuckin' kill ye." Connor grumbled weakly, sounding out of breath.

"Was fuckin' worth it te see yer fuckin' face." Murphy snorted at him.

Their boss wasn't happy, they'd made a mess and stopped production. Murphy felt like a scolded child as the man shouted at them but he knew he was right. They got sent home early to get the fuck out of the way, it reminded Murphy of being back in school, when the pair would get sent to the head teachers office after they'd had scuffle or caused some mayhem, getting sent home. Connor had whined something fierce about getting in the car covered in blood but they had no choice, they couldn't shower until they got home, and they couldn't just leave the car there or it might get stolen. Lila would kill them if that happened.

"Shit, Lila." The boys blanched in unison as they sat in the car. She was going to pitch a fit when the twins came home bloody like this. She'd be worried, then she'd be mad, and then she'd have to clean wherever they stepped on the way to the shower. They'd have to fucking toss their clothes.

Murphy was shoving his brother and laughing, getting shoved right back as they went up the elevator, and when they got to their door, Connor stopped him. Murphy looked at him confused. He didn't understand why they just weren't walking in, Murphy missed Lila horribly and he just wanted to get in there and see her. Knowing she was right there was driving him mad. He was happy they'd been sent home early, it meant they had hours with her before work.

"Lila lass, don't open the door, but are ye there?" Connor called out. Murphy quirked a brow, looking like his brother had grown three heads. The fuck was he doing?

"Uh… yeah. Why? Why are you home early and why can't I open the door?" She called back, Murphy could hear the hesitance in her voice and he knew she would be worried.

"We're covered in blood lass, but it's not ours, had a bit o' a...thing at work." He replied before opening the door. He was glad his brother had warned the girl, her eyes bugged out of her head when she saw them soaked in blood and he was grateful his brother had the foresight to tell her, knowing she would have keeled over and had a heart attack if he hadn't.

"Yer welcome." Connor smirked at him, all smug like, making Murphy sneer at him.

"What the fuck?!" Lila asked, her voice high as she looked from him to his brother. Murphy looked sheepish, he knew, he fucking knew his brother was about to score some major points with the lass when he gave her a sob story of the prank he had played and how he had worried.

"Well lass, Murphy here played an awful prank on me, gave me a real fright he did, I thought he was hurt." Connor started dramatically, holding a hand over his heart for effect, Murphy rolled his eyes. Here we fucking go.

"Aye, but I only did it 'cause ye fuckin' tried te insinuate I was gay and everyone heard ye!" Murphy yelled, flailing his arms about. Connor looked at him, his stupid sad fucking face. But Murphy knew better, he could feel Connors amusement from a mile away. Lila looked at them with a frown, clearly confused. Murphy knew sometimes she couldn't get a good read on them, it could be confusing feeling other people's emotions and with her, it wasn't always strong enough to pick it up or to hear their actual thoughts. She tended only to hear their thoughts when they were intense and she was touching them.

"The fuck does that have to do with you coming home looking like you played a part in Carrie?" She asked blandly, wrinkling her nose a little. Murphy didn't blame her, it smelt like shit.

"Connor knocked over the bucket o' blood and it went everywhere m'girl." He sighed, looking sheepish at her. He heard Connor snort next to him.

"What? And you both decided to just roll around in it?" She asked, quirking her brow.

"We might o' had a wee scrap lass, nothin' te worry about." Connor gave her an innocent grin and Murphy smacked him around the head. He heard Lila heave a sigh and looked back at her.

"Fine, as long you're both okay, then whatever, just get in the fucking shower and you can clean whatever you get bloody." She huffed pointing at them, walking back over to the dishes in the sink that she seemed to have been washing before their arrival.

"Sorry Lila." They replied in unison, earning a snort from over near the sink as they stripped off and turned on the shower. They'd just shower together since they needed to get clean asap or Lila would surely gut them. Murphy wasn't sure how she put up with them. She was like their Ma sometimes, in a good way of course. She always scolded them for being naughty and when they fought she made sure they made up. When it seemed serious she would always intervene. He was grateful for her. He recalled calling his Ma a few days prior, he and Connor had told their Ma about Lila. They'd been worried to if they were honest, their Ma was a right fucking character when she wanted to be but she was also overprotective. But they had spent an hour on the phone, just gushing about the girl and their Ma seemed to realise just how serious it was. She had mocked them at first, but then she said she was glad they had someone to keep her two pissants in line. The boys knew that was her way of giving her approval of the relationship. She never commented about the fact they were both in love with the girl, or how the relationship wasn't what would be deemed normal, but despite their Ma's flaws, she was a good woman, and apart from Lila, she was the only other person on the fucking planet that really just seemed to get them.

He could just see it, him and Connor taking Lila back home to meet their Ma, their Ma sat with Lila, bitching at how they made her grey before they could even walk, Lila laughing about it because she could just imagine it. Their Ma breaking out the baby pictures of the two and showing their girl. He stilled in the shower as a thought hit him like a tidal wave. A huge crash of emotions almost knocking him on his ass. Would they ever have kids with her? He was shocked to find he wouldn't mind it, seeing her with a round belly, carrying their child. They wouldn't know who was the father of course but he knew in his heart that wouldn't matter, they'd both be the Da, and they'd make fucking good ones too. Not like theirs who just fucked off and left their Ma to raise them all alone. He felt an ache in his chest, wondering if she would ever want that with them. She hadn't even told them she loved them yet and he was stood there thinking about kids.

He flinched when Connor suddenly reached out, grabbing his neck. He blushed deeply knowing Connor had heard his thoughts and he looked down, swallowing thickly as he tried to push the swell of emotions aside. '_One step at a time deartháir'. _He heard, Connor soothing him like he always did. He was right though, there was no need to rush anything, he had no plans on leaving the girl and he knew his brother didn't either. She was it for them, she was their soulmate, their anam cara, their one and only, forever and even after. They would have time to tell each other they loved her, to show her, but what about marriage? Another wave of emotions rushed through him but this time it was sadness. They both couldn't marry the girl, he wasn't really sure how to deal with that one.

He heard his brother sigh deeply next to him, squeezing his neck firmly. Murphy felt the rush of calm spread through his body, stilling his whirlwind of emotions inside of him.

"_Nous allons traverser ce pont quand nous y arriverons Murph, nous avons déjà quelque chose en tête pour ainsi dire. _(We'll cross that bridge when we come to it Murph, already have something in mind as it were)." Connor muttered from his left. Murphy licked his lower lip, glancing at him curiously. He was more than a little shocked Connor had been thinking about marriage with her too, so much so that he had come up with one of his stupid fucking plans for it.

"Ain't stupid ye _eejit._" Connor snorted, letting go of his neck to smack him lightly around the head, Murphy wasn't mad though, he was far too curious as he looked at his brother, wanting desperately to know what this plan was.

"_Allez ensuite, c'est quoi? _(Go on then, what is it)?" Murphy asked impatiently, hating waiting for anything. Connor looked at him amused before he sighed a little, glancing behind them to their girl who was now drying the dishes. Murphy followed his line of sight before looking back at his brother expectantly.

"_Nous ne pouvons pas l'épouser toutes les deux, vous êtes juste là. mais nous pouvons toujours lui donner un anneau, nous pourrions demander au poète de nous bénir. Pas tout à fait un mariage mais la même déclaration d'amour pour toujours. _(We both can't marry her, you're right there. but we can still give her a ring, we could ask the priest to bless us. Not quite a marriage but the same declaration of love forever.)" Connor kept his voice low, even though the girl wouldn't be able to understand anyway. Murphy perked up, it was a good idea, yet somehow it didn't feel enough. As if his brother could sense it, because he fucking could, he carried on.

"_Nous pourrions organiser une cérémonie, comme un mariage, et je pensais que, pour des raisons juridiques, elle devrait épouser légalement l'un de nous, prendre notre nom de famille ... Et je veux que ce soit vous. _(We could have a ceremony, like a wedding, and I was thinking, for legal reasons, she should legally marry one of us, take our last name...And I want it to be you)." Connor continued. Murphy's heart felt like it stopped for a moment at his brother's words and he felt Connor grabbing his neck again like he was afraid he would collapse in a heap on the floor.

"Me?" He asked, his voice wavering, incredulous almost that his brother had even offered him that opportunity. It was a big deal, for him at least. And even though Connors idea was a ceremony for the three of them and being blessed, that she would be linked to the three, legally she would be his wife, not Connors.

Connor nodded, looking at his brother carefully. Murphy was so overwhelmed he couldn't really get a feel of what his brother was feeling.

"_Mais pourquoi? Tu ne veux pas qu'elle soit ta femme? _(But why? You don't want her to be your wife)?" He asked confused, not understanding why Connor wouldn't fight him about this, how he had suggested it himself. Connor stepped a little closer to him and sighed softly.

"_Oui, mais la bénédiction me suffira. Je sais que tu es frère, tu es plus sentimental que moi. Vous avez besoin de cela plus que moi, alors c'est mon cadeau pour vous. _(I do, but the blessing will be enough for me. I know you brother, you are more sentimental than I am. You need this more than me, so this is my gift to you)." Connor replied, and Murphy almost fell on his ass from the sheer love for his brother he felt in that moment, for the love he knew his brother felt towards him to offer him such a thing.

Suddenly Murphy felt unsure of himself, he glanced back to Lila, now sitting there reading and he caught her eyes. She gave him a warm smile, not having any idea what they were talking about, seemingly so unaware and thinking they were just taking the time to clean the blood off them. He smiled back, his heart aching in his chest. She was so beautiful it made him want to cry at times. He knew he was a fucking girl about it but he didn't care.

"_Et si elle ne veut pas m'épouser? Et si elle te veut à la place? _(What if she doesn't want to marry me? What if she wants you instead)?" Murphy asked sounding like a small child. Connor looked at him almost sadly.

"_Elle se soucie de nous deux également, vous le savez. Elle pourrait avoir besoin de convaincre simplement parce qu'elle pourrait craindre de me laisser sortir, mais la bénédiction et la cérémonie sont pour nous tous, cela ne serait juridiquement contraignant que pour vous deux. Je suis sûr que nous pourrons la convaincre le moment venu._ (She cares about us both equally, you know this. She might need some convincing just because she might worry about leaving me out, but the blessing and ceremony is for all of us, it would only be legally binding for you both. I'm sure we could talk her into it when the time comes)." Connor said firmly, sounding so confident about it and the fact that the time would come and she would say yes. It made Murphy smile to himself, feeling the rush of Connors confidence his brother was pushing onto him.

He looked at her again, chewing his lower lip. His feelings for her were so overwhelming and he felt the need to tell her he loved her again. He knew he couldn't, not in the way he wanted, not yet.

"Should tell her brother." Connor whispered softly so she couldn't hear, especially over the running water. Murphy dragged his eyes from the pretty girl in their bed and back to his brother, his eyes wide.

"What? I...I can't." Murphy spluttered, horrified at the mere thought of doing so. Connor leveled his gaze on him, squinting a little.

"Tell her, ye want te tell her like ten times a day Murphy. Ye feel it, should just say it, get it off yer chest." He suggested quietly. Murphy swallowed thickly, raking his teeth over his lower lip.

"And what about you?" He asked, giving his brother a pointed look. He knew Connor wasn't ready just yet, he knew it would be a little longer until his twin came out with it. It wasn't that his brother didn't love her, Murphy knew without a doubt he did. He would probably plan it like he usually fucking did with everything, down to every detail, unless he just blurted it out. But Murphy didn't think that was likely.

Connor gave him a knowing look and snorted.

"Not quite yet for me brother, but I think it's time for you." He smirked. Murphy huffed at him, he was finally clean so he stepped out the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. Connor stayed behind, still washing himself but Murphy couldn't help but be suspicious since his brother was already squeaky clean. He looked back at Lila and she grinned at him, getting up off the bed. Murphy walked over to her, he couldn't help it. He always gravitated towards her, like a fucking magnet in her presence. He couldn't get enough of her, just being with her. They could sit there for hours doing nothing and he would be the happiest bastard alive. He smiled down at her when he got to her, cupping her cheeks as he kissed her.

He fucking loved how she tasted, always like coffee since she drank so much of the stuff. He loved the feeling of her pouty lips against his own, how it felt when he massaged his tongue with hers. He loved the feeling of her beautiful red hair in his hand, always grasping it as he kissed her. He loved how she'd moan when he did it, seeming to love it too. He broke away feeling breathless and it wasn't just from the kiss. He rested his forehead on hers and felt her rest her soft hands on his firm chest. Her eyes were closed and she was smiling to herself, making him smile too. She was a fucking angel, the most beautiful girl to ever exist on the fucking planet, and no other fucker could tell him otherwise.

"_Is tú mo ghrá_. (I love you)." He whispered, so softly he almost didn't hear himself say it. The anxiety gripped him like a vice as soon as he said it, worried he'd made a mistake, that it was too soon, that she didn't feel the same. His stomach dropped like he was on a rollercoaster.

Her eyes opened, wide blue eyes staring right up at him looking almost shocked at the out of the blue declaration. He looked at her feeling nervous, shy, like a fucking little boy about to get his heart ripped out and stuffed into a blender. But then, then she fucking smiled, a smile so radiant it felt like it was seeping into his soul and soothing any wounds he had ever received, that made his heart swell so much he feared it might explode.

"_Is tú mo ghrá freisin Murphy._ (I love you too Murphy)." She whispered back, her eyes shining bright as she smiled up at him. His heart shattered, but in a good way. It had become so full it simply couldn't take it anymore and just fucking shattered into tiny little pieces.

She loved him, she actually loved him back. He shouldn't have been surprised and all since she acted like she did, but to actually hear her say it, it was the best feeling he had ever had in his entire life. He felt himself getting emotional, what's new right? His eyes were burning with tears he was fighting not to release, lest he look like a fucking fool in front of her, crying like a baby just because she said she loved him. But Lila being Lila, she just knew, and she never judged him, he felt like he could be his true self around her, just like he could with his brother. And as she stroked his cheeks affectionately, a few tears escaped and he snorted at himself for being so fucking soppy. She wiped his tears away and he grinned at her, the same full-on smile that he had graced her with on his birthday after his little breakdown about his camera. A full toothy grin that was full of so much happiness. She beamed back at him, leaning up and capturing his lips once more. The kiss was tender though, unlike their usual kisses but he liked it. It felt fitting for the moment.

When she moved away, she smiled once again before going back to sit on the bed and continued reading. She looked happier now though, like a light was shining bright from within her and lighting up the whole loft. He didn't realise he was just stood there staring at her like a lovesick puppy until Connor slung an arm around his shoulder. He looked to his brother, unable to hide his smile and Connor grinned right back, feeling happy for his brother. Murphy could feel his happiness and it made his heart melt all over again. He loved how deep down, they weren't jealous of each other with the girl. They didn't have to compete and tell her they loved her at the same time, like they thought she would run off with the twin that said it first. Because they knew she cared for them the same, she had always said they were equal, and in telling Murphy she loved him it went for Connor too. And that made Connor so happy Murphy could feel it intensely.

He knew his brother would tell her when he was ready, and he wouldn't push him. Their relationship was a strange one; three people. Both of them loving the girl, it was one big relationship but at the same time it was also separate, Murphy and Lila, Connor and Lila. They didn't have to do things at the same time, they didn't need to do this together. They would do it in their own time with the girl.

"Told ye te tell her." Connor gloated next to him, laughing when Murphy squinted playfully at him. Murphy just clipped him around the ear and Connor laughed more. They heard Lila snort from the bed, watching them both with such adoration on her face. It made them over the fucking moon. She was theirs and they were hers. For the rest of their lives, and they had forever to make some great fucking memories with her.

_**Maireann lá go ruaig ach maireann an grá go huaigh.**_

A day lasts until it's chased away, but love lasts until the grave.


	33. Chapter 33

**Connors POV chapter now, it was a little harder to write, Murphy just comes easier for some reason.**

**I hope you enjoy it.**

**All the feels.**

It had been two days since Murphy had told Lila he loved her and she said it back, and Connor noticed the world hadn't actually fucking ended. Things didn't dramatically change or get weird. The only difference was Murphy being able to openly admit how he felt, whispering it to her a hundred times a day, making her giggle and blush like a kid that got exactly what they asked for on Christmas day. Connor still hadn't told her, but he was getting the deep urge to do so. Seeing Murphy tell her, seeing how happy it made her, it inspired him. He wanted to tell her because of Murphy, not in a competitive way, but because he had seen that he had done it, and it didn't make blood rain from the sky or the world set ablaze, it just made them really fucking happy.

She had always said she cared equally about them, she would never play favorites, and in telling Murphy she loved him, Connor knew it applied to him too. So it wasn't like he was scared she wouldn't return the sentiment anymore, because she obviously did. He was just guarded. He wasn't used to this, feeling things this intense, feeling love at all for someone other than his brother, and it was hard for him to know what to do with those feelings. He wasn't surprised his brother had just told her, no plans, nothing fancy, just the words. It was Murphy all over. And Connor was the one to push him to do so after all. He knew his brother would feel better once those words left his lips. As the days had gone on, he had seen how his brother looked ready to crawl out of his skin when he was around her, wanting so badly to tell her but being too scared. Connor was glad he gave him that push, because now his brother was free from that burden and so fucking happy it made his heart clench.

He wanted to tell her, and he would, but he wanted to plan it out. He wanted to do it in a way where he could show her too, he was never good with words. It wasn't that he wanted to outdo his brother, it wasn't like that at all and he would never dream of it. Lila knew how different they were. Murphy felt so deeply, and words just fell from his lips, he was always better with words. When Murphy spoke, he fucking meant it and it was hard for you not to take notice. Connor was more of a doer, to show her as well as tell her because deep down, he felt like the weight of his words wasn't enough.

That was why he enlisted the help of his emotional counterpart for his plan. Connor wasn't romantic in the slightest. He had never taken a girl on a date, he didn't get them gifts, he was clueless. Murphy, on the other hand, was very sentimental. He'd never cared for lass before, so it wasn't like he was more experienced than Connor, but with Murphy being so soppy, he would be better at knowing what to do. Murphy used to pick flowers from the neighbours garden and give them to their Ma when he was a young child. It would always make her smile and she'd put them in a vase on the table, and when they died, Murphy would cry. Connor never really understood why the flowers dying upset his brother so much, but Murphy would always go and pick more to replace them. That was the kind of sentimental person he was, and Connor just wasn't like that. He was a little more sentimental when it came to his brother and now Lila, but with something like this, he didn't even know where to start.

They couldn't execute his plan for another couple of hours though, and he was on edge with waiting. He was usually patient, Murphy was the one who had trouble waiting, but this was something new to him and he just wanted it over with. It didn't help that Murphy was so fucking excited about the whole thing that Connor could feel it. He knew Murphy was just excited for Connor to come out with it, so then it was all finally done and out there, completing the circle as it were. He was grateful when Murphy ended up falling asleep, head on Lilas' tummy as they just chilled on the bed talking and cuddling like they always did. Connor could finally get some semblance of peace from his twin's excited energy.

Connor and Lila decided to leave Murphy to sleep, he always looked so peaceful when he was sleeping, not like the hellraiser he really was. So Connor helped to ease Murphy off the lass and then they went to the sofa to watch some tv. He loved how no matter what they were doing, he just really fucking enjoyed her company. Being around her made him feel so happy, so fucking relaxed, he always wanted to be by her side. He just didn't show it like his brother did, the way Murphy followed her around like a puppy after a fucking treat. Connor had far more pride than his needy other half.

They were watching some old soap opera, laughing and commenting on every fucking thing that was wrong with the God awful show. She was sat in his lap sideways and he was stroking the nape of her neck, he was pretty sure he could hear her purring.

"Can I ask you something?" She asked suddenly, taking him off guard. He looked down at her and she was looking up with her beautiful blue eyes. He felt nervous all of a sudden, like she was going to ask him something he wouldn't want to answer and he swallowed thickly.

"Aye lass, what is it?" He asked carefully, looking wary almost. He watched as she raked her teeth over her bottom lip, she seemed nervous to ask whatever she was about to ask, he could feel it, and that only served to make _him_ nervous.

"Will you help teach me how to block my thoughts?" She asked quietly, blinking up at him. She looked like she half expected him to shout at her.

He was confused, of course he was, and a tad offended that she would want to block her thoughts. But being the rational twin, he thought about it, and he knew that she had the right to keep her own shit private. The boys had blocked her on occasion too, because some things were too personal, or they just weren't ready to share something with her, so of course she would feel the same. The connection was deep and profound, but it didn't mean they had to share every little thought with each other. Even the twins didn't do that. They didn't so much block each other that much, but they had become so accustomed to their telepathy, they could just tune it out, turning the volume down almost. Lila was new to this, a babe in the world of their weird twin connection, and he felt a little ashamed of himself that he hadn't just offered to teach her how to do it. He felt irresponsible that he and his brother hadn't even shown her much of anything, like they had given her the gift and then fucked off to let her figure it out herself.

"O' course sweetheart." He smiled down at her, she graced him with a beautiful smile in return. It always made his stomach feel weird when she did. Like there was a flock of birds inside of it fighting to get out and take flight.

"I was gonna ask Murphy but…" She looked down, blushing a little and Connor tilted his head as he looked at her.

"But ye know he'd pitch a fit that ye'd want te block us out." He stated, amusement colouring his words, not even asking because he knew that's what she thought, he knew because he knew his brother and it was very true. Murphy wouldn't rationalise it the way Connor did, he would just instantly be offended and upset. He wouldn't think about the fact she deserved fucking privacy in her own head, even though the darker twin had been the one to say the whole thing was invasive in the first place. But now things were different, Murphy had told her he loved her and she returned it, he knew Murphy would take some serious offense at the mere suggestion.

Lila nodded up at him, her cheeks crimson, and he knew she felt bad because he could feel it off her. He just smiled, stroking her neck soothingly, much like he usually did to his brother when he was upset, just far more gentler.

"Ye've got no need te feel bad lass, ye know yer right. Murph doesn't really think about things, he just feels. But I get it, and o' course I'll show ye, should o' shown ye in the first place." He said softly, pressing a sweet kiss to her head. She beamed a smile at him, looking like she felt better already. He tapped her leg, signaling for her to move and she did. They sat facing each other on the couch. He was a little nervous, he wasn't good at explaining things like his brother, showing her would be easy but he'd still have to explain it first so she really understood.

He took her soft hands in his own, stroking them as he looked at her, his brain in overdrive as he tried to figure out the best way to explain it to her.

"So ye know how te push yer emotions onte us aye? Ye've done it before." He said quietly, looking at her carefully. He knew the answer yet it still seemed like a question. She nodded as she looked up at him, squeezing his hands.

"Yeah, I'm still learning and stuff, but I can do it when I really concentrate hard on it." She replied, looking so serious it made Connor grin. Like she was in school learning something super fucking important. And it seemed he was the teacher, that led to some interesting thoughts. Lila snorted and swatted his arm, giving him a playful glare. Connor barked a laugh, it seemed the lass was getting better at hearing their thoughts, though he doubted she did it on purpose. The boys weren't really used to blocking them out, they didn't need to with each other, so they only really thought about blocking the lass if it was something intense.

"Aye, sorry lass, ye can't blame me...So, I'll try te explain it the best way I can, and then ye can practice on me. Sound good?" He smiled at her, making her grin and nod. He licked his lower lip and took a breath.

"So te block things out, ye gotta think o' a wall as such. Like a barrier. It's hard te explain, me and Murphy just do it if we need te, we've done it since bein' wee babes so, I'm not quite sure how te...explain it te ye so ye can grasp it." He muttered, pursing his lips as he thought of a way to teach her something he just knew how to do without being taught.

"How do ye push out yer feelin's, how is it ye do that? WIll ye explain it te me sweetheart?" He asked carefully. If he knew how she managed to figure that out, it might help him know where to go with this. She nodded and sat up a little straighter, looking like she was bracing herself.

"Umm...well it's like...I just see it in my mind? Does that make sense? Like I feel it, and I have to close my eyes to really think about it, but I focus on how I feel, and I kinda like, push it, ya know? I picture it like a bubble, and I'm like, making the bubble grow? I sound ridiculous." She snorted, looking down at their hands.

Connor frowned, he didn't like it when she took the piss out of herself, although he knew just how hard it was to try and vocalise what the fuck this was with them. It was one thing understanding it in your head, it was another to try and put it into words.

"Doesn't sound ridiculous Lila, it makes sense. Me and Murph don't have te do that because we've just always been able te, but yer new to this. We've both been pretty impressed with how ye've been pickin' it up so quick." He said firmly, making her look at him with a smile as her cheeks flushed. She looked so damn proud her herself from his compliment, he resisted the urge to just grab her and kiss her until she couldn't breathe.

"So, ye visualize it? That seems te help ye with the focus. So maybe, if ye visualise a wall? Like a barrier aye? Think o' putting the barrier up, like the bubble ye mentioned, only this time, the intent isn't te push out so we can feel, it's te keep us out." He suggested, shifting in his seat a little.

"Okay, I can try that." She smiled, she seemed nervous though and he brought her hand up to kiss it before letting it go.

"I'll not touch ye at first, it's harder to block with physical contact, we can take it one step at a time. Let's have a go aye? Think o' the wall, and when yer ready, think o' somethin' and I'll tell ye if I can hear it or not. Might take a few tries for ye te get it, since I've been doin' it longer." He grinned at her. She nodded, inhaling deeply as she shuffled back from him ever so slightly, just to make some more distance between them. She closed her eyes and Connor watched her intently, she was breathing slowly and her brow was furrowed in concentration, it was fucking adorable. He was waiting, tuned in to her and waiting to feel the barrier like he usually could with Murphy, or if he could hear her thoughts.

He could feel a slight block, but he knew before she did that it wouldn't be enough. It would easily be able to be broken. But with practice, she would get better. He didn't say anything to her, waiting to hear what he knew he would definitely be able to hear, knowing the barrier wasn't strong enough.

'_I think it's cute when Murphy talks in his sleep.'_

He barked a laugh at her thoughts, she was too fucking adorable for her own good but he knew damn well what she was talking about, his brother never shut up, even when he was asleep it seemed. Lila opened her eyes, squinting and huffing at him looking so disappointed. He reached out and squeezed her leg.

"Hey now, none o' that aye? I told ye it would take a few goes. I felt the wall, but it wasn't enough, it was weak. I could hear ye, but it wasn't as strong, ye sounded further away. Try again." He demanded firmly. She was pouting at him, but she closed her eyes to comply once more. Connor noticed she always did as he told her too, unless she was mad at him or his brother for some reason. It gave him a rush of primal satisfaction that she submitted to him every time.

'_I think Murphy is the oldest brother.'_

He blanched, so fucking offended and when she opened her eyes she laughed loudly at his face.

"Ye wee cheeky lass, I'll have ye for that one! Ye know it's not true, I know ye think it's me." He snorted, shooting her a playful scowl. She blushed and smiled, looking down and he knew he had her there, she did think he was the oldest, but unfortunately for him, he knew it was nothing to with the size of their cocks.

"Try again, concentrate harder _mo stór _(my darling), I know ye have it in ye." He said confidently, patting her knee before removing his hand once more. She heaved a sigh but nodded, he knew this was hard. He couldn't imagine having to learn all of this now, he was lucky enough to just be able to do it second nature. She had her eyes closed, breathing steady, and he tried to reach out to her again, but this time he couldn't. He kept trying, testing the barrier so to speak, but it didn't budge. He smiled to himself, feeling pleased and proud of her.

After a minute she peaked at him, he knew he had not reacted to whatever she had thought and he was actually curious about what she might have said this time. He was grinning at her, not able to hide his pride as he just looked at her like she was a glass of ice cold water on a hot day.

"You didn't hear me?" She asked hesitantly, a small smile creeping its way onto her face.

"No lass, although I can't lie, I'm fuckin' curious te know what it was." He smirked at her, making her laugh. She pretended to zip her lips and Connor shook his head snorting at her.

A few hours passed and it was now go time for his plan. He was regretting the whole thing though as he stood there on the roof alone. As part of his plan, it meant the twins had to separate in order to get Lila out of the fucking loft for a bit so Connor could get set up. He was on edge as he paced, checking everything over. It all looked so…fucking romantic, he almost gagged to himself. This wasn't him at all, yet he knew this was what he needed to do to show her, not just tell her, he wanted it to be special. People didn't really come up to the roof anymore, although they used to at one point. That's why there were a table and chairs, looking like garden furniture that looked so out of place there on the roof. There were also pots of plants scattered around looking like they'd seen better days. It was 6 now, the sun was starting to set and it made the whole thing feel even more romantic.

The take out was set out on the table, a few tealight candles in the middle of it. There were even some fairy lights twisted around one of the long planters, blinking at him softly. Murphy had thought of all of this, of course he fucking did. Connor wouldn't know how to set up something like this even if it smacked him in the face. And it seemed that despite his brother never being in this situation before, he had clearly thought about it. He'd even suggested bringing a blanket incase Lila got cold.

"_-and ye should get some o' those twinkly lights, ye know, like the Christmas ones? But not the colourful ones, the plain ones." Murphy suggested as they stood side by side at work, putting the meat cuts in boxes. _

"_Ye mean fairy lights?" Connor asked, looking at his twin for a moment, his face all serious. He was just glad Murphy wasn't ribbing him for all of this, if anything he seemed in his element. Murphy looked at his brother incredulously before he snorted a laugh._

"_Aye fairy lights. Ye sure ye need me help brother? Ye seem te know what yer talkin' about." Murphy laughed, Connor knew the teasing would have come along eventually._

"_Fuck you! I know shit, alright?" He huffed, stuffing the meat in the box. Murphy just laughed louder._

"_Mhm, alright. But ye should also take a blanket out for her, it's gettin' colder now and ye don't want her gettin' cold when we're up there." He said softly, becoming serious. Connor smiled to himself, it was cute to see his brother looking out for their girl._

He was anxious, he kept reaching out to his brother, but he'd have to stop to really think about it since he wasn't there with him. He imagined this was how Lila had been feeling when she was learning all of this. From what he had felt from Murphy, his twin was also anxious to be separated but was also delighted at having some time with their girl. He had taken her shopping, saying they needed booze. Lila had been suspicious from the get-go when Connor had told her he was going to stay behind because he felt under the weather. The longer he waited for them, the more anxious he got, and he was pacing around wondering if he should not tell her at all. Maybe he could just avoid it? His brother would never let him, he knew that, and Lila would only be confused why he had arranged all of this in the first place. He looked off over the building, may he could just jump off and not have to face his responsibilities. He snorted to himself, since when was he turning into Murphy?

He was broken out of his thoughts when the door to the roof opened. Murphy came out first and Connor watched as his twin's eyes scanned the place, eyebrows raised as he looked impressed and he grinned at him. Of course, he was all too pleased with himself, it had all been his idea in the first place. Lila came out from behind Murphy and she stopped dead when she looked around, she looked shocked and Connor bit his lower lip nervously as he watched her. Her shock melted into one of her lovely laughs, the kind she did when she was so fucking happy, and Connor couldn't help but smile as he relaxed. He saw his brother give her a light shove and watched as she turned back squinting at him, no doubt putting two and two together and knowing Murphy had been part of the plan and it was why he had taken her out of the loft without Connor.

She looked back to Connor, walking over slowly as her eyes still took everything in. He glanced to Murphy nervously, his brother was still stood there giving him their privacy and Murphy shot him a smile. He felt the nudge in his mind, his brother comforting him, urging him to just do it. Lila reached him, smiling up at him as she slipped her hands up his shirt, resting her hands on his stomach. She did that a lot he noticed to both him and Murphy, it made him feel good that she wanted to touch him.

"What's all this?" She asked softly, she was overwhelmed, he could feel it, he felt the fucking same if he was honest. His hands came to rest on her hips as he looked down at her, feeling the panic bubbling away in his chest.

"I just...I wanted te do somethin' nice for ye...te show ye...te show ye that…" He clenched his jaw, getting frustrated at himself that he couldn't seem to just say the words, like something was stopping him. He wished he wasn't so guarded, that he was more like his twin who just said what he was feeling, damning the consequences.

Murphy nudged him again as Lila looked up at him curiously, he closed his eyes and rested his forehead on hers. He wasn't blocking her, he was pushing onto her, letting her feel it so it would help him with what he was trying to say. He heard her gasp, her eyes widening as she looked up at him as she felt the absolute love he had for the lass, the love he was letting her feel. He knew it would be intense, it was intense for him. She didn't say anything, just blinking up at him looking like she was scared to move and break the moment. He took a deep breath, trying to steady his nerves. It was now or never.

"_Is tú mo ghrá _(I love you)." He said firmly, looking her right in the eyes. He knew she could still feel him and he didn't want to break the poor lass, so he stopped pushing his feelings onto her, letting the words hang in the air.

She looked shell shocked, he wasn't really surprised, she had probably expected to have to wait a lot longer for him to say it, maybe even thought he never actually would. But it was done now, he had said it, and just as his brother had, he felt better to get it off his chest, like a weight had been lifted, making him feel lighter. Her face broke out in a grin and she grabbed his shirt, yanking him forward and crashing her lips onto his. It caught him off guard but he soon got over it, gripping her hip tightly with one hand as the other went to her neck. He could feel her rapid pulse under his hand as he kissed her deeply, and he growled when he felt her nip his lips before pulling away. He actually chased her lips, in a Murphy act of neediness and she snorted at him.

"_Is tú mo ghrá freisin Connor _(I love you too Connor)." She beamed at him, making his whole body flood with warmth. He already knew she did, since she had said it to his brother, yet to hear her say it directly to him, not just knowing like some kind of after effect from her declaration to his brother, it made his heart squeeze painfully tight and he grinned at her.

He was just looking down at her as she looked back, making fucking moon eyes at each other when he heard Murphy clear his throat as he walked over. Connor looked at him, taking note of the shit eating grin on his brothers face.

"Well then, now that's outta the way, let's eat." He laughed lightly, sounding so happy. Connor watched with delight as Lila walked over and pinched Murphy's side, making him yelp and grab her around her waist. She squealed and giggled, squirming to get out of his grasp as he laughed joyously. Connor knew Murphy was right as he watched them, it somehow did make it feel complete, like the whole thing had come full circle. They weren't hiding shit from each other now, the feelings were out there and there was no need to hide them anymore. There was no need to feel the intense pressure in his chest every time he felt it so deeply, but wouldn't tell her, there was no need to carry that God awful weight around on his shoulders anymore, because it was out there. They loved her, she loved them back, equally and unconditionally. He didn't need his guard up so much with her anymore, she was one of them, she was fucking a part of them, their very being, their very soul. She was ingrained in them, bound to them some fucking how and for some fucking reason. But he wasn't about to question why God had gifted him and his brother with such an angel, he would just graciously accept it and thank him every day for the rest of his damn life. It was the very least he could do for such a precious gift.


	34. Chapter 34

**Don't hate meeeeeeeee lolololol**

**Shit gets real, brace yourselves some for intense feels in this one.**

**I actually struggled with this one for some reason, I don't know if its the intensity of it or what, but I'm glad I pushed through and churned it out.**

**Enjoy! Or don't, cause I mean...well you'll see :')**

Lila was pacing in the kitchen as she chewed her thumb anxiously. She knew something was very fucking wrong, glancing to the clock every fucking second. The boys should have been home from work an hour ago, yet they were nowhere to be seen. She wondered if the God awful morning they had, had anything to do with it, but she couldn't shake the fear that was clawing at her. That morning, they'd had a fight. Or well, Murphy had a fight with Connor and Lila to be precise.

She had woken up before the boys, which was a rare thing on weekdays. She had a sense of dread inside of her, the same sense of foreboding that she'd had the night of the bar fight. Something felt off and she didn't like it. They were all here, they were safe, she couldn't possibly think what it could be, so she chalked it up to being emotional, maybe she was due her fucking period or something. To distract herself, she set to making the boys breakfast before work. Usually, they would let her sleep, not waking before they left. They would grab some toast or pop by the diner to get their breakfast on a workday. They ended up waking earlier than usual from the smell of food, both happy to be able to spend more time with the lass before work.

She had still felt off though, and Murphy had picked up on it. And when he asked her, she panicked. Because in her head she was just being stupid and hormonal and it made her feel silly. So what did she do? She blocked him of course, in the moment of panic she closed off her mind and when Murphy reached out to her, he fucking felt it. The boy was furious. But it wasn't until Connor jumped in to defend her, telling his twin he had been the one to teach her and she had been practicing on him, when shit really hit the fan. Murphy was beyond pissed that his brother had taught her how to shut them out, that he had done so behind his back.

"_The fuck ye mean ye been teachin' her?! The fuck ye want her te shut us out for?!" He bellowed, standing up so fast the chair tipped over. Lila shrunk back in her seat feeling uncomfortable, so she grabbed the dishes and went to the sink with them. Connor stood, leaning his hands on the table as he looked at his brother sternly._

"_Her thoughts are her own Murphy! She deserves some fuckin' privacy aye? Yer the one that said it was invasive, what the fuck changed?!" Connor asked angrily._

"_Fuckin' everythin'! It's different now, we're together and we love each other. We ain't supposed te be keepin' shit from each other anymore!" He shouted, his arms flying about. Lilas' heart dropped when she realised it wasn't just the fact she was blocking him, it was the fact Connor had taught her behind his back and neither of them had told Murphy._

"_Murph, we didn't tell ye 'cause we knew ye'd lose yer shit! Just like ye are now!" Connor replied, throwing his hands up in the air exasperatedly. Murphy scowled, moving around the table a little as his chest heaved._

"_Ye didn't keep shit from me before __**she**_ _came along." He sneered, gesturing to the girl who was now watching with wide eyes._

_His venomous words made her take a step back like she had been winded. The one thing she had always said was that she never wanted to come between the boys, and here they were, arguing because of her. Her breathing hitched when Murphy turned his glare onto her, he was so fucking angry._

"_Ye got what ye want girl, aye?! Got us fightin', is this what ye fuckin' wanted?!" He roared at her which such intensity it made her bones ache. It made her feel sick to her stomach that Murphy would say that, to insinuate that she had done this on purpose. The loft went silent at his words, Connor looking at his twin horrified he would even say such a thing, he knew Murphy didn't really feel that way and now he'd gone and hurt the lass. Lilas eyes prickled with tears as she looked at him, her bottom lip trembling as she fought the urge to cry. She was mad at him, she was mad he would say that about her when he knew her way better than that. It was just a low blow. _

_Murphy's chest heaved as he glared at her, his anger ebbing away as her heartache washed over him relentlessly. He hadn't even meant it, but he could never keep his mouth shut when he was mad. It was like, if someone hurt him, he would just hurt them back, saying whatever he could that he knew would strike a nerve. But now he just felt like a guilty asshole as he saw her fighting not to cry._

"_Lila, m'girl...I-" He started as he took a step towards her, shaking his head feeling ashamed of himself._

"_Don't!" She snapped, her eyes ablaze as she looked at him. He stopped in his tracks, swallowing the lump forming and Connor walked over to her. Wrapping an arm around her shoulder protectively as he shot his brother a harsh look._

"_Please m'girl, I didnae mea-" He tried again, the guilt consuming him._

"_Just go, you'll be late for fucking work." She stated emotionlessly, moving from Connors' arm and going to the bed. She climbed inside and pulled the covers over her head. Connor glared at his brother with such fury, Murphy thought he might get a clock around the head._

"_Good fuckin' job brother." He spat, barging into Murphy's shoulder as he walked past to grab his coat. They both left for work without a kiss or a hug, without so much as a goodbye._

Lila wondered if maybe they needed some brother time after the whole thing, or maybe they had to stay at work later. But still, something seemed off, like she knew something was wrong. She had tried to reach out to them mentally, but of course she couldn't. If the twins found it hard to do so when they were apart, she doubted she ever would be able to. It just frustrated her. Anything could have happened, but she just knew deep inside of her it was something bad. The sense of foreboding had morphed into blind fear and she wasn't sure what to do.

She jumped when she heard a loud knock at the door and she ran over, swinging it open. Rocco stood there and it was the look on his face that made her almost throw up. He had tears down his face, he looked pale.

"Lila...fuck...The boys...they were in a car accident. They're in fuckin' hospital." He said forlornly. Lila clutched her chest, she felt lightheaded at the news and the look on Rocco's face made it clear it was bad. Really fucking bad. Rocco reached out, grabbing her before she fell and she broke down, sobbing. He held her tightly, stroking her hair as he cried himself.

"Fuckin' fuck...Lila...I ain't good at this shit." He muttered brokenly with a sniffle as he held her tight. She moved away, wiping her eyes as she looked at him and tried to breathe.

"How bad is it?" She asked hesitantly, almost like she expected the worst news. He shifted on his feet as he wiped a hand over his face.

"They've not woke up yet. They're hooked up to fuckin' machines and shit. I'm here to take you to see them...in case…" He couldn't finish his sentence, the lump in his throat growing and only getting worse when Lila started wailing again.

It felt like her heart had acid poured all over it, and it was burning her alive. She didn't even remember getting in Rocco's car, she didn't remember getting to the hospital. Her brain only switched on again when she was lead to a room. Both boys were laying in beds, the beds side by side that Rocco had insisted on in case they woke, knowing they wouldn't want to be separated. They were both hooked up to machines that were in the space between their beds and there was so many tubes, a large tube down each of their throats. The beeping of the monitors blared in her ears as she fell to her knees, her heartbreaking sobs filling the room. Rocco shook his head, more of his own tears falling at seeing his best friends like this, at hearing the girls heartbreak.

She had switched off again, she didn't know what happened between her breakdown to the very moment she was sat in a chair between both boys. She was staring out at nothing. She felt like she shouldn't have any tears left, yet they still kept coming. Rocco had gone to grab them some coffee. If she wasn't in some kind of shock she would have appreciated how the funny man had not left her side, how he had comforted her as much as he could. She felt numb almost, except for the dull ache in her chest. She wiped her eyes again, only for more tears to replace them. She didn't want to think about how bad this was, she didn't want to think about the fact they may not wake up, or the fact they could have brain damage if they did. The doctor had said something about a head-on collision with a drunk driver. She had zoned out, she couldn't be sure.

Suddenly Murphys machine flatlined, and it snapped her out of fucking everything as her heart exploded.

"Nurse! Nurse!" She screamed loudly, jumping out of the chair as she watched in horror. The staff ran in, a crash cart with them and Lila was shoved to the door. She was screaming, crying, fucking hysterical and she just about felt Rocco grab her before she collapsed, she could hear him sobbing as the staff tried to resuscitate the darker twin. Connors' eyes flew open abruptly, thrashing wildly and tugging at the tubes stuck down his throat. His eyes were wide and wild looking as he kept looking to his brother desperately, crying out, muffled by the tubes. Some more staff came in and tried to hold him down so they could remove them but he was bucking and thrashing hard, trying to get to his brother desperately. He could hear someone wailing like a fucking banshee but he couldn't think about it, he needed to get to fucking Murphy.

As soon as the tubes were removed, he dived off the bed, his legs almost giving out as he tried to grasp Murphy's hand, his own anguished cries echoing in the room. It was like no one else existed in that moment for him, the only one he could see was his brother. He was restrained again, moved away as he fought and screamed, full of fury and fire; threatening every single person that got between him and his counterpart. They were still working on Murphy and Lila was screaming bloody murder, fighting against Rocco to get to him, to Connor, any one of them, she didn't care. She couldn't feel him, she couldn't feel Murphy despite being in the same room and suddenly, Connor locked eyes with her as he yelled and kicked at the staff to no avail. She knew he felt it too, or didn't feel it to be more exact. His own twin couldn't feel him and it filled her with such dread she thought she might fucking die herself.

Connor managed to break free and he darted forward, grasping at Murphy's hand so tightly, that when the staff tried to pull him away, he jostled his brother. The other staff were still working on him, using the crash cart to try and bring him back, no one was supposed to touch him.

"Murph?! Fuckin' Murph! No!" He bellowed, tears blinding him. Without warning, Murphy's monitor started beeping again, and with the shock of this, Connors grip faltered and he was pulled away once again looking wide-eyed and shell shocked. Lila let out a strangled cry of relief. She sagged against Rocco and the unexpected weight of her made him fall to the floor with her, arms still around her. Connor was still pitching a fit and fighting the people holding him but this time they let him go. He ran to his brother, sobbing and crying as he gripped his poor beaten face. He felt so much relief to be able to feel him again, he didn't even care about crying in front of everyone. He fell to his knees, grasping his brother's hand in his own as he thanked God for letting him live.

Rocco finally let go of Lila and she dived at Connor, he just about caught her and he didn't care about the pain he was in. His body was banged up to hell and his head hurt like a mother fucker, but none of that mattered because getting to Murphy had been far more important. He clutched her with his free hand as she sobbed into his chest, and he knew she had felt the disconnect from Murphy too. He knew how worried she had been, the blood turning fear, because he had felt the same. They both couldn't speak, they just held each other and cried as Connor continued to squeeze his brother's hand so tight, like he was scared the boy would just dissipate if he let go. Rocco stood on shaky legs, moving over to the chair as he put his head in his hands, the whole thing had been too close of a call and they still didn't know if Murphy would be alright. It had taken it out of him.

They sat there for a while, just clinging to each other before the nurses came back in.

"Mr MacManus, we need to get you back in bed. You're still under observation, the doctor needs to check you over." She said warily. The staff had seen the man lose his shit after all, they were a little more than apprehensive to ask the man to move away from his brother. Lila felt Connor tense at the words, his arm around her tightening to the point it was almost painful. It was obvious he didn't want to move away from his brother. She squeezed her arms around him, letting him know she was there for him, no matter what. Of course, she was worried about him too, he'd been in an accident after all, but if Connor couldn't bring himself to move from his twin, who was dead just moments ago, she would fucking support him with it.

The nurse sighed a little at the silence she was met with, she knew this was a delicate situation.

"Sir, the doctor needs to check on you. The quicker you get back in bed, the sooner he can see to you, and if everything looks normal, you can come back to your brother." She suggested softly, having clearly been in fragile situations more than a few times. Lila knew it was a good idea, the nurse was right. If Connor kept fighting them it would only make things harder in the long run and she worried that they may end up separating the pair if Connor was hindering treatment, not only for himself, but his brother too.

"Connor, please listen to her. You need to get checked over. What good will you be to him if you suddenly fucking keel over?" She pleaded softly, her voice hoarse from screaming so much. He inhaled deeply, once again his arm tightening and she wondered idly if he was going to crush her for the suggestion. But she felt him nod against her head and she felt relief sweep through her. She had enough worrying about Murphy after he had just fucking died and came back without having to worry about Connor doing the same. She knew her heart wouldn't be able to take it. She moved away and looked at him, and she couldn't help how her breath caught in her throat or how her face went even paler. She obviously knew they'd be banged up, but she hadn't really taken note of their injuries when she came in, too busy being in shock from seeing them on life support.

Connors whole face looked like a fucking bruise, and she was sure his nose was broken. He had a gash in his forehead that had been stitched up. His left arm was in a cast, how she hadn't noticed it since it had been wrapped around her, she didn't know, it explained why it felt like he was crushing her. He was in a hospital gown and his arms were littered with bruises and cuts, it looked like shards of glass had attacked him. She dreaded to see what Murphy looked like. He looked back at her, watching how her face fell when she saw the state of him, how her eyes burnt with tears. He could feel her overwhelming sadness and worry.

Rocco came over then, Connor hadn't even noticed the man, but he helped Lila stand up and Connor was grateful, there was no way he could do that himself. His best friend then helped him to stand too, and Connor wrapped him in a hug, wincing at his sore ribs as he did. When he looked at him, it was clear the funny man had been crying, and he wondered if he was the one to bring Lila here. Connor and Murphy had put Rocco down as their emergency contact a few years prior after a bar fight gone wrong, so he knew they would have called him when they got here. Connor was glad Lila hadn't been here all alone. They didn't exchange words, there were no words to fucking comprehend this shit show of a situation. Connor just pat him on the back and they moved away from each other.

The nurse helped Connor back to bed as he grumbled under his breath. The bed was right next to his brothers but it wasn't close enough, he had the deep need to be able to touch him, to be able to feel him stronger. Lila glanced over at Murphy and her heart sank at the sight of him. Her poor little Murph. He had a bandage around his head and both his eyes were swollen shut. His face was black and blue and it was hard to believe he was her Murphy. His right leg was in a cast and his right arm in a sling, not a cast so it didn't look broken. He too was covered in lots of tiny cuts and bruises. Not to mention that fucking tube down his throat.

Lila stood there torn. She wasn't sure who to go to. Did she go to Connor, the twin that was awake and just went through possibly the most traumatic thing of his life? Or did she stay with her sweet Murphy who had just fucking died? Her heart was being ripped in half, she'd feel like she failed whichever one she didn't go to, even if Murphy wasn't awake. She looked to Rocco, and it was as if he could just see it written all over her face.

"You go to Connor, I'll stay with Murph, we can switch after a bit." He whispered as he wiped his eyes. Did she ever say how much she fucking loved her best friend? She hugged him, squeezing the ever loving shit out of him, happy he was here, happy he had supported her and was continuing to do so. She knew this would be hard on him too. He might not have the same bond as she did but he was their best fucking friend.

She went over to Connor, sitting on the chair and Rocco sat with Murphy. Connor heaved a sigh, everywhere fucking hurt. He was sure there wasn't a part of him that didn't hurt at this point. But it was nothing compared to the pain of losing Murphy. He had lost him, maybe only for a few minutes but Murphy had been actually fucking gone and it was the scariest feeling he had ever felt in his life. He was relieved he was back, but at the same time, no one knew yet if it would stay that way or what condition he would be in if he ever woke. He felt like he was dying, and part of him wished he fucking would just so he didn't have to feel like this anymore.

Lila grasped his hand, her jaw clenched and her nostrils flaring. Her eyes were burning with tears and Connor watched her carefully.

"You ever think that shit again and I'll kill you myself." She growled, her chest heaving as she glared at him. He was shocked by her intensity, but he shouldn't have been. It was insensitive for him to think such things knowing she would hear him, especially after what had happened to his brother.

An hour later and Connor was given the all clear to leave the bed, though he wasn't to exert himself. The doctors were baffled, he had come out of a coma to see to his dying brother, something that just didn't seem possible. How he had somehow known his brother needed him. And then he touched his brother, the boy who had flatlined, he begged for him, and the boy mysteriously came back from the dead. Lila wasn't surprised though, she knew of their bond, she knew Connor felt Murphy slip away and he would do anything to bring him the fuck back, and it seemed like he did. The nurses called it divine intervention, Lila wondered if it was or just simply the bond the two shared; one soul in two bodies. If half of the soul left, wouldn't the remaining half be able to call it back? Connor was now sat to Murphy's left side, shifting in his seat anxiously. The beeping of the machines unsettled him, a painful reminder that his brother wasn't breathing on his own anymore. Rocco was sat to Murphy's other side, head low and exhausted, sat next to the empty seat where Lila had been.

She had gotten up and scurried away though, Connor wondered where she had gone, he was worried about her. He hadn't been the only one affected by what happened to Murphy, she had been there for the whole thing too, she had felt the disconnect from his brother just as he had. She had been silent since pleading with him to get checked over and then threatening him. She seemed almost vacant, far away, he couldn't reach her. She was blocking him, and it made him feel sick. He didn't want to lose her too, not after this with Murphy. She came back after around 10 minutes, a priest in tow. Connor sat up straighter, wincing at the pain and Rocco looked at Lila curiously. The priest looked over Murphy and then Connor, his brow furrowed.

"I have to ask for permission." The priest whispered to Lila, she nodded softly, avoiding eye contact with anyone it seemed. Connor didn't know what was going on.

"Are you Mr MacManus's brother?" He asked softly as he looked at Connor. Lila was stood next to the priest looking solemn and anxious. Connor looked at the priest and gave him a nod.

"Aye father, I am. Thanks for comin'." He muttered, trying to be respectful but still hurting.

"It's quite alright child, Lila has asked me to come and pray for Murphy, to anoint him for his recovery." He said with a warm smile as he lay a hand on Lilas' shoulder.

Connor swallowed thickly, he half expected the priest to be here to read Murphy his last rites after what had happened. His heart ached at the fact Lila had gone to find the hospitals priest to anoint him. She hadn't given up, she hadn't asked for the priest to read Murphy his last rites like she thought he would slip away again. He felt a lump in his throat and he couldn't bring himself to talk, he just nodded at the priest, bowing his head as he clasped his rosary in one hand, the other holding Murphy's. Lila went and walked back over to her seat, she reached out and took Murphy's hand in her own, the other hand reaching blindly for Rocco's, who grasped just as tight. The priest stood at the end of the bed, his bible in hand as he looked over these three people who loved this young boy so much. He had heard what had happened with the boy's brother, how his sheer will for his brother to pull through had drug him out of his own coma and brought his brother back from the dead. He felt like God had great plans for these people, he could just feel it in his bones.

"In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit." The priest started. They all made the sign of the cross, Lila releasing Rocco's hand to do so before grabbing it again.

"Amen." They all muttered softly.

"The peace of the Lord be with you always." The priest continued.

"And also with you." They replied in unison.

"Brothers and sister, let us bless the Lord, who went about doing good and healing the sick. Blessed be God now and forever."

"Amen." They replied once more. The three of them watched and listened intently as the priest went about reading passages from the bible as he blessed Murphy. The priest moved around Connors side as he leaned over, anointing Murphy with the oil as he prayed.

"Lord and Father, almighty and eternal God, by your blessing you give us strength and support in our frailty: turn with kindness toward your servant, Murphy. Free him from all illness and restore him to health, so that in the sure knowledge of your goodness

he will gratefully bless your holy name. We ask this through Christ our Lord." The priest moved away after the prayer was said, and Connor almost jumped when the priest turned and anointed him too. He almost forgot he was also injured, he had been too focused on his brother.

The priest said his goodbyes after some comforting words and the three were once more alone with Murphy. Silence descended on them and Connor looked over to Lila grateful that she had done such a sweet thing for them both, he knew Murphy would have been happy about it if he were awake. She didn't look at him though, she just stared at Murphy vacantly. He wondered if she had switched off to preserve her sanity, to push her feelings down much like he always did. He didn't like it though. She had always been much more like Murphy when it came to her emotions. She would just say it how it was, react to how she felt. But now it was like she wasn't even really there. But he guessed it was probably better in the current situation than having her have a mental breakdown. He sighed and looked to his brother, his heart aching. He had to wake up, there was no other option. He had to wake up and be fucking fine. For him, for Lila, even for fucking Rocco. They all needed Murphy, Connor had faith that God wouldn't do this to him, to Lila. To take him away like this. He had so much left to give, so much life left in him. Connor couldn't believe this would be it for him, not a fucking chance. He would wake up and they would all be there to help him. That's just the way it was.


	35. Chapter 35

**More feels, but I promise things get better! I want to try and get things moving along in this chapter because I still have planssssssssss. I really feel like this fic is coming to a close soon. I'm thinking possibly four more chapters? Although I have no idea since it was supposed to be five in the first place, and now look, thirty fucking five lolololol. **

**But I'm gonna be doing the sequel, set during the first film, so dry your eyes children. :')**

**It's not over yetttttttt.**

It had been just over a week and Murphy still hadn't woken up. He was able to breathe on his own now, the night after he was anointed to be exact, and he was in a different room. It was more private and it had a joined bathroom on it. Lila and Connor had barely left his side. They slept on the chairs by his bed, Connor to his left, Lila to his right, clutching his hands, only leaving to shower when they needed to. Rocco came by every day. He brought them both breakfast, lunch and dinner, and even spare clothes. The pair were grateful for their friend, how he was making sure they ate and looked after them. He hadn't even cracked any jokes, despite his deep urge to, it was just how he was in intense situations. But he couldn't bring himself to when one of his best friends was just lay there, not waking up.

Connor and Lila had barely spoken out loud. The two of them had taken to holding Murphy's hands and holding each other's over the bed. It was the only way they felt closest to him, when their connection was at its peak. They both pleaded with Murphy mentally to wake. The doctor had told them that sometimes people in a coma could hear things and remember things. So they took to using their profound bond to try and reach him. Neither cared how desperate or needy they sounded in each other's heads, as they both heard all of what was going on. They just needed Murphy to wake the fuck up. Being connected pretty much at all times had them just communicating mentally with each other. They just seemed unable to use their voices just yet.

Lila was sure her telepathic muscles were well and truly flexed by this point, she had used them so much she had gotten a fuck tonne better at it. Connor would have been proud if he wasn't heartbroken. The only time they left Murphy's side was when one of them had to shower. They would take turns, the other staying with him. They hated it though and were always as quick as they could, because once the bond was severed, they felt so far away from him. Even Connor had a hard time feeling him out when he was on his own with him.

The priest would come by every day and say a quick prayer with them, he had taken to the pair and their comatose loved one. He didn't know what it was about them, just the very miracle that happened when Connor had woke and helped Murphy, but there was something there about the three of them, they were special, he just couldn't figure out why. Connor and Lila were grateful to the man, he provided them with comfort and hope. The prayers would lift their spirits and the priest would talk so confidently that Murphy would wake up and it would all be okay. They had to hold on to that hope, because without that, they felt like they were drowning.

They were glad they had each other, Connor didn't know how he would have handled this whole thing if Lila hadn't been there with him. He had wanted to reach out to her, to hold her, kiss her, but he didn't. They just sat on respective sides of Murphys bed gripping at his hands and pleading with him to wake up. It was hard for him, not only dealing with his own emotional trauma but the lasses too. They were raw and open in an effort to reach his twin, and this meant they felt every little thing they each felt. The girl was broken. He wasn't surprised. She had been through so much grief in her life, losing her Da, her granda and now this? Connor wasn't sure how she was still fucking standing because this with Murphy alone had him dying inside. She was strong, but she was fractured. And when Murphy woke up, because he would fucking wake up, they would both need to help piece her back together.

She hadn't laughed, hadn't smiled once, or had the usual sass coming from her mouth, not even to Rocco. She was just there, existing, hurting, and it made his heart bleed to see his radiant angel dulled down like this. He couldn't remember much of the accident, one minute they were driving, the next it was agony and fear for his brother, then nothing until he woke. He remembered hearing the screaming, someone's anguished cries, and he was too wrapped up in Murphy at the time to see it was Lila. It was only when he felt the disconnect from his brother, and he felt her, he felt her overwhelming fear at feeling the same severance of the bond. That's when he looked at her, he saw her thrashing against his best friend, screaming bloody murder as she tried so desperately to reach his brother, just like he was.

This whole thing had made him feel closer to her, even despite the fact the only physical contact they had was holding hands over Murphys bed. Mentally, they were linked as one the whole time, and in turn, it had made them even closer. It was intimate, being in each others heads almost 24/7, the only exception was when one of them showered. But they would always come right back, hold hands, and resume the connection.

Connor was healing but he still hurt like a bitch. The doctors were still surprised he was fine apart from the pain of his superficial injuries. They were sure he should have had some sort of brain damage, that he shouldn't have woken before his brother. His own head had taken a big blow when the airbag went off, smashing his head into the back of the headrest. The car was totaled, Rocco had told him. The man responsible was an 80-year-old drunk and he had killed himself before the police could get to him. Connor knew he should be angry at the man, but he forgave him. Forgiveness was a huge factor in their faith, of course, he had no choice but to do it. And he actually said a small prayer for the man's soul when he found out he had taken his own life. Lila had not been as gracious. The lass had only just returned to her faith and Connor had no doubt that this blow had weakened it once again. She had said she was happy the asshole was dead, she didn't understand how Connor could forgive him for such a thing. He just hoped that once Murphy came back to them, her faith would be restored.

She hadn't given it up completely, she had asked the priest here after all and they both prayed for Murphy, even without the priest. But he knew that it was mostly for his and his twins benefit, that she knew that their faith was one of the most important things to them so she did it for them. It only made him adore her more for putting them first like that, even though she was pissed at God for doing this to her yet again, she still prayed. Connors faith was unwavering, he didn't understand why this had happened. But he knew he wasn't supposed to understand it. So he just accepted it. It was just another thing that Lila didn't understand and it had caused them to argue a little.

It was a weird thing, to argue in each other's heads. There was no real shouting or shoving of each other like there would have been if it was verbal. They'd just glare at each other. It probably looked weird as fuck to anyone that came in. They argued a fair few times since it happened, mostly over how Lila couldn't understand how Connor could forgive the man who did it, or the fact he just didn't seem mad at God. But even with the arguments, they were closer. It felt like they'd got to know each other more than they had before, at such a deeper level. Knowing every little thought that went through each other's mind.

Connor had heard her thoughts, every single one when they were linked;

'_Murphy please wake up, we can't do this without you. We're not complete without you here.'_

'_Please fucking wake up, how am I supposed to do this without you? What about Connor? How am I supposed to get him through this? He'd die without you.'_

'_Connors being a dick again, if you don't wake up I just might throttle him.'_

'_Remember the day you came home from work with some flowers for me? And Connor accused you of trying to show him up and you guys started slapping at each other? I fucking miss it Murphy, come back to us.'_

'_The guy who did this to you killed himself today. I'm glad he did, he doesn't deserve to breathe while you're like this. Connor forgave him though, of course he did. No doubt you will too when you wake up.'_

'_I feel like I'm dying without you love, I feel so empty. Like part of my soul is just missing.'_

'_The first day we met, when I was soaked at the bar, I regret not talking to you, not asking you to sit with me. I was just so shocked and in a bad mood. I thought you were handsome though. Connor creeped me out though, staring at me all worried. He looked like a hot serial killer.' _That one had earned a weak snort from the lighter haired twin but she still couldn't bring herself to smile. It was like she had no spark left inside.

Rocco was sat next to Connor as they spoke in hushed tones, Lila didn't care, she wasn't focused on them. She was holding Murphy's hand in her own tightly as she spoke to him once more in her head.

'_I miss you Murphy. I miss your smile. Your real smile where your cute little canines poke out, it lights up your whole face. You're such a big kid sometimes, always making me laugh. I miss your voice, how you call me m'girl or love, how you tell me you love me like a hundred times a day and make me feel like I'm turning into jelly. I miss the way you look at Connor, like he's made out of gold or something. How it's all over your face how much he means to you, your lifeline, your everything. I miss you two bickering about everything and anything, I miss your colourful insults to him, they always make me laugh. I miss waking to find you taking pictures of me sleeping like a creeper, only to catch you and make you blush. I miss it all, just wake the fuck up so we can go back to all of that, please?'_

She felt Connor squeeze her hand and she looked to him, she didn't even realise tears were streaming down her face until she saw how blurry he had gotten. Rocco wasn't there now and the lighter twin was looking at her sadly.

"He'll wake up." He said firmly, actually speaking to her. She just blinked at him, wiping at her tears with her free hand.

"He has te wake up." He whispered sounding unsure of himself, furrowing his brow at his sleeping brother. These moments of doubt came often, for the pair of them. Because even though it had been just over a week, it felt like a lifetime that Murphy had lay there, not able to open his eyes or talk to them. Feeling so fucking far away.

The pair of them looked a mess, everyone that came in to check on Murphy and Connor always looked at them with pity. They barely slept, only when they passed out from sheer exhaustion in the chairs, hands still clasping Murphys with their head lay on the bed. They looked gaunt and had dark rings around their eyes, and despite the showers, they hadn't cared for themselves in any other way. Lilas unruly hair was a mess and she had stuffed it up into a bun and not touched it. She was sure once she took the hair tie out it would just stay up there with how knotted it would be. They were exhausted and weak, emotionally drained. But they kept going for Murphy.

An hour later and Connor was in the shower whilst Lila sat by Murphy's side. She nibbled her lower lip and glanced to the door. She needed to feel closer to Murphy, he felt so far away it was hurting her. She stood up, laying in bed beside him, mindful of the IVs in his arm and the monitors he was hooked up to. She successfully lay on her side wrapped around him, her face in the crook of his neck as she clung to him desperately. She started sobbing, her heart aching something fierce as she breathed in his beautiful Murphy scent.

"Please wake up Murphy, I need you, Connor needs you." She pleaded weakly, her body shaking from the sobs.

Connor opened the joining door to the bathroom, dressed in clean clothes and his hair still damp. He stopped for a minute, his heart seizing up seeing Lila attached to Murphy sobbing helplessly. It hurt him so much to see her in so much pain. It was bad enough going through it himself but to feel her pain and see it, it made his pain even worse. Suddenly, a soft moan came from the darker twin and Lilas' eyes widened, mirroring Connor who suddenly tensed, frozen in place. Lila was scared to move, like it was all a dream and she saw his hand twitch ever so slightly.

"Did he just…?" Connor asked, hopeful and confused all at the same time, like they had waited for this moment for so long they didn't think it would ever come. Lila sat up fast, glancing to Connor as he walked towards them quickly. She gripped Murphy's face in her hands staring at him.

"Murphy? Please wake up! We're here, Connors here, please!" She begged, eliciting another groan from him as his eyes fluttered. He was trying to open them but seemed unable to.

Connor ran to the door frantically shouting for a nurse before he ran back in and rested his hand on his brother's chest.

"Murph? I'm here aye? Open yer eyes _deartháir_ (brother)!" He demanded firmly. The doctors and nurses came rushing in and Connor and Lila were moved and the door was suddenly closed on them as they checked him over. Connor wrapped an arm around her shoulder, the first real contact they had since the first day they were in here. Lila melted into his side, sobbing tears of relief as she watched on, trying to get a glimpse of him through the window of the door. Connor was crying too, feeling incredulous that this twin was finally back with them. He could feel him stronger now, almost like normal and he knew Lila was feeling it too. God had answered their prayers and their dear Murphy had come back to them.

The door was opened as the nurses left, telling them they could go in and see him. Lila was suddenly nervous. The last time they had spoken, he had yelled at her, he was mad and accused her of trying to break the boys apart. She hesitated, and Connor frowned and all but dragged her in there with his arm around her. He knew she was worried Murphy might still be mad. But that day, after they had gotten to work, Murphy had been beating himself up for saying that to her, for shouting at her in that way. Connor knew he hadn't meant it and he knew deep down Lila knew that too. But he also understood his words had stung quite a bit.

Murphy was propped up in the bed, his eyes blinking blearily as the two walked in. His eyes were no longer swollen shut but they were bruised to hell. Connor let go of her and rushed right over, and incredulous laugh falling from his lips, so fucking relieved to see his brother awake.

"Fuckin' hell Murph." He cried, taking his hand and squeezing it as he fought his tears. Murphy frowned at him, tilting his head a little.

"M'sorry, who are you?" He asked warily, making Connors' stomach fall out of his ass. He dropped his brother's hand and took a step back feeling like his heart had been torn out all over again. Lila was stood off to the side and when she heard those awful words leave Murphy's mouth, a choked sob came out and she covered her mouth.

Murphy hadn't seen the girl and when he heard her he looked to her worried.

"Fuckin' hell, I was only messin' wit' ye!" He frowned, looking worried and feeling guilty as hell as he looked at how devastated the pair were. Lilas' heart stopped, how the fuck could he make jokes at a time like this? She shouldn't have been surprised.

"The fuck Murphy?! How could ye do that te us?!" Connor yelled, tears falling down his cheeks as he glared down at his brother. Murphy's eyes widened as he saw the state of him, glancing to their girl and seeing how rough she looked too. He had no clue what had happened when he was down for the count. He didn't know why they were so upset.

"I feel like I missed somethin'..." He muttered, glancing between the two as he looked confused.

"You fucking died Murphy! You died and I…" Lila sobbed, leaning against the wall to support herself so she didn't just keel over and die right there. Murphy had given her a heart attack saying that shit to his brother.

Murphy's eyes bugged out of his head, looking to Connor for confirmation, Connor just gave him the most heartbreaking look and he knew instantly why they were so upset. He couldn't imagine being in Connor shoes. To have Connor fucking die on him like that. Connor was still mad, upset at his words and the whole situation in general. So he reached out, gripping the sides of Murphy's face and learnt his forehead on his brothers. And then, he mentally recalled everything that had happened from the moment he woke up when Murphy had flatlined. How he had fought and screamed, how Lila was wailing like she was on fucking fire as she desperately tried to get to him. Every fucking thing that happened, he pushed onto Murphy and Murphy felt his heart shatter over and fucking over again.

Experiencing Connors memories like that was intense for the over emotional twin. He felt his pain and anguish just as if it were his own, as if it was Connor that had died, and he was the one heartbroken. He saw just what it did to Lila, how broken she had become. He wasn't just shown the events like he was a fly on the wall for the whole thing, he felt every single thing that Connor felt, and since his brother had been connected with Lila since Murphy had been brought back, he felt everything she felt too. When Connor moved away, Murphy looked up at him, tears streaming down his face and he tried to will away the lump in his throat.

"_Deartháir, tá brón orm. Ní raibh a fhios agam _(Brother, I'm sorry. I didn't know)." He whispered, his voice full of pain. Connor had not really intended on showing Murphy what had happened, because he knew how sensitive he was and it would be better if he hadn't experienced it with them, but what he had said, how he could just joke around like that, like what happened wasn't a big deal, it cut him deep. He needed his brother to know just how bad things had gotten, how he actually lost his other half for a moment and how much it terrified him.

Lila watched on, she was feeling numb now, she felt like she had exhausted her feelings and her energy and she felt ready to curl up into a ball and disappear forever. Connor sat down in the chair to Murphys left and Murphy looked to the girl. She looked sickly almost, paler than usual with purple rings around her eyes. Her hair was in a wild bun and bits were sticking out everywhere and her eyes were puffy and red. It made his heart ache seeing her this way, all he could hear in his mind now were her anguished cries as she tried to get to him, his brother yelling ferociously as he tried to fight the staff. He had died. He had actually fucking died and he had no idea how he had managed to come back just from his brother touching him. He could only chalk it up to God, that he had a purpose and he had not yet fulfilled it. But he would do whatever God asked of him for giving him this second chance. To give him more time with his twin and their girl. He felt every ounce of their pain, and he knew they wouldn't be able to cope if he hadn't of come back. He knew he wouldn't either if he lost one of them.

He reached out and grasped Connors' hand and his brother held it tightly, wiping his eyes with his other hand as he looked at his brother, still in disbelief he was awake and talking, so fine he was cracking fucking jokes.

"Lila, _mo chailín milis _(my sweet girl), c'mere." He rasped, holding his other hand out to her. Her heart clenched that he wanted her there, that he wasn't still mad or thought those horrible things about her, she didn't think she could cope if he did, not after all this. She fucking needed him more than she needed air to breathe. She inhaled deeply, pushing herself off the wall as she walked over. She was going to sit in the chair but as Murphy took her hand, he tugged on it and made her sit in the bed facing him.

His sad eyes searched her face, looking her over and seeing just how tired she was. He stroked her cheek lovingly, looking pained almost. She leant into his touch, her eyes fluttering closed and he swallowed thickly.

"I love ye Lila, and I love ye too Connor." He said softly, glancing from the girl to his brother who hadn't taken his eyes off him, it was like Connor thought if he looked away Murphy would just disappear.

"I love you too." Lila whispered, opening her eyes as she lay her hand over his heart, feeling it beating, it soothed her.

"I love ye too Murph, always will." Connor said softly and giving his hand a squeeze. Murphy took a deep breath, just enjoying being close to them both as he tried to process everything he had been through, what Connor had shown him, it was a lot to take in, especially since he always had a hard time separating his feelings from Connors and now Lilas too. He had to stuff them in a box somewhere so he knew he wasn't the one who actually went through that, he was the one who died, not Connor.

"So… I guess I should thank ye for bringin' me back from the dead Connor. Should I start te call ye Jesus?" He asked with a rueful smile, looking at his brother. Connor blinked at him for a minute before he let out a laugh, unable to help himself. Murphy was alive, he was there and he was fine. He could laugh, he could feel the joy and relief from that and fucking enjoy it without feeling bad. Lila looked at Murphy and shook her head with a smile, she was actually smiling for the first time since it happened and Connor couldn't help but grin at the glorious sight before him, the smile he had missed so fucking much.

"Ye think I should start chargin' people for healin' them?" Connor asked with a smirk, slipping back into the easy banter he and his brother usually had now he was back and he could feel him full force again. Murphy snorted at him, making Lilas heart swell in her chest at the sound of something she never thought she'd hear again. It had been a terrible ordeal, and she knew it was far from over. Murphy still had to recover, as did Connor, but the emotional wounds would take more time than any broken bone or other injuries. What they had been through was traumatic, and it wouldn't just go away overnight, no matter how many jokes were made. But they had each other, and as long as they stuck together, they could help each other through this. They'd make it out just fine, just like they always did. God had plans for them all, that much was clear, and now Murphy was back. They would enjoy every fucking day that came their way, never take it for granted anymore, they would make every second fucking count.


	36. Chapter 36

**Murphy gets to come home and the boys try to help Lila come back to them.**

It had been two weeks since Murphy woke up, two fucking weeks, and it was hard on all of them. Because Murphy was now awake, the doctor only allowed one of them to sleep there with him. Visitors weren't allowed to sleep there full stop, but when the doctor told them both to go home for the first time, Murphy almost set the fucking place on fire with them all in it, wanting to burn the place to the ground. So as a compromise, one of them could stay overnight, the other would have to go home and come back during visiting hours.

Murphy had felt incredibly guilty, because no matter how much he loved his girl, it was obvious who he was going to pick. Connor wouldn't leave Murphy's side for a second, not after all that had happened, and Murphy needed to be close to him after Connor had let him see and feel everything that had happened when he was out of it. He was worried he had upset her, being put in a situation where he had to pick his brother over her, he felt like he had betrayed her somehow. She got it though, she wasn't stupid enough to think he was going to pick her, as soon as the doctor said it, she knew it would have been Connor and if Murphy had not been able to make up his mind, she would have told him to pick Connor anyway.

She knew they needed each other, they were both very vulnerable and she wouldn't ever dream of splitting them up. It hurt her, of course it did, having to go home every night alone, to an empty apartment and an empty bed, but she dealt with it. The first few nights were the worst and she hadn't been able to sleep. And when she had returned to the hospital to see Murphy in the mornings, she had looked rough, making it clear she hadn't slept and had been crying. It only made the boy's guilt increase about the whole thing. Being unable to be there for her when she needed them most, for her to be suffering through this alone when they had each other. Connor had asked Rocco to stay with her around the third day, and of course he said yes. Rocco was so happy Murphy was okay, and he too was still reeling from all that had happened, to witness Murphy literally die right in front of them.

The girl was troubled, the boys could see it, fucking feel it, and even Rocco could tell she was trying to deal with shit and failing. She barely spoke now, only if she was spoken to, but most times she would answer with a nod or shake of her head. When Rocco went home with her, he would try and make her laugh, being his usual self, but she would only give him a weak smile, not laugh like she usually would. Her best friend was worried about her. She didn't really feel like Lila anymore, and even the boys had noticed. When she was at the hospital, Connor would watch her carefully, he would see how she avoided eye contact, and keep touching either one of them to a minimum. She had blocked them both every time she was there, successfully too since she had gotten better with her abilities with all she had done with Connor. Murphy hated that she blocked him, but he daren't bring it up, since it just reminded him of the horrible words he had said to her before the accident. That could have been the last time he had ever spoken to her and he had accused her of trying to cause a fight between him and his brother, he was still feeling guilty as hell about it. '_Ye got what ye want girl, aye?! Got us fightin', is this what ye fuckin' wanted?!'_

When the four of them were sat in the hospital room, Rocco would tell funny stories trying to make her laugh, Connor would even join in or Murphy, but they never succeeded. Connor had been able to successfully put his own feelings in a box, as always. Locking that box labeled 'Murphy's death' up tight and never to be fucking opened lest it eat him alive. Murphy was here and he was okay, there was no need to even go there in his mind, he'd rather just forget about it. But he was worried about Lila, seeing her so vacant, not being able to feel her. The whole thing had done a number on her, and unlike himself, she wasn't able to just ignore what had happened, to stuff her shit in a box and get on with life like normal. The only way she was coping was to just shut down completely, and he was scared she'd never fucking come back.

It was killing Murphy to watch her. She would sit on the chair like she wasn't really there, not taking part in conversation, not even reaching out to his hand anymore. When he reached out to her she would come to him, but she still seemed so far away. He knew just how bad things had been, he had felt it when Connor showed him, and he knew she wasn't dealing with it well in the slightest. He just hoped once he got home, things would be better, the three of them finally together.

He had finally gotten the okay to go home, he was out of the woods so to speak in life-threatening shit, he just had to deal with his beat-up body and broken leg. But he could cope with that, just as his brother was doing with his broken arm. His own arm was out of the sling now, the sprain gone thankfully, and the stitches in the gash on his head had been removed. He had been itching to leave, he hated being cooped up in this small fucking room with doctors and nurses prodding at him a billion times a day. He hated being away from Lila every night, worried sick if she was alright, if she was sleeping or not. According to Rocco she barely slept anymore, and most nights he would wake up hearing her crying in bed. Connor was excited to get his brother home, for the three of them to finally be together properly once again so he could watch over not only his twin, but his lass too. He would do whatever it took to bring her back to her former self and he hoped Murphy being home would fucking help with that.

Rocco had driven them home, telling them he'd be around at dinner time with some food for them all, and after saying their goodbyes, the boys went off inside the apartment building. Murphy had crutches and Connor was right by his side, a hand on his back as they got inside the elevator. They didn't speak, they were nervous. It felt weird now between them and Lila with her being so distant. It was almost like they were unsure how to act around her. When they opened their door and walked in, she was making the bed. She turned to look at them, giving them a weak smile before continuing her task. Murphy's heart dropped. There was no hug, no kiss, not even any words, just a weak ass smile that was more of a grimace in his opinion.

The place was spotless and smelt like bleach, Rocco had warned the boys she just cleaned whenever she wasn't at the hospital, how she would mutter to herself that the place had to be just right for Murphy's return. Murphy and Connor looked to each other, worried as they shucked off their coats. Murphy propped his crutches against the wall, and he limped over to her as she smoothed out the bedding quietly. He swallowed thickly as he reached out to her, taking her hand hesitantly, afraid she would bolt or something.

She flinched, seemingly not even noticing he was there and she looked to him with wide eyes. He felt a stab in his heart when he caught a quick glimpse of the raw pain hidden in her blue eyes, but then just as quick as it was there, it was gone, as she successfully shut down once again.

"Missed ye m'girl." He frowned, pulled her to him. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, burying his nose into her hair and letting the cinnamon scent soothe his heart from everything that had happened. She was tense, and she just stood there not hugging back for a moment, it only made the pain inside of his chest increase. She was so fucking far away from him and it felt like he was dying all over again.

"Please love, come back te me." He whispered pleadingly, tearfully, almost mirroring her own words that she had said to him when he hadn't woken up yet.

He heard her take a shaky breath and then he felt her arms wrap around his middle. He clenched his jaw, fighting the onslaught of tears at the feel of her finally hugging him, and he squeezed her tighter. He felt her body shaking and then he heard it, her small broken sobs as she clutched to him tighter. It broke his heart, but he was happy she was crying, because it meant she wasn't just empty like she had been. She was allowing herself to feel for the first time since he had woken up. Connor walked over slowly, he had been watching from near the door and he could feel his own tears welling up, feeling his shared pain with the girl when Murphy was still out of it. He came up behind her, encasing her in his arms and his brother and he held them tightly. The three of them just a tangle of bodies for a moment as the girl's sobs increased. Murphy was crying along with her, unable to stop himself at hearing her pain behind her cries, and it was taking all of Connor's sanity not to cry, trying to be the strong one of the three like he always was.

They stayed that way until Lila had cried it out, Connor being the first to move away. He kissed the top of her head, squeezing his brother's arm, before moving off and going to lay on the bed. He was exhausted, physically and mentally. Murphy held her for a moment longer, and when he moved away, he noticed she wouldn't look at him. He took her face in his hands and tilted her face up, giving her no choice. She blinked her tear stained eyes up at him, looking at him like she was so scared he wasn't even real, like it was all a dream and Murphy was still back at the hospital, not awake. He swallowed hard and rested his forehead on hers.

"It'll all be alright m'girl, ye'll see. M'here now, not goin' anywhere." He tried to soothe her, stroking her hair. She closed her eyes and nodded.

She knew he was okay, he was there, he was talking, he was alive. But she was finding it so hard to deal with that moment he had flatlined. The blinding terror that had gripped her soul so hard she feared she would be following along right after him. She felt a little better though after crying, she had stuffed it all down just to get by, just to preserve her sanity for each night she was apart from the pair of them. But now they were home, she could try and sort through her emotions and just being around them, having them hold her like they did, it eased some of the tightness in her chest.

Connor cleared his throat and the pair turned to look at him, now sat up in the bed.

"C'mon, family meetin'." He said seriously, scooting back to lean against the headboard. Lila blinked at him for a moment but she watched as Murphy moved over to the bed sitting to Connors right. She heaved a sigh and went over, sitting in front of the pair. It almost felt like she was about to be scolded by her parents. She noticed the boys were sat so close their arms were touching, she wondered if they did it on purpose or if it was the subconscious need to touch each other after everything that had happened.

"Now, I know we've been through hell the past few weeks Lila, fuck knows I was right there wit' ye, but I'll not be havin' ye withdrawin' from us. I'm not stupid, yer shuttin' down so ye don't have te deal wit' it, but sweetheart, it's goin' te eat ye alive if ye don't sort through it, aye? If ye have te cry, then ye fuckin' cry, if ye need te cling te Murphy like a wee babe, then ye fuckin' do it. None o' us are gonna judge ye for doin' whatever ye need te in order to cope lass. Me and Murphy had our time in the hospital te work through it, but ye've been here wit'out us, and it's clear it's taken its toll on ye. So now's yer chance to let it all out." He said sternly, always the one to protect and care for them.

Connor had his chance to make peace with what happened. Every night at the hospital he would sleep in the bed with his brother, gripping him tightly. He could breathe in his scent, feel his heart under his hand, he could feel him mentally as their connection became strong once more. But poor Lila hadn't had that chance to make peace with what happened, to see properly that Murphy was in fact okay. Because he knew just as she did, it felt surreal that he was there. But Lila was here every night with only Rocco to keep her company, in the bed alone, she had withdrawn so much she barely even held the lad's hand, and that was only when he had given her his usual Murphy puppy eyes. But they were all back together now, and Connor wasn't about to watch her get further and further away from them, because they fucking needed her. They both needed her to just deal with it in any way she needed so that she could go back to being sassy Lila, their sweet girl they loved so much.

Murphy hadn't said a word, he already knew his brother was planning on talking to her because they had spoken about it. Murphy felt somewhat guilty she had switched off like this because he had fucking died. He knew it wasn't his fault, the whole thing had been way out of his control, but to see how broken she was, it really hurt him. Lila blushed embarrassed and looked to her hands, it felt like Connor was calling her out. She had detached herself from everything, trying to push it out of her mind and not think about it, because when she did, it just replayed over and over in her mind like a horror movie on a loop. She knew Murphy was safe, he was right there looking at her, but its like something inside of her was still stuck on the fact he had died. She had experienced a lot of death in her life, and she knew better than anyone that life could be short, that anything could fucking happen. And this, this was like a rude awakening, and that at any point, the boys could get taken away from her, and there wasn't a fucking thing she could do about it. She was scared, more than scared even, and she didn't know how to deal with the lack of control over the situation. So she had resorted to going to autopilot so she didn't have to deal with it at all.

Of course the boys picked up on it, she had blocked them at first and she knew they would have felt it. But then being numb became so second nature to her she didn't even have to block them because there was just nothing there anymore. But now, with both boys sat there staring into her soul, with Connors words basically calling her out, she could feel the fractures form on the protective shell she had cocooned herself in, as if the boys themselves were chipping away at it piece by piece. She knew she needed to let it out, she had so much hidden away inside of her that she had been trying to stuff so far down, and it was trying to reemerge. Her defense was to shove it all the way back down, but she knew Connor was right. Because she had lost a part of herself in doing so, and if she continued, she wasn't sure she'd ever be able to come back.

And so, she listened to the twin with the most authority, the twin who always looked out for them, who always knew what was best, even it if was something that wasn't pleasant. She cried. She sobbed for hours on end, sandwiched between them both as they muttered soothing words to her and held her. Murphy had cried right along with her, feeling every ounce of her pain as the dam broke and they were once again connected. It hurt him so deeply to feel her and see her this way, to know it was over him. He was overwhelmed by the intensity of her love for him that this whole thing would do this to her. Even Connor struggled to keep his shit under wraps as he held her, watching his twin and his lass cry like this, and he took some of his own advice, crying with them and letting it out. Because if they didn't, they'd never be able to move on from the horror that the past few weeks had been for them both. They all cried until there was nothing left, and they passed out in bed from exhaustion, being worn out. But they had felt better, they had let all of their heartbreak out, their grief, and now they could move on to getting better and just living life again.


	37. Chapter 37

**Connor has nightmares and Murphy's sexually frustrated.**

**Intense Murphy goodness ahead.**

A few days had passed since the darker twin had returned home and things had been intense for the three of them. Dealing with something so traumatic was hard for all of them and they were helping each other through it, whilst trying to deal with their own take on it. Connor and Lila had gone through the whole thing together, but with different perspectives. Connor from the brother's point of view, the devout Catholic point of view. Lila from the lover's point of view, from someone whose faith had once again wavered in the moment of hardship. Murphy though, his take on the whole thing was a unique one. It had happened _to_ him after all. He hadn't been there to watch it as it happened, to offer a helping hand, to break down or fucking murder someone like he knew he would have if it had been Connor that died. He had been down for the count, and he only knew what happened through the memories Connor had pushed onto him. Connor really hadn't wanted to resort to that, Murphy was a sensitive soul, he took on everyone's fucking pain and Connor knew it would be so much easier for the boy to not have known that pain at all. But with Murphy cracking jokes, Connor knew he just really didn't understand it from their point of view. He had to experience it with them so he could see just how serious it was.

So Murphy was dealing with memories that weren't his own, feelings that weren't his own. He was glad Connor had shown him, let him feel, because it gave him much needed perspective on the whole thing that he wouldn't have had otherwise. It helped him when he needed to be there for his brother or their girl. There had been plenty of tears the past few days, mainly Lilas since Connor was compartmentalising shit again. Murphy found it rich that his twin was telling Lila she had to let it out when he himself was stuffing it away. But he also knew the pair were different. Lila was emotional anyway, more like him in that way than his brother, whereas Connor didn't know any better, this was how he dealt with things. They needed to deal with their shit in the way they usually did to get through it. If Connor started acting like Murphy to get through this, it might mess him up just as much as it had Lila when she tried to act like Connor. They had to stay true to themselves and handle it their own way.

It wasn't that Connor was pushing it away or not dealing with it. He had his moments, fuck knows he had his moments. He broke down a couple of times and even had a screaming match with Lila at one point just because Murphy choked on his food. It wasn't her fault, of course it wasn't, and Murphy just inhaled it, far too greedy after missing her wonderful cooking. But the fear of losing his twin had seeped so far into his bones that a mere fucking cough on his food had snapped him and he had blamed the girl. Murphy had been mortified, it had given him a taste of his own medicine from every time he had shouted at the girl and Connor had looked on horrified. He knew what that felt like now. But before he could jump in to defend her, the lass had lost her shit, screaming back at him and suddenly the food was being fucking flung around the place like monkeys throwing shit at each other at the zoo. Murphy blinked at them, wondering what fucking planet he was on when he was the one sat there calm as he watched them, their chests heaving as they glared at each other. He told them to cut it right out or he'd willingly go and sleep on Rocco's couch, and that shut them right up and they cleaned the loft together. Luckily they hadn't shouted at each other since.

The air in the loft was tense, the whole thing still loomed over them but they were getting through it one day at a time. Murphy felt a little better each day and that was helping things. He tried his best to be himself, cracking jokes, being sassy, playing pranks, and he knew it was making the pair feel better at seeing him being normal. He wasn't so much traumatised by what happened, he hadn't been there, he was just dealing with the after-effects of it, to see the two people he loved feeling this way and knowing exactly what they had been through. He was being strong for them both, he still cried of course, whenever Lila broke down and clung onto him like he might float away, when he felt her raw pain. He cried with her. And then there were Connors fucking nightmares.

After Murphy had woke in the hospital and Connor was allowed to stay with him, the lighter haired boy hadn't had any nightmares, he had been able to sleep wrapped around his brother and that was enough to soothe his subconscious when he slept that he was fine. But since the first night being back here, with Lila in between them as was their usual routine. It seemed that Connors brain short fucking circuited.

_Lila woke to Connor squirming in bed, muttering something. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, looking down at him, his brow furrowed deeply. She jumped out of her skin when he started fucking yelling for his brother, despite still being asleep and he was thrashing around. Her heart sank, she remembered this fucking well, she had witnessed it. The moment his brother flatlined, the moment he himself had woke from his coma and fought so fucking hard to get to his brother. It felt like her heart split in half watching him._

"_The fuck?" She heard Murphy mutter sleepily behind her, hearing the commotion._

"_Connor, wake up, it's a dream." She frowned as she shook him, trying to get him to wake. Murphy sat up behind her looking on worried. Lila tried to grip his face and suddenly he grabbed her arms and she was almost airborne for a moment, hitting the floor with a pained grunt on her back. _

"_Fuckin' Christ Connor!" She heard Murphy yell before he slid off the bed to get to her. _

_The lighter haired twin shot up in bed, looking around frantically as his chest heaved. His eyes settled on his twin helping Lila sit up, watching as she grimaced. She wasn't too hurt, it might bruise but she could deal with it. She should have known not to wake him. Wasn't there a saying about waking someone from a nightmare? Murphy shot his brother a look, he knew he hadn't meant to but he was still pissed off he had just chucked the wee girl off the bed._

"_The fuck happened?" Connor muttered looking confused as he looked at the pair of them. Lila blinked at him as Murphy helped her stand._

"_Ye fuckin' shoved her off the bed ye dick." Murphy huffed, shooting him a scowl. Connor blanched and he looked her over, as if assessing for damage. _

"_I'm fine Connor, you were having a nightmare." She whispered, not wanting him to feel bad. He was only sorting through his shit subconsciously after all._

_The second night Lila had ended up with a punch to the jaw, she hadn't tried to wake him this time but he was fighting off the people holding him back in his sleep, so apparently, she was a good target. Murphy had almost fucking killed his brother, Connor almost fucking let him. But she was having none of it, she knew he hadn't meant to hurt her. That was the night she made the effort to fucking try and fix it.,_

"_Move up Murph." She stated firmly as she came back to the bed after icing her face. She had demanded the brothers stay in bed and not help her, she had just been clocked in the jaw and they were yelling at each other, she needed some peace. After she had yelled at them both to shut the fuck up, they sat silently in bed watching her like scolded children._

"_What?" Murphy asked confused, his twin giving her an equally puzzled look. She heaved a sigh and rolled her eyes, going to Murphy side of the bed and looking at them._

"_Connor needs you, he needs to feel you so he knows you're okay. Just like it was at the hospital. I don't wanna get fucking hit again, so move the fuck up and let him hold you before I kill you both." She said firmly, giving them both a look. Connor blushed, he actually blushed because the lass knew exactly what he needed, he knew it too but he had been too stubborn and embarrassed to admit it. Murphy looked to his brother cautiously, feeling him out, seeing if that was indeed what he wanted, what he needed. The crimson colour of his face told him it was. He didn't take the piss, he didn't embarrass his brother, he just slid over, laying facing the girl as she got in bed next to him. _

_Connor wrapped his arm around Murphys middle, his hand over his heart like he had done at the hospital and he could feel the calm wash over his brother. Murphy felt stupid he hadn't suggested it himself. Lila smiled at Murphy and he smiled right back, she was such a clever little thing, always knowing what they needed and never being afraid to vocalize it, even if they were themselves. He leant forward and kissed her lips sweetly, and she snuggled into him._

That was how they slept now, although once Connors' brain worked once more they all knew Lila would be back in the middle. Connor missed her, he missed holding her like he used to, but his mind needed Murphy more at night when he was asleep. The fact he had hurt her, twice, it had eaten him alive. He wasn't about to go for a third fucking round with her because he was sure his twin would actually kill him that time if he did. Murphy had been extra creative after Lilas hit to the jaw, with insults thrown his brother's way. Murphy had always had a way with words, even when he was being rude or insulting. Connor was sure in all of Murphy's years he was just compiling the best curse words and insults into a fucking book. He almost snorted at himself when he wondered if that was what Murphy was writing. A book of Irish insults. He wouldn't put it past the fucker. Although he knew he wasn't, or Murphy would have been more than eager to show it to him.

Lilas plan for Murphy to sleep next to him had helped him tremendously. He felt a lot better and things seemed like they were starting to go back to normal somewhat. It gave him hope that they would get through this, as hard as it was. They had been through the wringer, and they had to deal with the aftermath of it, the feelings that were left over. And with each passing day, the clouds started to part and the sun started to shine once more. The only dark cloud now looming over them was Murphy's sexual fucking frustration. Connor felt his own of course, but he could deal with it. The lass had been far too upset to do anything of the sort and the boys had only pecked her lips sweetly since they'd both returned. But Murphy being Murphy, his own frustration was making him antsy and angry. Seeing her prance around in nothing but his shirt. Waking up with her pressed against him. But she never made a move, and when his hands would wander in the morning, she would stop him, giving him an apologetic smile before climbing out of bed. He knew it was his injuries, he knew she didn't want to hurt him. He still had that stupid cast on his leg and although his cuts and bruises were healing, his body was fucking littered in them. He had weeks yet of the cast being on and he thought he'd go out of his damn mind if the lass didn't touch him.

His brother was as cool as a cucumber, of course the fucker was. Murphy, in a moment of desperation, had even accused him of sleeping with the lass behind his back. To which Connor kindly told him that, **One**; he was in a relationship with the girl just as much as Murphy was and it wouldn't be behind his back, he could fuck her whenever he wanted and wherever he wanted. **Two**; they were never away from Murphy so it would be pretty difficult to do, just sneaking around having sex when he was always watching, and **Three**; Well three was just a smack around the ear for good measure at being such a dick. Murphy knew he was being ridiculous, he just needed her, fucking badly.

That's why he was currently sat up in bed, propped up by pillows against the headboard, scowling at the lass after she had once again rebuffed him. Connor was sat on the couch watching some stupid fucking movie, he'd had enough of his brother whining after their lass like a dog in fucking heat. Lila sat there on the bed giving Murphy a firm look as he glared at her.

"Murphy, stop it." She sighed, she felt bad, she wanted him just as much, she wanted them both, but she didn't want to hurt him.

"No Lila, I ain't made o' fuckin' glass. Jesus Christ, me legs in a cast, not me cock!" He huffed at her. Connor snorted loudly from where he was sat and he shook his head. His brother had no shame in practically begging for her it seemed. It was far too amusing. Murphy's glare turned to his brother for a moment before he looked back to Lila. He was horrified to see she looked like she was struggling not to laugh at him.

"Oh, I'm fuckin' glad me discomfort is bringin' ye both fuckin' joy!" He scowled, crossing his arms over his broad chest and brooding something fierce.

Connor knew, he knew the girl was going to give in because Murphy was acting like a little child and she could never deny them anything. He wasn't about to get involved. The pair hadn't had her separately yet, and he knew after what they had been through it might be nice to have her to themselves once each before together as usual. So he'd just watch his fucking movie and leave them to it. He wasn't desperate like his fucking brother, he would get his time with her. Lila blinked at Murphy as he sulked and she fought the urge to laugh.

"Murph, I know you aren't made of glass, I just don't want you overexerting yourself." She said softly, reaching to take his hand. He swallowed thickly as he looked at her, not being able to stay mad when she looked so worried about him.

"Then I won't, I'll just sit here and let ye do all the work." He smirked devilishly at her, quirking a brow. Her cheeks flushed crimson and she smiled to herself. He always had a way of making her feel like a schoolgirl.

"Please m'girl, fuckin' want ye." He pleaded softly, looking at her through his lashes all coy like, he'd learnt she liked it when he did that. It turned out he was pulling all his best moves on the girl. Connor almost laughed to himself as he turned the volume up a little on the tv. Desperate little fuck his brother was.

Lila looked at him, her cheeks flushed as she nibbled her lower lip. It wasn't like she didn't want him, of course she did. The want for the boys never seemed to fucking end and here Murphy was begging her. She couldn't say no to him, she never fucking could. A sly smirk spread across his face when he felt her acceptance over the situation and he knew he'd gotten his own way, she almost laughed at the absurdity of the whole thing. He took her wrist and pulled her onto his lap so she was straddling him. His whole body was thrumming with excited energy, it had been a fucking while and he couldn't wait. He took a minute though to appreciate her beautiful face, her flushed cheeks and blue eyes with her pupils blown. He always loved the telltale signs of her arousal, how he didn't just feel it from her but how it was written all over her face. She was watching him carefully as his hands slid up the outside of her thighs teasingly, coming to rest on her ass cheeks. He'd missed this with her, missed touching her soft skin, feeling her on top of him. He was already painfully hard just from the anticipation alone.

Finally, it was like the elastic band had snapped, all resolve had gone from her as he stared her down with those brooding smoldering eyes. She leant forward and kissed him almost ferociously and he moaned appreciatively into the kiss. When he and Lila were together, it was an all-engulfing fire that would burn the world to ashes with their desire. It was different with the lighter twin, he was in control, calculated, teasing to the point she would beg for mercy. Although Murphy liked to tease, it was teasing him just as much so he would always cave much sooner. He would much rather give into it. He was needy, as was Lila, so when the pair of them were like this, it was hard and fast, desperate to the point of fucking insanity. None of them really in control of themselves, none of them able to stop.

He tugged her shirt off her head before attaching his lips on hers once more, kissing her desperately as he ground up against her, his hands squeezing her perfect breasts. He was only in his boxers and she took great pleasure in touching any skin she fucking could. The man had shoulders made of steel. For some reason, Murphy had this thing where he liked to actually rip her panties off her. She wondered if it was because he was just too desperate to bother with taking the time and effort to remove them, or if maybe his goal was for her to end up with no underwear so she'd have to walk around commando. Either way, her panties once again were ruined, somewhere in the loft after Murphy had flung them, she couldn't bring it in herself to care anymore. She'd come to accept the fact she should just buy some cheap ass panties so it didn't matter when he ripped them.

He lifted her hips, trying to tug his own underwear down and she helped him, letting his cock spring free. They didn't bother to remove them all the way, there was no need. The grip on her hips tightened and he pulled her down to sink onto his cock, a loud moan of relief leaving his lips like he was finally fucking home, he finally got his fix of her. She gasped when he stretched her out, holding onto his shoulders for dear life. He had the decency to stay still for a moment, letting her adjust, he could feel how tight she was, it was like her body had forgotten them altogether. And he couldn't have that one fucking bit. One hand was splayed on the bottom of her back, the other in her hair as he leant up and kissed her deeply, massaging her tongue with his as he bucked up a little into her, just needing some fucking friction.

She moaned into the kiss at the jolt it sent through her and that's all he needed. The grip on her hair tightened and he rested his forehead on hers, their panting and moaning mixing together as he fucked up into her. Her brain finally kicked in, remembering he wasn't supposed to be doing any work and she started rolling her hips to his. The movement made his head spin and he felt breathless, not caring at how needy he sounded as he moaned her name over and over again. He was already so close and he would have felt ashamed if it wasn't for being able to feel her fluttering around his cock, showing him she felt the same. It had been too long and after what had happened, it was intense to finally be with her once again. He growled low in his chest as she started riding him faster, and he crashed his lips to hers as he started rutting up into her, not being able to help himself. They were both chasing their release now, so fucking close they could practically taste it. His fingers dug into her ass cheek as his body tensed. He felt her clamping down around him like a vice, a loud moan being torn from her throat and that was it, he was off. Coming right along with her with a string of profanities and moans.

They both relaxed, Lila slumping against him and laying her head in the crook of his neck. The pair were sweaty and fucking exhausted now. Murphy felt relaxed, he felt right with the world again, now satisfied once more and at one with his pretty little redhead. He was glad it was finally over, his fucking dry spell as she was too scared to fuck him like he might break. Now it was over with he hoped she wouldn't turn him down again. He wasn't used to not getting what he wanted, especially if that thing was Lila. He kissed the top of her head, his hands stroking her back soothingly as he caught his breath. His ribs ached like a bitch but he didn't say anything, he didn't want her to say I told you so or for her to regret what happened. He could hear her breathing even out and he knew she was falling asleep, the poor thing wore out now, and he smiled to himself. He lifted her off him, helping her lay in the middle of the bed. She didn't even move, just mumbled something unintelligible before snoring. It made his chest swell, she was fucking adorable and he loved her more than he'd ever be able to vocalise.

He noticed Connor then as his brother turned off the tv and stood. Connor shot him knowing smirk and Murphy huffed a laugh at him, his cheeks flushing just slightly.

"Beggin' brother? I am ashamed." He chided playfully as he tugged his clothes off down to his boxers. He hadn't watched them, but he had heard them loud and fucking clear, he had felt them. It had been a whole erotic thing in of itself but he pushed it away. She was tired, she wouldn't be up for him ravaging her when she needed rest. He'd have her tomorrow.

"Fuck off. Fuckin' needed her." Murphy scoffed with a grin, laying down next to her. Connor just laughed at him as he looked down at her. She was in the middle of the bed, not in Murphy's side and he felt almost nervous to try and go back to sleeping how they used to, especially since he had punched her in the fucking face. Murphy licked his lower lip and watched his brother carefully.

"Should be alright, ye said ye've not been havin' nightmares now. Should try it." He suggested quietly, not wanting to wake her. Connor nodded, climbing into bed behind her and wrapping an arm around her middle. He hoped it would be okay, he fucking missed sleeping like this with her. The twins fell asleep beside their girl and for the first night since they got back home, Connor actually slept through without a nightmare despite his twin being on the other side of the bed.


	38. Chapter 38

**There's only one more chapter after this guyyyyyysssss! (T-T)**

**So emotional, I've loved these three. As of now, I have 14 chapters written of the sequel, I'm a little stuck but I'm pushing through!**

**Connor gets his time alone with Lila and Murphy can't resist making some...art. :')**

One of the first things Connor noticed when he woke the next morning was how refreshed he felt. He had actually slept right through and not had any nightmares, that meant he had not physically assaulted his girlfriend, what a fucking winner. The next thing he noticed was how his senses were just fucking surrounded by her. He could smell her cinnamon hair, the smell of her skin that was just so distinctly her. He could feel her beautiful body pressing against every fucking inch of him. His arm tightened around her and he heard her let out a soft moan, stretching her body and only serving further to rub up against him more. His cock was hard, morning wood was the bane of his life, but also hearing her with his twin the night before had him all kinds of worked up. If he didn't have the self-control he prided himself on, he would have just fucked her even whilst she was trying to sleep. But he had waited, and now he didn't want to wait anymore.

Lila was the only thing in his life that made him impatient, and even though he could still control himself well with her, she always brought out that side of him more, the inability to wait. His hand came up and squeezed her breast, she was still deliciously naked from her fun with Murphy and he kissed her neck softly from behind her. She hummed softly, wriggling a little and rubbing her bare ass against his boxer-clad cock. He could just imagine the sleepy smile on her face. She seemed to still be in the blissful state between being fully awake and asleep. He kissed up to her ear as his hand trailed down from her breast to her stomach, slowly and teasing as it made its descent.

Lilas breathing hitched as her cheeks flushed, she could never get used to the way these two touched her, made her feel. It made her breathless and her head spin, it was fucking intoxicating. His hand suddenly vanished and she let out a needy whine before she even had the chance to stop herself, she blushed bright red at the chuckle that came from the lighter twin behind her.

"Greedy lass." He grinned, always loving the way she responded to him. She turned around pouting at him and he lay on his back, boxers now gone, and he licked his lower lip as he looked at her. Her pretty pink cheeks and her bed head, she was sexy and adorable all mixed into one. He wanted her to come to him, once again, and as always the lass was in tune with him. She always was with the pair of them and she always reacted the way they wanted her to.

She straddled him, her messy red hair all over the place as she situated herself over his cock. He looked up at her, a hooded gaze and pupils blown wide as his hands grabbed at her hips greedily. She rolled her hips, rubbing herself on him and showing him how wet she was already for him and he groaned, the sound low in his throat. She was slick against him as she easily glided over his cock and he watched her intently, her lips parted as she pleasured herself against him. He could have just watched her all fucking day doing this, watching her still sleepy face. She was fucking perfect. She looked down at him, mischief twinkling behind her bright blue eyes and he smirked slyly at her. He could tell she was trying to be quiet as to not wake the darker twin who was asleep next to them, but Connor didn't care. He had his turn with her, if he woke it was tough. He wanted to hear her.

He lifted her, letting her sink onto his cock easy with a loud gasp, unable to quieten herself at the feeling. He bit down on his lower lip hard as he stared up at her, he would let her set the pace and enjoy himself. Her face was a picture, eyes squeezed shut as her breathing was laboured, adjusting to having him inside of her. He couldn't help but pull her down and kiss her deeply, pouring himself into the kiss. He was still in awe of the fact that this beautiful lass was his and his brothers, that she loved them. He would never be able to ever vocalise how grateful he was for her. When she broke the kiss, she smiled at him adoringly and it made his heart flutter. She sat back up, smoothing her hands up his chest as she admired him. The twins were different body wise but they were both so perfect it almost fucking hurt her.

She started moving, losing her self restraint, and she moved her hips teasingly at first. She knew Connor loved a good tease, he wouldn't break like his other half though, teasing Murphy was how you got him to hold you down and fuck your brains out, with Connor it was different. He liked the tease for the build-up, for the intimacy of it with her. She didn't do it to push him like she did with Murphy, she did it because he really fucking liked it. He watched her like he was watching the most amazing sight he had ever seen, his hands sliding up her sides lovingly as he just lay there and let her make him feel good. She could feel the fire igniting low in her belly, low and simmering as it slowly started to burn her. She moved a little faster, using the hands on his chest for leverage as she started bouncing on his cock a bit, making the pair of them moan.

She always got lost in the moment with either of them, like the word fell away and she was in her own bubble filled with bliss and pure pleasure. She moved faster, fucking herself on his glorious cock as she moaned, getting louder and more wanton as she did. She could feel eyes on her that didn't belong to the lighter haired boy inside of her and she looked over at Murphy, now awake as he watched her. He had that look again, like she was a rare fucking penny that was so precious and it made her falter just a little. It always caught her off guard when he looked at her that way. Connor was already aware his brother was awake, he could hear his twin's running internal monologue as he watched her, which consisted of a lot of fucking cursing at the fact he couldn't touch her. Murphy was aware he had his turn alone with her and Connor had graciously stayed away, it was only fair for him to return this favour to him, it was just so hard when she was riding his brothers cock like her life depended on it. The light in the loft shone on her and made her hair set alight, the red catching in the light. She looked like a fucking angel setting the world ablaze and Murphy couldn't tear his eyes away.

Lila had to look away from him, it was intense having him watch her this way when she was with Connor. Connor shot her a sly grin, arching up at her more and causing a needy moan to leave her full lips. She could feel her cheeks flush red and if she wasn't currently fucking him, she would have smacked him upside the head. Murphy suddenly got up but she had no time to think about it, Connor pulled her down for a searing kiss. He distracted her enough, that was until she heard the click of Murphy's fucking camera. She sat up, eyes wide as she looked at the dark angel stood at the side of the bed, camera pointed at them.

"Murphy!" She chided, almost clamoring to get off his brother, but Connors grip on her hips tightened as he rumbled a laugh at her embarrassment, not letting her go. Murphy actually blushed, the tips of his ears turning pink as he looked at her.

"M'sorry m'girl, I just...I wanted…" He looked flustered and couldn't get the words out and she couldn't remember the last time she had seen the boy look so bashful. Connor was chuckling and Lila almost hit him again.

"Lila lass, he only wants some o' ye face aye? Nothin' too...intimate." Connor supplied with a smile, hands stroking her hips. It still felt fucking intimate, face or not. But as she glanced to the fidgety dark haired twin at the side of her, stood there naked in nothing but a fucking cast on his leg, she could see his intentions were not anything lewd. He couldn't even meet her eyes, he looked ready to hyperventilate.

"I just...Ye looked like an angel and it inspired me love. M'sorry, doesnae matter." He frowned quietly, his face still bright red as he went to put the camera back. She reached out and grabbed his wrist, feeling guilty. He should have asked her, sure, but his words made her heart ache. She had fucking inspired him to make some art, she wasn't sure what to say to that. She didn't think she was near pretty enough to warrant being called an angel. She blinked at him for a moment and he finally met her eyes, licking his lower lip anxiously. Connor stayed silent, still inside of the girl. Part of him wanted to smack the shit out of his brother for interrupting, but when Murphy mentally mentioned taking some shots of their dear girl in the throes of pleasure, Connor couldn't lie and say it didn't sound appealing. Having that image forever of their girl.

Lila smiled at Murphy, tugging his wrist to pull him to her and kissing his lips sweetly, making him relax into her. She could feel Connors hands still stroking her hips and he arched up at her slightly, making a soft moan leave her lips, almost like he didn't want to be forgotten. She looked down at his smug face and squinted playfully at him.

"You can take pictures, just...tasteful please?" She asked hesitantly as she looked at Murphy, the level of trust she was offering him in that moment wasn't lost of the darker twin. His face brightened with a glorious fucking smile that made her chest explode. Her whole body reacted to that sight and Connors eyebrows raised when he felt her clamp down around him a little. That was fucking interesting.

"I promise Lila." Murphy grinned at her, his body now fidgety with excited energy, not nervous. He moved back away again and started adjusting the lens and Lila looked back down to his brother.

He had been patient waiting for her, she wouldn't have expected any different with Connor. He looked at her with a smile as he sat up with his cock still buried inside of her, stroking a hand through her hair. She gasped when he suddenly tugged on it, pulling her head back and exposing her throat to him. She felt her whole body shudder with desire that was pooling low in her belly and she heard the growl rumble in his chest. Her lips were parted, eyes closed as Connor sunk his teeth into the side of her neck away from his brother, effectively shielding himself from the view of the camera. She moaned loudly, squirming on his cock at the sensation and her movements only made her moan more.

Murphy watched through the lens with rapt attention, loving how his brother was making this so much better for him, like he was trying to give him some good shots. He moved closer to the pair, snapping some shots of her blissful face.

"Open yer eyes _Ghrá Heal _(bright love)." He demanded, making her eyes flutter open, seeing him right there. He snapped a shot quickly before she had a chance to feel awkward and the raw emotion on her face left. She tried to forget about the camera, and Connor was more than happy to direct all of her attention on him as his brother snapped away.

Connor wound a hand around her throat, applying the tiniest amount of pressure and her breathing hitched, a high moan leaving her breathless. Murphy almost dropped the fucking camera at the sight and sound. Seeing his twin have a hold of her throat like that made him feel all kinds of things, he felt protective, a deep instinctive need to throttle his brother for touching her in such a way, despite the fact he knew deep down his brother would never harm her and he had infinite control over the situation. But the noise she made, how her body started writhing on his cock, it floored him. He gathered by now she was pretty submissive in the bedroom but this was fucking something else and he almost tossed the camera to the floor and joined the fuck in.

Connor growled in answer to Murphy's rush of need for the lass and Murphy swallowed thickly, no, it wasn't his time just yet with her and Connor would tear his fucking limbs off in his keyed up state like this. Murphy knew his brother had fully let go once again and he was more animal than man at this point with the girl. Lila was moaning wantonly, the noises echoing in the loft without a care. Feeling the hand around her throat as she rode Connor like that, it only heightened the sensation and it was sending a rush to her head. Connors' eyes were so dark and predatory when he looked at her, a dark smirk on his handsome face.

"Cum, _now_." He demanded, his voice almost a pure growl in her ear. The harsh tone sent another rush through her only this time it didn't fucking end. Her back arched as she cried out desperately, her body squirming as she clamped down around Connor tightly. Murphy wasted no time in capturing the scene on his camera.

Feeling her cum like that around him, hearing her moans and feeling her writhe against him, that was all it took for Connor. He felt a deep satisfaction at the fact her body obeyed his command to cum instantly and the grip on her throat tightened just slightly as he bucked up into her hard, grunting and growling as he met his own release. He let her go then, as soon as he spilled himself inside of her, letting her melt into him as she caught her breath. His hands smoothed along her back affectionately, a stark contrast to seconds ago when he was being rough. Just another testament to how in control the man was even under such circumstances. She smiled to herself feeling weightless as Connor placed a soft kiss to her shoulder. She felt the bed dip down behind her and she felt the other twin winding his hand into her hair, maneuvering her head to face him over her shoulder. He rubbed the tip of his nose against hers sweetly before kissing her lips softly, betraying the intense need for her he was feeling. When he moved away she gave him a lovely smile and he couldn't help but return it as she lay her face back in the crook of Connors' neck.

Murphy looked to his brother, the pair locking eyes for a moment and once again not needing words. It was too hard having her one at a time like this when the other was still present in the loft. Not being able to touch her despite her beautiful moans. It was almost like torture. It had been nice to have her to themselves but they didn't feel the need to make it a regular thing. If the other was asleep or not there then, of course, it was different, but there was no need to have some sort of single claim on the girl if the other was right there. She belonged to the both of them after all. They knew Lila loved it just as much as they did when the three of them were together. It didn't matter who was inside of her or what they were doing, even having a simple touch from the other twin made it so much better and more connected, the three of them could feel that.

It had been nice to have her like this separately, especially after what they had been through, but they had no intentions of doing this all the time, there was no need. They wanted to share her, to both touch her and be with her. They were on this journey with her together after all and what was the point of they started up this shit? It was sure to cause jealousy and tension, especially with how Murphy hated being denied the lass, not being able to touch her. Murphy had seen his brothers lack of control at the end with her, the way he growled at him when he heard Murphy's thoughts about wanting to join in. The darker twin had no doubt they would have fucking fought if it had happened and none of them wanted that. They'd just stick to what they had been doing all along, the three of them doing what felt right. Nothing forced or planned out, or planned too much in Connor's case because he just couldn't help himself sometimes. But things had been good the way they were, just going with the flow, and that's the way they would stay.


	39. Chapter 39

**THIS IS IT! *ugly cries for days***

**The last chapter you guyssssss. OMGODDDDDDDDD.**

***breathes slowly***

**This wasn't supposed to be the last chapter, originally I was gonna do one more, I'm not gonna tell you what it was about but you'll probably guess by the end of this one what it might have been. But I decided against it because I wanted to drag it out a bit longer, so the thing I was gonna do will happen in the sequel...maybe, you'll see what I'm talking about at the end of this one. So I thought this was a good place to end this one, and I'll be starting the sequel like right the fuck now! **

**It feels like such an end of an era and I feel so sad, this story has been my baby for so long now, but the story is far from over. The sequel is next, set during the first movie and there will be another after that. But still, I feel sad. We all know the movie is full of drama and such so their lives are gonna change dramatically in the sequel.**

**I've warned you before and I'll warn you again, it's gonna be super canon divergent and have an AU element in there. The whole thing would have been different anyway just cause Lila exists in their lives, you know? It has a knock on effect and things would be different. So it will be my take on it with Lila thrown in to mix shit up. I hope you'll like it.**

**It's gonna be weird for me, cause I free write everything I do, but obviously there's a plot to follow, even if it's loosely in my case, for the next one, so it'll be a little harder for me not to free write, but I do have some ideas already for certain things. **

**So, I hope this end is good enough for you, remember it's not the final end, it's more of a break. I could have just kept it all going in one giant fic but I kinda wanted to separate it, to mark the end of this era with the boys. But don't worry, there's still so much for these three ahead and I'm so excited.**

**I can't believe I actually finished a fic, holy shit. I love you all!**

Lila was confused, beyond confused even...worried? She was a lot of things. She had been at work as usual, when the twins up and left without a word, leaving through the doors. She'd watched on confused, wondering if they needed a brotherly chat and a smoke outside since they never just left, but after ten minutes and they still hadn't returned, it only made her worry. When she had gone to look outside, her hairy best friend had stopped her, informing her the twins had gone back to the loft and he was under instruction to walk her home after her shift. _The fuck?_ Now she was really worried, she tried to wrack her brain for something that could have upset them, but they'd had a pretty standard day. They'd gone to work and came back in good moods, she had made them dinner and then they came here. Nothing had happened here, it was only the regulars and they'd all been having a laugh. So why in the fuck did the boys just leave without even a goodbye and now she was to be escorted home by her best friend?

It had been two months since the accident and things had been going well for the three of them. They had successfully moved past what had happened and now it was just a bad memory. Both boys were cast and injury free which helped, not having a glaring reminder of everything that went on. They kept their routine as usual, the boys working, Lila cooking for them when they got home, the three going to McGinty's for Lilas shift. It was drama free and it was going well. So whatever the fuck this was, it caught her off guard.

By the end of her shift, the girl was fidgety as shit and Rocco almost throttled her. He was walking her home, her hands wringing and eyes darting everywhere like she'd find the fucking answer in a brick in the wall.

"Please just tell me Rocco." She pleaded for the millionth time on their journey to the loft. Rocco groaned and ran a hand through his hair. It was so hard for him to keep his mouth shut but he knew he had no choice, the twins would kill him if it came from him and not them.

"Can you at least tell me if it's bad? Are they...are they gonna break up with me?" She asked feebly, making Rocco still and turn to look at her incredulously. Her blue eyes were wide and sad and she looked scared, like a wounded animal and Rocco couldn't even believe she even thought they'd do that to her.

"Fuck no! Jesus Lila, why would you even think that?" He asked frowning, not even making a joke about it. Lila just huffed and started walking again.

"Why wouldn't I think that Rocco? All these fucking secrets, it's making me nervous." She sighed softly. Rocco sighed too, nodding a little, he could see why she was starting to get worried but the girl had no need.

She didn't ask again, knowing that for once the funny man wasn't about to crack and give her the goods. He walked her up to the apartment, not just leaving her at the bottom of the building or the twins would have his balls. He gave her a hug and left as she walked in. She looked around, a pit growing in her stomach as she noticed the twins weren't even there, she was fucking alone. Despite Rocco's firm assurance that it wasn't anything bad, she was still worried and she couldn't help but let her mind run away with her. She noticed a piece of torn paper on the dining table and she picked it up.

'_Come to the roof love.'_

She knew it was Murphy, not only because his handwriting was different to Connors, but because he had called her love.

Murphy had always called her love, the very first time he spoke to her he had called her love. '_Ye looked cold love…'_ She felt butterflies bloom in her belly thinking about the first time she saw the pair. She had been grumpy and soaked through and in no mood for company, yet Murphy had come over, draping a blanket around her with a shot of whiskey as his brother had watched on carefully, his brow furrowed looking worried. It had unsettled her then, she didn't know them and they seemed to care about her well being right off the bat. She thought they were both handsome but in her mental state at the time she didn't care so much about it, she just felt weird about them. Like something in her gut knew it wasn't the usual friendliness between them. She never would have imagined that she would end up in love with the pair of them.

She fisted the note and made her way out of the window, trudging up the fire escape slowly. Each step had her more and more convinced she wouldn't like what was coming. She hadn't paid much attention back at the bar since she was busy, but now she thought about it, they had started acting weird about an hour before they left. Muttering to each other tensely in a language she didn't know, not smiling at her when she looked over. She had no idea what to think, she knew she hadn't done anything wrong so it just confused her more. If she knew there was something then she would at least know what to expect, not this. She took a shaky breath as she got to the roof and she stayed silent. The twins had not heard her and she watched carefully, her heart swelling a little. They were embracing, Connors hand on the back of Murphy's neck as the darker twin gripped him tightly. No matter how nervous she was, it warmed her heart for a moment, seeing their closeness, it always touched her deeply. But then dread washed over her again, fear of why they were hugging, why it looked like they were taking strength from each other.

She blinked dumbly as her whole body tingled out of fear and the pair broke away from each other, turning to look at her in unison. They looked slightly caught out, that they hadn't noticed her and she had witnessed them but they looked at her confused. They had felt the rush of intense fear and they didn't know why it was coming from the girl. She made no effort to move, her eyes going from one twin to the other as she swallowed thickly.

"Lila lass, come over here." Connor smiled, trying to be reassuring as he held his hand out to her. He hadn't expected her to be this nervous, fuck _they_ were nervous, they had a reason to be, but the girl was worse than they were at this point. He knew his twin felt it too when he started shifting on the spot. She didn't comply though, she wrung her hands and looked at them as scared as a rabbit that heard the howl of a fucking wolf and the boys found themselves at a loss.

"Why am I here? Are you two planning on chucking me off the roof once you've broken up with me? 'Cause honestly, it's a little overboard don't you think?" Despite the slight amusement on her face, her voice was shaky like she actually thought the words could be true. The twins glanced to each other, eyebrows raised in shock at her words and they couldn't help it when they both burst out laughing. The words had eased their own nerves, the girl once again reminding them why they loved her so fucking much.

Lila huffed, crossing her arms over her chest as they laughed at her, but she relaxed a little. It didn't seem like they were about to break up with her if they were laughing like this. She knew she was being dramatic but she didn't like the whole secrecy shit they were pulling on her.

"Fuckin' Christ Lila, we aren't breakin' up wit' ye." Murphy grinned, shaking his head at the head ruefully.

"And no one'll be chuckin' ye off the fuckin' roof either." Connor added with a smirk. Lila just blinked a little before squinting at them. It dawned on them then, just how worried she was about whatever they were about to do. She had thought the worst and it made them feel guilty. The twins looked to each other and Lila could see they were having a mental conversation and it only annoyed her more, why did they ask her here if they weren't going to include her in the conversation? They felt her annoyance before turning back to her with synchronised sighs.

The pair of them were fidgeting now, Murphy more so and Connor gripped the back of his neck affectionately, grounding the dark twin.

"Lila….m'girl… we asked ye here 'cause...well…" He frowned to himself, the nerves getting to him as he couldn't get the words out and Connor squeezed his neck slightly.

"There's somethin' we wanted te ask ye sweetheart." Connor finished for him, giving her a timid smile. It only made her more nervous that Connor himself couldn't hide his anxiety from her, the guarded twin who was normally so hard to read.

"And it couldn't wait or be inside the loft?" Lila asked hesitantly, eyes darting between the pair. The twins shared another look and Lila took a deep breath. Her heart exploded right out of her chest when the twins turned to look back at her, both getting down on one knee in front of her.

Her breathing hitched even higher when Connor produced a box, opening it. She was a little too far away to see exactly what ring was inside of it, but it was a ring nonetheless and the boys were down on one knee, it seemed pretty obvious where this was heading, and Lila felt herself starting to get light headed out of fucking shock.

"From the moment we saw ye, we both knew ye were special, there was somethin' there. We didnae think it was this, mind ye, but we knew it was somethin'." Murphy started softly, licking his lower lip anxiously as he looked up at her, his face just raw and open for her to see. It just made her more dizzy. He had echoed her very thoughts from when she read his note in the loft.

"What we have wit' ye, it's like nothin' else, we can't even put it into words. We never expected this wit' anyone, never thought it was possible, but here ye are." Connor continued, blinking up at her, his voice sounding firm but being betrayed by his nervous face.

"I told ye before m'girl, God made ye for us, there's no other explanation, no other reason for the connection we have wit' ye." Murphy urged on. Lila still hadn't moved, she could barely breathe as her brain tried to comprehend what was happening.

"We can't let ye go Lila, we want ye te be ours forever, the three o' us." Connor continued, glancing to his twin for a brief moment.

"Will ye marry us?" They asked in unison, casting pleading scared glances her way, almost like they fully expected her to say no and rip their hearts out.

She hadn't realised she had held her breath until her vision got spotty and suddenly her eyes rolled back before she hit the floor like a sack of shit.

"Mother o' God!" - "Jesus Christ!" The twins shouted together, rushing over to her. Connor took her face looking concerned as Murphy stared down at her wide-eyed.

"Did we fuckin' kill her?!" He asked sounding mortified and Connor looked at him half amused and half incredulous he'd even asked such a thing, like their words had been able to strike the girl down.

"We didn't kill her ye twit, she just fainted." Connor chided, grabbing the note that had fallen to the floor and using it to fan her. Murphy sat on the chair that was closest to them, chewing his thumb anxiously. It was bad enough she fainted but she hadn't even given them an answer and her face had been unreadable. They had no clue what she thought about the whole thing and now she was out cold.

Lilas' eyes fluttered open and she groaned softly, she could see Connor hovering over her, fanning her and the world looked ass upwards.

"What?" She mumbled confused, making Connor smile affectionately at her as he helped her to sit, she noticed Murphy sat just to her right on a chair looking ready to crawl out of his skin.

"Ye fainted lass." Connor smirked, amusement glinting in his eyes as her cheeks burned bright red at the situation.

"Oh well...that's romantic." She snorted self deprecatingly at herself. Of course she passed out in one of the most important moments of her life. Connor helped her up, holding her tight as he sat her in a chair opposite Murphy and he went to sit by his brothers left, as usual. He wrapped an arm around his brother's shoulder, letting him lean into him. Connor was nervous about the lack of answer too but he knew his brother was about to spontaneously combust if the lass didn't speak. She was just sat there blinking at the table.

"So...you want to marry me? The both of you? How would that...I mean...there's three of us…" She looked confused and the boys felt relief it wasn't a flat out no but it still wasn't the simple romantic yes they were hoping for. But they could see her logic, Murphy himself had wondered this after all, the day he had showered with his brother and his mind had ran away with itself. This whole plan had been Connors. But the girl had not been privy to the plan, so it was natural she didn't understand.

"Well lass, it wouldn't be a conventional marriage per se, but… we would have a weddin' o' sorts aye? Be blessed by the priest, the three o' us, declare our love in front o' God and our family." Connor explained carefully, still confident in his plan. Lila nodded, taking the box that was now on the table and opening it as she mulled it over. She opened the box to reveal a beautiful Claddagh ring. It was silver and the heart was encrusted with diamonds, she felt her throat close up and she wondered how much it fucking cost, was this how they felt every time she bought them something?

She still didn't say anything as she looked at the ring, not even taking it from the box and Murphy was about ready to throw himself off the fucking roof. He should have known it wouldn't be so simple, to ask and get a straight answer, the whole thing was complicated.

"And that's not all lass…" Connor continued, making Murphy sit up straight and look at him, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. He knew what was about to come from his brother's lips and Murphy was scared shitless of what her reaction would be, scared of being hurt. Lila didn't fail to notice the look on Murphy's face and it only made her nervous. She looked at Connor expectantly.

"Well we uh...We wanted ye te marry one o' us legally, so ye'd be officially a MacManus and linked te us both...but we both can't marry ye like that obviously, and I'd asked Murphy if he would be the one te wed ye." Connor said anxiously, looking at her and waiting for her response. Her brow furrowed as that information digested in her brain and the look on her face made Murphy slump in his chair. The deep sting of rejection piercing his soul.

"Ye dinnae have te marry me, if ye wanna marry Connor instead." He bit out, his voice quivering as he shoved the lump down in his throat. Her eyes whipped to the darker twin then looking shocked, he looked ready to cry and it made her heart hurt.

"Why would you think I wouldn't want to marry you?" She asked like it was the most absurd thing in the world.

Murphy felt the relief sweep through his entire body at her words and the thoroughly offended look on her face, Connor smiled to himself, taking his brother's hand in his own and squeezing it.

"Ye do wanna marry me?" Murphy asked hesitantly, looking at her through his lashes like a shy boy. She resisted the urge to pounce on him and kiss his face all over.

"Of course I do Murphy, I want to marry you both...I just…" She sighed, the boys tensed, sensing some kind of rejection in the midst. Maybe they had read her wrong, maybe it was too soon, maybe this wasn't what they thought it was.

"I don't wanna pick favorites, I told you this. I need to know you're okay with it Connor, really fucking okay because I'd technically be Murphy's wife, not yours and that's a big fucking deal." She stated firmly, looking between the pair. They both untensed, glancing to each other, she was worried about the pair of them yet again, about them fighting. It wasn't that she didn't want to marry them, she was concerned about causing friction and it seeming like she was playing favourites. She never ceased to amaze them with how much she cared about their bond together, how she cared so much about them not fighting.

She leveled her gaze on the lighter twin, wanting his answer and he swallowed thickly under her scrutiny.

"I suggested it Lila. I told ye, the three o' us would have a weddin' and blessin', that's enough for me, te me that's the real marriage between us aye? This wit' the pair o' ye, it's just legal te link ye te us both properly. Ye know I'm not sentimental like Murph here, it doesn't bother me none unless it would change things between us. But I know it wouldn't." He said honestly, feeling Murphy squeeze his hand.

"It wouldnae change a thing _deartháir_ (brother), it's the three o' us, always will be." Murphy said softly, looking at his brother earnestly and with so much love it made Lilas' heart squeeze. Murphy was right though, it wouldn't change anything for them, it was the three of them. And she mulled over the whole thing in her head, Connors plan. It wasn't exactly a straightforward proposal which is why she hadn't given them a straightforward answer right away. There were two parts to it. Legally marrying Murphy, so she would become part of their family officially, and then the actual wedding which linked her to the pair of them, the marriage of sorts. The complexity of the whole thing had taken over her mind more than the excitement and realisation of what they had asked her, because she had been confused and trying to work it out. But now it was explained to her, now she understood just what they were asking of her, she felt the butterflies bloom in her belly that these two angels wanted to marry her, they wanted her forever. They even went to such lengths to ensure they could do it.

She was nervous, excited, she was fucking happy. She knew it was soon and things had moved fast with the pair but it was just how it was with them, their bond seemed to amplify things for the three of them. She pushed the ring in the box back to them and they looked at it warily, frowning a little feeling like it was her way of saying she didn't want it. They glanced to each other before back to her as she stood and walked around to their side of the table.

"Well...aren't you gonna put it on?" She asked with a wry smirk, holding out her left hand and wiggling her fingers. The grins that graced the boys' faces were the most glorious things she had ever seen. Pure relief and fucking happiness all over them, making them shine bright from within them. They shot each other goofy grins that made Lila snort and blush as Connor got the ring from the box, he and Murphy both held it, sliding it onto her left finger, the heart facing outward away from her body. They both placed a kiss to her hand and then she looked at the ring, admiring it. She had always loved Claddagh rings but she was often confused by the various ways to wear them and their meanings.

As if picking up on her line of thought, her dark twin spoke, looking up at her through his lashes.

"It means we're engaged when ye wear it wit' the heart outwards, when we marry, ye'll turn it so the heart faces towards ye." He said quietly, licking his lower lip anxiously, like he thought she might take the ring off at any moment and laugh at the pair. She didn't though, of course she didn't. Her heart felt so full and she sniffled a little, feeling herself getting choked up. She looked at them, her eyes shining with tears and their breathing hitched, seeing her so emotional. Seeing the pure love and adoration for them in her eyes shining back at them. Connor felt himself choke up a little and Murphy, fucking Murphy couldn't contain his happiness as he let out a glorious laugh, tears falling down his angelic cheeks.

The stood up in unison and wrapped themselves around her, making her melt into them and just enjoy the moment. She really hadn't expected this, she had been convinced they were for some reason done with her and yet here she was, now engaged to the pair of them. When they moved away, Murphy moved in first, kissing her deeply, slower than his usual kisses. She could feel his tears on her face as she kissed him back, pouring herself into the kiss. When he moved away, he gave her that beautiful full smile he had just for her and wiped his eyes.

"I love ye Lila." He whispered, his voice thick with emotion. Her heart squeezed once more and she beamed a smile at him.

"I love you too Murphy." She grinned, pecking his lips once more. Murphy moved then to let his brother have his turn with the girl and Connor smirked at her, cupping her cheeks and stroking them lovingly.

"I love ye sweetheart." He smiled warmly at her, making her stomach flip around on her.

"I love you too Connor." She smiled, leaning into him as he kissed her firmly, his grip on her cheeks not faltering. When he moved away she blushed deeply and gave them both a smile, wiping her damp eyes. She watched with a grin as the boys hugged each other, slapping each other on the back in congratulations at the fact she had said yes.

"Did she say yes?!" She heard behind her, her head whipping around to see Rocco stood there with a goofy grin on his face. She thought he had gone home, the little shit, he had known all along.

"She said yes!" The boys cheered in unison, making her laugh as the funny man ran over, hugging them both as they all talked excitedly. It warmed her heart so much to watch. When Rocco moved away a little he went over to her, wrapping his arms around her tightly and kissing the top of her head. She was blushing brightly when he moved away and he squinted at the twins, pointing a finger at them.

"Now that's outta the way, if you hurt her, I'll fuck you both up, we clear?" He narrowed his eyes, deadly serious. Lila covered her mouth so she didn't laugh at the big brotherly tone of his words and the boys' eyes widened as they looked at him, because the funny man wasn't joking, he was fucking serious.

"O' course Roc." Connor snorted incredulously as he glanced from his best friend to his brother.

"We'd never hurt her, ye don't need te worry." Murphy finished with a smile, glancing over to their girl with a loving smile that made her belly turn into mush. Rocco's serious face broke out into a grin once more and he slung an arm around Lilas' shoulder.

"I think it's time to fuckin' celebrate!" He announced, earning cheers from the two excited Irishmen in front of her. Lila had no idea what the fuck the future held with these little misfits, her strange little family, but she was excited. They had been through so much in such a short space of time and even with all the heartache, she would do it all again if it meant forever with these two.

"_**Trí na chéile a thógtar na cáisléain".**_

In our togetherness, castles are built.


End file.
